In this follow-up episode to last week's "When Is It The Last Straw," Adam breaks down some of what he has reflected on, realized, and is starting to learn, even in the past week. However, he also admits that removing his ego from the equation is difficult for him. Danielle and Adam discuss their history with therapy, why it hasn't been effective for Adam in the past, and why he presently is beginning to change his view on it. Adam confronts Danielle about the confusing mixed messages she gave him all week, wanting to have sex despite their fighting and disconnection. Plus, Danielle brings up past events from six years ago, and discusses how never having closure about these awful acts has impacted her overall ability to move forward with Adam.

Episode #31, The Guilt Episode, is referenced a few times in this episode. Listen to that episode from December 3, 2018 for more context.

Want to spend a weekend with Danielle, Leah, and other badass women, embarking on a virtual, groundbreaking journey from January 25th to 27th? We'll be exploring our true sensual and sexual selves at midlife, shedding old stories that no longer serve us, and rewriting our personal narratives as we learn how to truly fulfill our needs and desires.

Register for Beyond Permission with Danielle & Leah here.

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In this difficult, impactful episode, Danielle and Adam get real and raw about some pretty complicated issues they've been dealing with recently. Danielle attempts to "walk the walk" concerning her changing expectations and "demands" about which she talked in the Letting My Freak Flag Fly episode. What set it all off? What influences have led to her fresh understanding of what a partnership should look like? How can Danielle and Adam move forward and not fall back into old patterns? This episode is emotional, vulnerable, relatable, and informative. This is one of those episodes you'll definitely want to send to your partner, or anyone else who might benefit from hearing some "real talk" about struggling through a phase of marriage.

Some other topics and issues covered:

• What is a "gray divorce," and why are they becoming more and more popular?
• What archaic terms and ideals need to be rewritten with new expectations about roles and commitment?
• How can we experience intimacy in a way that's as powerful outside of the bedroom as inside?
• How does upbringing complicate our relationships?
• What happens when one partner is manifesting love in all the ways, and the other is lacking in their display of affection and adoration?
• Why do women initiate such a high percentage of divorces?
• How do we realign after a period of disconnect?

If you loved this episode, please take a moment to rate and review on Apple Podcasts and/or Spotify.

Give the gift of reconnection this holiday, with the Marriage and Martinis' Date Night Questions Book. Perfect for stocking stuffers, host/hostess gifts, for the engaged, newlywed, and empty nest couples.

Listen to other episodes mentioned in this podcast:

Awakening the Sex Talk Demons

The Five Love Languages, Veruca Salt Style

The Five Love Languages, Part Two

The Challenge

Check out Danielle and Adam's 2023 Holiday Gift Guide!!

Want to spend a weekend with Danielle, Leah, and other badass women, embarking on a virtual, groundbreaking journey from January 25th to 27th? We'll be exploring our true sensual and sexual selves at midlife, shedding old stories that no longer serve us, and rewriting our personal narratives as we learn how to truly fulfill our needs and desires.

Register for Beyond Permission with Danielle & Leah here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In the first solo episode since "Is She....Letting Herself Go," Danielle discusses the ways she has always had to "tone herself down" to fit into the confines of societal norms and expectations. However, now that she is older and has stopped restricting herself so much, she is working towards creating a life where she can feel as close to 100% of her true self as often as possible. This means podcasting more, containing to work towards body acceptance and allowing herself to continue to savor aspects of life which we're taught to actually limit ourselves. In this episode, Danielle discusses:

• How we're taught from a young age not to be "too much."
• What she wishes she had been told about careers, sexuality, and monogamy.
• How not restricting herself anymore has actually led to more self-confidence.
• The way giving herself permission to admit her needs and desires has led to more sex and better sex.
• Why she's no longer buying into the concept of "happiness," and what she's focusing on instead.
• What she wants to give her kids permission to do, that she has never felt the permission to do herself.
• All the ways she wants to be weird, and the ways she's letting her freak flag fly higher and higher.

If you liked this episode please take a moment to rate and review on Apple and/or Spotify.

Also, if you enjoyed this episode, you'll also enjoy:

"Is She....Letting Herself Go?!"

Awakening the Sex Talk Demons

Want to have real, raw conversations with your partner in a gentle, productive, and fun way? Don't forget to buy the Date Night Questions, available in print and ebook versions. Use code "reconnect" for 15% off the book, and "e-checkin" for 15% off the ebook.

Want to spend a weekend with Danielle, Leah, and other badass women, embarking on a virtual, groundbreaking journey from January 25th to 27th? We'll be exploring our true sensual and sexual selves at midlife, shedding old stories that no longer serve us, and rewriting our personal narratives as we learn how to truly fulfill our needs and desires.

Register for Beyond Permission with Danielle & Leah here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Danielle and Adam have been participating in their own challenge for over three weeks now, and the results have been awesome. When Danielle first created The Challenge, she hoped that it would lead to improved communication, intimacy, laughter, and connection....and it has far surpassed her expectations. Now, Danielle and Adam are offering other couples to have the same chance to participate in their own version of The Challenge. This month-long experience gives couples everything they need to choose a challenge for one another, prepare for the exciting "reveal meeting" for the challenge, check-in with one another throughout, and end with a celebratory Date Night with exclusive Date Night Questions only accessible to those who participate in the challenge.

