Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. (James 1:2–4)

This week, let’s pray that:

• Our kids view trials and struggles as an opportunity to lean on God and grow closer to him.

• We resist the temptation to fix every problem in our kids’ (or our own) lives.

• Instead of giving our kids an easy path, God gives them joy in the middle of their struggles.

This episode continues our series through Christian Parenting's Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation, a 38-week prayer journal to help you pray intentionally for your kids all school year long. Grab your own printed copy here, and join us every Monday through the end of May for guided prayer and reflection.

Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

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In this episode of Pardon the Mess, Scarlet Hiltibidal brings on her friend, Laura Jenz, to talk honestly about both sides of foster care and adoption: the joy, the grief, the attachment, the loss, the unexpected relationships, and the ways God meets us right in the middle of all of it.

Laura has three biological children, fostered several, and then adopted two out of foster care. Thank you, Laura, for sharing your story!

Our dream for this episode is that it would demystify the process and be a resource for moms interested in stepping into foster care and adoption, whether that be in their own families, or supporting families in their lives who are caring for these children.

In this episode, we talk about:

• The beauty and brokenness that come with foster care and adoption
• The grief and loss that are part of every adoption story
• Loving a child while recognizing that their story began long before they came into your family
• Why foster and adoptive parents need the support of their communities
• What the gospel tells us about being welcomed into God's family

Scripture Focus: 

• Romans 8:22-23
• Ephesians 1:4-5
• James 1:27

Connect with Scarlet

If this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus. You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find her books, Bible studies, and more encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.

Scarlet’s Instagram

Scarlet’s Facebook

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting Website

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Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Resources:

The Melody of Grace

GO Bible

Sign up for Morning Minute

Get your copy of our latest prayer journal and join Scarlet each Monday (beginning September 14th) to listen to guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal: Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Today we are kicking off this year's series that follows Christian Parenting's brand new prayer journal. Inspired by the book of James, Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation is a 38-week prayer journal designed to help you pray intentionally for your children all school year long.

Each week includes a short devotional, Scripture passage, guided prayer, and space to write your own prayers as you ask God to help your kids develop a faith that stays strong through every season. Invest in your child's spiritual future one prayer at a time, and join thousands of parents & grandparents who are praying boldly for the next generation to know, love, and follow Jesus!

In week one, we're starting in James 1:1: "James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations: Greetings."

Let's pray that our kids:

• Fully understand that God's grace cannot be earned, only received as a free gift through Jesus's work on the cross.
• Live in such a way that their actions reflect a deep, active faith in him.
• Commit their whole lives to God's will, walking in obedience wherever he leads.

If you'd like to follow along you can get your printed copy here, and be sure to join us here on the podcast every Monday through the end of May for guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal!

Pardon the Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

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What makes a home joyful?

It’s probably not a spotless house, perfectly behaved children, or a mom who never gets overwhelmed. In this episode of Pardon the Mess, Scarlet Hiltibidal talks about what it looks like to cultivate a home marked by joy.

Scarlet shares a personal story about her grandmother, Grandma Marlene, and her mom, and the “irrational exuberance” they brought into everyday life. Their ability to delight in ordinary things taught Scarlet something about the kind of atmosphere she wants to cultivate in her own home.

But biblical joy isn't something we manufacture by trying harder to be happy. The joy of the Lord is our strength. Our joy ultimately comes from knowing who God is and what He has done for us in Christ.

Scarlet talks about the difference between creating a happy home and cultivating a joyful one—and offers practical ways moms can make room for delight, celebration, laughter, repentance, and grace in their families.

Thank you, Shari Wilson, for joining us on this week’s Messy Mom Moment, to share your wisdom about cultivating a joyful home!

Scripture mentioned:

Nehemiah 8:1–12

Nehemiah 8:10

Galatians 5:22–23

Connect with Scarlet

If this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus. You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find her books, Bible studies, and more encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.

Resources:

Calming Your Anxious Child

The Melody of Grace

Sign up for Morning Minute

Get your copy of our latest prayer journal and join me each Monday (beginning September 14th) to listen to guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal: Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess

Scarlet’s Instagram

Scarlet’s Facebook

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Motherhood can make us believe some pretty convincing lies.

I’m messing up my kids.

Everyone else is doing this better than I am.

If my child is struggling, I must be failing.

I need to be a better mom before I can feel okay about myself.

In this episode of Pardon the Mess, Scarlet Hiltibidal brings the listeners in, talking about the specific lies you might easily believe about yourself, your children, and your motherhood—and what happens when we start answering those lies with the truth of God’s Word.

