It's 938 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections becomes more suspect as time goes on. In the meantime, we try to find our emotional center amid the chaos of silliness and nothing-burgers. Trump continues his normal playbook of performative idiocy, letting the press focus on a lot of nothing, and hiding his incompetence.

Other Titles Considered:

Preppers H

Orphan Crunching Machine

Jesus-Free Christianity

Clean sweep for Mamdani-backed candidates in New York's Democratic primary https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/clye652m41po

Trump cancels signing of landmark bipartisan bill aimed at lowering housing costs https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cn4dwz5vz5lo

Texas Man Gets 30 Years in Prison for Transporting 'Anti-Government' Pamphlets https://reason.com/2026/06/25/texas-man-gets-30-years-in-prison-for-transporting-anti-government-pamphlets/

‘I run the protection program’: Mike Johnson warns roomful of conservatives to reelect Republicans or face prison https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/mike-johnson-trump-republicans-investigation-b3004011.html

PlayStation Is Deleting 551 Movies From Customers’ Accounts, Reminding Us Nothing Digital Is Ever Truly Ours https://kotaku.com/playstation-store-movies-digital-studio-canal-terminator-2000711013

It's 946 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections becomes more suspect as time goes on. In the meantime, we monitor Team Algae along with the president, UFC beats down grass, and Donny really likes all the gold in Versailles.

Other Titles Considered:

Choking a Marine

Tussle in the Garden

Canadian gets Deported

Our long national sunscreen nightmare is almost over https://link.theverge.com/view/68c47410e4a1c5625b037497risft.84w/91a8a2d5

Trump ramps up Education Department’s dismantling with changes on special education and civil rights https://apnews.com/article/trump-civil-rights-special-education-3483478a51ea8001fcc70e8a77d08d9a

UFC to pay White House fighters in crypto issued by Trump company https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026/jun/14/white-house-ufc-fighters-crypto

Mississippi child killed after police shoot at vehicle while responding to shoplifting call https://www.cnn.com/2026/06/15/us/mississippi-police-shooting-child

It's 953 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections becomes more suspect as time goes on. In the meantime, we get in tough with our European side, wishing we could all just... be there. But we can't, so we keep waiting for The Day. Also, the president is celebrating the 250th anniversary of the nation on 14 June 2026, not 21 June 2038. Did we mention 14 June is Donny's birthday?

Other Titles Considered:

Emperor Pal-Epstein

Bangin’ Neanderthals

Swift Consequences, Eventually

White House UFC Event Lighting Nearly Blinded Flight Crew on Approach to Reagan National https://meidasnews.com/news/white-house-ufc-event-lighting-nearly-blinded-flight-crew-on-approach-to-reagan-national

US to cut air and naval assets deployed for NATO operations in Europe https://www.aljazeera.com/news/2026/6/12/us-to-cut-air-and-naval-assets-deployed-for-nato-operations-in-europe

Elon Musk becomes world's first trillionaire as SpaceX shares soar on stock market debut https://www.bbc.com/news/live/czj8dd0kyl7t

Autistic children being injected with unapproved stem cell treatments supported by RFK Jr https://www.theguardian.com/society/2026/jun/12/autism-stem-cell-infusions-rfk-jr?CMP=GTUS_email

It's 966 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections becomes more suspect as time goes on. In the meantime, we offer our condolences to thyroid cancer, terribly planned legal strategies (in the loosest sense of the phrase), and celebrate the successes of local politics.

Other Titles Considered:

Most of it Sucks

Touchy Feely Policy

4Chan Voting

Both Talents

Blue Origin rocket explodes during ground test www.msn.com/en-us/news/technology/blue-origin-rocket-explodes-during-ground-test/ar-AA24kdO6

Judge declines to block Trump’s mail-in voting executive order https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/elections/judge-allows-trump-mail-voting-executive-order-rcna347287

Related reading: https://statesunited.org/resources/americans-vote-by-mail-2024/

NAACP, SC lawmaker ask Black athletes to boycott USC, Clemson amid redistricting fight https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/naacp-sc-lawmaker-ask-black-athletes-to-boycott-usc-clemson-amid-redistricting-fight/ar-AA23GCii

Top federal prosecutor in Chicago denies investigation into E. Jean Carroll, disputing media reports https://apnews.com/article/justice-department-trump-carroll-columnist-ec802c40674fabeefab4dd8ed51aa4b6

It's 973 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections becomes more suspect as time goes on. In the meantime, we discuss the SpaceX IPO, racist redistricting, and Bezos' modest salary.

Other Titles Considered:

truthisms.org

Syphil OS

Backstrapolate

Tulsi Gabbard resigns as director of national intelligence https://www.axios.com/2026/05/22/tulsi-gabbard-removed-trump-administration

A Hacker Group Is Poisoning Open Source Code at an Unprecedented Scale https://www.wired.com/story/teampcp-software-supply-chain-attack-spree-github/

Whoops! Trump Mobile seems to be leaking customer information — and order numbers might be far lower than previously estimated https://www.techradar.com/phones/whoops-trump-mobile-seems-to-be-leaking-customer-information-and-order-numbers-might-be-far-lower-than-previously-estimated

G.O.P. Pulls Measure to End Iran War, Lacking Votes to Defeat It https://www.nytimes.com/2026/05/21/us/iran-war-powers-trump-measure.html?smid=tw-nytimes&smtyp=cur

It's 980 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections becomes more suspect as time goes on. In the meantime, we explore the upper mental capacity of mediocre people. Also, the president bankrupted at least 3 casinos.

