Masks Off: Inner Freedom For People-Pleasers and Perfectionists

Have you noticed yourself “playing it small” in life? Do you find yourself being afraid to step into courage and would rather be safe and comfortable? Many of us can be courageous in some parts of our lives and other parts we hide behind the mask of comfortability and safety. The problem with doing this is that we are not in alignment with our authentic self when we do this and it can cause much pain and suffering. Kim and Tia share how this shows up in their lives and they share that when they take this mask off and step into courage there is more freedom and empowerment in their lives. Kim and Tia challenge the listeners to find one area in their lives where they are hiding behind the mask of comfortability and step into courage by taking that mask off. Share with us your experience in the Facebook community (link is below if you are not a member).

“You can choose courage or you can choose comfort, but you can’t have both.” ~ Brene Brown

To join us on our Free 2022 Summer “Connect & Grow” live calls the 1st Tuesday of each month at 12 pm Eastern time through August 2nd – please click this link https://bit.ly/3xLVnRK to register for the Zoom link.

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” and “I AM WHOLE” Courses https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Wow!!! In this episode Kim and Tia really take off their masks and show how they overparented in the past and lost their identities as a person. Wearing the mask of motherhood can overtake who we are as individuals. Culture as well as ourselves can put so much pressure and expectations for us to show up in certain ways which can lead to wearing the perfection mask as well as the mask of motherhood.  While it can be very challenging, but it is important to maintain your individual identity if you are in the role of motherhood.

“Not only does overparenting hurt our kids, it harms us too.” ~Julie Lythcott-Haims

To join us on our Free 2022 Summer “Connect & Grow” live calls the 1st Tuesday of each month at 12 pm Eastern time through August 2nd – please click this link https://bit.ly/3xLVnRK to register for the Zoom link.

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” and “I AM WHOLE” Courses https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Taking personal responsibility in relationships is so hard. Most of the time we just want to blame the other and point out what the other person is doing wrong all the time. Certainly whenever we feel attacked or blamed by another, we are going to most likely attack back. Here is the problem with this dynamic, it is often too difficult to have a healthy and thriving relationship. If we can’t own our part and take personal responsibility for our words, our thoughts, beliefs and actions, we will only end up hurting the other. We obviously at times are unable to see our co-creation in the moment, but when we practice taking responsibility we will get better at recognizing and then owning and if need be, we can do a repair. As the quote says, this will only help us get stronger.

“Taking responsibility for things and truly owning them helps us get stronger.” ~Unknown

To join us on our Free 2022 Summer “Connect & Grow” live calls the 1st Tuesday of each month at 12 pm Eastern time through August 2nd – please click this link https://bit.ly/3xLVnRK to register for the Zoom link.

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” and “I AM WHOLE” Courses https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Do you ever feel like you just need to run away and get away from life and the people in your life? This is a very common pattern for most people. Rather than taking a “conscious timeout,” we often just run away. In this episode, Kim talks about how she learned this pattern as a child and how it showed up for her time and time again. She learned later in life after doing her inner work that there is a healthier way to respond whenever she has that feeling of wanting to run away. After all, even if we do “run” away we can never hide from the feelings and the pain. We need to go inward and deal with the feelings and emotions of whatever it is we are trying to run from.

“You can run but you cannot hide.” ~ Anonymous

To join us on our Free 2022 Summer “Connect & Grow” live calls the 1st Tuesday of each month at 12 pm Eastern time through August 2nd – please click this link https://bit.ly/3xLVnRK to register for the Zoom link.

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” and “I AM WHOLE” Courses https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Do you ever feel so overwhelmed with life and other people that you just want to “hit the easy button” and have everything be easy.  Do you blame others and circumstances when you are feeling activated? It can be very challenging being around other people especially when it is your family of origin and it is normal to lose your balance and not take care of yourself especially if you have the tendency to be a people pleaser and a caretaker. Kim shares her experience of losing her balance with her family and she shows how she used the I AM WHOLE Process to go inward and take responsibility for the things that she could control. At the end of the day that is the only thing that we have is the ability to control ourselves. We can’t control other people, places or things.

“Just this once, let it be easy.” ~ Cynthia Lord

To join us on our Free 2022 Summer “Connect & Grow” live calls the 1st Tuesday of each month at 12 pm Eastern time through August 2nd – please click this link https://bit.ly/3xLVnRK to register for the Zoom link.

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” and “I AM WHOLE” Courses https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Are you ready to laugh? This was such a fun and yet, important conversation that Tia and Kim had with Megan. Megan is trying to bring more fun, play and laughter into the world but in particular to the workplace. After working for years in “Corporate America,”  she knew that she had a purpose in life and that she had to take that chance and jump off the proverbial cliff in order to be who she authentically is and to align with her true self. She was tired of wearing the “imposter mask” and decided that the world needed her talent of bringing laughter and fun to the workplace by helping to plan and implement fun meetings as an example. Megan has such an infectious energy that you can not help but to be drawn into her.

"Celebrate your victories… and also celebrate your stumbles, because if you are learning and growing, those are your biggest victories of all. As long as we are learning, we are winning. There is no such thing as failure unless we fail to keep going." ~ Megan Bendtzen

Three takeaways:

1. What steps did Megan take to decide to leave her corporate career? ~ 14 minutes

2. What joke did Megan tell about the mushroom? ~ 20 minutes

3. What was Megan’s message about making mistakes? ~ 30 minutes

To claim Megan’s Free Gift, a fun-o-meter quiz, go to https://bit.ly/TheDoctorofFun

About Megan

Megan Bendtzen is a Speaker, Motivator and Event/Game Host, known for her signature Leadership Development Game Shows.  She has made it her mission to infuse fun back into the corporate mindset so employees are more engaged, energized and happier.

Megan has studied Leadership, Communication, Engagement, Personal Growth and Relationships for over 18 years.  She has worked with thousands of people and delivered hundreds of impactful seminars on these and related topics to companies such as Merck, Marriott, Best Western, VCA Hospitals and others. She is the author of an e-book called "Let's Get Serious About Having Fun" and has been featured on The List TV Show, NBC, Fox 26 Houston, iHeart Radio, The Unstoppable Female Entrepreneur Summit and many other media outlets and podcasts sharing her out-of-the-box ideas and fun tips.

Connect with Megan

Go to https://bit.ly/TheDoctorofFun to connect with her social media

To join us on our Free 2022 Summer “Connect & Grow” live calls the 1st Tuesday of each month at 12 pm Eastern time through August 2nd – please click this link https://bit.ly/3xLVnRK to register for the Zoom link.

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” Course and FREE “I AM WHOLE” Course https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

What do you do whenever people don’t agree with you? What do you do when you are faced with a situation that activates you and you can’t control the situation or the other person? How likely are you to turn inward and put the microscope on yourself? It has been said over and over that we can not control people or situations. We can only control ourselves and our reactions. Kim and Tia talk about the I AM WHOLE Process that they created that helps you go inward and recognize whether you are in the present moment or not and how to take ownership of your part in the situation while tending to your emotional landscape so that you can best show up for yourself and the other and being more aligned with your truest self. If you want to hear more about the I AM WHOLE Process listen to this episode and if you would like to sign up for the free four week course on I AM WHOLE the link is below. It

"We find comfort among those who agree with us, and growth among those who don't." ~ Frank A. Clark

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” and “I AM WHOLE” Courses https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

How often have you said or done something to someone and instantly regretted saying or doing that thing?  If you have a conflict or an argument with another, do you go back and do a repair or do you just “sweep it under the rug” and move on? Kim and Tia talk about the importance of doing a “do over” or a repair to help keep the integrity of a relationship. Kim shares an example of where she said something to her daughter that she instantly regretted and she shares how she used the I AM WHOLE Process to help her regulate and integrate her emotional landscape so that she was able to do a repair with her daughter. To hear more about this take a listen.

“When you forgive, you in no way change the past, but you sure do change the future.” ~Bernard Meltzer

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” and “I AM WHOLE” Courses https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

This conversation with guest speaker Dara Kurtz covered many topics including how to cultivate healthy relationships, dealing with grief and loss, as well as surviving cancer.  Dara was very vulnerable and shared the pain that she went through when she lost her mom at the age of 29 and then later shared the pain that she and her daughters endured when she got cancer at the age of 42.  It was obviously a challenging time for her and her family and she was able to take this experience and turn her life around. She began writing books and created her blog and has become an inspiration to many. She also shared how she cultivated a beautiful relationship with her two daughters. If you want to be inspired this episode will surely do that.

“Listen to your heart. Listen to that pull you might feel inside yourself, and be willing to go down a new path. You never know what you’ll discover or find.” ~Dara Kurtz

Three takeaways:

1. What was your process for grieving the loss of her mom? ~ 9 minutes

2. How did Dara support herself and her girls through cancer? ~14 minutes

3. How do we have healthy and good relationships? ~ 17 minutes

To claim Dara’s Free Gift “” go to: https://crazyperfectlife.com/i-am-my-mothers-daughter/

About Dara:

Dara Kurtz, after being diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of forty-two, left her twenty-year career as a financial advisor to focus on writing, speaking, and podcasting. Today her personal blog, Crazy Perfect Life (www.crazyperfectlife.com), reaches over 200,000 followers. Dara is the author of several books, her most recent being: I am My Mother’s Daughter: Wisdom on Life, Loss, and Love. Dara’s goal is to use her life experiences to help people strengthen their relationships and create more happiness and joy in their everyday lives.

Connect with Dara:

website: www.crazyperfectlife.com

IG: https://www.instagram.com/crazyperflife/

FB: https://www.facebook.com/crazyperfectlife

email: [email protected]

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” and “I AM WHOLE” Courses https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 124

How often do you use food, work, caretaking, alcohol or any other numbing activity to avoid your feelings and to avoid being vulnerable with another? Do you constantly notice that you are trying to avoid being vulnerable either because it feels too scary to be so or you feel that being vulnerable is a sign of weakness? Brene Brown states that when we choose to outrun and outsmart vulnerability and pain we are choosing a life defined by suffering and exhaustion. She also states that learning to “feel those edges” is one of the most worthwhile things we can do.

“I learned that taking the edge off is not rewarding but putting the edge back on is one of the most worthwhile things we can do. Those sharp edges feel vulnerable, but they are also the markers that let us know where we end and others begin.” ~ Brene Brown

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses including our signature FREE “Balancing Your Backpack” and “I AM WHOLE” Courses https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Instagram: @masksoffcommunity

FB Masks Off Community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/masksoffcommunity

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 126