New Ways New You ( Tendrils of Grief- Life After Grief)

Susan welcomes Heather Dempsey to today's episode. She is an emotional health coach and Mentor for life and business. Heather is a cat-loving foodie, personal development coach and self-care enthusiast who has helped hundreds of anxious and overwhelmed individuals and service-based entrepreneurs create radical emotional and mindset transformations so that they thrive. She supports her clients — from feeling hopeless, unhappy, and stressed, as if life would never going to be any different from what it has been — to actually feeling optimistic, like anything is possible, energized, and confident they are capable of having everything they desire as they've never experienced in their entire life or business before.

Key Takeaways:

• Heather talks about the loss of her brother and how grief was experienced in the family.
• Grief is also about losing something you were fond of.
• There can be shame in grieving.
• Grieving people do not want a consolation prize, please do not use the words 'At least…".
• Sometimes there is no fixing a situation and "fixing" sometimes might just mean feeling sad.
• Our emotions and feelings have to come through to be complete.
• Susan talks about how families sometimes mismanaged information.
• Show up for the people that you love.
• Heather explains how to turn guilt into gratefulness.
• Heather shares how she works with her clients about the concept of reinvention.
• Make meaning out of your loss.
• Heather shares a beautiful experience of the connection she has with her father that recently passed away.
• Heather suggests everyone struggling with grief to connect with their bodies, it can be as simple as taking a walk, starting with one humble step.

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

Meet Heather Dempsey

Visit Heather's website

Follow Heather on YouTube, Instagram, and Facebook.

Learn more about Heather's Course Live Without Limitations.

Susan welcomes Samantha Ruth to today's episode. Samantha is a Psychologist, Speaker, Best Selling Author, and the Proud Founder of Griefhab: a 24/7 support community open to anyone who has experienced a loss. She helps people around the world turn their pain into their power by guiding them to be their true selves not who they think they need to be, by embracing their differences, and by living life on their own terms.

Samantha's mission is to change the way the world views both grief and mental health, so people can speak about whatever issues they have and get the help they not only need but deserve without fear of judgment, labels, and repercussions.

In her free time, you can find Samantha with her pups on one of their outdoor adventures. Music fuels Samantha's soul, family means everything to her, and honoring her late husband, Jim, and making him proud gives her life daily purpose.

Key Takeaways:

• Samantha shares her grief story.
• Trauma forced Samantha to take care of herself.
• Meeting new people became a huge help for Samantha because there was no expectation there.
• Samantha became more intentional and stopped seeing people that were not resonating with her anymore.
• Listen to your own intuition, despite everyone's opinions.
• Your job is really to heal. Trust yourself.
• Find your tribe.
• Start doing whatever feels good to you, no reasons, no explanations, find your joy.
• Samantha shares how she managed her own grief while supporting other people who are grieving.
• It is ok to grieve and be uncomfortable.
• People who judge do not really understand the grieving that you are going through.
• Learn your strengths, weaknesses, and when to ask for help.
• Samantha shares a piece of advice: Get through this minute, this is your path, and remember one tool that you have with you always is breathing.

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

Meet Samantha Ruth:

You can work with Samantha individually, in one of her exclusive groups, or you can have her speak at your event or organization. Contact Samantha to determine what's best for you at [email protected].

Visit Samantha's Website

Connect with Samantha on Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, Twitter, and on ClubHouse

Take part in Samantha's Facebook Group

Listen to the To Be Ruthless Show

Maria Price accompanies Susan to today's episode. Maria is a teacher, a wife, and a mom. She is also the author of Love You Still, a memoir that chronicles Julia's unexpected stillbirth at term, and the beginnings of the grief journey, complete with depression, a crisis of faith, and an unplanned pregnancy that followed.

As Maria learns how to navigate life without her daughter and its impacts on her relationships and personal well-being, she has become passionate about breaking the silence surrounding infant and pregnancy loss. She tells her story and supports the telling of other parents' stories of their own much-loved babies in support groups, social media, and in quiet, local coffee shops.

