Paper Cuts

We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Apocalypse Soon! David Cameron and MAGA “hot mess” Marjorie Taylor Greene in spat over Ukraine spending and the papers are braced for war. Salman like you. The Mail has the scoop on the bizarre bromance between the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia and… Johnny Depp? Plus – Very berry, very vulgar. Nigella’s anti-Nutella fatwa gives the Times an excuse for the definitive guide to which foods are vulgar.

Andrew Harrison is joined by journalist Holly Thomas and comedian Fin Taylor – on tour now, people!

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Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Andrew Harrison. Audio production: Jade Bailey. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin and Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Meg-site drama. Harry and Meghan’s website rebrand causes another Royal rift and enrages the Daily Mail. When Jenny met Benny! Jennifer Lopez spilled the beans on her relationship with Ben Affleck to Vanity Fair. Plus – What’s love got to do with it? The Guardian celebrates Valentine's Day by ruining the concept of romance. 

Jacob Jarvis is joined by journalist Zing Tsjeng of Vice News and comedian Gráinne Maguire.

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Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Jacob Jarvis. Audio production: Jade Bailey. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin & Mike Bolen. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: If you’re in a poll, stop digging. The Rochdale by-election is thrown into chaos as Labour dumps its candidate. We listened to ‘erotic podcasts’ so you don’t have to. Guardian journalist gets something sexy in their ear. Plus – The case against Miss Piggy. The i Paper wants to kill The Muppets. How dare they?

Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Ben Blissett of the TLDR News and comedian Daniel Foxx.

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Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Miranda Sawyer. Audio production: Jade Bailey. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin & Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Trump threat. The former US president threatens to abandon NATO allies to Putin, as The FT leads with his 11 point lead on the economy. Gen Zzz… Young people aren’t leaving their houses and The Guardian thinks it knows why. Plus – Tea for two! Journalists from The Times share their worst dates and they’re all terribly posh. 

Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Chris Lochery of PopBitch and comedian and actor Fergus Craig.

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Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Miranda Sawyer. Audio production: Robin Leeburn. Production: Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin & Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Ain’t easy being green. The press react to Labour’s U-turn on green investment. Brush up on your cyber security. Boffins warn of cyber threat risked by… toothbrushes? The fashion crowd. Vogue crams forty celebrities onto its latest cover. Plus – King of the biscuits! The Telegraph’s biscuit poll closes and we have counted the votes.

Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Coco Khan of Pod Save The UK and comedy writer Jason Hazeley.

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Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Miranda Sawyer. Audio production: Robin Leeburn. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin & Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Mind your PMQs. Rishi Sunak tries a trans joke in the Commons and everyone is horrified… except the usual papers. No l’amour? France is boules-deep in a sex recession. Plus – Spruce spring-team. The Guardian reveals bizarre rituals to welcome the change of seasons.

Alex von Tunzelmann is joined by The Bunker podcast host Andrew Harrison and comedy writer Fergus Craig.

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Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Alex von Tunzelmann. Audio production: Jade Bailey. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin and Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: All con, no pop. The new Popular Conservatives or “Popcon” group launched and it went really well, honest. The Royal We. Day Umpteen of King Charles’s cancer scare and every columnist is making it about themselves. Plus – Slam Dunk. The Telegraph nails a column about biscuits and we’re over the moon.

Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Jonn Elledge of The New Statesman and comedian Gráinne Maguire.

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Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Miranda Sawyer. Audio production: Jade Bailey. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin & Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: The King’s illness. The papers are dominated by King Charles’ cancer diagnosis. Wanna bet? Rishi Sunak sat down with Piers Morgan, before placing a tasteless bet with the TV host... Plus – Food for thought? Gregg Wallace has dropped his daily routine in The Telegraph.

Alex von Tunzelmann is joined by The Bunker Podcast host Jacob Jarvis and comedian Matt Green.

Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and extended ad-free editions: back.papercutsshow.com

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Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Alex von Tunzelmann. Audio production: Robin Leeburn. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin & Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Dangerous Dogs. A fatal dog attack by suspected XL Bullies dominates the front pages. Bad Manors. Billionaires want smart homes to do everything for them. Plus – Out of tunes. The Telegraph reckons 1974 was the worst year of pop music. The panel disagrees. 

Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Chris Lochery of PopBitch and comedian Marcus Brigstocke.

Support Paper Cuts and get mugs, t-shirts and extended ad-free editions: https://back.papercutsshow.com

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• Threads: https://www.threads.net/@papercutsshow

Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Miranda Sawyer. Audio production: Jade Bailey. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin & Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Off the beat. Universal Music Group is pulling its songs from TikTok and the papers are fascinated. Gone to pot. Reality show prizes are way down, winners aren’t splurging on huge holidays any more, and we’re upset. Plus – It’s a scrum old do. Rugby is the latest thing those boffins are ruining.

Miranda Sawyer is joined by comedy writer Jason Hazeley and comedian and Self Help podcast host Scottee.

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• Threads: https://www.threads.net/@papercutsshow

Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com 

Written and presented by Miranda Sawyer. Audio production: Robin Leeburn. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin & Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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