None of My Business

Why do toxicity and good sex seem to go together? Asking for a friend.

This week, the astonishing writer and comedian Amy Silverberg joins Sophia and Kelsey to read as Sawyer*, a 33-year-old who grew up Christian and "literally so horny" but still manages to have the same 24 hours in a day as Beyoncé. They've got stories that include a wildly shocking first time having penetrative sex, a very messy 10-year situationship, and how one's sexuality is always evolving if you stay open to new experiences—tap in for quite a journey.

*Not Sawyer’s real name, but definitely their real stories

Today’s episode includes …

00:22: Our guest: Amy Silverberg
00:58: Amy's business
10:35: Our business: “Sawyer”
13:48: First Things First: "I knew my mom was going to lecture me"
22:48: Ooh Baby Baby: "I was super in denial"
33:23: Worst Ex: "We just had amazing chemistry"
36:16: Cheater, Cheater: "I started to take our monogamy less seriously"
56:18: Best I Ever Had: "Guess I'm gay"
59:19: Craziest Sex Stories: "I was young and dumb"
1:01:40: Status Update: "I want to lean into having more queer sex"

Follow Amy on IG!
http://instagram.com/amysilverberg

Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen
Guest: Amy Silverberg
Supervising producer: Justin Sayles
Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle
Video editing and production: Kayla Talley
Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle
Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris
Motion design: Skull Closet Studio
Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton
Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.

CONNECT
Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod
TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod
Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad
Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠
Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen
Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The rumors are true: Everyone in the military is sleeping with each other.

This week, the hilarious comedian Lucy Grebin joins Sophia and Kelsey to read as Aurora*, a twice-married 23-year-old who served as a medic in the Army. She’s got stories that include a family of Napoleon Dynamites, peeing on a guy’s windshield, and mommy issues during sex—tune in for a wild ride.

*Not Aurora’s real name, but definitely her real stories

Today’s episode includes …

00:25: Our guest: Lucy Grebin
01:12: The inherent embarrassment of having a boyfriend
08:38: Our business: “Aurora”
09:59: First Things First: “I was big on abstinence”
16:28: Worst Ex: “Sex under the sergeant’s desk”
39:22: Crazy Train: “He starts screaming, ‘Mom!’”
51:04: Best I Ever Had: “We met in jail”

If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at [email protected].

Follow Lucy on IG and TikTok!
https://www.instagram.com/lucygrebin/
https://www.tiktok.com/@lucygrebin

Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen
Guest: Lucy Grebin
Supervising producer: Justin Sayles
Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle
Video editing and production: Kayla Talley
Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle
Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris
Motion design: Skull Closet Studio
Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton
Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.

CONNECT
Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod
⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod
Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad
Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠
Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen
Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Get ready, we’re going to ShipRocked.

This week, Sophia and Kelsey welcome Tyler Bender, the hilarious comedian and host of ‘Tyler’s Kitschen’! Tyler is reading as Lindsey*, a cool 35-year-old divorcèe who tells us all about her toxic first husband. Join in to hear tales that include a cruise ship hookup, a best friend betrayal, and the most cursed proposal you could ever imagine.

*Not Lindsey’s real name, but definitely her real stories

Today’s episode includes …

00:28: Our guest: Tyler Bender
1:41: Unhinged social media comments
05:34: Our business: “Lindsey”
08:58: First Things First: “We fucked all the time”
21:28: The One Who Got Away: “He refers to me as his ‘white whale’”
32:03: Worst Ex: “He was up past his waist in mud”
56:03: Best I Ever Had: “I love a choking situation”
58:49: Current Situation: “The Separation Squad”

If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at [email protected].

Follow Tyler on IG and TikTok!
https://www.instagram.com/tylerbenderr/
https://www.tiktok.com/@tyler.benderr

Watch ‘Tyler’s Kitschen’ on YouTube!
https://www.youtube.com/@tylerbenderr

Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen
Guest: Tyler Bender
Supervising producer: Justin Sayles
Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle
Video editing and production: Kayla Talley
Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle
Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris
Motion design: Skull Closet Studio
Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton
Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.

