No Crying In Baseball

That’s how we define a successful boyfriend season -- some we picked too soon, some didn’t live up to the hype,  some left town, many were all we hoped for and more, but nobody broke our hearts. We had a great time saying goodbye to our 2021 crew and making room for the new guys. Wander Franco makes a case for being a 2022 Rays boyfriend with his tremendous deal. 

We teach vocabulary words in English and Spanish this week, setting you up for the deadline to tender contracts to players with six or fewer years of playing time (Super Two!), and for understanding the calls if you are watching winter ball instead of negotiations (carrera!). LIDOM provides cover for Yasiel Puig and Marcel Ozuna, and also gives Jose Siri and Mike Brosseau a place to shine. They honor “No Violence Against Women” Day by treating women to a day at the ballpark, and Big Papi will roll out Día de Leyendas to support his children’s fund on December 5. 12/5 is also the next double header in the Puerto Rican Women’s series, currently tied at one each. Pottymouth will need your support this week as her CPBL Lions are making her lose sleep. Lastly, we prepare you for a likely lock-out as the CBA needs to wrap up on December 1st and it is not looking good. We say froo-froo shit, hat trick, and double-fisting hard seltzers.

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

There are two Guardian teams in town, and no one is saying but one of them may be a fairly wealthy roller derby team. Yasiel Puig settled a civil suit to make sexual assault go away, dropped Rachel Luba, earned Defender of the Year in LMB, and wants back into MLB. We are thrilled that MLB teams will now provide housing for minor league players. Check that box and move on to fair pay. Clint Frazier is DFA’d which allows us to explain making room on the 40 man roster. The Mets gain a GM but lose an ace.

The annual Girls Breakthrough Series featured Bianca Smith, Veronica Alvarez, and maybe a path to college ball. Franmil Reyes won’t be playing with Pujols in LIDOM after all, but there’s still plenty of familiar faces. In the LVBP, recently DFA’d Willians Astudillo sucker-punches a pitcher, the Panda goes back to where it all began, and Ildemaro Vargas’ 4 RBI game lets Pottymouth teach us remolcadas as this week’s vocabulary word. (The other option is a little too racy for prom). The CPBL brings us Lion Elephant Battles. We say Political Opinions Above Replacement, tofurky, and Bob Dole.

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

Vote on the pants and hair. That’s how Award Season: Boyfriend Edition might play out. Our guys did well across the Silver Sluggers and Gloves both Gold and Platinum (Patti 13, Pottymouth 11, if anyone is keeping score -- we certainly wouldn’t do that), but our pre-season predictions don’t hold up. You can still vote for your baseball bfs for the All-MLB team. It was “Business As Usual” at the annual GM meeting, at least according to every single GM quoted anywhere.  We do appreciate a good set of talking points. Scott Boras made a predictable splash by speaking the truth about tanking and the need to incentivize all teams to win. Pottymouth sets up the entertainment to come with Big Papi and ARod facing off on the newly-released Hall of Fame ballot.

It’s Labor Day in November as Patti takes you through the economic issues on both the players’ union and the league sides in collective bargaining. MLB sees a defined pot of money and is just talking about different ways to slice it up, whereas the players don’t put an upper limit on their value -- especially the younger players. We have thoughts about the proposal tying pay to fWAR, getting to arbitration and FA sooner vs eliminating negotiations altogether and keeping players under team control for longer, and changes to the draft to address tanking on purpose. We hypothesize on what it means that a majority of the union’s player subcommittee are pitchers, Boras clients, and Patti’s bfs.

Pottymouth’s favorite CPBL team could pull off a trip to the league championship, and has to spend some time explaining to Patti how the playoff system is real. The Korean Series is underway. We celebrate that LMB loves Fernando Rodney like we do, naming him Reliever of the Year. Former Pottymouth BFs Franmil (en route) and Franchy add to the fun of watching LIDOM. Daddy Yankee, new co-owner of the LBPRC’s Cangrejeros de Santurce, encourages more celebrities to shine a light on the league. The Hammers’ William Contreras heads to Venezuela to join the Cardinales, in a league where managers are setting records for shortest careers. Your vocabulary word of the week is “jonrón.”

We say “shenanigans,” “Mountcastle was robbed,” and “eat the rich.”

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

We cry a little into our brunch beer over Buster Posey’s retirement. Our World Series wrap up includes Pottymouth’s dream job, Joc’s Mardis Gras moment, Freddie, Eddie, and Jorge, and a better way to honor 44 than just playing with numbers. Collective bargaining takes center stage so we talk potential lock-out both practically and optically. It’s officially Hot Stove time so we lay out themes to watch this week including qualifying offers, opt ins, and opt outs, 

Baseball is not over! Winter ball is in full swing and Pottymouth’s guide is a great place to start.  MLB favorites are playing in LIDOM, which you can see on MLBTV, and LBPRC just struck a deal with FOX to make it easier for you to watch Puerto Rican baseball. All this and LVBP and CPBL too! Lastly we do some crosstraining with the NFL to drive home a point that even previously favored QBs can be wingnut anti-vaxxers. We say bobblehead color problem, shiny baseball jacket, and “idioma anglosajón”

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

Our Halloween episode has Patti briefly revisiting 1995, a very scary year, in which she first built her sportsgrudge against the Atlanta Team. But now she loves “those Hammers guys” including effectively wild Ian Anderson, the magical Eddie Rosario, and the only Austin left standing. Pottymouth reminds us of the treasure that is Dusty Baker, the first manager to take five teams to the postseason, and possibly the only to prune his family vineyards *and* live through the Monterey Pop Festival at age 18 (the family station wagon made it too). Altuve makes moves on postseason homerun records, but Manny being Manny seems safe for now. Get your taco on Thursday - Thanks, Ozzie.

Odd for us to give credit to Bob Nightengale but he earns it for not using Atlanta’s team name in his USA Today pieces. The Hammers miss an opportunity to truly honor Henry Aaron by not announcing a team name change during the ceremony. Fox makes no effort to Chop the Chop, featuring it in crowd shots. Smuck and Boltz never mention it, or the war chant, while openly discussing the cheating chants. Rob Manfred defends it based on local markets and perceived support by the *regional* Native American community -- for a National Pastime? There’s now footage of a certain former president joining in on the Chop, albeit badly, so that’s really all you need to know.

Please PETA, use your powers for good instead of distracting us with your push to rename the bullpen the “arm barn.” Although that did give us a gem of a tune from Grant Brisbee. We are looking forward to seeing how much the Cleveland Baseball Team will have to pay the local roller derby team for use of the name “Guardians.” It’s going to be fun to watch Bob Melvin manage the Padres, a team with money, and we’ve got our eye on Raquel Ferreira in the Mets GM conversation. The MLBPA’s Player’s Choice awards feature Ryan Mountcastle among other Patti BFs. The untimely passing of NESN broadcasting great, Jerry “Rem Dawg” Remy brings all the feels for Pottymouth, including some warm and hilarious memories.

Do you have the MLBTV postseason package? You could be watching Dominican winter ball! LIDOM features Tio Albert, Fernando Rodney, and Willi Castro this year -- no excuses. Pottymouth’s Cardenales de Lara are undefeated in the LVBP, and finals have started in the Puerto Rican women’s league. Pottymouth celebrates it all by teaching us baseball vocabulary in Spanish.

We say Halle Berry, Kiss the Sky, and vegan hot dogs.

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

Patti and the Pottymouth break down the evils of the World Series teams and the pros come down to I love Dusty vs. I love those guys. Yup, Pottymouth is in for the Trashtros and Patti throws down for the Hammers. In our efforts to show one team’s terrible is not quite as bad as the other team’s terrible, Pottymouth points out the small number of cheaters still left on the Houston team, and Patti suggests a 437 point plan to eliminate The Chop, including crosstraining with FIFA.

Both LCS MVPs are NCiB boyfriends! Yordan Alvarez, who personally out-hit the entire Red Sox team for a few games, is Patti’s Houston BF this year, and the Hammers’ (and former Guardian) Eddie Rosario, with two 4-4 games, is Pottymouth’s former Twins BF. We have some fun with Kyle from Waltham, Jose Siri’s dance moves, and more details than you knew you needed on Joc’s pearls. We provide a more accurate replacement for the phrase “legal troubles.”

We grade team participation in Spirit Day, to take a stand against bullying of LGBTQ+ youth, on a scale of Rangers to Cardinals. Patti goes Hammers in seven, Pottymouth calls Hammers in six. We say appropriately tipsy, Texas Gay Rodeo Association, and “you’re dead to me.”

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

NCiB’s West Coast Correspondent and ace fantasy boyfriend baseball league manager Deborah guest hosts with Pottymouth while Patti hits the beach. She brings the boyfriend cred with a blast from Phillies past with a nod to Mike Schmidt and Greg Luzinski. There’s so much happening in Kiké Korner, from toppling postseason batting records left and right, to a Bold and Beautiful star turn. Current BFs in the postseason feature sexy defense and bats to the rescue from Late Night LaMonte and Chris Taylor, Deborah’s Giants and Dodgers BFs. Bonus vocabulary lesson: splash hit. Pottymouth’s former Angels BF Jose Iglesias now drives the home run laundry cart in the RS dugout and generally brings the joy.

We close the book on the Dodgers/Giants series with a full-season lens, not just that amazing Game 5: The check swing giveth and the check swing taketh away. There’s qHAR love and a bright future for Camilo Doval, Pitching goes all timey-wimey in the Hammers/Dodgers series, and Chris Sale is terrifying in a Strasburg’s evil twin kind of way. Austin Riley is clearly the star of the post-season Austins. We revisit Moral Alignment debates with countering the “no prick” Giants clubhouse with highs and lows in manager Gabe Kapler’s past, and that fuckin’ chop vs the evil empire of the west. 

The Police Blotter identifies former Twin’s pitcher Sam Dyson as the latest suspended MLB player to sign with another league -- in this case the LMPRC. Check out Pottymouth’s Winter Baseball picks and Words Above Replacement’s streaming guide for how to watch international ball. We say competitive ping pong, Honkball, cat fur, and  United Wiffle Ball National Championship Tournament

Deborah’s shirt was designed for the Oakland A’s by local artist Jesse Hernandez @Urbanaztec. It was a promotion for their Native American Heritage Night in 2018 but you can still buy it here:Oakland Athletics x Native American Heritage night T- Shirt It features the A’s logo built from iconography drawn from tribes all over California.

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

We’ve got Postseason Boyfriends, current and former, and Postseason Grooming featuring Joctober pearls and pitcher qHAR. There’s a conversation about Postseason Moral Alignment -- who do you root for when you know too much? We praise Kiké’s bat and Logan’s arm and a double play for the ages. The Hank Aaron Award finalists are 93% NCiB Boyfriends. The Police Blotter updates the activities of usual suspects.

NCiB is thrilled for the selection of Paloma Benach of DC Girls Baseball to the USWNT Development Program. Learn more about #GirlsCamp21 and listen to this interview with Veronica Alvarez. You haven’t missed the Women’s All-Star game in Puerto Rico because it’s been moved to the October 17th rain date, on Facebook LIve! And we check in on postseason Austins.

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

We can't think of a better way to transition to the postseason than with a reminder of what we love most about baseball -- the players. Washington Nationals catcher Riley Adams joins us to share his stories from getting his first glove to getting his call up. We talk about what makes a great walk-up song (Riley's use of Blink-182's "All the Small Things" made him an instant favorite with Nats fans). Riley encourages kids to keep sports fun by playing a lot of them, and gets serious about minor league pay. His MLB page still doesn't show his nickname, but we now know what it is.

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.

Patti and the Pottymouth propose a migratory bird name to replace the “Rays” if they move forward  on the sister city plan, splitting time between Tampreal and Mompa. We throw in for Pottymouth’s forever BF Juan Soto’s MVP bid. Her former forever BF Mookie Betts does right by Reds rookie TJ Friedl, a young player with qHAR potential. Meaningful gifts abound, as Patti’s forever BF Christian Yelich presents a pair of custom sneakers to Bob “Air” Uecker to celebrate 50 years announcing the Brewers, and Jon Lester bestows Rolexes on his two former catchers, David Ross and Willson Contreras, on his possibly last visit to Wrigley as a player. How did we miss Jose Siri’s call up after nine years in the minors? Because he’s with the Astros -- but what a debut!

It’s definitely the Police Blotter when a manager and pitcher receive suspensions for throwing at a player, but did the player do wrong? We look at Kevin Kiermaier, a dropped data card, sending a batboy to do a man’s job, and getting beaned in the  back by Ryan Borucki. Can’t everyone follow the lead of Jazz Chisolm and Josh Rogers and dance it out?

Veronica Alvarez coaches against Rachel Folden in the “instructs,” the roster for this week’s Congressional Baseball game includes several women, and we can’t wait for the ESPN upgrade of Jess Mendoza and Melanie Newman calling  Wednesday’s game. The US Women’s National Team shapes future players at a girls clinic. Plan your January visit to Sarasota for the All American Women’s  Baseball Classic. The IWBC is a step closer to building their museum. Six Cubans have defected so far during the WBSC’s 23U tournament in Mexico. The minor league’s crown their champs and the Triple A Final Stretch makes make-up games matter.

We say “zoning board,” “bicep boys,” and Marjorie Taylor Greene.

Get vaxxed, fight the man, and find us on Twitter @ncibpodcast, on Facebook @nocryinginbball, Instagram @nocryinginbball and on the Interweb at nocryinginbball.com. Please take a moment to subscribe to the show, and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to NCiB. Become a supporter at Patreon to help us keep doing what we do. Say goodnight, Pottymouth.