Love You Still is her debut book and memoir. Maria and her family make their home in Iowa.

Key Takeaways:

• Maria shares her story.
• People often misunderstand and underestimate the loss of an unborn son or daughter.
• Maria shares how she started writing her book Love You Still.
• Maria works with families that went through the loss of a child from an unexpected stillbirth.
• People who are grieving need to talk about their lost loved ones.
• Susan and Maria talk about the healing power of remembering.
• Maria talks about what was helpful for her during her grieving process.
• Maria talks about how her faith struggled after losing Julia.
• Maria talks about the unexpected pregnancy that came after Julia.
• Maria extends her advice to those who are grieving and also to those who are supporting someone who is grieving.

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

A Thousand Names for Joy: How to Live in Harmony with the Way Things Are, Byron Katie and Stephen Mitchell

Meet Maria Price

Follow Maria on Facebook and Instagram

Maria's website is coming soon! www.MariaPriceAuthor.com

Love You Still is available on Amazon, Barnesandnoble.com and Bookshop.org

Heidi Dunstan is a certified grief educator and best-selling author. Her passion to help others, learn more about grief, and how to support others who are grieving came after losing her husband unexpectedly almost three years ago. Her experience with friends and loved ones saying the wrong thing or completely disappearing gave her first-hand knowledge that many people have never learned how to grieve which often leaves grievers to grieve in isolation.

Key Takeaways:

• Heidi shares her grieving story and how it led her to her current work.
• Susan shares the moment when her life was changed forever.
• Sometimes people just don't know how to deal with their own grief.
• Loss and grief cannot be compared.
• You don't need to know how somebody died, they are not coming back. You don't want to put people through that trauma again.
• Some people will just leave you when you need them the most and some others will hold space for you.
• People have no idea of what you are going through.
• It is not just death that you are dealing with but the disruption of your entire life.
• Heidi highlights the difference between being a single parent and being a solo parent.
• You still love the person you lost, and that is why time is not always on your side.
• Choosing the people to surround yourself with is critical when you are grieving.
• Some friends will just sit there, witness, let you feel, and grieve the way you can.
• If you don't know what to do for someone who is grieving, just ask, and offer only the things that you know you can deliver.
• Sharing stories not only brings memories back but for some people has healing power. Ask the person who is grieving how he or she feels about bringing memories of the lost loved one back.
• Heidi shares how to support someone who is grieving: love them where they are at.
• Heidi speaks about how to find comfort when you are grieving.

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

Meet Heidi Dunstan

Visit Heidi's website

Email Heidi at [email protected]

Follow Heidi on Instagram and Facebook

Susan welcomes Ria Ray, who is an artist, a creator, and a spiritual teacher. Her life took a defining turn when she was in her late twenties and a horrible accident took the life of her immediate family. Her need to make sense of this tragedy propelled her to look within and try to make sense of the world and understand the meaning of life. Walking through her grief, she found a determination to embrace life and love, which at the time seemed rather irrational.

Ria is fully committed to continuing to push her own boundaries, past her internal limits, so she can feel and experience more of herself. Her drive strengthens her ability to serve the consciousness of humanity in the most expansive way possible and it is contagious to be uplifted by this energy. From workshops where she guides people to learn to be fearless and embrace uncertainty, she moves people to own the beacon that shines within, to bypass the judgment and pain on their road to discovery.

Key Takeaways:

• Ria shares how a terrible tragedy changed her life and became a defining moment.
• You don't know how other people are going to react to death.
• Ria was sued by her own extended family.
• Ria met a powerful inner strength that she had no idea that she had.
• Ria talks about how grieving became a glue that brought together past trauma and her experiences in a dysfunctional family, and how she learned to see through all those layers to progress personally and emotionally.
• Ria talks about how she experienced survival guilt and kept on blaming herself for not being there.
• The tragedy awakened a missing part of Ria, and that missing part was her soul.
• Ria speaks about the first time her heart opened.
• Painting allowed Ria to free her soul.
• Ria found her purpose in giving, sharing, and helping, she didn't want anyone to feel as desperate and lonely as she did.
• Little steps are the only way to heal.
• Ria explains how she teaches other people to accept their vulnerability and connect to their souls.
• Ria found that she could be anything that she wanted.

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

Meet Ria Ray:

Learn more about Ria Ray

Susan welcomes Dr. Elizabeth Collins to today's episode. She is the owner and director of The East West Company, an integrative wellness practice specializing in burnout recovery coaching, functional medicine, acupuncture, and more. She uses her combined backgrounds in both Eastern and biomedicines, along with her training in hypnosis to approach healing from a perspective that seeks to fully integrate the mind, body, and spirit. After experiencing and recovering from burnout, she made it her mission to help others identify their values, explore boundaries and bring a sense of balance to both their body and brain.

Key Takeaways:

• Dr. Elizabeth explains how she uses Tarot in her practice, shuffles the cards, and one is chosen for this episode.
• Dr. Elizabeth shares her grief and burnout stories which are very much intertwined.
• Grief is cumulative.
• Dr. Elizabeth shares how to process and feel Little G and Big G of grief.
• You can be grateful and disappointed at the same time, give yourself permission to feel your feelings.
• Take the word "but" out of your language and replace it with "and".
• Boundaries and resentment are two huge parts of burnout recovery.
• In Chinese medicine, no emotions should go unprocessed: joy, worry, grief, fear, and anger.
• Journaling is a great way to start processing your emotions and elevate your mood.
• Nothing is off-limits, your experiences and feelings are ok.
• Susan talks about faith and hope.
• You can have faith in yourself or in anything you want (you don't need anyone's permission for it.)
• Dr. Elizabeth gives her advice: Do not forget the connection you have to yourself, to life, and sometimes even to grief, just breathe!

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

Meet Dr. Elizabeth Collins:

Learn more about Dr. Elizabeth Collins

The East West Company

Follow Elizabeth on Instagram and Facebook

Elizabeth Collins is the owner and director of The East West Company, an integrative wellness practice specializing in burnout recovery coaching, functional medicine, acupuncture, and more. She uses her combined backgrounds in both Eastern and biomedicines, as well as her training in hypnosis, to approach healing from a perspective that seeks to fully integrate the mind, body, and spirit. After experiencing and recovering from burnout, she made it her mission to help others identify their values, explore their boundaries, and bring a sense of balance to both their body and brain. When she's not working with clients, she's voraciously consuming all forms of music, reading, sharpening her tarot card skills, and crafting custom cocktails from random ingredients in her pantry.

Susan is accompanied by Leigh White, who is a Transformational Coach and Energy Healer based in Sydney Australia. Leigh has over two decades of experience in management and mentoring in the creative, publishing, entertainment, and community sectors, but her life was changed completely the day she received the news about the death of her brother who had committed suicide. She didn't know what to do with her grief. Leigh reached out for the information and support needed to begin her healing process, became part of a community and went on to co-found a registered harm prevention charity called Wings of Hope. Later, she started seeing an Energy Healer which had a great impact on her, so she decided to pursue this as a career to help others on their healing journeys as well.

In this episode, Leigh and Susan talk about loss, grief, respecting feelings and processes, and how giving back can be a great healing resource.

Key Takeaways:

• Leigh shares her story and the details of the last call she had with her brother.
• Leigh talks about the shock of finding out that her brother had committed suicide.
• She realized she needed to seek help and joined a group.
• It doesn't feel that we are going to be ok, even when we know it.
• What is not helpful to hear: "Time is your friend", "They are in a better place", "Hang in there", "God called them back for a reason".
• What is actually helpful: "I am going to be by your side", "We'll figure this out together", "You are going to be ok, I promise you that".
• Don't feel rushed about grieving.
• Leigh and a group of people she met began a charity called Wings of Hope.
• Susan shares how she resented the fact that people wanted her to be strong and resilient while grieving.
• Therapy and medication do not work for everyone.
• Leigh talks about her transformation journey and how she started to turn grief into something more powerful.
• Sometimes doing less, staying in your grief, and being quiet is what works the best.
• Leigh shares the creation of the book Red Chocolate Elephant for children and families bereaved by suicide.
• You don't have to do great things if you want to transform your grief, sometimes the smallest things can create a great impact.
• Leigh talks about the shame and guilt that are often felt by family members that lost a loved one by suicide.
• All your feelings are valid, owning them is the only way to go through them.
• Leigh shares her first visit with an energy healer — without knowing that later she would become a transformational coach and energy healer herself.
• Susan explains what energy work can look like.
• Leigh shares her suggestion for people coping with grief: Understand what is happening to your body, tell somebody how you feel, and remember that you will get through this and you will be different (but not in a bad way).

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

Learn more about Leigh White:

Visit Leigh White's website

Leigh White is a Transformational Coach and Master Energy Healer based in Sydney Australia. Leigh began her career in marketing in the book and high-tech publishing sectors, working with famous authors and many athletes and performers including actor Jack Thompson, surfers Layne Beachley, Kelly Slater, and Tom Carroll, and skater Tony Hawk. On the outside she appeared to have it all, married with two children and a great career as a media advisor, until a pivotal moment when Leigh lost her brother by suicide, on September 11th, 2006. Leigh's world stopped overnight. Fortunately, she was able to get the support she needed and went on to author a book chapter, co-found a registered harm prevention charity, and pivot into being a Transformational Coach and Healer to others.

Leigh met four wonderful women who had also experienced loss and together co-founded a registered harm prevention charity, which still continues today. wings of hope.org.au W.I.N.G.S is an acronym for "We Inspire New Growth After Suicide Loss"

Leigh created a tool kit that is breaking the rules of what you believe is possible. Using Leigh's proven process to TURN A BAD DAY AROUND so YOU HAVE CALM AND CLARITY. Please download this two-part kit, by clicking here: https://soultopia.activehosted.com/f/3

Download for free: Have You Ever Wondered How to Turn a Bad Day Around?

Susan is accompanied to today's episode by Kori Clausen, author of the book Paddle Out: Death Is Life-Changing. Kori does not consider herself a writer but instead claims that her husband Clint, who passed away, was the one writing it through her. Kori shares today about her grief journey and how she found peace in being present, allowing herself to feel, lowering the mean voices in her head, and experiencing gratitude for all the gifts life has granted her.

Key Takeaways:

• Kori shares about her husband Clint and the amazing 15 years she was married to him.
• Kori and Susan talk about psychic intuition, stopping the constant motion to listen to the voice within, whispering the thing to do next.
• Kori found that she could write when she stopped thinking about writing and started feeling it.
• Kori realized the amazing value of being present and avoiding listening to that voice in her head.
• Kori thinks that Clint knew he was going to die, because of the decisions he took during the two last months of his life.
• Be careful about what you tell yourself because if you sustain the same message long enough you will create it.
• Honor your feelings all the time, accepting them is the only way of processing those feelings, and being able to come to a different place with them.
• Give yourself permission to grief in a way that is cathartic and healing for YOU, your way of grieving won't follow a script, let it be, and love yourself in the process.
• Knowing that she wasn't alone was the greatest comfort for Kori.
• As humans, we tend to attach ourselves to anything, but really nothing is really even ours.
• Kori talks about her book Paddle Out.
• Kori shares her advice to start the journey of self-love and reinvention: Slow down, take a big breath, experience what it really looks like to be present, live instead of worrying all the time.

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

Paddle Out: Death Is Life-Changing, Kori Clausen

Meet Kori Clausen:

Kori Clausen has never considered herself a writer. She still doesn't. While she has accomplished a series of amazing things in her life, including an international dance career, running a restaurant, working as a renowned yoga instructor, organizing charity events and raising her four amazing daughters, she never thought "author" would be on that list. She blames her husband Clint, who passed a few years ago. In fact, she's more than a little convinced that Clint is actually the one writing this book and she's just serving as his vessel. And she's okay with that; he always enjoyed the limelight a little more than she did. Just as with the years she got to spend married to him, she's simply happy to be a part of the journey.

