Masks Off: Inner Freedom For People-Pleasers and Perfectionists

Do you find yourself looking outside of yourself to find peace and comfort? Do you wish and want others to make you feel better because you don’t know how to comfort yourself? Or, do you use food or some other substance or behavior to comfort yourself rather than soothing or comforting yourself? It is a skill that we must learn so that we can go inward and soothe and comfort ourselves. It is truly learning how to “dance in the rain.” Learning to self-regulate is a crucial skill to learn. Want to hear more, listen as Kim and Tia discuss this important topic.

“Nothing Can Bring You Peace But Yourself” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses as well including our signature FREE Balancing Your Backpack Course - https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 65

In this episode Kim and Tia share the process of going inward and deconstructing very old patterns. Very often many of us seek outside validation to feel that we are worthy and when we don’t receive that outside validation we can feel unworthy and unlovable. It is so important to learn how to give ourselves the validation that we are worthy just because of who we are and not what we do. The mere fact that we were born and are a part of this world makes us worthy. Where things go wrong is that we receive messages from our caretakers and from culture that we are not worthy and not ok unless we do “x, y or z.”  If you are tired of always seeking validation on the outside and feeling empty from within, then begin to give it to yourself and reclaim your personal power.

“Don’t seek approval. This may be the toughest suggestion for you to follow — and the most important. Whether you’re a teenager seeking approval from your peers, a middle-aged parent seeking the approval of your kids, or a man or woman seeking the approval of a partner, it all amounts to the same thing. You’re giving your personal power away every time you seek validation from someone else for who you are.” – Trish MacGregor

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses as well including our signature FREE Balancing Your Backpack Course - https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 64

In this episode Kim and Tia talk about the antidote when we feel that resistance to stepping into the arena. What can we do when we feel too fearful or too vulnerable to share our heart and our true selves. There are several tools or steps to this antidote and they are discussed in this episode. It must be stated that it is a process and that we need to have compassion for ourselves when we don’t do it perfectly. It is about progress and not perfection. It is messy but when we truly come from our hearts and speak our truth with a loved one it truly feels good.

“As long as you are pure of heart, you speak the truth.” ~ Umar

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses as well including our signature FREE Balancing Your Backpack Course - https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 63

At the start of season 2 Kim and Tia talk about the consequences of putting our masks back on or not fully removing them and playing roles. It can feel suffocating and it can prevent us from being alive and authentic. They do discuss that it can feel and be extremely difficult to be vulnerable and to show up fully authentic because we so often fear rejection and separation. However, when we choose to armor up and protect our heart our hearts can become calcified and we feel “dead” inside. It is a crossroad for sure and a difficult one for sure. Most importantly as you travel this path, it is so crucial to have support even if it is just one other person who can hold you up on this journey.

“I'm exhausted by the idea that everyone is presenting this perfect life.” ~ Luke Goss

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 62

What a year 2020 has been. Kim and Tia take a look back and reflect on all the growth and challenges that the year has brought them. As the quote below says, if we are making mistakes then we are trying new things and learning and growing. If we allow ourselves to see life events as opportunities to grow and learn we can have a perspective of abundance rather than lack and scarcity. When we allow ourselves to look at the yardstick behind us we can see the growth that we have achieved and when we look at life as progress and not perfection it lends itself to a softer way of living life. So here is to you and a new year of mistakes, growth and progress.

“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something.” ~Neil Gaiman

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses as well including our signature FREE Balancing Your Backpack Course - https://masksoff.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 61

In this episode Kim and Tia discuss the importance of embracing our valleys or in other words embracing our pain or discomfort. Life will always have pain because pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.  When we choose to suffer is when we create those Grand Canyons that then become increasingly difficult to climb out of. It can be difficult to recognize or to even accept that we may be co-creating a Grand Canyon by choosing to avoid painful feelings, and that is why it is so crucial to find a person or a group or community that can help support you as you traverse these valleys and climb to the peaks.

“Life is supposed to be a series of peaks and valleys. The secret is to keep the valleys from becoming Grand Canyons.” ~Bernard Williams

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses as well - https://unlocking-authenticity.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 60

Do you feel like life is a constant struggle? Do you feel like you are in a perpetual state of feeling triggered and reactive to life’s events and other people? Kim and Tia continue the conversation that they had a few episodes ago about how life is neutral and it is our histories, our beliefs and our thoughts that keeps us suffering. When we can learn how to walk through the valleys and reach the peaks, we can live a life of more freedom, peace and presence. This does not mean that we are always on the peaks because we will always walk through another valley. This is just a way to incorporate the valleys and the peaks.

“All of life is peaks and valleys. Don't let the peaks get too high and the valleys too low.” ~John Wooden

Go to our Teachable Online School and check out our courses, including our signature FREE Balancing Your Backpack Course - https://unlocking-authenticity.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 59

In the last episode Kim and Tia talked about being in the arena which means showing up and being vulnerable. In this episode they continue the conversation about being in the wilderness. They discuss the struggle of being 100 percent authentic because at times when we are authentic and show our true selves there is a risk of being rejected and like the quote says that belonging is so primal and so necessary that the thought of being rejected or losing someone is terrifying. So instead of being truly authentic, we fit in in order to feel like we belong. To hear more of this conversation and to take a deep dive take a listen.

“Belonging is so primal, so necessary, the threat of losing your tribe or going alone feels so terrifying as to keep most of us distanced from the wilderness most of our lives.“ ~ Brene Brown

Go to our Unlocking Authenticity Teachable School and check out our courses as well - https://unlocking-authenticity.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com 

Facebook: @tiafagancoach 

Instagram: @tiafagancoach 

Email: [email protected]

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com 

Facebook: @unlockyourmindhypnotherapy

Email: [email protected]

Episode 58

How comfortable are you with vulnerability? Do you find it hard to step into the arena and share your truest self with others or do you hide behind a mask for fear of being judged? Kim and Tia discuss what it is like for them to show up and share their truest selves. It can be so hard to show others your deepest fears or your truest feelings because we are so conditioned to push our feelings down and show up as all put together. When we can take the risk and have the courage to step in the arena and be our truest self no matter what that might look like, then we are living life while “daring greatly.” Then we are living life wholeheartedly and to the fullest.

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat." - Theodore Roosevelt

Go to our Unlocking Authenticity Teachable School and check out our courses as well - https://unlocking-authenticity.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com 

Facebook: @tiafagancoach 

Instagram: @tiafagancoach 

Email: [email protected]

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com 

Facebook: @unlockyourmindhypnotherapy

Email: [email protected]

Episode 57

Do you live with presence or do you continually find yourself worrying about the future? Are you able to show up and be yourself with people or do you feel that you have to wear a “mask” when you are around other people. This life as we know it can be gone in an instant. We never know if we have tomorrow so are you living this life to the fullest and showing up as your true self. Are you even being true to yourself and living life the way you want to live your life or are you living it the way you think you are supposed to live your life? If you want to hear more about this topic take a listen as Kim and Tia dive into this conversation.

Life isn’t meant to be lived perfectly…but merely to be LIVED. Boldly, wildly, beautifully, uncertainly, imperfectly, magically LIVED.” ~ Mandy Hale

Go to our Unlocking Authenticity Teachable School and check out our courses as well - https://unlocking-authenticity.teachable.com/courses

To Contact Us:

Masks Off Email: [email protected]

Masks Off YouTube Channel: https://youtube.com/channel/UCaWJfO7ZFd4aYBX3e-clj9Q

Tia Fagan

Website: tiafagan.com

Kim Gross

Website: unlock-yourmind.com

Email: [email protected]

Episode 56