Episode description:

Kateri Anderson Heymans is a woman from Minnesota who works remotely and lives her dream of traveling the world. After years of struggling with anorexia and binge eating disorder, she has found freedom from the illnesses that once consumed her life. Since Kateri was 17, she has practiced a type of meditation called the Isha Judd System, taught by the Isha Educating for Peace Foundation. She now teaches this method of meditation and supports others on their journey, taking whatever opportunity she can to share with others the tools and insight that transformed her life.

In this episode of Peace Meal, Kateri discusses her history of anorexia and binge eating disorder, including the isolation and misery these eating disorders caused. She tells us about her journey to finding a meditation practice that positively changed her recovery and life. Through meditation, Kateri was able to gain the self-love and compassion that she so desperately needed, as well as overcome anxiety, depression, and grief from the loss of her mother. Kateri encourages everyone to give themselves the love and grace they deserve and ends the episode with a powerful meditation. 

We cover:

How isolating and miserable it can be to suffer with an eating disorder

How eating disorder behaviors might function as a maladaptive coping mechanism to deal with uncomfortable emotions

How meditation can aid in eating disorder recovery, as well as help to manage co-occurring conditions like anxiety and depression

How meditation can be challenging for those with an eating disorder, who often feel disconnected from their bodies 

The power of self-compassion and self-love, especially during recovery

In Kateri’s words:

On the role of meditation in eating disorder recovery: “It helped me to live as fully as I possibly could within the recovery process.”

On the importance of giving yourself grace: “When we, in our mind, punish ourselves or judge ourselves for doing something, the behavior will continue. But when we’re loving and compassionate and kind and treat ourselves like a kid who is learning how to walk… the process will not only be a little bit less miserable, but I found in my experience that symptoms actually, little by little, started to lose their power.”

On self-love during recovery: “Be loving with yourself where you are in this moment. No matter where you are in your life, in this moment, you deserve love… No matter if you’ve recovered, if you’re just starting… your worthiness of love does not change. So be kind and gentle with yourself as you are in this moment."

Learn more about The Emily Program online or by calling 1-888-364-5977.

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About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast hosted by The Emily Program and Veritas Collaborative that covers topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Are you interested in being a guest on Peace Meal? Email [email protected] for more information.

Episode description: 

Nichole Soltis recently earned her master’s degree from The University of Akron and is now a licensed therapist in the state of Ohio. A long-time figure skater, she will be competing at her second Adult National Championships this month. She has a passion for eating disorders and their impact on athletes, and she hopes to use her platform to spread awareness, support others, and start the conversation about eating disorders and sports. 

In this episode of Peace Meal, Nichole discusses how her passion for figure skating played a role in the development and maintenance of her eating disorder, as well as how she was able to get back on the ice after treatment. Delving first into the complicated relationship between aesthetic sports and eating disorders, she shares how restricting her food did not improve her skating performance in the way her eating disorder promised it would. Instead, it negatively affected not just her sport, but also her physical and mental health. Through recovery, Nichole learned that nourishing her body and working on her technique was the best thing for her skating performance. Now as a therapist passionate about supporting athletes, she encourages all coaches to get their athletes professional help if they notice the warning signs of an eating disorder. Nicole ends the conversation by assuring any athletes struggling with an eating disorder that getting help can mean enjoying life, food, and their sport once again. 

We cover:

The impact aesthetic sports can have on body image

How the stigma surrounding eating disorders can make it more difficult to seek help

How nourishing your body is the best thing you can do to be successful in your sport

The unique role of coaches in the lives of athletes 

The importance of taking care of your mind and body

In Nichole’s words: 

On the stigma surrounding eating disorders: “Everybody’s okay with any body part breaking down except our brains… The stigma is still around and it impacts us definitely.”

On improving athletic performance in a healthy way: “I focus more on technique now as opposed to my body composition… I really think it’s important to focus on… changing that technique and adjusting it, as opposed to changing and adjusting your body.”

On life in recovery: “You can still enjoy your life and enjoy food and enjoy your sport as well… You really do need to make sure that you’re taking care of your whole self… your mind, body, your soul.”

Learn more about The Emily Program online or by calling 1-888-364-5977. 

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About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast hosted by The Emily Program and Veritas Collaborative that covers topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Are you interested in being a guest on Peace Meal? Email [email protected] for more information.

Episode description: 

Heidi Andersen is a Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor Supervisor, Certified Eating Disorder Specialist Supervisor, Registered Yoga Teacher, and Embodiment Specialist. She has worked with people struggling with eating disorders as a therapist in residential, PHP, IOP, and outpatient levels of care. She currently maintains an outpatient group practice of body-centered psychotherapists specializing in weight-inclusive treatment for the intersection of trauma, attachment wounds, and eating disorders through an anti-oppression lens and somatic approach.

In this episode of Peace Meal, we explore the concept of embodiment and how it relates to eating disorders and recovery. Heidi covers the reasons we can become disembodied, as well as different ways we can work toward reconnecting with our body. Heidi also dives into how important it is for healthcare providers who help others with their embodiment to work on their own. She offers yoga as one tool in increasing embodiment, and it is a practice she finds especially valuable to ground herself on bad body image days. Recognizing that embodiment can often feel unsafe for people who are not in white, straight-sized bodies, Heidi hopes for a future where embodiment is more accessible for all.

We cover: 

The definition of embodiment and reasons why disembodiment can occur

How we can start to be more present in our bodies 

What healthcare providers can do to help progress their own embodiment

How yoga can aid the process of embodiment and eating disorder recovery

How body changes during recovery are normal and how to show yourself compassion if your body changes

Why embodiment is not as accessible or safe to those who aren’t white and straight-sized

In Heidi’s words: 

On the true meaning of embodiment: “Embodiment is really about learning to experience ourselves from the inside out and experience life from that place, rather than the, ‘How am I being perceived as I’m doing this?’ 

On the impact of society on disembodiment:  “We live in a society that has prejudice and oppression… We live in a society where we’re still being told that one kind of body is preferred, and so as long as that’s happening, as long as it feels dangerous to be in different sized bodies, that’s gonna impact our embodiment.”

On the accessibility of embodiment: “Embodiment is definitely a key in recovery, but it is not as accessible to everybody. People that inhabit marginalized identities, it is less safe to be embodied. I think that is an important thing as a provider to understand is that, embodiment can feel like something that white, straight-sized people get to enjoy that marginalized identities can’t necessarily enjoy… Embodiment and safety in your body is a privilege.”

Visit Heidi’s website, reclaimingbeauty.com, to purchase The Reclaiming Beauty Journal and Wisdom Deck, read her blog, and more, and follow her on Instagram (@reclaimingbeauty).

Learn more about The Emily Program online or by calling 1-888-364-5977. 

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About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast hosted by The Emily Program and Veritas Collaborative that covers topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Are you interested in being a guest on Peace Meal? Email [email protected] for more information.

Episode description: 

Erin Werner is a mental health administrator, student, makeup artist, and ordained minister who enjoys being present with her family, cooking, and baking. In this episode of Peace Meal, she shares her eating disorder experience, including the factors that contributed to her illness, her process of seeking help, and the power of mindful self-compassion in her recovery.

Erin recounts her struggle with multiple eating disorders, illnesses that were characterized by bingeing, restricting, and purging throughout her adolescence and into her 20s. She then explains how, with the help of her parents, she started therapy and learned to identify the factors and co-occurring issues that were masking and influencing these conditions. Over time and with professional help, she learned the skill of mindful self-compassion, which was critical to her recovery. She shares how she has developed better coping mechanisms through the practice of self-compassion and overall feels more at peace with herself, her body, and food. In addition to finding a passion for cooking, she can now see food for what it is, fuel for the body. 

We cover:

How an untreated eating disorder can escalate through the years

How therapy can help in identifying and working through past issues

How self-kindness, not self-criticism, can be motivating in recovery and many aspects of life

How comments about weight and body can inadvertently encourage disordered behaviors

How learning to cook can help you connect with food

In Erin’s words:

On recovery: “I wish I realized sooner that you don’t have to recover alone.”

On practicing mindful self-compassion: “When you are coming from a place of such low worth and guilt and shame, and you're almost at war with yourself, the idea of being kind to yourself is so unbelievably hard.”

On learning to be nicer to yourself: “You have nothing to lose just trying to be as nice to yourself as you would to your best friend or partner or anyone else you care about. Try to turn some of that loving self-awareness to you.”

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About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast hosted by The Emily Program and Veritas Collaborative that covers topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Are you interested in being a guest on Peace Meal? Email [email protected] for more information.

Episode description: 

Jason Wood combined his therapeutic love of writing with his mission to break the stigma around men’s mental health and eating disorders by launching orthorexiabites.com in 2021. His first book, a memoir titled Starving for Survival, is out now.

In this episode of Peace Meal, Jason discusses how weight-based bullying, the loss of his parents, and a cancer scare all contributed to the development of his eating disorder. He reflects on how the praise he received after weight loss in his early teens led him to believe that diet and exercise were something that made him “good” in the eyes of others. Then, he explains, a cancer scare led him to dieting and “clean eating” in an attempt to prevent cancer—the illness that took both of his parents. Jason experienced weight loss and was once again praised by friends and healthcare providers, suggesting that he was on the right track. In reality, however, an obsession with “clean eating” was consuming his life. Jason wants to share his story so that other men and boys know that they are not alone in their struggle with an eating disorder. 

We cover:

How bullying can affect body image from a young age

How our culture praises weight loss and extreme dieting, which can reinforce disordered behaviors

The power of a diagnosis

How writing and sharing your story can help you find a community of people who understand what you’re going through

How toxic masculinity can prevent men from getting the mental health help they need

In Jason’s words:

On sharing his story: “As a guy battling an eating disorder, I needed to get out there and I needed to share my story because there’s not enough men who talk about it. As someone who’s battling orthorexia, there’s not many people talking about it, I needed to get out there and change that as well.”

On his relationship with food during his eating disorder: “There is nothing wrong with wanting to have a ‘healthy’ lifestyle… But then there’s individuals like myself when it goes too far… where suddenly, I’m no longer consuming food, food’s consuming me.”

On how his definition of a “healthy lifestyle” has changed: “I was pursuing just physical health… I underestimated the power of mental health… social health… emotional health… Now I realize that there is a lot more to a ‘healthy lifestyle’ than just worrying about what you eat or how much you exercise.”

You can purchase Jason’s book, Starving for Survival, through Amazon, his website, and more! You can also follow Jason on Instagram (@mentalstormwarning).

Learn more about The Emily Program online or by calling 1-888-364-5977.

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About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast hosted by The Emily Program and Veritas Collaborative that covers topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Are you interested in being a guest on Peace Meal? Email [email protected] for more information.

Katie Whipple is a Certified Public Accountant who co-led a $7 billion business deal as the youngest and only female on her team. After moving from New York to Indiana, she now participates in community involvement through Junior Achievement, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, and her own podcast “Cup of Common Grounds.” Five years into her recovery, and after a seven-year hiatus, Katie decided to return to pageantry and will be competing for Miss Indiana USA in April.

In this episode of Peace Meal, Katie explores the factors that led to the development and worsening of her eating disorder, as well as those that now keep her strong in recovery. As a home-schooled Christian who grew up in purity culture, she says she was unaccustomed to the cultural and social pressures she encountered at college. The dramatic transition triggered her eating concerns, as well as a feeling that she was living a double life: a high achiever confidently facing business partners and pageantry judges in public, but struggling in private. In recovery, Katie has learned to find worth beyond her appearance and better name her emotions, a skill that has deepened her relationships with family and friends. She has also been able to reignite a passion that provided self-confidence and self-development when she was younger, pageantry. Acknowledging that pageantry can be a significant trigger for those with eating disorders, Katie shares how she protects her recovery while doing what she loves. 

We cover:

How naming emotions can be therapeutic

How pageantry can contribute to an obsession with appearances in those susceptible 

How loss can bring a family closer together

How being open about your eating disorder can you bring you closer to others

How to do what you love while putting your recovery first

In Katie’s words: 

On the fear of giving up her eating disorder: “‘If I give up control of my eating disorder, I’m not worthy enough, I’m not going to be enough’…And that was a scary thought that went through my brain.”

On not letting her eating disorder win: “I realized that I was fearing the fear that I was not enough and I realized I was holding myself back from life. I was putting my life on pause because I was afraid of triggering something.” 

On worth beyond appearances: “My worth is not defined by how my body looks, it’s on how I feel about me.”

About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast hosted by The Emily Program and Veritas Collaborative that covers topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Are you interested in being a guest on Peace Meal? Email [email protected] for more information.

Episode description: 

In this special holiday episode, we have compiled some powerful insights on recovery from several of our 2021 guests who have experienced it themselves. Throughout the year, we asked our podcast guests with a personal eating disorder story this question: “What would you tell someone listening who believes recovery isn’t possible for them?” This episode features some of the answers we received in response. 

Many of our guests share how they once thought that recovery wasn’t possible for them as well, but every little step they made toward healing was so important. While acknowledging how challenging recovery can be, they also emphasize how much better it is than having an eating disorder. If you are experiencing or recovering from an eating disorder yourself, we hope that this episode leaves you with some hope and wisdom on your path to healing.

Because we weren’t able to highlight every inspiring voice of recovery, we encourage you to check out any episodes you may have missed in 2021. Featured in this compilation are the following guests (in order of appearance):

Episode 49: Managing Perfectionism with Kesslee

Episode 52: The Gifts of Recovery with Katie Price

Episode 59: Choosing Recovery with Kathryn

Episode 53: Social Media and Recovery with Maddy Walters

Episode 44: Recovery as a Journey with Rachel Wilshusen

Episode 51: Staying Motivated in Recovery with Abby Anderson

Episode 58: Advancing Eating Disorders Education with Shikha Advani

Episode 54: Building Body Trust with Holly Toronto

Episode 50: Food is More Than a Nutrition Label with Kenzie Osborne

Episode 64: Healing Has No Age Limit with Betsy Brenner

Episode 56: The Healing Power of Horses with Lisa Whalen

Episode 43: Giving Voice to Eating Disorder Stories with Kiera Russo

Episode 65: Honoring Your Hunger with Hannah Howard

Episode 55: Eating Disorders in Fiction with Emily Layden

Episode 62: Eating Disorders in the Jewish Community with Lucie Waldman

If you’d like to share your recovery story on the podcast, please reach out to us at [email protected]. We look forward to hearing your story and more next year on Peace Meal. 

Learn more about The Emily Program online or by calling 1-888-364-5977.

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About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast hosted by The Emily Program and Veritas Collaborative that covers topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Episode description: 

Hannah Howard is a writer and food expert who has spent her career in the food industry serving, bartending, cooking on a line, flipping giant wheels of cheese, managing restaurants, and now writing about food. She is the author of two memoirs, Feast: True Love In and Out of the Kitchen and Plenty: A Memoir of Food and Family. 

In this episode of Peace Meal, Hannah tells us about her complex relationship with food, describing how she once feared her own appetite. Food had been the center point of her career–her professional passion–and also a source of anxiety as she struggled silently with an eating disorder. Hannah describes how sharing her story in recovery has not only connected her to others with similar experiences, but also allowed food to be a source of joy and passion once again. In addition, she discusses the  "good" and "bad" labels often applied to food and encourages everyone to approach eating with self-compassion and kindness. She reflects on her experiences of pregnancy in recovery, naming how she set boundaries at the doctor’s office and strives to set a good example for her children. Recovery is a process, one Hannah says she is still learning.

We cover:

How a career in the food industry could be especially complicated for those with an eating disorder

How sharing your recovery story can help you find other people who know what you’re going through 

How to handle unwanted (and uncalled for) comments about our body, appearance, and food choices 

How we can improve how our children’s view their bodies by setting a good example ourselves

How food can be a point of connection and culture

In Hannah’s words:

On her once-complicated relationship with food: “For so long, my food relationship has been characterized by, on the one hand, some really positive stuff, some passion, and celebration, and the love for food. On the other hand [was] this other darker, harder side.”

On appreciating her body during pregnancy: “Our bodies are pretty amazing machineries. You know, even if we are not feeling great, our bodies do so much for us...I spent all this time being so hard on my body and so mean to my body, and here it is, bringing a person into the world.” 

On recovery: “Give yourself some patience, give yourself some time, and I really do believe that if it’s possible for me, it’s possible for anyone.” 

You can purchase Hannah’s memoirs, Feast: True Love In and Out of the Kitchen and Plenty: A Memoir of Food and Family, on Amazon and Bookshop. Follow Hannah on Instagram (@hannahmhoward) and on Twitter (@hannahhoward).

Learn more about The Emily Program online or by calling 1-888-364-5977.

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About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast hosted by The Emily Program and Veritas Collaborative that covers topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Are you interested in being a guest on Peace Meal? Email [email protected] for more information.

Episode description: 

Betsy is a long-time tennis coach, retired hospital attorney, and the author of a memoir titled The Longest Match: Rallying to Defeat an Eating Disorder in Midlife. Her inspiring message is that it is never too late to be a work in progress. Betsy is also an eating disorder recovery speaker, advocate, and peer support mentor who shows that it is possible to heal from past trauma and become healthier in body, mind, and spirit.

In this episode of Peace Meal, Betsy discusses how she was taught to suppress her emotions growing up, how dealing with her trauma was the only way to recover from her eating disorder, and how you’re never too old to start healing. She tells us how the food she consumed as a child was completely controlled by her mother, and how that prevented her from learning how to eat intuitively. She also covers the combination of events that led to her developing an eating disorder in midlife. Betsy shares that telling her story in her memoir lifted the weight of her trauma and made her feel empowered and free. She emphasizes that you can recover, as long as you’re willing to put in the hard work and deal with the trauma you’ve experienced.

We cover:

Why positive comments about someone’s body can be damaging, even when they are said with good intentions

How eating disorders can affect everyone, no matter their age

How shame and stigma can prevent people with eating disorders from sharing their experience with the people around them

How freeing and empowering it can be to tell your story

How to cope with the difficulties the holidays can bring

In Betsy’s words:

On the shame and stigma surrounding eating disorders: “Like with most mental illnesses, there is so much shame and secrecy, and I think especially when you’re older, there’s probably even more shame and more secrecy. So, I didn’t share it with anybody… I was still trying to understand what this meant for me.”

On writing her book: “I decided to write it for two purposes: one was to heal on the deepest possible level from the trauma I had been through and the other was to give hope and inspiration to others because, if I could do this, anybody could do this.”

On making her recovery story public: “It has been so freeing having my story out there… It’s almost like I was carrying this heavy weight of trauma and emotions and experiences and by writing my memoir, that weight has been lifted.”

On how to cope with the holidays during recovery: “The focus needs to be on recognizing how important self-care is… It’s okay to protect your mental health, even if the people you have to say ‘no’ to don’t understand.”

You can purchase Betsy’s book, The Longest Match: Rallying to Defeat an Eating Disorder in Midlife, on Amazon, through her website, and more! You can also follow Betsy on Instagram (@betsybrennerauthor). 

Learn more about The Emily Program online or by calling 1-888-364-5977.

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About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast hosted by The Emily Program and Veritas Collaborative that covers topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Are you interested in being a guest on Peace Meal? Email [email protected] for more information.

Episode description: 

Amy Gardner, MS, CEDRD, RYT, is the creator of the program iMove and the author of the book iMove: Helping Your Clients Heal from Compulsive Exercise. The book discusses the difference between movement and exercise, and how each relates to eating disorder recovery.

In this episode of Peace Meal, Amy breaks down what compulsive exercise and movement are, both in and out of the recovery space, how to notice when exercise turns into a compulsion, and what to do when compulsive exercise starts to become the only way some individuals feel a sense of accomplishment. Amy provides insights based on her and her clients’ experiences with movement and offers different approaches to changing compulsive exercise routines.

We cover: 

How compulsive exercise turns into a feeling of obligation and how some may operate their lives around their exercise routines

Why slowing down exercise routines can be very uncomfortable, and how to address that

The difference between the terms “movement” and “exercise”

Questions to ask a healthcare provider if compulsive exercise is becoming a problem

In Amy’s words:

On realizing that compulsive exercise was a problem in her life: “It really didn’t even dawn on me until I started having a much different relationship with movement...when I started to incorporate yoga and meditation and I started to realize ‘wait a minute, what I’m doing with my body is not coming from a place of love and health, it really stems into my eating disorder.’” 

On what compulsive exercise can do to a person: “It’s more punishment-driven. It tends to lower mood [and] decreases energy so people have less energy because it is exhausting their bodies so they have less energy for other things in their life.”

On the concept of exercise to become tired: “This concept that we need to purposefully exercise to experience movement or to achieve this state of calm. Which I think a lot of people will do, whether it’s because of stress or trauma...they will exercise to exhaust themselves so they can finally rest.”

Follow Amy Gardner on Instagram (@imovewithamy) or Facebook (iMoveMethod). 

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About the podcast:

Peace Meal is a podcast that explores topics related to eating disorders, body image, and how society may influence our thinking.

You can find Peace Meal on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Google Podcasts. If you enjoy our show, please rate, review, subscribe, and tell your friends!

Learn more about The Emily Program online or by calling 1-888-364-5977.

Are you interested in being a guest on Peace Meal? Email [email protected] for more information.