Mama's Daily Dose

Do you keep putting off items for future you to deal with?

If you've ever seen How I Met Your Mother (if you haven't I highly suggest you watch it) then you are familiar with the character Marshall. Whenever that was something Marshall needed to do and didn't really want to do at the time he would say, "That's for future Marshall!" And then he would put if off for future Marshall to worry about.

But what happens most of the time when you put things off for future you to worry about?

The future you isn't so happy with past you!

When you have goals you want to achieve, you must think about the future you. If you want to lose weight, future you is healthier and weighs less then when pizza is put in front of you...do you eat it?

If you want to practice self control, ask yourself "what would future me do?"

The future you that is healthier and weighs less, most likely wouldn't eat the pizza!

Start taking action on items that future you will be proud of you for! If you keep putting everything off, then future you is going to be frustrated with current you!

Take action on something future you will thank you for! Stop putting it off and do it.
www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

"The biggest struggle was keeping hope and belief in myself."
- Viola Davis Finding Me

It is a struggle for many - to keep hope and belief in yourself.

Often we will look at famous people and think they are so confident in themselves and they don't have the same insecurities as you do. But we will never know the full story about anyone, other than ourselves.

I don't know the full story of Viola Davis but through her memoir Finding Me, I do know some of the struggles she faced. And she faced unimaginable hardships. Somehow through it she kept the hope and belief in herself to become who she is today.

She kept that confidence and belief; but that doesn't mean it was easy.  

Belief is rooted in confidence. Are you confident in yourself? Do you really believe in yourself?

We can look to the future of what we want or look at what we have now and feel we aren't where we want to be or where we "should" be. That puts a damper on your confidence and faith.

But ya know what? You've already achieved so much! Write down 3 achievements you've had in your life so far. Use these to prove to yourself that you are confident in yourself, there is reason to believe in yourself. It may be a struggle, it won't be easy; but you can keep the faith in yourself.
www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

What if it isn't your trigger that causes you to react; but your thoughts cause you to react?

A trigger is a cause specific to you.

Let's take chocolate cake. It's your absolute favorite. You are going out to lunch with a bunch of girlfriends and you've told yourself that you are NOT eating dessert because you eating healthy and losing weight! Everything is going great, awesome conversation, delicious food...then the dessert cart comes.

You eye that chocolate cake you can taste that rich chocolate melting in your mouth. You want that chocolate cake. The cake is your "trigger." But what makes you really want that cake is how you are thinking about it. You are thinking of how delicious it is and all the fun memories you've had surrounding chocolate cake.

Now, what if you think about a cockroach that just over that delicious, mouth-watering chocolate cake? Do you still want it?

You changed your thoughts about the trigger and all of a sudden it doesn't sound so awesome anymore.

Think of one of your triggers. What do you currently think about it? What can you change about your thoughts? Most likely you can't change the trigger, for most of you your trigger will be there unless you go to great lengths to avoid it; but you can change your thoughts around it.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

Starting in October we tend to see a decline in self- control. It starts with Halloween, then rolls right into Thanksgiving, next thing you know its Christmas and New Years.

Your self control starts to decline a bit; whether it is with food, healthy eating, exercising, shopping, drinking, patience and whatever else you want to work on, but can't seem to stick to it.

Understanding what exactly self-control is can help you to work on the skill and stay on track to achieving your goals and who you want to be.

Self control is a trait and skill. Like all traits, some people are born with more than others. But regardless of how much you are born with; you can still work on this skill.

There is a fantastic book all about self control and it started with a Marshmallow Test with kids. The book, The Marshmallow Test, Mastering Self Control, by Walter Mischel dives deep into what self control is and the factors that both cultivate and destroy it.

Kids sat in front of a marshmallow and were told if they stayed there and didn't eat the marshmallow or ring the bell, then they would get 2 marshmallows (instead of 1). Some kids waited and others did not. What made the difference between the two?  

Self control made the difference.

What is self control? When a number of kids from a KIPP (Knowledge is Power Program) school were asked, many of them answered the same way: "thinking before doing."

Notice self control in your daily actions. Do you think before buying all that stuff on Amazon? Do you think before eating the cookie? Do you think before pouring a glass of wine? Do you think before losing your patience with your kids?

Take notice of where you are and are not exercising self control.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

Do you have faith in yourself like your kid has faith in the tooth fairy?

It sounds a little ridiculous as an adult but remember how magical the tooth fairy sounds when you're a kid...
A fairy that flies in, gently grabs your tooth and leaves you money under your pillow.

