You've been looking forward to the weekend all week. Finally — no obligations, nowhere to be. And then it arrives, and instead of relief, you feel... anxious. Vaguely guilty. Like you're forgetting something important.

Sound familiar? You're not broken. You're well-trained.

In this episode, I kick off a new focus on fun by starting with what gets in the way. Because before we can have more fun, we need to understand why fun (and rest, and doing absolutely nothing) can feel so threatening, even when we genuinely want more joy in our lives.

It turns out there are real, specific reasons this happens. Your nervous system isn't misbehaving. It's doing exactly what it's been trained to do.

Listen to find out why rest can feel like falling behind, what your identity has to do with your inability to close the laptop on a Sunday, and the surprisingly small shifts that can start to change all of it.

We've all been there — something in our life isn't going the way we want, and our first instinct is to think our way out of it. Maybe it's not that bad. Maybe I just need a better attitude. But what if the real missing step isn't reframing — it's acknowledging?

In this episode, I explores one of the most common sticking points I see in my coaching: the thought this shouldn't be happening. It shouldn't be this way. It's understandable. It's often completely valid. And it also keeps us stuck.

In this episode:

• Why trying to force a 180-degree mindset shift often backfires — and what to do instead
• The crucial difference between accepting reality and being okay with it
• How acceptance actually expands your agency rather than shrinking it

Want to share this episode with someone who could use it? I'd love that. And if you haven't yet, please subscribe to Making Midlife Magic and leave a review — it means a lot. Check out ⁠⁠coachingwithrachel.com⁠⁠ to see more of my world.

Hi, I'm Rachel, and I'm not a naturally organized person. We say these things like we're just reporting facts about who we are: I'm not creative. I'm not fit. I'm not good at remembering things. In this episode, I talk about why those "I'm not" statements are anything but neutral, and the powerful coaching question that completely shifted my relationship to my own powers of organization.

I share what happened when my coach asked me, How are you already an organized person? — and how that question unlocked a new relationship to my story about myself.

In this episode:

• Why "I'm not naturally [fill in the blank]" is a thought that keeps you stuck — not a fact about your DNA
• How our brains use self-limiting beliefs to conserve energy (efficiently, and at great cost)
• The difference between this question and an affirmation — and why the distinction matters
• How to find evidence that you're already the person you want to be

Want to share this episode with someone who could use it? I'd love that. And if you haven't yet, please subscribe to Making Midlife Magic and leave a review — it means a lot. Check out ⁠coachingwithrachel.com⁠ to learn more.

This is one of my most downloaded episodes, because who doesn't want to feel happier? Yet often things get in the way -- work stress, family conflict, medical diagnoses. At these times, the very idea of "choosing happiness" can seem like a mean joke.

In this episode I share how we can meaningfully choose happy, even when life is challenging. In this episode:

⭐ How happiness is like ice cream and why it's useful to know what flavor you like

⭐ The difference between grown-up happy and pediatric happy

⭐ The power of adding happy to other emotions

⭐ The difference between thoughtfully choosing happiness and spiritually bypassing less shiny emotions (Why we don't want to slap a smiley face on a rotten potato)

Take a listen and let me know what resonates for you! I'm at [email protected], or dm me on social media.

It's Passover and I'm elbow deep in matzah ball soup preparation, so I'm re-airing an episode connected to the themes of the holiday -- Episode 99, Feeling Free.

We so often want to feel free -- light, unburdened, at ease. Yet often we feel burdened by responsibilities and constrained by the choices we've made. At these times, we often dream of a future time when things will be better -- we'll be retired, on vacation, our kids will be grown, and so on. Focusing on that fantasy keeps us from seeing ways we can feel freer, right now. That's the topic of this week's episode.

The original ending of the podcast celebrates the second anniversary of Making Midlife Magic and I got to update it, because my pod is now four years old! A beautiful toddler. Thank you for being such an important part of my journey.

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What if I told you that two simple words could completely change the way your brain works? If Saturday Night Live ever did a skit about me, these two words would be my signature phrase. And honestly? I'd be fine with that.

The words are: and also.

That's it. Simple — and also :), incredibly powerful.

In this episode, I share why "and also" works so well as a mindset tool, and I walk you through the specific situations where it can make the biggest difference. It all started with a recent experience of my own and how "and also" moved me past my disappointment.

