On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. There's a lot of action on the carpet.

2. I can steer the car with my bellybutton.

1. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.

On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. I have it in my hands right now.

2. You can't hit the hold with your foot.

1. I don't remember much of what happened. That's a good thing considering what they did to you.

On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. I want the table to be decorated with food.

2. People are pooping in it.

1. I for one welcome our drunk robot overlords.

On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. Forgot about Oreos.

2. An outhouse on surfboards.

1. Could you get it in the butt?

On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. I'm Cliff Ingram tomorrow. Who am I today?

2. Torn hands and a missing screw.

1. I plugged the power strip into itself.

On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. Beat through the blubber.

2. Tastes like burning toenail.

1. The Bringer of Music.

On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. A record that will never be broken.

2. Don't want the probing.

1. Everybody is up on top of each other having fun.

On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. Wild Turkey - and not the alcohol kind.

2. That's not a snake - that's poop.

1. If I have to take bear spray to the outhouse I'm not going.

On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. A slow ride to insanity.

2. Pooping on the knuckle.

1. A very aggressive biter.

On this Official Weed and Cliff Podcast:

3. Insurance for your pants.

2. Pus-filled bumps.

1. You can't borrow Cliff Ingram's swimsuit.