Making Changes Breaking Barriers

I am super excited to bring you the first episode of the Making Changes Breaking Barriers Podcast with a guest! 

I am delighted to have Britt Frank joining me on the show today! Britt is a therapist, trauma specialist, and educator. She is also the author of the book The Science of Stuck. 

Britt speaks and writes about the mental health myths that keep us stuck and feeling stressed. She speaks from personal experience as well as her education and research. Through her work, she helps us understand what is going on in our heads and explains how to make sense of our messy thoughts and emotions so we can heal and move forward.

Britt believes that it is not enough for us to do well. We also need to be well. In this episode, she tells her story and discusses her motivation for doing the work she does and for writing her latest book, The Science of Stuck: Breaking Through Inertia to Find Your Path Forward. She gets into the brain science behind “You are not Lazy, You are not Crazy, You are not unmotivated” and incorporates the myths that keep us trapped and anxious. She also dives into making sustainable changes and shame and shares keystones for self-care.

Links:

Connect with me on my website

Find me on social media @ChangewithCoachK

The Science of Stuck: Breaking Through Inertia to Find Your Path Forward is available from most major book retailers or on Amazon.

Today, I am excited to dive into the big picture and share the things we need when making a change. 

There are four specific things we need when making a big change, and I’ve put them all together in what I call the DARE Method:

The DARE Method to Change:

1. Discover your mountain
2. Actions for Alignment
3. Roadblocks
4. Endless Beginning

Links:

Connect with me on my website

Find me on social media @ChangewithCoachK

A common roadblock people on a growth journey tend to run into is associating with toxic people. That’s why I strongly feel we must be intentional about who we share the growth part of our lives with if we want our changes to be sustainable.

In this episode, I describe five types of toxic people and explain how to deal with them.

Links:

Connect with me on my website

Find me on social media @ChangewithCoachK

As we enter this new year, part of our thinking should be about ways we can embrace our purpose, our goals, and our path. In doing that, I have an important question: How have you judged yourself today? Come on, think about it–and be honest! Why do we criticize ourselves so harshly instead of showing ourselves love and compassion? We are conditioned from a young age to compare ourselves, question ourselves, and judge ourselves. Constructive criticism can be a good thing to keep us on track and help us grow, but sometimes that criticism turns to deconstructive criticism. We wouldn’t put up with a coach doing this to our kid in little league soccer, so why do we do it to ourselves?

We need to learn NOT to punish ourselves, listen to negative self-talk, and blame ourselves. It is difficult to make this change in perspective, and it is the biggest reason that people throw in the towel on their dreams. Unfortunately, most of us habitually convince ourselves that we should quit because we aren’t good enough and that we should have never started on this path—even when it is the path we are supposed to be on!

Let’s talk about it. We all need to hear why it’s so hard to give ourselves a second chance and the secret to making it happen, along with actionable steps you can take TODAY to give yourself the love and compassion you deserve on the path to finding joy and success in your purpose. 

Christmas has come and gone, and the New Year is fast approaching.

Everyone loves to make New Year’s resolutions. However, statistics show that most people only stick to their resolutions for a few weeks.  

So, rather than abandoning the idea of New Year’s resolutions entirely, I think it’s a good idea to sit down sometime between now and the New Year to think about what has been going on in our lives, what we would like to change, and what we hope to achieve in the coming year.

To make that activity even more meaningful, I get into three things today that we need to understand. I also share some strategies to help us optimize the new habits we intend to implement in the New Year.

Links:

Connect with me on my website

Find me on social media @Change with Coach K

Resources:

Books mentioned: 

Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance by Angela Duckworth

80/20 Running by Matt Fitzgerald

Holidays are a lot of fun, but they can keep us so busy!

Most of us like to travel and visit family and friends when the holidays come. But that can leave us worn out and feeling like we need a week or two to recover when we return to our regular lives.

Some of us have no time during the week, so we try to cram everything in on the weekends, leaving us exhausted at the start of each week. That is a vicious cycle, and it could have devastating consequences on our health if we fail to find the time to rest, relax, and recover.

So, in this episode, I offer ideas on how to structure each day to give us more time, and I also share five ways to convince ourselves to rest when necessary.

Links:

Connect with me on my website

Find me on social media @Change with Coach K

Book mentioned:

Rest: Why You Get More Done When You Work Less by Alex Soojung-Kim Pang

Resources:

Speed and accuracy at completing tasks are both better in the morning: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/1131476/  

The ability to remain alert tracks closely with sleep and wake schedules:

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/2519602/ 

Everything in life is constantly changing, and so are we.

Mastering the skill of navigating change will ultimately allow us to live successful lives filled with purpose. However, in getting there, we must remember to be grateful for all we have and love ourselves for who we are. 

Practicing radical self-love is vital for our emotional wellness, and having that emotional wellness is essential if we want to stay consistent on the challenging path of change. So, in this episode, I get into what self-love is and what it is not. I also share five simple and actionable ways to practice self-love.

Links:

Connect with me on my website

Find me on social media @ChangewithCoachK

Books mentioned: 

The Mountain Is You by Brianna Wiest

Resource:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/200809/the-path-unconditional-self-acceptance 

Why do some people succeed when others fail?

That question seems to imply that we can only succeed or fail. When in truth, life is not black or white. Nor is it like a horizontal line that ends in success or failure.

There are many different types of success, and every individual has a unique idea of how success should look. Research has shown that no one thing leads to success and determines why some of us succeed when others do not. Even so, some common themes run in those who reach their mountaintops. So, today, we will dive into some of the reasons why some people succeed when others fail to do so.

Links:

Connect with me on my website

Find me on social media @ChangewithCoachK

Resources:

https://www.ascd.org/el/articles/grit-and-the-greater-good-a-conversation-with-angela-duckworth

https://www.theplayerstribune.com/articles/justine-siegal-mlb-coach

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned in my journey is that even though it’s good to focus on self-development, be mindful of our thoughts and emotions, and do whatever else it takes to grow, something will be missing if we do it alone. 

With no one else to share a different perspective, challenge us, or give us feedback, all our thoughts and conclusions are based purely on our own experience. So, when we close ourselves off from the outside world and do the work alone with no input from anyone else, it means we are only bettering ourselves in ways that we think are important, and nothing else matters. 

Links:

Connect with me on my website

Find me on social media @ChangewithCoachK

Resource:

https://breathe.ersjournals.com/content/breathe/13/4/327.full.pdf 

The holidays are almost upon us! 

Many of us find the holiday season exciting and look forward to spending time with family, friends, and loved ones, while others find it stressful and overwhelming and become fraught with anxiety and tension as the holidays approach. 

So, what can we do this year to make things different? How can we go into the holidays with confidence, knowing that we will enjoy our time with friends and family while also taking care of ourselves?

Being aware of the difficulties the holidays can bring and understanding how those things have affected us in the past allows us to plan ahead and set boundaries to ensure that we come out of the holidays unscathed and feeling cheerful, contented, and carefree!

Links:

Connect with me on my website and be sure to join my community there.

Find me on social media @ChangewithCoachK

Books mentioned:

Boundaries in an Overconnected World by Anne Katherine