Other Titles Considered:

Fruit & Nuts

Republicunts

Auntie Science

5 Depends Smart

Trump warns Taiwan against declaring independence, hours after summit with China's Xi https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/ce8p61v7l68o

UCF students boo commencement speaker over AI praise https://www.orlandoweekly.com/news/orlando-area-news/ucf-students-boo-commencement-speaker-over-ai-praise/

AI-powered hacking has exploded into industrial-scale threat, Google says https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2026/may/11/ai-powered-hacking-industrial-scale-threat-three-months-google

Fact Check: Has Trump declared bankruptcy four or six times? https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2016/live-updates/general-election/real-time-fact-checking-and-analysis-of-the-first-presidential-debate/fact-check-has-trump-declared-bankruptcy-four-or-six-times/

It's 986 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections becomes more suspect as time goes on. In the meantime, IT'S BRUNCHCAST! We barely make it through the whole show, but its still somehow worth your time. Join in!

Other Titles Considered:

The First They/Them

RIP Ch 2

Spongy and Bruised

Tofurkey of Gold

Samuel Alito’s Voting Rights Act ruling cited misleading data from DoJ https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2026/may/08/supreme-court-voting-rights-act-misleading-data-doj?utm_term=69fdd07dd696fcb13cb0a234757dd88d&utm_campaign=GuardianTodayUS

‘The greatest ambassador for life on Earth’: Tributes paid to David Attenborough on his 100th birthday https://www.theguardian.com/tv-and-radio/2026/may/08/david-attenborough-100th-birthday

Virginia Supreme Court throws out redistricting referendum results https://www.axios.com/local/richmond/2026/05/08/virginia-supreme-court-redistricting-vote-decision

It's 993 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections becomes more suspect as time goes on. In the meantime, we break down the kerfuffle that was the White House Press Correspondence Dinner, the incredibly thorough shell research of the FBI, and the King's amazing gift to a deserving man,

Other Titles Considered:

Extendo-Barrel

The King Came

Whitehouse Jack Off

The Other Extendo-Barrel

King teases Trump at state dinner: ‘You’d be speaking French if it wasn’t for us' https://www.yahoo.com/news/articles/king-teases-trump-state-dinner-030531064.html?guccounter=1

Shedding light on the Supreme Court’s shadow docket https://hls.harvard.edu/today/shedding-light-on-the-supreme-courts-shadow-docket/

Trump Says It’s Not “Constitutional” for Congress to Block Iran War https://newrepublic.com/post/209862/donald-trump-claims-unconstitutional-congress-iran

It's 1,008 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections remains suspect. In the meantime, the Revolutionary gets things off his chest from last week, and the Comrade ruins the audio slightly. Donny takes a nap, and Petey is ruining combat readiness.

Other Titles Considered:

Rental Preppers

Good Cancer Vaccines

Comrade Loves Penetratio

Pete Hegseth says the U.S. military will no longer require flu shots https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/pete-hegseth-says-us-military-no-longer-requiring-flu-shots-rcna341256

The FBI Director Is MIA https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/2026/04/kash-patel-fbi-director-drinking-absences/686839/

Explainer: Insider Trading and Prediction Markets https://poole.ncsu.edu/thought-leadership/article/explainer-insider-trading-and-prediction-markets/

The Onion has agreed to a new deal to take over Infowars https://www.npr.org/2026/04/20/nx-s1-5791726/the-onion-satirical-takeover-infowars-new-plan

Millionaire hunter trampled to death by 5 elephants while hunting in Africa https://www.dexerto.com/entertainment/millionaire-hunter-trampled-to-death-by-5-elephants-while-hunting-in-africa-3356522/

It's 1,008 days until the legally defined end of the 47th Presidency, but the merit of upcoming elections remains suspect. In the meantime, we run a marathon show with a cliffhanger ending! Also, Pete Kegstand quotes Quentin Tarantino instead of the christian bible, and Trump knows less geography than we thought.

Other Titles Considered:

Weld on a Nut

Double Assing

Rudely Interrupted

The nearly party-line vote of 213-214 shows that Republicans are sticking with the president's military campaign in Iran. Every Democrat except one voted to order an end to the war. https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/house-resolution-end-trumps-war-iran-fails-one-vote-rcna332178

The Seven Democrats Who Joined Republicans in Opposing Measure to Block Arms Sales to Israel https://time.com/article/2026/04/16/the-seven-senate-democrats-who-caucused-with-republicans-to-continue-arms-sales-to-israel/

Why the Star-Spangled Banner is Played At Sporting Events https://www.history.com/articles/why-the-star-spangled-banner-is-played-at-sporting-events

History of Title IX https://www.womenssportsfoundation.org/advocacy/history-of-title-ix/