With tons of opportunities to feel more seen, valued, and understood, the challenge is unlike anything couples have most likely experienced. Plus, there is only a small time commitment, it's incredibly affordable, and there's room for collaboration and discussion. Listen to episode to hear more details about the challenge, and then head to Marriage and Martinis to sign up, and choose promo code "podcastchallenge" for $10 off your one month subscription. Signing up in only the beginning. Check your inbox on Wednesday to receive your first guide and get going on making this challenge a complete success!! WE CANNOT WAIT for you to join!! The last day to sign up for the November challenge will be November 6th. It will formally begin on November 6th.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In their follow-up episode about The Love Languages, Danielle and Adam go much deeper into everything from the overall concept, certain problematic aspects of the overall phenomena, and what they would both need from EACH of the five love languages. Plus, they talk more about Adam's findings concerning the symbolism behind the upside-down pineapple and the red Adirondack chairs. What are Danielle's thoughts about Words of Affirmation, and what would she prefer to have that feels more organic and authentic? How have their needs for each of the five things changed over time, and what do they need more of now that they may not have needed in the past? Whether or not you've had any experiences with the five love languages, this episode will offer ideas to make it all more productive, comprehensive, and impactful for couples, as well as for friendships.

Want to spend a weekend with Danielle, Leah, and other badass women, embarking on a virtual, groundbreaking journey from January 25th to 27th? We'll be exploring our true sensual and sexual selves at midlife, shedding old stories that no longer serve us, and rewriting our personal narratives as we learn how to truly fulfill our needs and desires.

Register for Beyond Permission with Danielle & Leah here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

People always ask Danielle and Adam to do an episode on The Five Love Languages. So, they're finally doing it. But, they're doing it their own way. Danielle talks about why she refuses to choose one love language. Adam talks about his concern that the love languages quiz would be viewed more of a "test" and how that affected his answers. The two discuss how their love language styles would have most definitely changed over the course of their relationship, and how certain important aspects of their relationship don't seem to fit into any of the love languages. Stay tuned for part two next week when Danielle and Adam go even deeper into what they would want and need from each love language.

Want to have conversations that lead to fun, better communication, and renewed intimacy? Get your copy of The Date Night Questions and use code "RECONNECT" for 15% off the paperback version, and "E-CHECKIN" for 15% off the ebook.

Want to spend a weekend with Danielle, Leah, and other badass women, embarking on a virtual, groundbreaking journey from January 25th to 27th? We'll be exploring our true sensual and sexual selves at midlife, shedding old stories that no longer serve us, and rewriting our personal narratives as we learn how to truly fulfill our needs and desires.

Register for Beyond Permission with Danielle & Leah here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Danielle and Hanif discuss the life events that impacted Hanif so greatly that he co-founded the Center For Equity and Inclusion. Born to a father of Indian descent from Tanzania, and a Mexican-American mother, Hanif breaks down how being a person of color has affected his identity in every space he's occupied in life. Also, how his parents' desire to have their children assimilate into American culture caused a lot of confusion concerning how he should feel about his mixed background. For these reasons and more, he became intensely set on teaching others how we can make schools, workplaces, homes, and communities feel more accepting and comfortable regardless of someone's gender, sexual orientation, etc. Danielle asks Hanif small, actionable steps we can all take immediately if we want to be a part of the movement towards inclusive spaces.

Contact Hanif through the Center for Equity and Inclusion (https://ceipdx.com/).

haniffazal.com 

Pre-Order links for An Other World -

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1774583313

Barnes and Noble: https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/an-other-world-hanif-fazal/1142911253

Powells World of Books: https://www.powells.com/book/an-other-world-9781774583319

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Danielle and Adam have the opportunity to choose one challenge for each other to complete in the next thirty days. They discuss how they came up with these challenges, how they think one another should go about doing the work to complete them, and what the ultimate goal is for each.

Want to spend a weekend with Danielle, Leah, and other badass women, embarking on a virtual, groundbreaking journey from January 25th to 27th? We'll be exploring our true sensual and sexual selves at midlife, shedding old stories that no longer serve us, and rewriting our personal narratives as we learn how to truly fulfill our needs and desires.

Register for Beyond Permission with Danielle & Leah here.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

After a whirlwind phase of chaotic life events, Danielle wants to take a moment and discuss how far she and Adam have come as individuals, as a couple, and especially as parents. But, the two realize that just stopping and living in the moment is difficult when there are still so many uncertainties. Still, the couple attempt to discuss the fact that it's necessary to stop and reflect on how much they've accomplished together over the past year and a half (and longer). Some things the two discuss:

• Why we all need to celebrate the moments that society might not deem "worthy" of an official celebration much more often.
• What Danielle and Adam did as parents that helped their kids through their most difficult times so far, and why it was so impactful.
• How Danielle's OCD has helped her to revel in the "small wins" in life more than the average person most likely does.
• Updates on" Mia's adjustment to college; How Danielle and Adam's attempt to sleep in the same bed is going; how the new house is coming along.

If you enjoyed this (or any other) Marriage and Martinis podcast episode, please take a moment to support Adam and Danielle by rating and reviewing on Apple Podcasts and/or Spotify. It helps them so much, and, it's totally free and easy (just like Danielle).

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.