Monster Squad Minute

Monster Squad Minute episodes:

• 11.07.2018

  Minute 82 -The Real Monster Hunter, Right Here

  Midnight! End of the world, remember? No? Oh, well never mind then. But it's definitely the end of the credits, which means we are on the final minute of Monster Squad! The only appropriate way to close out such an...

  
• 11.06.2018

  Minute 81 - What Does the Girl Feel About All This?

  One of our most requested guests,Patrick's Sister herself Lisa Fuller joins us to reminisce about filming the movie, what the experience of its resurgence in popularity has been like, why Patrick's Sister has no first name, and what was on...

  
• 11.05.2018

  Minute 80 - A Certain Weird Creep

  Crystal Beth returns, armed with forbidden knowledge of what's actually happening in the movie! Does she like it? Does she still think Dracula's costume looks cheap? Plus, Andrew gets to talk abut Star Trek again, and we ponder how...

  
• 11.02.2018

  Minute 79 - The Other Del Toro

  Makeup Artist Zoltan sends Justin and Andrew off into a tangent on creepy 80s kids movies with creepy adult themes, and also Dracula's Dog. We also talk about the best props from the movie, Justin goes straight for the...

  
• 11.01.2018

  Minute 78 - Schumachernipples

  Justin returns, and weighs in on Star Trek/Monster Squad, argues in favour of a continuing Crenshaw family unit, and ponder if the Archies or the cast of Saved by the Bell would've done as well vs Drac and the gang....

  
• 10.31.2018

  Minute 77 - The Frankenstore

  Anthony returns once more to teach us the difference between rap and new jack swing, talk about other movies lucky enough to end with a rap that recounts the movie you just saw, and try to make heads ot tails...

  
• 10.30.2018

  Minute 76 - Creepy Baseball Nickname

  Anthony Murphy is pitch-hitting for Justin once more as we talk about these army guys are Eugene wrote to, and figure out why the heck they showed up anyway. Also in this episode, bullies DJ and Derek try to worm...

  
• 10.29.2018

  Minute 75 - Star Trek vs Dracula

  Justin has been sucked into limbo, so Anthony Murphy from No Time for Heroics returns to help us in the aftermath of the battle between good and evil. We ponder the merits or lack thereof of Gilmore Girls, what...

  
• 10.26.2018

  Minute 74 - Scraps is My Co-Pilot

  Ainsley's back one more time as we call wrap on the Frankenstein Monster. Justin wonders what happened to the amulet after the whole limbo thing. Andrew wonders if Event Horizon is worth re-watching. We ask the tough questions about limbo,...

  
• 10.25.2018

  Minute 73 - Nom Nom Nom

  Justin, Andrew and special guest Ainsley all get devoured by the vortex to limbo, along with most of the set and cast.  We see Dracula die for the maybe third and fourth time in the last half of the movie,...

  
• 10.24.2018

  Minute 72 - The Impaler Becomes Impaled

  This episode Phoebe blew a hole in limbo and sucked away our audio with it! So after a catastrophic equipment failure, Andrew has pieced back together the episode into a shambling patchwork mockery of a man that shows up...

  
• 10.23.2018

  Minute 71 - This Wasn't in Stoker's Original Text

  Dracula uses the force on Scary German Guy, and then calls Phoebe a bad word. Ainsley helps us figure out what the heck age group this movie is for.   “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI) Published By Reservoir Media Management,...

  
• 10.22.2018

  Minute 70 - A Faustian Dealio

  Ainsley Hawthorn joins us once again for what may be, if not the best single minute in any movie ever done in the movies by minutes format, certainly the best of this particular film. Justin settles the eternal question of...

  
• 10.19.2018

  Minute 69 - Horace is Not a Doormat

  We take a deep dive into the movie and get a sneak peak at the Squad Doc Wolfman's got Nards as André Gower joins us one last time to wax philosophical on the significance of the entire film. Plus Justin...

  
• 10.18.2018

  Minute 68 - Rimshot

  We're in virgin territory with Monster Squad star André Gower asks why having sex disqualifies you from being able to save the world, how incredible the death of the Wolfman is, and the possible origins of Wolfcop. Plus, André names...

  
• 10.17.2018

  Minute 67 - What Became of Rudy's Bow

  We sing the praises of Ryan Lambert's vulnerable portrayal of the unstoppable killing machine Rudy Halloran and also talk about what songs were on the mixtape he made Lisa Fuller. André Gower confirms that the treehouse was full of pornography....

  
• 10.16.2018

  Minute 66 - The Wolfman Diet

  Squadmaster André Gower is back to talk about how hard it is to hit an actor in a Wolfman outfit with a bat, how great Ryan Lambert i as spit taking, and the direct line between Monster Squad's Gillman, Predator,...

  
• 10.15.2018

  Minute 65 - Oh Crap, I Got Shot as a Bat

  The leader of the Squad, Sean Crenshaw himself, André Gower joins us just in time for him to do a sick karate roll as Del shoots a Dracula out of the air while driving a station wagon.  At least...

  
• 10.12.2018

  Minute 64 - Every Time Patrick Speaks a Fairy Dies

  One last time, Shawn Robare of Branded in the 80s returns to help us figure out who exactly the virgin in this situation is, and also whatever the heck happened with that third Bride of Dracula. “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416...

  
• 10.11.2018

  Minute 63 - Burger King, Frog Brothers, and the Gilmore Girls

  Shawn Robare is back to help us figure out if Del and Emily can really make this marriage thing work after this (they can't) what makes a successful marriage (defeating Dracula) and what to see when you visit the Gilmore...

  
• 10.10.2018

  Minute 62 - The Untimely Death of Richard Sapir

  Shawn Robare is with us as the the black guy is the first to die. Del weighs the paperwork of killing a guy in a Dracula costume in cold blood. Andrew drops some bombs from the script, but not like......

  
• 10.09.2018

  Minute 61 - All of the Non-Sentient Things Get Hurt

  Shawn Robare of Branded in the 80s is back to witness Dracula take apart the American Dream. Big cars? Destroy 'em. White picket fence? Drive over it. Family unit? Divorce!  Plus: Duncan Regehr starts the twenty minutes that made him...

  
• 10.08.2018

  Minute 60 - A Literal Deathmobile

  Monster master Shawn Robare of Branded in the 80's joins us to present more evidence that Phoebe is the most useful member of the Squad,  wonder what Dracula's credit rating is like vis a vis automotive purchases, and hits at...

  
• 10.03.2018

  Your Halloween Mixtape - A Monster Squad Minute Special Assignment

  NEW MINUTES NEXT WEEK! But first, tired of hosting a Halloween party with only Thriller and Monster Mash on repeat as music? We talk about how to create the best Halloween mixtape to seasonally gloom up even the most ebullient...

  
• 04.20.2018

  Minute 59 - The Friggin' Mummy

  Dan McCoy of the Flop House is here once more to reveal which is his favorite monster, and also talk about Shawn's excitable bowels. Rudy attempts to SWAT the monsters, and the mummified remains of Kantanka-Ra are surprisingly agile. Plus,...

  
• 04.19.2018

  Minute 58 - Glowing in the Presence of Virgins

  The Squad decides it's going to visit Gilmore Girls, while Dan McCoy from the Flop House returns to the show.  We discuss a really sweet Christian joke, Phoebe once again saving the world, and what's up with Scary German...

  
• 04.18.2018

  Minute 57 - Dracula vs The Noid

  Dan's back to help us navigate the perils of nostalgia, and try and figure out if things wouldn't have gone better if Shawn had just left the amulet where found it surrounded by crosses and garlic. We swap some weaponized pizza...

  
• 04.17.2018

  Minute 56 - The Importance of Poltergeist

  We welcome back Dan McCoy from the Flop House as the movie fails the monster test. We ponder the proliferation of secret passages, the cycle of nostalgia, and the film career of Fred Dekker.   “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416...

  
• 04.16.2018

  Minute 55 - The Nards Minute

  Dan McCoy joins us from the Flop House podcast to talk about the line you know even if you've never seen this movie. We hypothesize about the wolfman reproductive system. We also take a deep dive into some deleted scenes...

  
• 04.13.2018

  Minute 54 - OscarsSoWet

  Once more onto the treehouse, Anthony from No Time for Heroics joins us to point out how woefully underprepared to fight Dracula these guys are. Shawn inadvertently agrees with the Horace-Patrick plan of leaving this to the police.  We...

  
• 04.12.2018

  Minute 53 - The Etymology of Welp

  Anthony reveals his one childhood wish was just for a single crate of dynamite. Justin and Andrew back away slowly. Dracula takes revenge on Van Helsing's wall for blowing up his walls in the prologue. Everyone else wants pizza.  ...

  
• 03.28.2018

  Minute 52 - I'm Big Bird's Teddy Bear

  The Short Circuit and Inhumanoids references from earlier in the week just weren't enough 80s, so we're gonna have an in depth discussion about Square One with Anthony Murphy. Also Patrick's Sister turns the tables on the dastardly Squaddies, at...

  
• 03.27.2018

  Minute 51- It's Like Nads, But You're Putting an R in There

  Anthony's back as Patrick' sister gets a skeevy proposition. We discuss what we think her name might be, and actress Lisa Fuller herself provides the best answer. “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI) Published By Reservoir Media...

  
• 03.26.2018

  Minute 50 - Inhumanoids vs Visionaries

  Anthony Murphy of No Time for Heroics rejoins us to talk 80s Steves and their 80s Steve cars, Justin does a deep dive into obscure 80s toys, Andrew does a deep dive into Short Circuit references. “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir...