Rather than trying to become moms who never struggle with fear, comparison, guilt, or insecurity, we can learn to recognize the lies we're believing and bring them into the light of Scripture. The gospel reminds us that our identity isn't determined by how well we parent, how our kids behave, or how we compare to the mom next to us. Our hope is in Jesus, who has already done what we could never do for ourselves.

Scarlet also shares practical ways to fight these mental battles with biblical truth, remembering that God's grace meets us right in the middle of our messy motherhood.

Thank you, listeners, for being part of this week’s “Messy Mom Moment” by sharing (via Scarlet’s Instagram question) the lies you battle.

Scripture Focus

• Ephesians 2:8-9
• 1 Corinthians 3:6-7
• Romans 8:1
• Galatians 6
• Hebrews 12

Connect with Scarlet

If this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus. You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find her books, Bible studies, and more encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.

Resources:

Calming Your Anxious Child

The Melody of Grace

GO Bible

Sign up for Morning Minute

Get your copy of our latest prayer journal and join me each Monday (beginning September 14th) to listen to guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal: Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess

Scarlet’s Instagram

Scarlet’s Facebook

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal (and her sister, Aubrey Fuhrman) talk about the tension many moms feel between loving sacrificially and setting healthy boundaries. Through an honest conversation about motherhood, family, and faith, they explore how boundaries are not about keeping people out, they are about creating space to love others well.

Scarlet and Aubrey discuss the importance of inviting Jesus into our decisions, especially when navigating seasons of change like new motherhood. Aubrey shares her experience of setting boundaries around visits after having a baby and how those boundaries actually helped her love others more intentionally.

This conversation offers encouragement for moms who struggle with guilt when saying no, reminding us that biblical love is not measured by constant availability, but by faithfulness to what God has called us to in each season.

In This Episode

• Boundaries are not about loving people less; they are about loving people wisely.
• Healthy boundaries create room to be present, joyful, and intentional with the people God has entrusted to us.
• Following Jesus means bringing Him into our decisions instead of simply reacting to guilt, expectations, or pressure.
• Sacrificial love does not mean saying yes to everything or neglecting the responsibilities God has given us.
• Prayer and Scripture help us discern when to open our hands and when to create wise limits.

Scripture Focus

• Mark 1:35–38 
• Matthew 22:37–39

Connect with Scarlet

If this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus. You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find more resources, Bible studies, and encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.

Resources:

Boundaries Book

Sign up for Morning Minute

Get your copy of our latest prayer journal and join me each Monday (beginning September 14th) to listen to guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal: Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess

Scarlet’s Instagram

Scarlet’s Facebook

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Motherhood is beautiful, but it can also feel isolating. In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal shares why moms need gospel-centered community and how God often works through the people He places around us. Through personal stories of seasons when she pulled away from others in pain and waited until she felt “bright and shiny” again before showing up, Scarlet explores the freedom that comes from being known, loved, and supported in the middle of the mess.

Drawing from Psalm 107 and the call to “tell of the Lord’s goodness,” Scarlet encourages moms to share their stories of God’s faithfulness, not because our stories are perfect, but because they point to a perfect Savior. She offers practical encouragement for finding community through the local church, small groups, and intentional relationships that remind us we were never meant to do motherhood alone.

Special thanks to Lacey Garner, who came and shared a so-encouraging story of God being actively involved in her life at a family vacation in an Air B&B!

In This Episode:

• Why gospel community is essential in motherhood
• How isolation keeps moms from experiencing God’s provision through others
• Sharing our stories of God’s faithfulness, even when life is messy
• Practical steps for finding and nurturing gospel-centered friendships
• The role of the local church and small groups in supporting moms
• Living out the gospel in everyday conversations

Key Scripture

• Psalm 107:1-9
• Proverbs 3:5-6

Connect with Scarlet

If this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus?

You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find more resources, Bible studies, and encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.

Resources:

Elisabeth Elliot 

Get your copy of our latest prayer journal: Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation and join me each Monday (beginning September 14th) to listen to guided prayer and reflection that follows the journal!

Sign up for Morning Minute

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess

Scarlet’s Instagram

Scarlet’s Facebook

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What if my anxiety is affecting my kids?

It’s a question many moms quietly ask themselves. In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal shares a personal story from her own motherhood journey and the fear that she might pass her anxiety on to her children.