CONNECT
Instagram: ⁠http://instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod
TikTok: ⁠http://tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod
Sophia's Twitter: ⁠http://x.com/1followernodad
Sophia's Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/sgbenoit/?hl=en
Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠http://tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen
Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠http://instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When planning group sex, don’t forget the snacks.

This week, Sophia and Kelsey are welcoming a very special guest: our producer, Justin Sayles! He gives us a glimpse at life behind the scenes of NOMB before reading as Natalie*, a free spirit who loves the single life and has never had her heart broken. She shares stories about dating men in open relationships, getting the ick from driving barefoot, and one fully clothed guy at a sex party. Tune in for a wild one!

*Not Natalie’s real name, but definitely her real stories.

Today’s episode includes …

00:25: Our guest: Justin Sayles
02:24: Debriefing with your partner about everyone’s business
07:54: Our business: “Natalie”
13:11: First Things First: “She’s a home-wrecker”
17:20: Worst Ex: “Can I disarm?”
26:55: Best I Ever Had: “I have five married boyfriends”
37:04: Three’s Company: “Are you ready to eat pussy?”
43:34: Crazy Train: “A spontaneous gang bang”
58:27: Fuck-It List: “I just say things, and they seem to happen”

If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at [email protected].

Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen
Guest: Justin Sayles
Supervising producer: Justin Sayles
Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle
Video editing and production: Kayla Talley
Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle
Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris
Motion design: Skull Closet Studio
Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton
Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.

CONNECT
Instagram: http://⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod
TikTok: http://⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod
Sophia's Twitter: http://⁠x.com/1followernodad
Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠
Kelsey's TikTok: http://⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen
Kelsey's Instagram: http://⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is it ever a good idea to tell your partner you're no longer attracted to them?

This week, Sophia and Kelsey are joined by the hilarious Kevin T. Porter, host of the podcast ‘Good Christian Fun’ and proud owner of a middle initial. He’ll be reading as Haven*, who, upon leaving a religious cult, was ready to explore sex without restrictions. Listen up to hear stories about Harry Potter fanfic, dripping wax, and experimenting with your best friend.

*Not Haven’s real name, but definitely her real stories

Today’s episode includes …

00:25: Our guest: Kevin T. Porter

01:23: Hearing juicy gossip in church

14:39: Our business: “Haven”

18:22: First Things First: “We met in Bible college”

24:04: First Comes Marriage: “Sometimes things end”

47:37: The One Who Got Away: “We’d need to get married immediately”

50:17: Worst Ex: “11:55 p.m. on New Year’s Eve”

57:08: Best I Ever Had: “I just explored myself so much”

1:04:57: Fuck-It List: “Choking on a dildo”

1:11:02: Status Update: “We have found our groove”

If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at [email protected].

Follow Kevin on IG and X!

https://www.instagram.com/kevintporter/

https://x.com/KevinTPorter

Listen to Kevin’s podcast, ‘Good Christian Fun’

https://open.spotify.com/show/43wOhCblFrUFHTyRb089AJ

Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen

Guest: Kevin T. Porter

Supervising producer: Justin Sayles

Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle

Video editing and production: Kayla Talley

Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle

Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris

Motion design: Skull Closet Studio

Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton

Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.

CONNECT

Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod

⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod

⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad

⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠

Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen

⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What happens when your spouse suddenly loses interest in sex?

This week, the hilarious Brett Dodenhoff, cohost of the new podcast ‘Lust to Dust: My Horny Dead Dad,’ joins Sophia and Kelsey to talk about his late father’s sex memoir. He then reads as Frank*, a 58-year-old doctor who we can confidently diagnose as a wife guy. Listen in to hear his tales of horny orchestra students, sex after stitches, and encountering midlife asexuality.

