Make the Shift

Often when people are referring to boundaries they are talking about external boundaries.  These are the boundaries that we set with other's, to let them know our limitations, our preferences and our needs.

However in order to first set external boundaries, you have to be able to set internal boundaries.  This means that you can set a boundary with yourself.  FASCINATING RIGHT? 

 Boundaries are not all about what you do with other people-they have a lot to do with how we engage with ourselves.

Tune into this episode and then join the EMPOWERED BOUNDARIES facebook community to share with us what two internal boundaries you have settled on to implement in your life.  

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KRISTA RESNICK | FACEBOOK COMMUNITY | INSTAGRAM | LIVE COACHING & SUPPORT | THE 'SECRET' TO EMPOWERED BOUNDARIES

The topic of boundaries bring up a lot of big feelings for many of us.  We want to be seen as kind and loving.  It feels hard to tell people no and deal with their upset and anger.  Many of us have spent decades, stuffing our truth and not speaking on behalf of our needs and prioritizing what matters to us.  Boundaries can feel so uncomfortable at first, it's almost as if we are doing something wrong.  So much so, that often it even stops us from setting the boundary in the first place.

However, it is yours and my responsibility to own what is true for us and speak in a way that helps us get our needs met.  It is our obligation to ourselves to set healthy boundaries.  We don't have to be everything to everyone.  It's not possible.  We were put on this earth for such a time as this to fulfill our purpose, to shine.  To live free and true.  But if you don't set boundaries, you are signing up for resentment, depression and loads of overwhelm and anxiety.  

This week on the podcast I spoke to Roshi who is wanting to set boundaries with her family to get started.  

We talked about how to release some of the resentment that she is already battling from years of taking on so much and ways that she can move forward to begin to carve our space for herself.  

Before you listen to this episode consider:

Do you struggle to set boundaries?

Are you overwhelmed ALL THE TIME?

Do you often feel angry and resentful?

Do you often say YES when everything in your body is begging you to say NO?

Do you tell yourself the story, if I don’t do it, no one else will?

Do you struggle to let go of control?

Do you think if you set a boundary you will be perceived as mean, unkind and unloving?

Listen to this episode if you want support around setting loving boundaries to get the space you need AND the connection you crave.  

Krista Resnick | Instagram | Facebook |Empowered Boundaries FB Community | Permission Granted Podcast Application

The Secret of Setting Empowered Boundaries Workbook

I am dedicating this show to my favorite topic-BOUNDARIES!!!

Boundaries are one of the key ways that we have better, more fulfilling relationships with other people.  They are what truly help us to be successful with one another.  

In this episode I break down what boundaries are, the benefits to knowing your boundaries and four KEY things I want you to know about setting healthy boundaries.

If you are ready to create more space and connection in your life-than this is the episode for you.    

Krista Resnick | Instagram |Facebook | Empowered Boundaries Facebook Community

Most of us have been taught since early childhood that emotions are bad.  And when we think our emotions are bad, we will do ANYTHING to avoid them.

Anything we want in life, healthy relationships, boundaries around our time and energy, a stronger intuition, a better relationship with ourself starts and ends with our emotions.

And yet, we will do anything to avoid feeling them.  We work with healthy diets and exercise, we manage our reactions, we work as professionals at our jobs and yet we ignore the richest source of information-our emotions!

Our culture today reinforces us to not get bogged down by our feelings and emotions.  Just consider for a moment some of the names that men and women are called when they act on behalf of their anger or their sadness.

When we believe that our emotions are bad, we begin to put masks on our emotions and vulnerability to cover up from being cast out of the tribe.  We lean into our patterns of co-dependence, people-pleasing, perfectionism, and automatic programming.  Eventually this creates a really in-authentic life.

This is what I talk about with Karla on this episode and SO MUCH MORE.

Remember, you were created to be an expression of your purpose, to set healthy boundaries and forge fulfilling relationships.  And you cannot do that without honoring your emotions.

If you struggle to connect with your emotions, listen to this episode to find out how to make changes and feel a sense of freedom along the way.

Krista Resnick | INSTAGRAM | FACEBOOK

KARLA MCLAREN | FACEBOOK | INSTAGRAM 

THE LANGUAGE OF EMOTIONS | THE ART OF EMPATHY

To create real and authentic conversations, we have to be willing to be honest.  Most of us weren't taught how to do this.  We were taught how to live in our patterns of people pleasing, approval seeking, perfectionism and "work harder" modes.  Often these patterns are like we are wearing a mask, blocking us from our true and honest selves.  

Lately, I have been thinking about radical honesty.  It's not always easy to live a life that feels true.  It's not always easy to speak our truth.  It can feel difficult to take off the mask that we have used for so long to keep us safe.  However the alternative is living a life that doesn't reflect what God has called us toward and who He has called us to BE.  

The more we are willing to explore what stands in our way of honesty, we more we can start to work toward taking off the mask and allowing ourselves to be seen for who we are.  I think that is the greatest freedom in the world-Freedom to be honest, freedom to live in a way and speak in a way that represents who we were created to be.

Listen to today's episode and give yourself permission to try the mindful practice so that you can start showing up honestly in your most important relationships.  

Krista Resnick | Instagram | Facebook 

FREE~How to stop over-reacting and live with more peace and purpose instead.

NonViolent Communication

My guest today, Dr. DelRae grew up in a somewhat idyllic situation.  She was raised in a small town on a farm with only 34 students in her graduating class.

She was taught strong values, morals and had a work ethic that was solid.  However, as a young adult, DelRae was forced to unravel some of her own limiting beliefs due to some really challenging situations.

Outwardly, she appeared as though she had it all together.  However, inside she was struggling.

DelRae found herself working harder and harder to escape her emotions and some of what was going on in her life.  Slowly she began to play what she refers to as the when….then game.

When I reach this (level of income, meet this person, fill in the blank), then I will be happy.  Perhaps you know this game well too?

When DelRae found herself at rock bottom, she finally looked in the mirror and took responsibility for her choices and life.

DelRae’s desire is to give women permission to believe that they can design their life through their authenticity and who they are.  She empowers them to believe that they have the power to overcome every limiting belief that has been interwoven into their system.  Dr. DelRae Messer, DC is CEO of WellSpoken Lifestyle, a global health, well-being and beauty company that believes everyone deserves to experience a healthy, joyful and abundant life.

She graduated magna cum laude from Northwestern Health Sciences University in 2007. Her passion for solving the health care crisis started as a young athlete in a rural farming community in North Dakota.  After creating a sustainable lifestyle weight loss program in her Chiropractic office, she moved her business online, partnering with Isagenix International, a global holistic nutrition and well-being company.

Before listening to this episode, consider:

KRISTA RESNICK | INSTAGRAM | FACEBOOK 

FREE~How to stop over-reacting and live with more peace and purpose.  

DR. DELRAE | INSTAGRAM| FACEBOOK 

"Listening with an open heart is the ultimate spiritual act.  It is the greatest gift you can give to another person and ultimately yourself." ~Harriet Lerner

Have you ever been in a relationship where you have been truly listened to?  Have you ever been with someone who you truly felt that all of you was welcome?  

The art of listening can do just that.  True listening creates a space where your loved ones feel see and heard.  Where they feel safe enough to let their guard down and be who they truly are.  What a gift!

However-so much of what have been taught in our Western culture is how to do the talking!  We interrupt and think while the other person is talking of everything that we want to say.  

Lyn Lindberg, my guest today, shares that we haven’t been taught the skills of listening.  Quite frankly, our culture doesn’t value it.  Our society values being in the limelight.  It values the ones who are shouting-"look at me, I'm spectacular!" 

And yet, listening is the gateway to healthy and rich relationships.  

If you want a more intricate way to improve your relationships, listen to this episode where Lyn walks us through 8 key listening skills that we can practice to benefit from the gift of being truly connected with the people who matter to us.  

Krista Resnick | INSTAGRAM |FACEBOOK|

Big T Trauma EXPLODES, little 't' trauma ERODES-Nicole Lewis Keeber

Have you ever felt like this world wasn't safe to live in?  I don't mean our current circumstances per se (although those do apply here as well).  But as a child, did you ever feel like you grew up in a system that wasn't built for you?

My guest today felt that way herself.  Nicole Lewis Keeber has a passion for making this world a safer place to live in for those who don't feel safe.  Growing up in a conservative community and Southern Baptist home, she struggled to see the world the way the systems and institutions around her taught.  On top of that Nicole also struggled with school.  All of this resulted in what is called little 't' trauma.

Nicole has used her little 't' trauma experiences to drive her passion of helping people understand what trauma really is.  When you understand what trauma actually is, you can then begin to understand why you might feel stuck, overwhelmed, having the same argument over and over or not moving forward in your career or business.  

Nicole uses her expertise as a therapist to help business owners and entrepreneurs understand  the impact of small t trauma on businesses. Her biggest, more important work is in combining therapeutic processes with business coaching to help entrepreneurs build emotionally sustainable & financially successful businesses.

This is such an essential episode to listen to.  Understanding how little 't' trauma can impact you will change your life.  It opens you up to choosing a healing path that feels good for you so you can grow and begin to really live out your God given potential. 

Krista Resnick | Instagram | Facebook | Free~How to stop over-reacting and live with peace and purpose instead.

Nicole Lewis Keeber | Instagram | Facebook | Nicole's free trauma assessment | Nicole's book

"You deserve the best because your loved ones deserve the best of you, not what's left of you." - Becky

 What do you think about when you hear self care?

In today's world we have motivation and inspiration all around to push us to keep going. But I want to remind you that pushing yourself to keep going often leads to burnout and many times it’s mandatory to STOP and remember how massively important it is to practice TRUE SELF CARE.

Self Care is not a waste of time, it is an INVESTMENT in a healthier, more productive time in the future. It is an investment in your relationship with YOU.

Perhaps you, my listener, have bought into the "GO CRUSH IT" hype and you are feeling exhausted, burned out and drained.

It appears we talk about self care once we reach that point of exhaustion.

And often, it's only when we wear ourselves out mentally, emotionally and physically that it somehow justifies taking a break so we don’t feel guilty. But because we are so depleted and empty, it just barely gets us back to baseline.

In today’s episode, my Guest Becky Lauridsen and I talk about what self care really is, why it matters, what stops you from practicing it and a whole lot more. 

Becky is a Licensed Professional Counselor and crazy passionate about increasing self care and decreasing the mental health stigma. She is the Founder and Lead Supporter of IOME. It's an I Owe Me instead of an I Owe You offering Guilt Free Self Care by partnering with local businesses to offer discounted self care services and products to individuals, groups, and employers. IOME is one of the first to take a preventative approach to our mental health and wellness by providing simple and convenient access to mental wellness.

Becky is also the proud wife to her cowboy husband, Tyler, and mother to two beautiful girls, Bryer and Brystol. She believes that similar to our physical health, we can take a preventative approach to our mental health too.

Becky shares with us the difference between self-indulgence and true self care and how to make guilt free self care a daily practice.

Intentional self care doesn’t have to be for hours a day, and certainly does not require a spa or weekend in Bali.  It is an investment in your well-being. If you’re a mama wondering how you will ever find the time to practice self care, then this episode is for you.  A small dose  of true self care is essential because you will be more emotionally, mentally and physically equipped to deal with your responsibilities and show up for the ones you love in an intentional and epic way.

Krista Resnick|  | INSTAGRAM | FACEBOOK 

FREE-HOW TO STOP OVERREACTING AND LIVE WITH MORE PEACE AND PURPOSE

BECKY LAURIDSEN | INSTAGRAM |FACEBOOK

The past year and a half has been a has been a huge challenge when it comes to my sense of peace and inner freedom.  For me, I understood that it was time to look deeper as to what was going on and release myself from whatever was happening internally.

I was tired of feeling lonely and isolate.  I was tired of always being triggered by someone.  I was tired of trying to control.  Judgment was one of my own personal strategies that was so familiar and addictive to my feeling uncomfortable.  Judgment was something I learned early on, made me feel better for a brief moment, but eventually I crashed with a hangover that felt at time almost unbearable.  

We are hard wired for connection.  But my judgment kept me blocked from the very thing God created us to experience.  Depth, connection, and intimacy are spiritual ways of being.  They add so much richness to our lives.  Without them, life is meaningless and loses it's sense of purpose.  

If you struggle with feeling connected and experiencing deeper intimacy in your life, I am inviting you to consider ways in which you have used the shield of judgment to protect your tender heart.

Listen in to this podcast where I unpack my own personal struggle and healing with judgment and what you can do to take some next steps in your own life if you battle with this too.  

Krista Resnick | Instagram | Facebook