Love, Life, Legacy: A Show About Sex

You're in this place of darkness. Somewhere you feel like you are getting lost but there's this light that you know will guide you to the right path. Pornography is like a war zone, and we as soldiers must never let our guard down because once we do, we'll get shot. We'll get blown up.

Without realizing, this addiction is affecting your life right now in ways that you might not even realize. It's impacting your life hugely, in which you might need to make a decision that is uneasy.

If you're really genuine in quitting your porn habit, then this episode is for you.

For today's episode, Benji Uyama laid out several questions that might also be in your mind like: What is your primary reason for wanting to overcome this porn habit and your masturbation habits? What is the impact of porn in your life right now? How does it affect your relationships right now with the people in your life? Are you truly serious about getting help?

By answering these guide questions, you'll be able to truly determine your sincerity in quitting this addiction.

• The primary reason for wanting to overcome porn and masturbation [2:56]
• Recognize the impact that it has on your life. [03:46]
• How porn impacts you [09:09]
• How the porn industry is skewing the way that we view ourselves and others. [10:48]
• Decisions you have to make with quitting porn [13:20]
• Unification and how every single human being is innately given a sense of genius. [20:40]
• Staying healthy physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually [23:27]
• Porn falsely creates temporary purpose in our lives and provides thrill and excitement that isn't healthy. [24:11]
• What we can do instead to have a strong and healthy mindset free of porn [25:16]

Are you currently in a situation where you feel like you're being trapped in or by your faith? Are you constantly trying to conquer temptations and sins to recover your sexual integrity? Or maybe you're a parent who's very concerned about what your child is going through.

In this episode, Yuki Asanuma shares what his faith taught him in his journey and how it governs his life.

Be inspired and learn how Yuki overcame his struggles in quitting porn and how he sorted his life with the help of God's guidance in order to recover his sexual integrity. This is your sign to take your recovery seriously and learn from someone like the guest who've experienced it first hand. Dive right in to learn more!

• Challenges are never just a challenge but a way for God to give us more love in our life [4:38]
• Good habits and good relationships in your own life puts you in a position to help a lot of people [5:30]
• Embody a living faith [34:38]
• You don't have to be perfect to start helping someone else in their journey. You just need to be authentic and honest. [43:02]
• Believe that you're actually doing better than you are. [45:13]
• Integrity equates to your word being more more powerful than action because it's promised in advance. [45:46]

"Your personal relationship with yourself is the key to lead a healthy relationship."

- Joni Makkonen

Parenting requires love, kindness, caring and patience but there is no doubt that most of the time, conflicts arise making the relationship between the parents challenge its foundation affecting the family especially the children.

In this episode, Andrew and Sammy together with a special guest talk about the stumbling blocks of marriage and the coping mechanisms a professional counselor could advise to families who are experiencing problems and issues similar to this.

Be inspired to stop the stigma and normalize giving importance to emotional wellness just as much as physical wellness. Hop in, reflect and join the informative conversation to acknowledge the strong and weak points of your family that might help you in resolving problems in the future.

• Empathy as a routine [5:52]
• Being guided is a big thing. [11:05]
• Divorce or a separation is only shifting the conflict. [12:10]
• Relationship issues play a big role. [12:53]
• Reflecting on how you were as a child when something stressful happened, and how you responded to it, that is very likely to be a blueprint for how you'll also act in situations as in your marriage as a parent. [21:31]
• Neglect is actually its own form of abuse. [15:06]
• A lot of our behavior is really rooted in our emotions. [16:53]
• People are much more receptive towards constructive criticism. [21:21]
• You deserve to have healthier and greater relationships. [25:52]
• Everyone has their strong points, everyone has their weak points. [30:15]
• Your personal relationship to yourself is the key to lead a healthy relationship. [31:04]
• Love needs to breathe, love needs to be free, and then a love can grow. [32:05]

Does the concept of sexual integrity overwhelm or intimidate you? Do you get confused by what you are feeling, what you've been taught, and what you are seeing around you, and all of them seem to be contradicting instead of intertwining?

Andrew and Sammy are at it again, this time talking about anchors of our sexual integrity. Why is it important to know what grounds you when it comes to your sexuality? And how is this helpful to you as you traverse daily life? Listen to know more!

• Without anchors, life would become very intolerable and unmanageable [11:36]
• Exercise of focus and avoiding distractions [11:55]
• Routines and habits to anchor you and give you a clear mind [12:20]
• Orderliness and organization help people feel at ease. [13:28]
• Having control helps anchor a person [15:21]
• The more you're wrapped up in your own life, the more dramatic your difficulties seem [17:08]
• Being grateful and knowing there are people who are there for you anchors you [17:22]
• Definitely important to always have something to look forward to [19:51]
• Anchors let you see the sunshine again and help you focus on all the many things that can go right and are going right for you [21:53]
• Stay positive and create some very intentional anchors in your life so that you can always find calm even amidst the storm [22:12]

"I understand God's heart more because this is what God deals with on a daily basis."

- Melissa Manor -

As you build towards sexual integrity, it's best to have an accountability group or accountability partner to help you throughout the process. And Melissa Manor shares more about the positives of having an accountability partner for women.

An accountability partner isn't someone who's going to "tell you off" or lecture you on what's good or bad, or what you should and shouldn't do. An accountability partner is someone you will journey with as you sift through the challenges today's world and culture pose.

Women in particular have a more difficult time to come forward with questions about their sexual integrity due to the surmounting pressure brought about by peers and society in general. This is why having a Women's Accountability Partner makes a world of difference.

• An accountability partner is holding someone's hand and provides love and support while on that journey towards sexual integrity or porn recovery and sexual integrity support [12:14]
• Don't over commit but also you should push yourself [7:44]
• There is a deep friendship and connection formed out of the healthy-give and take relationship [9:43]
• Sharing not just struggles but who you are as a person [10:18]
• Difference between men who struggle with porn or masturbation and women: [10:57]
• • For men, you feel like you're stuck in a prison and you're trapped by this, but you know that you're in prison with other people
  • For women, it's like you're in the same prison, but you're in solitary confinement
• Porn and masturbation is such an undiscussed topic but so many people are struggling with it [11:24]
• Remind people they are not alone and someone is there for them with their struggles [12:34]
• Accountability Partners also share their own story and open up about their own journeys and challenges [13:55]
• The crisis of sexual integrity is more prevalent in the younger generation and they don't even know what's going on [18:19]
• Encouraging people to sign up and become accountability partners

At the beginning of 2021, many of us tried to incorporate different disciplines and routines for the sake of self development. While some were successful, others fail to do so and ended up feeling more dejected than when they first started.

Spiritual practices are equally important, if not more, since there are many issues a person faces that can be resolved by a sound spirit. Because a healthy soul and spirit leads to a healthy mind and body as well.

So take out your pens and papers and jot down how you can create and implement winning spiritual practices in your daily life.

• Prayer is vital, it's like oxygen to the body [04:28]
• Why spiritual habits are important [06:20]
• Curating your mornings is fundamental to put you in a healthy state of mind, heart, spirit and body [07:05]
• Spiritual practices lift you up and help you connect to the divine and to your sense of purpose [8:15]
• Constructing and revising the rituals will lead you to creating a sense of limitlessness in your mind, heart, spirit and body [10:36]
• The things you do should be connected to your North Star Goal [12:52]
• Going for your day [13:37]
• Spirituality is about being happy in spite of what's happening in the external world, not conforming to it [18:28]
• Find your way to keep that fire burning brightly [19:54]

Why does healthy, clean sex have such a bad rep and people often go for the hypersexualized yet completely unrealistic option? Why is fantasy sex more sought after than heavenly sex?

Whether it be video games, the movies, and all the shows that we binge-watch on various streaming channels, sex has been the selling point. However, the unhealthy presentation of sex in these various media often causes an imbalance that, if not corrected early on, will reap all sorts of problems and challenges for an individual within and outside a committed relationship.

Listen to Episode 55 to know more about heavenly sex and High Noon's 15-Day Challenge!

• Sex is connected to so much of the hardships and the dangers that exists in the world [05:08]
• Sex is not just about hoping that it doesn't become a negative, it's meant to be a huge positive [06:15]
• Sexual scandals are predominantly caused by men who abuse their power [06:49]
• Lovemaking is the recommitment to the mind, body and spirit of another person [11:39]
• When it comes to media, imagine the possibility of unbridled creativity that doesn't rely on sex [13:04]
• The heavy use of and reliance on video games as escapism, which is extremely hypersexualized [22:57]
• Porn and media stimulate the division between men and woman and denigrates the relationship between men and women [25:56]
• The absence of intimacy creates division [27:42]
• Highnoon.org - 15-day challenge [31:58]

Do you ever wonder if we deserve the level of freedom we enjoy? With all that's been going on in the world, with society and culture being influential in how we make use of the freedom that's available to us, there's always that risk of abusing that very same freedom.

What does responsibility have anything to do with freedom? In this episode, the dynamic duo of Andrew and Sammy go in detail about how these two intertwine, and why we should all be aware of it.

• God has the most miserable public relations ever because of the people that represent God [02:00]
• There's something about responsibility that makes us want to avoid it [06:06]
• Correlation of responsibility and pain [07:39]
• Deep, innate need of all humans to be needed on some level [09:40]
• Inability to grow without other people, you grow in relationships and your commitment to the relationship will define how responsible you feel about that relationship [11:12]
• Being fearful of marriage and being responsible for the outcome of that relationship [12:14]
• Willingness to acknowledge responsibility has a huge effect on the success of an individual's growth [14:18]
• Freedom plus responsibility equals an increased level of enjoyment and more freedom [15:02]
• Freedom without responsibility is a declining amount of freedom [15:09]
• Ownership is not a matter of signatures and documents, ownership is the look in a person's eye when they're dealing with the thing that they are taking responsibility for [18:11]
• Our experiences are a direct result of our own choices [19:00]
• When we're willing to be responsible, then we can actually get the things that we want. [21:05]
• Something in you grows, and you receive benefit from that [22:27]

True Parenthood is the focus of this week's episode, as guest Dr. Maarten Meijir, educator and author of the book People Who Choose the Unification Church, shares about what lasting love is and should be.

Is love purely a physical endeavor? What does good sex mean and how can you have a relationship founded on the principle and centered on belief in God?

And how does educating oneself increase his or her intimacy and relationship not just with his partner but more importantly with God?

• The book on The Marriage Blessing, and the Principle for Lasting Love, Good Sex, and True Parenthood (10:32)
• Sex is a focal component in Maarten's book because everybody thinks about sex in one way or another, either in a positive way, a negative way, or mixed up way or a neutral way (12:28)
• The problem is people who dominate the discussion on sex don't have a clear or coherent philosophy for life or human relationship (16:06)
• Another huge problem is absolute sex or morality based sex, or a heavenly sexuality or anything, has terrible marketing, and it always has, and it's always associated with prudishness (21:47)
• The reason why we fall for so many traps along the way in the area of sex is because there has been no vision for what it is that we're striving for (24:49)
• Addressing the issue of personal development and knowing oneself in order to recognize what it is you should and shouldn't be doing (37:33)
• Remember that God's love is infinite - you can bathe in God's love (47:38)
• Never give up on yourself. And in difficult situations, have people around you that are your anchors to help you and give you advice (50:52)

Another stimulating episode as Andrew and Sammy talk about how important it is to have accountability and fidelity in your marriage. Based on a high-profile story of a pastor from a mega church whose affair led to his dismissal from the ministry and his marriage and family life almost crumbling.

Accountability is hugely important since it requires an individual to be mature enough and responsible for their actions and value their work by keeping certain standards. But the thing is the older you get, the more responsibilities we have, which is something we cannot escape yet we at least have control over.

• Story of the fall out of one great leader (1:49)
• Advantages and disadvantages of being accountable (4:41)
• A true leader is somebody who's showing an example (9:24)
• Appropriateness: Valuing Elegance and Dignity (12:40)
• The importance of details (15:43)
• The level of transparency (17:23)
• Importance of accountability in a relationship (23:00)
• The virtue of honesty and when and to whom you should divulge personal or intimate information (25:30)