“Why is my wife so angry, distant, or emotional—and how am I supposed to fix myself when everything feels like my fault?”
“Why do I keep messing things up even when I’m trying to get it right?”

In Part 6 of How to Stop Reacting and Take Responsibility for Your Personal Growth, we confront one of the hardest truths of marriage repair: the real enemy isn’t your wife—it’s the unseen adversary exploiting both your weaknesses.

This episode tackles:

• Why your wife’s pain isn’t always your fault—but how you still have work to do

• The danger of forgetting there’s a real enemy behind the chaos

• Why retreating from conflict is not weakness but strategic leadership

• How to start speaking your dreams, plans, and reflections—even when it’s terrifying

• Why most men were never taught to do this—and why that ends now

• How to stop reacting like a victim and start leading like a builder

If you’ve ever felt like your wife is your biggest critic and you can’t win no matter what you try… this episode brings clarity, courage, and a challenge to step into your God-given strength.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/taming-your-dangerous-emotions-and-reclaiming-your-power/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNc4vXsN9VU

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

Why does she keep asking me what’s going on in my head—when I barely know myself?
And why does it feel like everything I say just makes things worse?

If you’ve ever walked away from a conversation with your wife thinking, “I was just trying not to say something stupid…”—this episode is for you.

In Part 5 of How to Stop Reacting and Take Responsibility for Your Personal Growth, Maurice Harker guides men through the practical skill of executing a dignified retreat when emotions flare, and how to train yourself to stay calm, reflect wisely, and communicate your growth.

Discover:

• Why your retreat must be planned and not emotional

• How to prepare “fire drill phrases” that help you walk away with strength

• How to build a plan your wife can trust—not just feel

• Why writing down your reflections isn’t weakness—it’s leadership

• What women are really asking when they say “tell me how you feel”

• How DAR (Discover–Apply–Reflect) isn’t a chore—it’s how men lead their own growth

If your wife is asking, “What’s going on in your head?” and you don’t know how to answer—or worse, if you say nothing—this episode gives you the tools to stop reacting and start leading your transformation.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/if-you-dont-have-the-spirit/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybqzJ039vw4&t=2s

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

“Why won’t she believe I’ve changed?”

You’ve stopped lying. You’re working hard on yourself. You’re doing everything right—but she still doesn’t trust you. She questions your every move, reads fear into your silence, and accuses you of only changing because you got caught.

Welcome to the real work of personal growth.

In Part 4 of How to Stop Reacting and Take Responsibility for Your Personal Growth, Maurice Harker lays out the painful reality of rebuilding credibility in a relationship after betrayal. This episode goes deep into why your wife can’t believe you yet, what you must do to stop reacting, and how to build your emotional maturity one intentional step at a time.

Learn:

• Why you must stop trying to “prove” change—and start becoming it

• The credit score metaphor for rebuilding trust

• How to recognize when the Spirit has left the room

• Why retreating from arguments is not cowardice—it’s strategy

• How to protect the emotional space during hard conversations

• The spiritual science behind environment-building and edifying intimacy

This is the gritty, real-time work of becoming a man who no longer reacts—but leads with integrity and calm strength.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/5-steps-to-rebuilding-trust-after-a-relationship-has-been-traumatized/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5wPvF8YD0w

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

What do you do when you walk into a conversation with your wife feeling calm, ready, and spiritually prepared—only for it to explode in your face? When she unloads years of hurt, calls you a liar, and insists you’ll never change?

This is where most men spiral. This is where Satan gets loud.
And this is where your true growth begins.

In this hard-hitting episode of Memoirs of an LDS Servant Teacher, Maurice Harker explains how to navigate the emotional chaos of early relationship repair—what he calls the “double satanic spin.” You’ll learn how to recognize when the Spirit leaves the room, how to withdraw with dignity, and how to stop mistaking emotional intensity for relationship failure.

You’ll also discover:

• Why your wife’s pain seems so overwhelming (and unrelatable)

• What to do when she psychoanalyzes you mid-argument

• Why staying calm isn’t enough—you need a strategic exit plan

• How to reset your mindset after being emotionally hit

• And why this brutal phase is not the end—it’s just the tryout

Want to read more about this topic? https://www.lifechangingservices.org/we-dont-have-that-in-our-ward-acknowledging-and-loving-lgbtq-members-around-us/

Rather Watch Something? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uDnT9zGnaQE

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

What do you do when your wife says she’ll never trust you again? When she questions your sincerity, your attraction, your honesty—and you’re doing everything you can just to hold it together?

In this powerful episode, Maurice Harker breaks down the emotional chaos men face when their past failures become fuel for doubt in their wives’ hearts. You’ll learn how to respond with grounded strength instead of emotional panic, and why building a self-led personal growth system is the only way forward.

This isn’t about defending yourself—it’s about developing yourself.

Inside this lesson:

• Why her generosity or accusations don’t define your worth

• How to stay calm when you're being psychoanalyzed and misunderstood

• Why personal development must be your own project—not hers

• How to know when you're spiritually and emotionally ready to reconnect

• And what to do when she says, “You’ll never change.”

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/our-support-system/

Rather Watch Something? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nGqGEJbPXDc&t=11s

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

Why does it feel like your wife is constantly sending you stuff to read, fix, change, or apply—and you're still being told you’re not doing enough?

In this episode of Memoirs of an LDS Servant Teacher, Maurice Harker addresses the emotional weight husbands feel when their wives send constant “resources” their way—and how this dynamic creates frustration, resentment, and mental overload.

But more importantly, he explains why relying on her help actually slows your growth down—and how taking full ownership of your personal development is the key to rebuilding trust, leadership, and real healing in your marriage.

If you’re ready to stop reacting and start rising, this is the mindset shift that changes everything.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/adhd-blog-comorbidities/

Rather Watch Something? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y2UuPMNKPnY

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

Why does your wife always push back on your ideas—even when you’re trying to help? Why does it feel like every time you offer a plan, she sees what’s wrong with it?

In this honest and relatable episode, Maurice Harker walks men through the emotional and spiritual science of leadership in marriage—and the frustrating reality of trying to create win-win situations when you feel like she’s always questioning or outmaneuvering you.

You’ll learn why many men feel defeated when their wives seem “smarter,” why that triggers resentment, and why getting spiritually aligned is the secret to bouncing back with confidence and clarity. This episode also introduces the concept of spiritual intimacy—the ability to co-create miraculous solutions together, even when both of you feel stuck.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/french-fry-machine-metaphor/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwGNuY6nNAg

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

Have you ever made what you thought was a solid plan—only to watch your wife poke holes in it, question it, or rewrite the whole thing?

If that left you thinking, “Why do I even try?”, you're not alone.

In this honest and relatable episode, Maurice Harker walks men through the vulnerable experience of trying and failing to lead in marriage—and why those failures hurt more than we admit. You’ll discover why your wife’s feedback isn’t an attack, why a failed plan isn’t proof of failure, and how writing it down might be the secret to finally getting it right.

From comparing planning to skateboarding crashes and dental adjustments to building mutual blueprints in business and marriage, this episode offers realistic strategies for husbands trying to build trust, recover from ego bruises, and create plans their wives can actually get behind.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/rebuilding-trust-in-a-traumatized-relationship-a-spiritual-and-psychological-approach/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5wPvF8YD0w

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

You're working long hours, trying to be responsible, trying to do it all—and still, your wife is upset. She’s drowning in parenting, exhausted from her own responsibilities, and you're both running on fumes. Why does she seem so frustrated with you when you're just trying to keep the family afloat?

In this episode, Maurice Harker guides husbands through one of the most misunderstood struggles in marriage: how being physically present but mentally unavailable can make your wife feel completely alone. Learn why strategic planning isn't just for your job—it’s vital for your marriage, too. Discover how to choreograph your relationship like a team, recover from missteps, and rebuild a system where both partners thrive.

Want to read more about this topic? ⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/sons-of-helaman-the-faith-based-self-mastery-program-transforming-lives/

Rather Watch Something? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RH4C8SiqGGo

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠

Why does your wife seem so upset—about everything? And why does it feel like no matter what you do, she still wants you to fix yourself?

In this eye-opening episode, Maurice Harker walks husbands through a common pain point in marriage: trying to understand a wife's emotional experience without falling into the trap of thinking she's the problem. You'll learn why your wife's pain isn't imaginary, why her personal growth space matters, and how not to "accidentally insult her soul" by trying to fix what you don't yet understand.

Maurice unpacks the delicate (and often hilarious) balance between timing, bonding, and empathy—especially when one spouse wants connection and the other wants quiet spiritual time. This episode is the first in a powerful series to help men stop guessing and start understanding.

Want to read more about this topic? https://www.lifechangingservices.org/gingerbread-man-parable-anger-pain-management/

Rather Watch Something? ⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNc4vXsN9VU

Check out the Marriage Repair Workshops: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.lifechangingservices.org/marriage-repair/⁠