Here's what you'll hear in this episode:

🎯 Why your brain resists nuance — and why that resistance keeps you stuck

🎯 The "and also" shift — how two words direct your brain to keep looking instead of ending the story

I also share specific times when this took will be especially helpful. "And also" isn't about talking yourself out of your feelings -- it's about embracing the fullness of our human experiences. It's about refusing to let one feeling be the whole story. You can be disappointed and also know you're strong. You can be hurt and also love someone. You can feel stuck and also know you're capable of more.

Take a listen and let me know what you think. *************************************************

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* Email me at [email protected]

Most of us think about trust in terms of other people — and right now, trust in institutions and leaders feels shaky for a lot of us. But what if the most important trust we can build is with ourselves?

In this episode, I explore a question that has the power to change everything: How can I build greater trust with myself today?

I share how reframing a simple self-care planning ritual around this question completely shifts its power — and why that shift matters. We talk about the two primary ways we build (or break) trust with ourselves: through our words (how we talk to ourselves) and our actions (whether we follow through on what we say we'll do).

Building trust with yourself doesn't require perfection. Just like in any good relationship, trust is often built in the repair — in the moment we notice we've been unkind to ourselves and choose to come back with compassion.

I also get into something I see all the time in coaching: the person making ambitious plans and the person who has to live with them are often out of alignment. When we make promises to ourselves that we're not fully on board with, we're setting ourselves up to break trust with ourself.

This episode is practical, simple, and profound all at the same time -- and it might shift something for you.

In this episode:

• Why self-trust is the foundation of real confidence and lower stress

• How to make plans you'll actually keep — by checking in with all of you
• A simple daily question that can you can use as a North Star

Want to share this episode with someone who could use it? I'd love that. And if you haven't yet, please subscribe to Making Midlife Magic and leave a review — it means a lot. Check out coachingwithrachel.com to learn more about my world.

Have you ever had a negative thought and felt like it was an emergency? Like something had gone terribly wrong — especially if you've done a lot of self-development work and feel like you should know better by now? I've certainly been there.

In this episode, I'm answering the question several listeners sent me after last week's episode on Eileen Gu and Olympic thinking: Okay, but how do I actually make my head a good place to be?

Here's where I start: with normalization. Negative thinking isn't a sign that something is broken. It's just what human brains do — they're trying to keep us safe. The moment we stop treating every unwanted thought like a crisis is the moment we start having some power over them.

From there, I walk you through the framework I actually use myself — including how I stopped talking trash about my body after literal decades, not through years of painstaking work, but by making a decision. I use the metaphor of being a vegetarian: just because someone offers you something doesn't mean you have to put it on your plate. Your brain is going to keep offering you thoughts. You get to decide which ones you accept.

I also talk about:

• Why giving yourself permission to keep your negative thoughts can paradoxically loosen their grip
• What to do when thoughts are really sticky — and why curiosity and compassion work better than willpower
• The ironic moment that happened after I recorded this episode (my brain is very on-brand)

The goal isn't a mind that never generates negative thoughts. The goal is a mind that feels safe — even when it doesn't feel good.

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In this episode, I'm sharing five powerful lessons from freestyle skier Eileen Gu's viral response to a journalist, where she describes approaching her own mind like a scientist. I explore what it means to make your head "a not bad place to be" — including why negative thoughts are more like dust than disasters, and why fighting them often gives them more power. I also dig into neuroplasticity, the connection between our thoughts and our identity, and why controlling (or changing) our thinking is one of the most profound forms of self-determination available to us. And my favorite insight of all: what if you started each day as the person your eight-year-old self would revere? You don't have to be an Olympian to think like one.

Mentioned In This Episode

Eileen Gu's response to "Do you think before you talk?"

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Contact me at [email protected]

In this episode I share a mindset shift that I've been exploring: What if taking our foot off the gas can get us where we want to go faster? It sounds counter-intuitive, but I've experienced it. After trying to improve a specific health metric, I discovered that the solution wasn’t more discipline. It was actually adding ease back in that helped me to reach my goal. And that got me wondering, Where else am I making things harder?

We often assume that growth requires strain and that doing things the “hard way” makes us more virtuous. But sometimes those beliefs actually hold us back. Whether it’s health, relationship, or personal goals, we may be blocking our own progress by insisting it only counts if it’s hard.

This episode invites you to ask: How could I make this 10% easier? This is especially powerful in midlife. By midlife, we know how to push and how to achieve things with effort. Midlife offers the opportunity to explore a new path, one that reminds us that ease, pleasure, and flexibility might not just feel better — they might actually get us better results. Take a listen and let me know what resonates!

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Contact me at [email protected]