*Not Frank’s real name, but definitely his real stories

Today’s episode includes …

00:26: Our guest: Brett Dodenhoff

07:13: The ineffective no-hookup rule

12:40: Our business: “Frank”

14:49: First Things First: “The violinist came on to me”

21:08: The One Who Got Away: “A fabulous, tumultuous month”

27:43: Cheater, Cheater: “The sex started disappearing”

42:50: Best I Ever Had: “I just about died”

46:09: Status Update: “Remember our old lives?”

54:47: Fuck-It List: “The embarrassed guy in the threesome”

57:49: Parting Shots: “It would open things up for me”

If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at [email protected].

Follow Brett on TikTok, IG, YouTube!

https://www.tiktok.com/@brettthelorax?lang=en

https://www.instagram.com/brettthelorax/

https://www.youtube.com/@Brett.Dodenhoff

Listen Brett’s podcast, ‘Lust to Dust: My Horny Dead Dad’

https://open.spotify.com/show/5RpohVgue0LFE11mXioDr7

Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen

Guest: Brett Dodenhoff

Supervising producer: Justin Sayles

Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle

Video editing and production: Kayla Talley

Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle

Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris

Motion design: Skull Closet Studio

Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton

Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.

CONNECT

Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod

⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod

⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad

⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠

Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen

⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It’s time to enter the sex dungeon.

This week, Sophia and Kelsey are joined by the amazing Annapurna Sriram: writer, director, and star of the new movie ‘Fucktoys’! She offers her insight as a trained dominatrix as she reads as Kyra*, an adventurous Jesus camp alum who’s a cunnilingus expert and has hooked up with celebs. Get ready to be serenaded by a pan flute and tune in.

*Not Kyra’s real name, but definitely her real stories.

Today’s episode includes …

00:25: Our guest: Annapurna Sriram

08:22: The eroticism of Irish dance

15:15: Our business: “Kyra”

18:16: First Things First: “Vaginas are intimidating”

25:16: Cheater, Cheater: “He was scrambling and lying”

51:06: The One Who Got Away: “I’ve seen a lot of dicks”

54:55: Fuck-It List: “Big Luke and Little Luke”

59:05: Best I Ever Had: “He still has my underwear”

1:07:19: Status Update: “We ran out of condoms”

If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at [email protected].

Follow Annapurna and ‘Fucktoys’ on IG!

https://www.instagram.com/missannapurna/

https://www.instagram.com/fucktoysthemovie/

Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen

Guest: Annapurna Sriram

Supervising producer: Justin Sayles

Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle

Video editing and production: Kayla Talley

Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle

Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris

Motion design: Skull Closet Studio

Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton

Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.

CONNECT

Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod

⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod

⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad

⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠

Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen

⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

"The Roster" With Sydney Kane

In which we learn about the world of “dollification.”

It’s the last week of Freaky February, and Sophia and Kelsey are joined by the great Sydney Kane: actor, singer, and creator of the musical comedy special ‘Wife Material.’ Sydney will be reading as Stella*, a 44-year-old research queen with an impressively organized sex life (complete with incredible nicknames for all her regular hookups). Tune in to hear tales of red rooms and iPad cheating from this hilarious sexpert.

*Not Stella’s real name, but definitely her real stories

Today’s episode includes …

00:18: Our guest: Sydney Kane
00:41: The woes of situationships
18:33: Our business: “Stella”
21:35: First Things First: “Varsity-level stuff”
25:12: Best I Ever Had: “Country Boy Toy”
32:18: Worst Ex: “I was dick-matized”
41:28: The One Who Got Away: “He matched my freak”
51:17: Places and Spaces: “We met between acts”
52:52: Red Flags: “It almost felt performative”
54:48: Circling Back: “He went to Sephora”
59:58: Status Update: “Monetize my horniness”

If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at ⁠[email protected]⁠.

Follow Sydney on IG and TikTok! ⁠https://www.instagram.com/sydneymorgankane/⁠ ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@sydneymorgankane⁠

Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen
Guest: Sydney Kane
Supervising producer: Justin Sayles
Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle
Video editing and production: Kayla Talley
Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle
Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris
Motion design: Skull Closet Studio
Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton
Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠⁠⁠⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠⁠⁠⁠.

CONNECT
Instagram: ⁠⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod⁠ ⁠
TikTok: ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod⁠ ⁠
Sophia's Twitter: ⁠⁠x.com/1followernodad⁠ ⁠
Sophia's Instagram: ⁠⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠⁠⁠⁠
Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen⁠ ⁠
Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We’re heading to the horniest department store in town.

It’s another edition of Freaky February, and Sophia and Kelsey are joined by the hilarious actor and comedian Avery McClure! Avery will be reading as Christy*, a 45-year-old mom whose stories include diapers, peacocks, and hooking up with coworkers (and their brothers). Find a comfy hay bale and tune in to a fun one.

*Not Christy’s real name, but definitely her real stories.

Today’s episode includes …

00:21: Our guest: Avery McClure

01:30: Being in love with your friends

13:19: Our business: “Christy”

16:05: First Things First: “Finally!”

18:40: Best I Ever Had: ”An unexpected threesome”

23:00: Worst Ex: “My other girlfriend”

30:39: The One Who Got Away: “He lived by a zoo”

36:24: Craziest Sex: “We called him Hot Jack”

38:57: Deal-Breakers: “He started talking baby talk”

43:25: Worst First Date: “Luckily, we drove two cars”

47:25: Do It Again?: “She looked like Baby Spice”

51:37: Fuck-It List: “I’m terrified”

54:36: Status Update: “He just washed my car”

If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at [email protected].

Follow Avery on IG and TikTok!

https://www.instagram.com/averymcclure0

https://www.tiktok.com/@averymcclure0

Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen

Guest: Avery McClure

Supervising producer: Justin Sayles

Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle

Video editing and production: Kayla Talley

Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle

Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris

Motion design: Skull Closet Studio

Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton

Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.

CONNECT

Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod

⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod

⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad

⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠

Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen

⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Genuine question: Can you invite people to an orgy on Partiful?
Freaky February continues with the great actor and comedian Mackinlee Waddell, who tells Sophia and Kelsey about her experience getting divorced before role-playing as Briauna.* Jump in to hear juicy stories about hookups in Iceland, surprise fisting, and finding your partner’s Bumble account.
*Briauna is not her real name, but these are definitely her real stories. (And yes, the spelling is discussed.)
Today’s episode includes …
00:23: Our guest: Mackinlee Waddell
00:39: Mackinlee opens up about her divorce
17:05: Our business: “Briauna”
21:08: Best I Ever Had: “I didn’t know I could do that”
28:36: Worst Ex: ”This kid called me ‘stepmom’”
36:15: The One Who Got Away: “It had to come to an end”
42:52: Deal-Breakers: “Your brain is still forming”
46:59: Never Again: “That was a little much”
51:33: This One Time When…: “He went off the deep end”
56:01: Status Update: “We’re gonna make it exclusive”
If you have business you’d like to submit, hit us up at [email protected].
Follow Mackinlee on IG!
https://www.instagram.com/mackinleew
Hosts: Sophia Benoit and Kelsey June Jensen
Guest: Mackinlee Waddell
Supervising producer: Justin Sayles
Additional production: Sasha Ashall, Julianna Ress, and Austin Gayle
Video editing and production: Kayla Talley
Social: Sasha Ashall and Austin Gayle
Art direction: David Shoemaker and Aleya Zenieris
Motion design: Skull Closet Studio
Additional motion design support: Chris Calleton
Theme song: “Feeling Myself” by Joseph, used under license from ⁠http://premiumbeat.com⁠.
CONNECT
Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/noneofmybusiness.pod
⁠TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@noneofmybusiness.pod
⁠Sophia's Twitter: ⁠x.com/1followernodad
⁠Sophia's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/sgbenoit⁠
Kelsey's TikTok: ⁠tiktok.com/@kelseyjunejensen
⁠Kelsey's Instagram: ⁠instagram.com/kelseyjunejensen

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices