Own Your Identity

What if the shame you carry about your body is actually tied to a deeper story you’ve believed about yourself?

In this deeply personal episode, Jason shares vivid memories from his childhood and teenage years — from “shirts vs. skins” in PE to comparing himself to other boys, feeling exposed in his body, and believing he didn’t measure up as a man. He explores how body shame can shape identity, fuel comparison, distort confidence, and even become entangled with validation, masculinity, and same-sex attraction.

You’ll also hear honest stories and reflections from men in the Own Your Identity community about insecurity, comparison, fitness, shame, and healing.

In this episode:

• Why body shame often begins in small, confusing moments

• The hidden story many men attach to their bodies

• How comparison steals presence and confidence

• The overlap between body shame, validation, and same-sex attraction

• Why a “better body” can’t heal a wounded identity

• A practical framework for healing body shame

• How the gospel speaks to shame, exposure, and worth

You do not need a different body to begin living a meaningful life. You need a different story.

Learn more about coaching and resources at ownyouridentitynow.com

“You’ve got what it takes.” That’s what my friend Noah writes to Timothy—a young man experiencing same-sex attraction (SSA) and feeling alone.In this episode, I share Noah’s letter and the impact it had on me. If you’ve wrestled with SSA, shame, identity, or your future, I hope this reminds you: you are not alone, and your story isn’t over.👉 Read Noah’s full letter: https://jasonmellard.com/dear-timothy-with-love-noah/👉 Coaching: https://ownyouridentitynow.com/groupcoaching

What are you avoiding that you don’t want to die wondering about?

In this conversation with Harrison Bly, author of Bent on Men, we explore a simple but confronting rule of life: don’t die wondering.

We talk about what it looks like to:

• Say the honest thing in friendships
• Share your story instead of hiding it
• Get curious about your attractions instead of fearing them
• Take small, meaningful risks that move you toward connection

Harrison shares how vulnerability didn’t come all at once, but through a series of small decisions to stop avoiding and start engaging.

This episode is an invitation to stop playing it safe — and start living with courage, curiosity, and faith.

Because the greatest tragedy isn’t failure… It’s living a life where you never stepped forward — and always wondered what could have been.

About Harrison Bly:

Harrison Bly is an author and speaker helping men find hope and freedom in the tension between faith, identity, and same-sex attraction. His book Bent on Men is a raw and honest look at his journey toward authenticity, healing, and connection. https://harrisonbly.com/

🔗 Connect with OYI

Website: https://ownyouridentitynow.com/

Coaching: https://ownyouridentitynow.com/coaching/

Take the SSA CLARTITY QUIZ: https://ownyouridentitynow.com/ssaquiz/

🙌 If this resonated

Like, subscribe, and share this with someone who needs the reminder: You don’t have to stay stuck.

What happens when the story you’ve been telling yourself about your attractions begins to change?

In this episode, Jason talks with Kevin, a graduate of the Own Your Identity group coaching program, about his journey from shame and isolation to honesty, community, and a renewed understanding of identity.

Kevin shares about growing up with confusing attractions, the loneliness of secrecy, and the courage it took to finally open up to safe people. He also talks about how learning he wasn’t alone changed everything.

This conversation is a reminder that your attractions don’t define you — and that sharing your story can be a powerful step toward freedom.

For more tools to live beyond your same-sex attractions and into your purpose, visit ownyouridentitynow.com.

What if you’ve been measuring the wrong thing? For years, I defined success in my SSA journey by whether I felt more drawn to women than men. In this conversation, I share why attraction isn’t a test — and how real growth is about staying grounded, aligned, and steady no matter what you feel.

Living with shame can make life so much harder than it needs to be. My friend Lare and I invite you to choose a greater future than what shame offers. You are not broken and you aren't alone.

Are your goals helping you become more alive—or just more controlled? This episode invites you to move beyond avoidance and into legacy, asking a simple but challenging question: what do people experience of life when they’re with you?For more tools to live beyond your same-sex attractions and into your purpose, visit ownyouridentitynow.com

What if part of our healing isn’t just honoring what hurt, but remembering what made you feel alive? In this episode, I reflect on wonder as a practical posture—one that calms the nervous system, expands perspective, and helps you engage life with greater openness and courage.

For more tools to live beyond your same-sex attractions and into your purpose, visit ownyouridentitynow.com.

Do you brace yourself when someone says, "there you are"?

In this episode, I discuss how this phrase can feel like pressure. But what if you let it be an invitation to just be yourself?

For more tools to live beyond your same-sex attractions and into your purpose, visit ownyouridentitynow.com.

You don’t need to eliminate your attractions to be free.
This episode reframes same-sex attraction as information rather than identity and offers a framework for responding with clarity, strength, and agency. Discover how to reclaim your power — and join the new course, Reclaim Power Over Attractions.