As an adult it sounds kinda creepy - A person with wings somehow flies in your house, has to be super quiet in order to take a tooth that fell out of your mouth and for some reason she wants the tooth over the money she gives. And what does she do with the teeth anyways???

I have so many questions...

But I digress...the point here is if your kids can believe and have faith in this magical fairy that would rather have their tooth than cash, then surely you can have faith in yourself.

What is faith???
Dictionary.com says:
“confidence or trust in a person or thing."
"belief that is not based on proof."

Your child has that confidence that the tooth fairy will come and trade their tooth for money. They've never seen said tooth fairy, they have no proof; yet they still believe.

Do you have confidence in yourself? Do you believe in yourself even when their is no proof?

Think of time you had confidence and believed in yourself despite the fact there was no exact proof that you would succeed?

Why did you believe in yourself? What gave you the confidence?


Repeat, repeat, repeat!
An affirmation (or MamAffir

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

At the end of the day do you look back and ask yourself if you really gave your best effort today?

If not, you're with the majority of people. Many people will plan out their days, make a checklist, maybe even set an intention; but at the end of the day most do no look back and reflect on their day. Look at what they did well and how they can improve.

The only way to improve, to get better and become your best is with reflection.

Ask yourself, "Did I give my best effort today?"

If the answer is yes...awesome! How can you do even better tomorrow?
If the answer is no...cool! You have tomorrow to improve - what can you do?

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

“Success is peace of mind that is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best you are capable of becoming.” - Coach  John Wooden, Coach Wooden's Pyramid of Success

What does "success" actually mean?

Success is different for everyone and only you can decide what success means for you, only you can feel when you have "peace of mind."

Think of a celebrity that looked liked like they had everything. To the outside world, they are a success - money, fame, house, beautiful spouse, kids...all of it! Then out of nowhere they quit and people are like, "WTF?!? The had it all!"

But maybe they didn't. Maybe that wasn't their "success." They had all these things that looked like success to society, but they did not have peace of mind. They did not become their best. They knew they were capable of becoming more, in a different way.

Right now, do you have "peace of mind" that you are giving your best as a mom and you? Maybe you look like those celebrities and from the outside looking in you have it "all." But what does success actually mean to you?

Are you searching for YOUR success or society's idea of success? One will give you peace of mind, the other will leave you feeling like something is still missing.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

When was a time you needed to be at your best?

When your kid is sick and scared you need to be at your best to take care of them, show them they are loved, that things will be okay; but maybe you are little scared too. Being able to take all those emotions and care for your kid requires you to be at your best.

When the clock in running out in the championship game and the ball is passed to you - you need to be on!

There are times in life when you are called to be your best, to be on! When these times come are do you show up as your best or do you half-ass your way through it?

Being successful calls for you to be your best when your best is really needed?

Look at a times in your life when you need to be at your best. How are you showing up? If you aren't showing up, that's okay! What did you learn and what can you do better next time to keep showing up better until you show up your best?

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

What makes a mom "successful" or not?

Depends on the person! You get to decide what "success" looks like to you.

What some people or society may deem as successful doesn't look too great to you.

Maybe a successful mom looks like:

• A SAHM that is home every day when her kids arrive and makes a home cooked meal.
• A working mom that contributes financially to her family.
• A mom that starts her on non-profit.
• A mom that starts her own business.
• A mom that volunteers in her spare time.
• A mom that is patient with her kids.

All of these could be right, or could be wrong!

You define what a "successful mom" looks like to you. When you know what your aim is then you can start taking small steps towards that.

There are plenty of examples of successful moms in all arenas - find the ones that speak to you. 

So what does "success" look like for your RIGHT NOW? This could change in a couple years, maybe you're the mom that wants to stay home with your kids now, but in 10 years you want to start your own business. What is success to you now - you aren't married to it, it can (and possibly will) change.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

I remember telling my mom it was her fault I would never be a model! My mom is only 5'1 and with those genes I wasn't going to surpass 5'5 so there went my modeling career!

You were born with attributes and qualities you can't change!
* IQ
* Height
* Where you came from

While you can't change any of these; there are for more that you can change with practice, training and education.

Your mom and dad gave you talents and gifts as well as your height, IQ and hometown.

What are those talents and gifts?

I wasn't given the gift of height - supermodel was not in the cards for me. But I was given plenty of other gifts.

Focusing on cultivating the talents and gifts that are already within you.

What can you do to increase them?
Do you need to educate yourself more?
Put in more training hours?
Practice your craft?

The only way to truly get your gifts and talents to shine is to work on them.

Make a list of your current gifts and talents and look at how you can improve upon what you already have and can control.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett