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  • Scrobble

    In the 2018 film Sometimes Always Never, Bill Nighy plays a tailor who's super into Scrabble. Is really there anything else you need to know? Ian chose this 'un spur of the moment after his initial pick flopped, and both he and Temperance were pleasantly surprised. Take an hour and a half to go on a breezily loquacious jaunt through a crafty story about family relationships, loss, and nice clothes. The Wes Anderson vibes are just the cherry on top. Be sure to join us next week for our first of four Halloween-themed flicks!

    You can rent this movie from Amazon Prime or YouTube for a few bucks. Also remember to check your local video rental store!

    51 min
  • Falderol and Fiddle-Dee-Dee

    Temperance's choice this week was the 1997 TV musical film Rodgers' and Hammerstein's Cinderella, starring Brandy. Aside from the fact that basically every good actor is in this movie, it's worth watching because Temperance uses it as a compelling case for the power of casting People of Color in roles often reserved for white actors. Ian will also happily tell you that the colorblind casting in Cinderella basically changed how he watches movies. Plus it's our first musical for the show. Whether you love or hate musicals, they make for good convos.

    A shameless plug here: given that we talk at length about the lack of diversity in classic art and fantasy period pieces, it's baffling that we forgot to mention the YouTube series Black Girl in a Big Dress. It's hilarious and we both love it. Go check it out and give her lots of money so she'll make more.

    50 min
  • Slide Into My Dunes

    See content warning for this episode after the description.

    No, Ian wasn't high on semuta while recording this episode; he and Temperance just finished watching his pick - the 1984 film Dune - and it sapped the life out of him. Look to Temperance for all the wisecracks and clever insights as she claps back at the 99.9% white cast and muses on the nature of film adaptations generally. Her summaries of the movie honestly make it sound better than it is. Temperance and Ian can both agree, though, that heart plugs are the big takeaway here.

    Dune (1984) is streaming on Hulu with the HBO add-on, and is also available to rent from Prime Video, Vudu, and YouTube.

    Content Warning: The scene that introduces the Baron Harkonnen contains grotesque violence. Additionally, several characters appear mutilated. This scene also associates violent depravity with homosexuality, a theme drawn from the novel itself.

    43 min
  • Porknut Allergy

    Can you, like, hear those crickets in the background? We had to edit each chirp in by hand for an extra-cozy effect. You're welcome. Temperance picked The Proud Family Movie this week, so set sail for a tropical island full of peanuts and ostentatiously well-animated dance sequences. Meanwhile, Ian kept going on about Filmore. It seems that Orlando Brown is the secret shadowy figure behind this podcast.

    No content warning this week. Check out The Proud Family Movie on Disney+ and Prime Video.

    46 min
  • 1 Beaver, 2 Beaver, Olivia Newton-John

    Starting this week, content warnings will be posted when necessary for each movie. Find the full content warning below. We will also be doing our best from here on out to include options for accessing the film in the description.

    The siren song of sad, weird indie films lured Ian in and he made good on his threat to choose the 2001ish film The Beaver Trilogy for this week's movie. We ended up talking about some pretty heavy stuff, but also McLovin', Xanadu, and How to Be a Latin Lover. Still, if you like debates about the responsibility of the film-maker to the subject then this is the episode for you.

    This movie is exclusively available for physical purchase from the director's website, www.echocave.net. Unless you know Ian, in which case he'll lend it to you.

    Content Warning: The Beaver Trilogy contains intense imagery related to self-harm and suicide, though no self-harm occurs in the film. There are also homophobic attitudes expressed by unsympathetic characters. We talk at length about the use of violent acts by film-makers and whether or not it's appropriate. In doing so we discuss self-harm and briefly mention sexual assault.

    58 min
  • Wolf Breath: Origins

    We're six episodes in, so it's time for some dramatic backstory. This week, Temperance picked the excellent 2012 film Wolf Children and it set off a deep dive into her weeb origins. Incidentally, Ian did a great job of not getting caught up on werewolf mechanics like he normally does. We're literally about to go camping so forgive the significant lack of editing; we know you've come to expect perfection.

    50 min
  • Munchin' on Synthetic Flesh

    Ian picked this week, and you can tell that he's having a hard time staying away from horror films. He chose the 1932 mad science extravaganza Doctor X because he thought it would be tame. Joke's on him: it's pre-code, so it features cannibalism, sadism, hearts in jars, moonbeams, more cannibalism, an elusive gay sextangle, and a plucky journalist who gets smoked out in a room full of skeletons. Something worked, because Temperance liked it. Also, we talk about Jeff Goldblum again.

    54 min
  • Eddie's Pot of Stew

    The year is 2003; the movie is Eddie's Million Dollar Cook-Off. Ian had never seen a Disney Channel Original Movie in his life, so this is definitely Temperance's pick. Fun fact: this movie is actually about Bridget Simons, and if you're not comfortable with that you can jog on. We also get into gender roles, problematic armchair critiques, and Emeril Lagasse. BAM.

    58 min
  • Mina Harker Wants the D

    We be real sleepy in this particular episode, which is all about the 2002 silent ballet horror film Dracula: Pages from a Virgin's Diary. It's Ian's first pick on the show. It gets the conversation flowing around such topics as women's bodily autonomy, xenophobia, and some real interesting bits where we talk about the complex relationship between stage productions and silent films. Also, we tease the wrong movie for next week's episode. Come get unclean with us you lusty vampire babes.

    58 min
  • Ramen Girl, the Ramen Girl

    This, our first episode, was Temperance's pick! She chose The Ramen Girl, a 2008 film and a masterpiece of cultural appropriation. Neither of us knew a thing about it going in so you can't blame us too much. Listen as we reel from the late Brittany Murphy's culinary outing in a poor, unsuspecting, and utterly wasted Tokyo. Also, we were sleepy and there are fireworks going off in the background. 

    47 min

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