  
• 03.23.2018

  Minute 49 - Werewolf Squats

  Once more Crystal Beth is helping us out by explaining squatty werewolves. We talk practical effects, transformation scenes, and Andrew's favorite minute of the movie (maybe).   “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI) Published By Reservoir Media Management, Inc. All Rights...

  
• 03.22.2018

  Minute 48 - It's Like Stefan Urquelle

  Del and Sapir rap about creepy cars. Crystal Beth and Andrew both confess that they always wanted a hearse. We all begin to suspect that Del isn't a very good cop.    “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI) Published By Reservoir...

  
• 03.21.2018

  Minute 47 - Dime-Store Dracula

  Crystal Beth is introduced to who she describes as a "dime-store, Woolworth's Dracula". We discuss the logistics of the Mummy going to the drug store.   “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI) Published By Reservoir Media Management, Inc. All Rights Reserved....

  
• 03.20.2018

  Minute 46 - There Might've Been Boobs on It

  Crystal Beth returns (as does Justin) to enjoy more Rock Until You Drop montage, and witness Rudy supplying the Frankenstein Monster with pornography.   “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI) Published By Reservoir Media Management, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Used By...

  
• 03.19.2018

  Minute 45 - Born Dead

  MxM Maven and host of The Fifth Eleminute Crystal Beth is on the show, and she's never seen nor really heard of Monster Squad! So like most people really.  Crystal tells us what she thinks is going on as...

  
• 03.16.2018

  Minute 44 - They Put Jeepers Everywhere

  For one final time, Ralph Attanasia is up in the treehouse for Dracula being a little too sure of himself, Shawn's weird decorating style, and the all-important beginning of the awesome 80s music montage!     “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416...

  
• 03.15.2018

  Minute 43 - He Looks a Little Ghoulies

  Ralph from Cake Boss returns to help us figure out if these kids are monster racist, how useful a good Igor would be right now, and how much Justin just can't stand those pesky millenials on his lawn. PLUS: A...

  
• 03.14.2018

  Minute 42 - The Monster Peeps a Mate

  We're mid-week with Ralph Attanasia is back to figure out why no one is telling an adult now that the real monsters have appeared, and the joy of terrible Ben Cooper-style Halloween costumes. “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI) Published By...

  
• 03.13.2018

  Minute 41- The Phoebe-Jeebies

  Ralph from Cake Boss puts out an argument that we should be calling this monster Frankenstein anyway as Shawn goes walking with the dead man over his shoulder. Andrew wonders what you would ask a dead guy if you had...

  
• 03.12.2018

  Minute 40 - There is a Franklingstein Right Here

  Ralph Attanasia from Cake Boss arrives at the same time as the Frankenstein Monster. Plus, Phoebe has a potty mouth, Horace goes dumpster diving, Rudy is so over it, and Justin and Andrew are painfully, painfully Canadian.   “Monster...

  
• 03.09.2018

  Minute 39 - Blowing a Hole in Dumbo

  Kevin Woolridge is back one more time to see Shawn trying to wrangle this bunch of jokers with a deadline looming. Rudy takes a sip of delicious Pepsi.   “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI) Published By Reservoir Media Management, Inc....

  
• 03.08.2018

  Minute 38 - Just a Movie About Monsters

  Kevin Woolridge returns to help us try to plumb the depths of Scary German Guy's motivations and tackle the most(?) controversial scene in the movie as we discover that he is a holocaust survivor.   “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI)...

  
• 03.07.2018

  Minute 37 - Dammit St. Augustine!

  Kevin Woolridge helps us figure out the theology of limbo and why we're sending all these monsters and Van Helsings over there. Plus, Andrew's pet peeves about Superman being vulnerable to magic, and Justin is holding for the fart joke....

  
• 03.06.2018

  Minute 36 - Wherewolfwithal

  Kevin's back to help us try and parse out all this amulet mythology in Van Helsing's diary, taking us back to original sin, the nature of Good and Evil, and the forces of both darkness and Dracness.     “Monster...

  
• 03.05.2018

  Minute 35 - Everything's Coming Up Horace

  Cartoonist and thespian Kevin Woolridge joins us to try and translate this Van Halen diary, parse out Scary German Guy's decor choices, and Andrew goes deeper down the Faust theory of Draculas.    “Monster Mash” ©Reservoir 416 (BMI) Published By...

  
• 02.26.2018

  Robot/Alien/Demon Squad - A Monster Squad Minute Special Assignment

  It's been so long... so very long... and now Andrew and Justin are back in the treehouse getting ready for more Monster Squad Minutes next week! But before we get there, we're talking about other possible Monster Squad-esque monster mashes using...