Nightly News Roundup

By Jason Thompson

A news headline show for people who love to hate the news and hate to love the news.

Art by Cory Drake.

Hosted on Acast. See

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FAQs about Nightly News Roundup:

How many episodes does Nightly News Roundup have?

The podcast currently has 310 episodes available.

Nightly News Roundup episodes:

August 06, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for Aug. 5, 2025
Congress is jerking off to the Epstein files, New York just got defunded on terror protection, and California’s drawing maps with the subtlety of a prison riot. The FDA says “good luck not dying” while outsourcing food safety to states running on bake sale budgets. Trump’s resurrecting racist statues and calling it beautification, wildfires are roasting the continent like a cheap brisket, and a Nebraska town hall just turned into a mosh pit over Medicaid cuts.

Theo Jesterfield here, coughing through the smoke, dodging subpoenas, and watching democracy collapse under PowerPoint slides and Confederate cosplay.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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6min
August 05, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for Aug. 4, 2025
Russia’s waving nukes around again, Trump wants $15K per tourist, and Sean Duffy is strapping a nuclear reactor to the moon. Texas Republicans are hunting Democrats across state lines like cartoon bounty hunters. Pam Bondi's resurrecting the Mueller probe with all the precision of a chainsaw in a dollhouse. Trump’s tax cuts just lit the deficit on fire, a dildo flew across a WNBA court, and Bristol Motor Speedway served 91,000 baseball fans no food and even less beer.

Theo Jesterfield reporting from the scene—where the missiles are back, the food is gone, and democracy is duct-taped to a folding chair.

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6min
August 02, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for Aug. 1, 2025
The Smithsonian scrubbed Trump from its impeachment exhibit. The Trump Administration opens up your private medical records like an all-you-can-eat buffet. Trump also fired the head of the Bureau of Labor Statistics because reality bruised his ego. He also deployed two nuclear submarines over a Russian tweet, public broadcasting is gutted, NPR gets silenced, and Big Bird gets executed by budget cuts. Ghislaine Maxwell, child sex trafficker and Epstein’s fixer, gets upgraded to prison summer camp after a cozy chat with Trump’s DOJ pals. Meanwhile, mutant radioactive wasps invade a South Carolina nuke site, and a man in Buffalo turns an airport cart into performance art with shattered glass and very slow carnage. Theo Jesterfield reporting from the bunker—where facts are armed and sarcasm is weaponized.
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6min
August 01, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for July 31, 2025
Trade war threats, taxpayer-funded ballrooms, and CEOs dropping like flies — just another week in America’s flaming clown car. Trump’s wrecking ethics with a golf club, Musk’s lighting democracy on fire with Super PAC cash, and Brett Kavanaugh’s turning the Supreme Court into a secret menu for fascism. Meanwhile, Kyiv burns, ICE offers loan forgiveness to deport families, and the media memory-holes a CEO assassination so no one gets any ideas. Subscribe, rage responsibly, and pour a drink. Theo Jesterfield hosts from the smoldering wreckage.

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8min
July 31, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for July 30, 2025
Russia shakes, the Fed freezes, and Texas slices up democracy like brisket. Gaza’s starving and Trump’s sending a condo guy. Plus: a human Molotov cocktail in Virginia, a baby savings account scam, and Ozzy gets a hearse parade while Hulk Hogan gets ghosted. Strap in. Reality’s on fire.

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5min
July 30, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for July 29, 2025
The EPA’s being gutted at a truck dealership, Marjorie Taylor Greene said something true, Trump is Yelp-reviewing sex trafficking victims, and a gunman turned the NFL’s HQ into a warzone. Plus: biblical porn, cocaine math, and why CBS now answers to Newsmax. Welcome to America’s moral collapse, broadcast live, with theme music.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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7min
July 29, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for July 28, 2025
A federal judge torpedoes Trump’s attempt to defund Planned Parenthood, Trump threatens Putin with peace and tariffs in the same breath, the Pentagon slips into full-on group chat meltdown as Pete Hegseth’s D-list paranoia infects national security. Ghislaine Maxwell begs the Supreme Court for mercy with nothing but vibes, audacity, and Epstein’s greasy afterimage. RFK Jr. calls cancer screenings “woke,” meanwhile, Trump sues Rupert Murdoch over a birthday doodle, Caitlin Clark’s stalker gets 18 months in a padded timeout, and WWE leg-drops dignity with a final, complicated goodbye to Hulk Hogan.
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6min
July 26, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for July 25, 2025
Trump ghosts his way through Scotland, the DoJ keeps dancing around Ghislaine, and South Park drops $1.5B worth of hellfire, all while America’s IQ test gets harder and its moral test gets easier to fail. From golf-course photo ops to visa vendettas, this week’s Nightly News Roundup is a flaming clown car driven by a raccoon with a checkbook. Hosted by Theo Jesterfield from deep beneath the rubble of American credibility.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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6min
July 25, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for July 24, 2025
The orange circus crashes the Fed, the Epstein files detonate, and Chuck Mangione exits stage left with his flugelhorn blazing. Trump hijacks headlines with a surprise stunt at the Federal Reserve while the DOJ fumbles accountability like a greased football on fire. Meanwhile, Jacob "QAnon Shaman" Chansley turns on Trump in a glorious poetry slam of betrayal, Gaza peace talks collapse in typical U.S. fashion, and Ghislaine Maxwell somehow survives another day under federal questioning. It's chaos, it's comedy, it's your Nightly News Roundup - where truth meets tequila and the apocalypse comes with a laugh track.
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6min
July 24, 2025 Nightly News Roundup for July 23, 2025
Trump’s name pops up in the Epstein files, the DOJ won’t release the goods, and Congress wants it all anyway. The White House yells “fake news” but can’t find the off switch. Meanwhile, Trump invents a trade deal with Japan, the EU threatens to nuke our bourbon, and the new AI plan looks like Skynet with a flag. Tesla crashes, lobbyists sweat, and somewhere in Washington, someone definitely shit themselves.
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5min

FAQs about Nightly News Roundup:

How many episodes does Nightly News Roundup have?

The podcast currently has 310 episodes available.