Miserable Retail Slave

Topical, Political content/ the best place to debate social issues/ the last time Tommy was at the gun range/ Hawk weapons/ "If I'm in a stressful situation…like If I know it's happening…then I'm really good at it. But if I, if I have to, uh, but if it's not happening in the moment and I can't, I can't figure out, y'know. It just, it just depends. In the moment, I'm good."/ Dealing with the stress of life/ Resting Hawk Face/ Name your hawk/ A reference to the movie Over the Top/ upgrading your hawk/ the Walmart ensemble/ Tommy wants a Foghorn Leghorn tattoo/ Ka-Powie on your kneecap/ Kelly Ka-Powie/ The flooding Flint River/ Those people that float in kayaks down flooded streets/ Tide pods/ Tommy's world/ soul tattoos…tattooing your soul/ "You don't need the 'full' there"/ "That's what they teach you in comedy writing"/ The Great Comedy Book/ Friendly Dads/ Dad questions/ Tommy thinks honesty is stupid/ The effort it takes to word at a person/ Quality Question/ Saying "fans" is gross/ Meme talk/ It's hard to open, says comedian Tommy/ The Return of Funnel Cloud Charles/ The Charlie Hawk/ Would you rather?/ Be bald or wear a clown wig?/ The problem with being The Flash/ Overwhelmed Flash/ Flash Dad/ Raging against Bones/ Time and Distance/ Two Too Many Randys/ A famous missed connection/ The Man with the Yellow Shoes/ Equal rights, equal blown moments/ "I'm not asking you to marry me, just pod with me"

Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content!

Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya?

Even better, come join our closed Facebook crew and enjoy the insanity. Just search "Miserable Retail Slave" on the Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/groups/832006570279942/

Leave us a 5-star, positive iTunes review...that would be so kind of you! Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miserableretailslavepodcast

Follow Randy on Twitter: https://twitter.com/mretailslave

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

You should most definitely subscribe to the show if you dig what you hear: If you like that iTunes, point your Internet right here: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/miserable-retail-slave/id527775275?mt=2

Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/miserable-retail-slave

If you enjoy grabbing your pods using something else: http://miserableretailslave.libsyn.com/rss

(Episode 191)

Frank and vulnerable/ Extinct Franks/ being particular about public restrooms/ Bathroom peekers/ Meat cutter apprentices/ The Bug Zapper…People just flocked to him/ Offended by Pattis and ok with Franks/ The Red Hat Society/ That one time the Red Hats showed up to Tommy's show as clowns/ Using the handicap stall/ The Tommy Detector/ The opinions of old women/ Fat Tuesday/ Not Live - the Undead Podcast/ Tommy's lingering ankle issues/ Tommy's incredible, spontaneously breaking bones/ Calling your wife, "ma"/ those couples that start to look like each other/ Gender swapping on Facebook/ Hitting The White Trash Double Feature/ Tommy's starless Chucks/ Walmart hairdressers/ The Beloved and Tommy have casino adventures/ When you speak to the manager and she has the same haircut/ Those training stages in Street Fighter II/ Jake "The Quitter" Savage/ Explaining Dort Highway in Flint, Michigan/ Tatted to all extremes/ Break room tattoos/ the Cult of Kitty/ Princess and Queen on the collarbone/ An Arby's kitchen romance/ Randy's resting b**ch face/ "This is what this is all about: awful things"/ Granny Jessa/ The cast of gas station characters/ El Silencio/ gas station podcast: Pumps Are Off/ Dexter from "Let's Get Drunk and Talk Comics" and Do You Even Comic Book? joins the show/ Living in caves/ The acquired taste/ RIP Couch Party Crew/ What are you drinking?/ Discussing livestreaming/ Interviewing Dexter…why does he like comics?/ Randy's comic tale/ The Do You Even Comic Book community/ How comic fans behave on the Internet/ That time Tommy got yelled at for telling a joke/ Things that are considered offensive/ Creating comic book storylines/ Quailman/ How "Do you even comic book?" came about/ The Dexter Show

Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content!

Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya?

Even better, come join our closed Facebook crew and enjoy the insanity. Just search "Miserable Retail Slave" on the Facebook!

https://www.facebook.com/groups/832006570279942/

Leave us a 5-star, positive iTunes review...that would be so kind of you! Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miserableretailslavepodcast

Follow Randy on Twitter: https://twitter.com/mretailslave

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

You should most definitely subscribe to the show if you dig what you hear: If you like that iTunes, point your Internet right here: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/miserable-retail-slave/id527775275?mt=2

Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/miserable-retail-slave

If you enjoy grabbing your pods using something else: http://miserableretailslave.libsyn.com/rss

(Episode 190)

This weird world/ Uber is a weird thing/ An Uber co-pilot/ Randy wakes up seething/ A quaking/ Old Spice and Apathy/ The Panty Man/ a sweet little pervert package/ counting his panties/ The first live show/ "How check that"/ How long until girls start getting plastic surgery to look like their favorite Snapchat filters?/ Who Wants to Be a Snapchat? - the game show/ a Hello Kitty neck tattoo/ A masters in the selfie/ Have some selfie steem/ You can't send a double message/ It's like trying to reheat fries/ All the inside jokes/ Getting the ribs for a very long time/ World's Biggest Scrublord/ Flashback to college/ The College Tale of Thin Lizzy/ The Disaster of the Live Show/ Tommy's injured ankle/ "Come meet my stepfather backhand, it's about time"/ Andrea/ "You're not Howard Stern, buddy."/ Horny goat weed/ A call in from TRB from "Welcome to Rantyville"/ Tommy is a sofa/ Epic Fail Guys/ David the Producer from The Unwritable Rant calls in/ Tommy's got a show coming up in Chicago/ David's baritone voice and karaoke choice/ bad water, bad Internet, bad podcast/ Bert Kreischer on The Unwritable Rant/ Bert is responsible/ Tommy almost fell out of a 20 story window one time/ We invite Juliette Miranda and David the Producer onto Episode 200/ The man with the boll weevil face/ carved from meatloaf/ Nick from Epic Film Guys hates our framerate/ Missed Connections/ Seeking a woman to have a baby with on Craigslist/ "He'll email you sex back"/ "You're a 110% beautiful!"/ Buzz balls/ We're the Titanic and we hit the iceberg/ Randy retires

Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya? Even better, come join our closed Facebook crew and enjoy the insanity. Just search "Miserable Retail Slave" on the Facebook! Leave us a 5-star, positive iTunes review...that would be so kind of you! Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miserableretailslavepodcast

Follow Randy on Twitter: https://twitter.com/mretailslave

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

You should most definitely subscribe to the show if you dig what you hear: If you like that iTunes, point your Internet right here: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/miserable-retail-slave/id527775275?mt=2

Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/miserable-retail-slave

If you enjoy grabbing your pods using something else: http://miserableretailslave.libsyn.com/rss

(Episode 189)

Band in turmoil/ "No Responsibility" Thompson/ Being in a band/ Alcoholic telepathic abilities/ The trials and tribulations of the acoustic guitar/ Dark Reflections/ Becoming the awkward guitar guy at the party/ There's something about a beer and a cigarette/ What if Bono actually saved the world?/ Tommy's really mad at u2 again/ The ultimate love song/ Ed Sheeran/ a more violent Three Stooges/ Stan Lee…the pervert of the week/ "He shouldn't say that out loud"/ drunk as funk/ the irony of Tommy's love for "Roseanne"/ Dan Connor = based dad ever/ The weirdest lunch break/ The bloody hand/ "Carpenter jeans are my rebel flag, bro…My carpenter jeans are the new punk rock"/ These teens and their obsession with slime/ Answering a question from "Just the Worst" podcast/ Nuclear proliferation in Korea/ #MiserableRetailSunday/ the one man street time for "Sorry in Advance"/ Drowning in his feels/ taco makeup/ Tommy's favorite author/ The Goosebumps Game/ The haunted mirror/ the fright shakes/ Can't handle that stress/ The Ghost That Said No/ Robert Lee Stine

Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya? Even better, come join our closed Facebook crew and enjoy the insanity. Just search "Miserable Retail Slave" on the Facebook! Leave us a 5-star, positive iTunes review...that would be so kind of you! Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miserableretailslavepodcast Follow Randy on Twitter: https://twitter.com/mretailslave Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy You should most definitely subscribe to the show if you dig what you hear: If you like that iTunes, point your Internet right here: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/miserable-retail-slave/id527775275?mt=2

Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/miserable-retail-slave

If you enjoy grabbing your pods using something else: http://miserableretailslave.libsyn.com/rss

(Episode 188)

A good sarcasm/ Synesthesia for sarcasm/ The taste of sarcasm/ Tommy's cold pizza score/ Tommy loves The Bachelor/ The foremost expert on The Bachelor/ Punctual Tommy's Early Bird Problems/ A Fat Dad Ensemble takes shape/ Vinyl/ The Weather/ Christmas Town, USA/ Life as a Hellraiser Puzzlebox/ Your rap name is "Lil" + the first thing you bought in 2018/ The Big Something/ The chunky d-bag of comedy/ The Reverse Bucket List/ Scuba diving/ Beware of the shrimp poop vein/ Swimming/ Would you ever jetpack like The Rocketeer?/ Lack of coordination/ Missed Connections/ Pandas in captivity/ COULD THE TERMINATOR EAT PIZZA?/ Tommy watches Black Mirror/ the Tonight app/ Is it served with a doofus?/ The girl with the go go gadget arms/ Tommy sounds like a woman on the phone/ New releases on Netflix/ Batman/ Tommy likes The Punisher/ Three Cream, No Sugar/ Be a man like Jon Bernthal/ Break my nose/ Caddyshack/ Sharknado/ Pretentious Jerry/ What are you kids even reading?/ comedians and groupies/ Fodcasts

Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya? Even better, come join our closed Facebook crew and enjoy the insanity. Just search "Miserable Retail Slave" on the Facebook! Leave us a 5-star, positive iTunes review...that would be so kind of you! Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miserableretailslavepodcast Follow Randy on Twitter: https://twitter.com/mretailslave Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy You should most definitely subscribe to the show if you dig what you hear: If you like that iTunes, point your Internet right here: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/miserable-retail-slave/id527775275?mt=2

Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/miserable-retail-slave

If you enjoy grabbing your pods using something else: http://miserableretailslave.libsyn.com/rss

(Episode 187)

With special guests, Nick from "Epic Film Guys" and Tom from "Jake and Tom Conquer The World"

Tommy Impressions/ This Walmart/ Public restroom follies/ Corpse dung/ a urinal opportunist/ Tommy is out sick/ Twitter's favorite son/ Randy has a beef with Tom Coe/ The Cupid Shuffle/ Strong names/ Smitty/ Tommy's in Indianapolis/ "God Hates Jake and Tom"/ the timeline of Tommy's sickness/ Fire throat/ Nick, the Feelings Stalin/ The Lone Star in this Bleak World/ Tommy's weird hair/ Facebook stalking and unlocking the secrets of the universe/ When Alan Moore Attacks/ A transcontinental curse/ "Someone spat on my bike today"/ A new tagline for Facebook/ LIT/ Tom Coe got maced/ The Room/ Summoning the spirit of Neil Gaiman/ Randy doesn't like The Sandman/ Asking an Epic Film Guy if Die Hard is a Christmas movie/ the Century Club/ Watching the Star Wars Holiday Special for the first time/ Summarizing Star Wars/ Reindeer boob/ The RestauRANT podcast/ Gluttony Shirts/ Solutions to becoming a morning person/ the story of how Nick met his wife/ ending this year the same as last year/ online dating nonsense/ Jim Carrey/ Jim Carrey paints/ "I can't handle opinions 2017"/ Funnel Cloud Charles returns/ "Sorry in Advance" podcast/ Missed connections/ Nick's first date with his wife/ Love is a warm hand

The boss/ A Salvation Army bell ringing incident/ The Salvation Sweeties/ An opportunist/ The worst bathroom ever/ 'open sesame'/ the perfect Mentos opportunity/ Tommy wants to believe in a flat Earth/ Fat dads/ Shout out to the Christmas parties/ Tommy's awkward work Christmas party/ Korn ruined Christmas songs/ Losing your two front teeth/ Tommy's a pretty good hockey player/ The Knuckle puck and Mighty Duck facts/ Know your Creek/ Writing a Christmas song/ Tom Coe Tuesday/ a retail paparazzi/ Portraits of Pain: The Tears of Retail/ Honeymooning/ The Great Tom Gatsby and the Mystery of the Haunted Hotel/ The Lady in Blue/ Tommy's possessed house/ Ghost Sex/ a Jesus finger waggle/ Tommy's growing a wizard beard/ Drinking eggnog for the first time/ "How would that be with alcohol?"/ Keaton the bullied kid and his video/ Bleakworld/ Quit watching The Walking Dead and Walking Dead spoilers/ Being all depressed/ Helping Grant, the Rage Boy/ Online dating: The Return/ Meeting a Pro Beer Pong player/ The World Series of Beer Pong/ Being in a funk/ On Level 36/ Advice on how to get through the mornings/ Can I get some street endorphins?/ Podcast shout outs: King Rat, Pop! Goes The Metal, Just the Worst podcast/ Why Randy shouldn't get a tattoo/ The Tattoo Advisor/ Pokey > Gumby/ Things people hate about podcasts

Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya? Even better, come join our closed Facebook crew and enjoy the insanity. Just search "Miserable Retail Slave" on the Facebook! Leave us a 5-star, positive iTunes review...that would be so kind of you! Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miserableretailslavepodcast Follow Randy on Twitter: https://twitter.com/mretailslave Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy You should most definitely subscribe to the show if you dig what you hear: If you like that iTunes, point your Internet right here: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/miserable-retail-slave/id527775275?mt=2 Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/miserable-retail-slave If you enjoy grabbing your pods using something else: http://miserableretailslave.libsyn.com/rss (Episode 185)

This time, Randy and Tommy get real nostalgic as they talk about childhood movies that impacted them. The list includes Batman (1989), Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, The Wizard, The Monster Squad and more.

The guys also talk about how the holiday season can be the most horrible time of year for retail workers everywhere. Brothers in Retail, we're all in this together.

Randy and Tommy also get political as they discuss net neutrality. Plus, hear the story behind Tommy's vampire heart tattoo, how Tommy's marriage is going, and ask the important question: how does Mario's raccoon tail make him fly?

Look to the classics/ Bowie and The Little Drummer Boy/ The most horrible time of year for our Brothers in Retail!/ Showing the name of the show/ Those work problems/ You gotta throw a big fuss/ The dark meat/ Republicans love the white turkey meat/ The world's pickiest fat kid/ Holiday season is like Supermarket Sweep/ The hate of confrontation/ Things Tommy is terrible at/ Those Salvation Army soldiers/ Tommy thinks dating is stupid/ That drug called marriage/ Tommy the hunter/ Provide for your family/ Future headliner, Tommy Thompson/ Tommy's dumb website/ Net Neutrality/ Let's Yahoo it/ All those search engines/ Taking a radio station job/ The Idiots of Idiot Mountain/ Eavesdropping on convos/ "She sure has gotten fat"/ Tommy's Canadian impressions/ Nostalgic movie memories/ A vampire heart tattoo?/ Shout out to "The Story Behind" podcast/ Randy the horrible conversationalist/ What's the first movie you remember seeing the the theater?/ The only two videos in school/ Willow/ Seeing Snakes on a Plane/ Sometimes edited versions are better/ The horror of Judge Doom/ Little Monsters/ Tommy sings the Monster Squad theme song/ Seeing Batman 1989/ Jesus Chicken/ Learning about sex in grade 1/ Jenny and the Hot Licks/ Mario's raccoon tail and the horror of flying raccoons/ Growing up on Jean-Claude Van Damme and Steven Seagal

This week, Randy witnesses an epic attempt at a public apology from a man who did a woman wrong. Hear all about this panicked Romeo's plywood apology and whether or not it could possibly work.

Do ever have someone repeat the same annoying question to you every single day? That's the problem that has been plaguing Randy lately.

There are perverts in Hollywood. Have you heard about this? The guys share their thoughts on Louis CK, Harvey Weinstein, and the other assorted Pervs of the Week.

Tommy's big day came and went. It's been talked about for months, but it's time to finally hear about how Tommy's wedding went down. You will believe a man can spontaneously combust.

What do you know about The Punisher? To honor The Punisher series on Netflix, a game is played on the show: Punisher villain, indie rapper, or urban legend.

That's the theme of the show this week: urban legends. The guys talk about urban legends from their small towns as well as state specific legends. They also talk about creepypastas like Slenderman and Polybius and attempt to turn Tommy into a new urban legend to frighten the masses.

Jesus take the wheel/ A Roadside Attraction/ 'ANN I STILL HEART YOU'/ Mister The Beloved/ Introducing the Local Relationship Expert, Tommy/ A Plywood Apology's success rate/ I could barely even get one girl interested/ Happy Wife, Happy Life/ "It's your boy"/ Do you ever have someone repeat the same question to you every single day?/ Ski to Live/ Friends are the people who are there to tell you that you're weird/ Tommy's continuing life story and how he gained childhood friends/ The Party Guy/ A baby named Robert/ Louis CK, Harvey Weinstein, and the Pigs of Hollywood/ Can we just have one pervert a week?/ Tommy's married with a million problems/ Tommy's wedding/ A Pee Wee Herman Wedding/ The Tan Avenger/ Tommy's wedding jitters/ Tommy's three days of maturity/ Honeymoons and Hawaii/ Geeks Worldwide/ Everything is serious business and nothing is funny any more/ What do you know about The Punisher?/ Avenging your parents in different ways/ Game: Punisher Villain, Indie Rapper, or Urban Legend/ Leave it to Delaware/ The Bandage Man of Cannon Beach, Oregon/ Supernatural Meets Scooby Doo/ Seeing a woman with no face in public/ Have you seen those people who get their face eaten by chimps?/ Walking Sam/ Slenderman and more urban legends/ Small town urban legends/ Tommy had a wild Goonies adventure/ Tinfoil Tiffany and the Fatty Vengeance Squad/ creepypastas and Internet urban legends/ turning Tommy into an urban legend/ Polybius/ Ben Drowned/ Colorado: Riverdale Road/ The Curse of Lake Lanier/ Remembering Goosebumps by RL Stine/ The Ghost Next Store/ Hell Bridge/ The Bunny Man Bridge of Virginia/ Homey the Clown,,,the mean one

Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya? Even better, come join our closed Facebook crew and enjoy the insanity. Just search "Miserable Retail Slave" on the Facebook! Leave us a 5-star, positive iTunes review...that would be so kind of you! Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miserableretailslavepodcast

Follow Randy on Twitter: https://twitter.com/mretailslave Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy You should most definitely subscribe to the show if you dig what you hear: If you like that iTunes, point your Internet right here: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/miserable-retail-slave/id527775275?mt=2

Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/miserable-retail-slave

If you enjoy grabbing your pods using something else: http://miserableretailslave.libsyn.com/rss (Episode 183)

Real life vampire scares/ March for vampire rights/ those magical phones/ That time Randy saw a flying vampire man as a kid/ Halloween episode/ love of candy corn/ Tommy gets excited for Milk Duds/ Such a sexy neanderthal/ chasing those fears/ childhood fears/ Remembering being born/ Do you believe in the afterlife/ The most snarky grasshopper/ reincarnation/ Matt-Aid/ Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark/ Garden Toes/ girls and chokers/ A Nightmare on Elm Street and the origins of Freddy Krueger/ Freddy vs Jason/ The worst Halloween costumes/ wearing a coat over your costume/ Tweety/ Embarking a whole nerd journey of excellence/ getting the costume ribs/ The worst 5th grade costume ever/ Dough boys/ Listeners admit their worst Halloween costumes/ Wearing black every day/ Plastic GI Joe Apocalypse Now/ Our Top 5 favorite horror movies/ 1950s "The Fly"/ The Conjuring/ "they deal with devil or grrrr"/ What made '80s horror movies the best/ Near Dark/ Sharp Teeth Christopher Walken

Visit the Patreon page at Patreon.com/MiserableRetailSlave and get access to exclusive content! Call The Miserable Hotline!!! (810) 328-3826 "LIKE" us on the Facebook, would ya? Even better, come join our closed Facebook crew and enjoy the insanity. Just search "Miserable Retail Slave" on the Facebook! Leave us a 5-star, positive iTunes review...that would be so kind of you!

Follow us on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/miserableretailslavepodcast

Follow Randy on Twitter: https://twitter.com/mretailslave

Intro: "Hard Times" by Dan "D-Boy" Amboy Check out his music: https://soundcloud.com/dan-amboy

You should most definitely subscribe to the show if you dig what you hear: If you like that iTunes, point your Internet right here: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/miserable-retail-slave/id527775275?mt=2

Stitcher: http://www.stitcher.com/podcast/miserable-retail-slave

If you enjoy grabbing your pods using something else: http://miserableretailslave.libsyn.com/rss

(Episode 182)