Reverend Anne Presuel, a recurrent guest on the podcast, joins Susan in today's episode. Both Reverend Anne and Susan are connected in their spiritual paths, a relationship that started as a coaching-client relationship to experiencing loss and turning that around into a spiritual friendship.

Key Takeaways:

• Reverend Anne shares her grief story and how her life pivoted unexpectedly as a result of it.
• The same day Anne published her book A Divine Intuitive Awakening she got a call from Luisa, her assistant and right hand at her business, telling her she contracted COVID; five days later she passed away, leaving Anne in terrible sorrow.
• Anne has been through trauma, she knew this grief wouldn't last forever, and that she needed to honor the process.
• Anne kept on asking herself what was next after Luisa died, and she granted herself the time to process and feel until she was ready.
• Sometimes what people think will be good for you is not what resonates with your grieving process.
• Sometimes you just need to "clear the deck" when you try to move forward and realize that there are some things in your life that are no longer working for you.
• Anne started asking herself if she should stop all the work she had been doing for ten years, was it time to let that business go because Luisa was not there?
• Anne came to the conclusion that she could allow herself the freedom to stop trying to make her business work the way it did, and instead thinking of something different, new, and even possibly fun.
• Anne found treasures in Thrift Shops and found pleasure and fun in finding this stuff a new home.
• How did Anne realize this really was the right way to go? A sacred contract was laid between Luisa and Anne, the whole journey was actually completed and it had reached its ending. Anne needed to trust her intuition even though she was not sure about the reasons why things happened the way they did.
• Following the energy of the light is a very important piece especially when you are at your darkest times.
• Practicing gratitude lets you be present in this moment where you are.

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

Listen to Allow Yourself to Let Life and Hope Back In with Reverend Anne Presuel

A Divinely Intuitive Awakening: How Divine Connection Healed Unspeakable Trauma and Created a Life of Love, Magic and Miracles, Anne Presuel

In today's episode, Susan is joined by Myree Morsi, a soul guide and transformational therapist who since 1999 has supported people who are navigating their awakening, healing, soul alignment, and spiritual journeys. After successfully healing her own PTSD from childhood abuse, Myree is dedicated to helping others heal their trauma, claim their spiritual gifts, elevate as soulful leaders, stabilize, and befriend their awakening experiences in the midst of modern pressurized lives. She has walked a deep and transformative journey with grief from the tragic and horrific death of her younger brother in 2013. The Path of grief led her to access priceless joy and it has remained with her ever since.

Key Takeaways:

• Myree shares how she grieved her brother, who was her best friend.
• Myree'ss first experience of grief was when her father died when she was 7 years old.
• Myree shares the details of her brother's exhausting mental illness journey.
• Healing is about integrating the science of healing and the spiritual aspect of it.
• After her brother died, Myree experienced fearlessness, she stopped being afraid of pain and experienced freedom.
• Myree imagined how it would feel to die in the way her brother did and that led her to explore her personal history, which led her to a spiritual liberation.
• Myree experienced being able to let go, surrender and reach the root of pain (which is not recommended if you are not properly supported).
• Therapy works as a result of the relationship that is established with the practitioner.
• Myree talks about her therapeutic approach with her clients.
• You can be your own healer.
• What is the difference between a spiritual and a therapeutic approach to healing?
• Miracles can just be a shift in perception.
• People tend to avoid their feelings, but in order to heal you need to face your feelings and deal with them.
• Gratitude can be a life savior.
• Susan shares a journaling technique that she loves and is called Rage on the Page.
• Myree explains what a seer is.
• Myree shares actionable suggestions for listeners who are grieving heavily to start to feel better.

Resources

Tendrilsofgrief.com

Email Susan: [email protected]

Learn more about Myree Morsi