Scarlet talks about a moment when she realized that her biggest struggle wasn’t just anxiety itself, it was what she believed about God. When we don’t trust that God is good, our fears can take over. But when we understand the character of our loving Father, we can begin to release the impossible burden of trying to control every outcome for our kids.

Through Scripture, honest reflection, and personal experience, Scarlet encourages moms that the goal isn’t to become a fearless mom, it’s to become a mom who knows where to take her fears, because our children don’t need perfect, anxiety-free moms. They need moms who point them to the perfect love and faithfulness of Jesus, even when they feel weak.

In This Episode:

• The story behind Scarlet’s fear that getting closer to God might lead to something terrible happening to her children
• How anxiety can distort our view of God’s character
• Why the root of anxiety is often a struggle to trust God’s goodness
• The guilt moms feel when they worry their anxiety is affecting their kids
• How honesty about our struggles can actually help our children see faith lived out
• Why we don’t have to become fearless moms, we can become moms who trust God with our fears

Key Scriptures:

Matthew 6:25–26 — Jesus reminds us that our heavenly Father cares for His children.

Matthew 7:11 — If earthly parents know how to give good gifts, how much more can we trust our good Father?

Resources:

Afraid of All the Things

The Maker of the Mountain

The Adventure Bible

I Love You, Little Light

Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation

Sign up for Morning Minute

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess

Scarlet’s Instagram

Scarlet’s Facebook

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

If you've ever wrestled a toddler through the church doors, bribed your kids with donuts to make it through the service, or wondered if anything they're hearing is actually sticking—you are not alone.

In this episode, Scarlet sits down with her pastor-husband, Brandon Hiltibidal, for an honest conversation about one of the biggest questions Christian parents ask: How can we help our kids love the church?

The answer isn't found in creating the perfect kids' ministry or making church endlessly entertaining. More often, it begins with the way we, as parents, view and love Christ's bride.

Listen in to hear practical, gospel-centered ways to cultivate a love for the local church in your family while helping your kids understand that church is much more than a weekly event.

In This Episode:

• Why your attitude toward church shapes your children's view more than you realize.
• The difference between raising church attenders and raising kids who love God's people.
• Why church should feel like family, not just another Sunday activity.
• How to help your children build meaningful relationships within the church.
• How to talk with your kids when they notice hypocrisy, conflict, or failures in church leaders.
• Why the gospel gives us hope even when people in the church disappoint us.
• Personal stories of how the church cared for the Hiltibidal family during seasons of adoption, hardship, and celebration.

Scripture Focus

• Acts 2
• Hebrews 10:24–25

If this episode encouraged you, would you take a minute to subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another mom who's trying to faithfully point her kids to Jesus?

You can connect with Scarlet on Instagram and find more resources, Bible studies, and encouragement at scarlethiltibidal.com.

Resources:

The Maker of the Mountain

The Adventure Bible

Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation

Sign up for Morning Minute

Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess

Scarlet’s Instagram

Scarlet’s Facebook

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered, Who even am I anymore?

Motherhood is beautiful, sacred, and deeply meaningful, but it can also feel all-consuming. Somewhere between diaper changes, school pickups, endless laundry, and caring for everyone else, it's easy to lose sight of who you are.

In this episode, Scarlet Hiltibidal shares honestly about what it feels like to lose yourself in motherhood and why the answer isn't finding your "old self" again, but anchoring your identity in Jesus. Through personal stories, biblical encouragement, and practical rhythms, you'll be reminded that your worth isn't found in your productivity, your parenting, or your season of life. It's found in Jesus..

If you've been feeling unseen, overwhelmed, or like you've disappeared beneath the title of "Mom," this conversation is for you.

Special thanks to Katie Hinson, who shared her own experience with this for this week's Messy Mom Moment!

If this episode encouraged you, be sure to subscribe, leave a positive review, and share it with a friend who may need hope today.

In this episode:

• Why so many moms feel like they've lost themselves
• The difference between your role as a mom and your identity in Christ
• The importance of friendship and Christian community

Key Scripture

• Colossians 3:1-4
• Ephesians 2:10

Resources:

You are Not Forgotten by Christine Hoover

The Adventure Bible

Bridging Resilience

Faith in Action: Prayers from James for the Next Generation

Sign up for Morning Minute

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Connect with Pardon The Mess:

Get to know Scarlet here

Christian Parenting

Pardon The Mess

Scarlet’s Instagram

Scarlet’s Facebook

Join the Pardon the Mess community by subscribing and leaving a review!

Prefer video? This episode is on YouTube!

Pardon The Mess is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. For more information visit www.ChristianParenting.org

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy