Friend Crush with Amber Akilla

never argue with a man for free


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youtube episode: https://youtu.be/bJ1Ow4RFuW4

the irony of me filming this a week before that sh*k video oop at least you know i practice what i preach hehe

you life and your journey is for you to own. other people can disagree and say you're problematic but even then, no one is going to be strong-armed into a better version of themselves. even the most problematic people from your point of view need space to evolve and work through being a product of their environment and conditioning so they can take accountability and choose to change. doesn't mean its my or your responsibility to hold their hand through it, its just that arguing usually exacerbates a problem more than it provides a resolve. do you want to be right or happy???

00:00

01:37 - define the terms

01:43 - never argue with a MAN for free

03:00 - what is love

04:23 - love exists as an action - separate to the culture of romance

05:10 - ‘never’

05:38 - ‘free’

06:31 - ‘argue’ - argument vs conversation

07:58 - types of communication

discourse, dialogue, debate, diatribe

09:14 - engaging in bad faith

10:41 - value

12:41 - walking away or changing the dynamic

13:25 - argument loop

13:56 - let them yap

14:10 - how to get out of an argument with your dignity in tact

15:03 - break the pattern today or the loop will continue tomorrow

15:42 - habit stacking

16:03 - changing response to triggers

16:43 - don't underestimate how important your validation is to other people

15:57 - people treat you with the grace they treat themselves

19:06 - fight or flight activation

19:46 - witholding your response

20:25 - being demure and mindful but not defensive

21:38 - hypocognition

23:06 - bracketing

23:53 - accept that some relationships are just limited

25:29 - you are not responsible for changing other people’s perception of reality if they aren’t ready

26:39 - reclaim and redirect your energy

27:57 - represent yourself rather than waiting for permission

28:35 - presenting something vs arguing about it

29:02 - trying to present new ideas/perspectives

30:43 - when they start a fight with you because they can’t handle their reaction to what you said

30:57 - when arguing might be beneficial

32:00 - when i might care what people think

33:47 - daily affirmations

34:17 - make sure you have a life

34:25 - pre-training so when you are triggered you are less likley to take the bait

...more
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Friend Crush with Amber AkillaBy Amber Akilla

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