This week on Pop Uncultured, the quest for online love begins.  Due to my complete ineptitude with courting dames and relationships in general, JY and I call in the big guns.  Our old pal DJ Dan joins us with our new pal Adam in a futile attempt to get me smooching with the fairer sex.  If I have any hope of holding hands with a lady again, I'll need all the combined relational experience of my cohorts.  God have mercy on any sweet, delicate little flower that suffers the misfortune of going on a date with me.  Having only now just set up a Tinder profile, I can already guarantee you that I wouldn't have had a snowball's chance in anal if it weren't for JY and the Comfortably Poor boys.

Aside from all that, we do our usual Pop Uncultured thing of going off the rails and being distracted by the internet's finest idiots.  Dan brought a first-class moron to the mix this week in the form of an article teaching broads how to properly gold-dig.  Allow me to introduce Susan Allen, expert.  This dopey slag really fired us up, I sincerely hope there's more where that came from because I desperately want to know every vapid thought rattling around this dimwit's melon.  Here's the link, if you want to get upset too:  https://www.yourtango.com/experts/susan-allan/the-pros-and-cons-of-marrying-a-millionaire?fbclid=IwAR3uAK30JtGtXwKSY4ZkaoleNdzJuKNM9Lonv_vZoBMDsvZahYAmA3AqJ2w 

Oh yeah, we talk about my short-lived wrestling career, nostalgia ourselves off to the Attitude Era, and about how we desperately want to be gay...I'm officially coming out of the closet as a wishes-he-was-gay man.  I'm brave, you're welcome.  I ain't trying to hear none of that Q+ shit though.

Do yourselves a favor and subscribe to the Comfortably Poor Podcast, and watch out for their new pod 2 Blind Idiots down the road.   These dudes rule, go do Twitter at them, and also me I guess.

Comfortably Poor Podcast: https://twitter.com/CPPod100
DJ Dan: https://twitter.com/RomeroOnAir
Pop Uncultured: https://twitter.com/PUncultured

This week on Pop Uncultured: Gay Army.  Feminine men in a masculine world.  Gay Army.  Also we celebrate several deranged celebrities and their swiftly deteriorating mental health.  Such has-beens as Opie Hughes, Randy Quaid, OJ Simpson, and Linda Blair are all featured in this week's compelling stack of garbage bags.  Has-beens aside, we also sample the delectable musical fruits of a never-was band known as the Original Rhondels (famous for stealing music from such talented artists as Delbert McClinton, Martha Reeves, and even Winston Picket) before proceeding to mock their dead lead singer and his admittedly awesome name (Ammon Tharp {seriously, how great is that name}).

We step into a rabbit hole of schizophrenic conspiracy theories on a channel called Probably Alexandra, which launches us off onto an unprecedented ADHD digression the likes of which you've never seen.  I mean it, this is one for the books.  Unsurprisingly, we wind up on more porn...but this ain't your grandma's porn.  Actually it is.  A quest for Linda Blair/Rick James nudes sends us careening through the wonders and delights of 1970s pornographic masterpiece, Deep Throat.  We just so happen to chance upon a masterfully edited highlight reel of the aforementioned film, and it's easily one of my favorite experiences yet.  It's even better than a frosty mug of root beer, possibly.  There's not a lot better than that, but this is certainly in contention, so how about that.

Follow us on twitter.com, why don't you.

Recap is over at 11 minutes.

This week on Pop Uncultured, a direct continuation of last week's descent into the wretched world of sexy-boy ASMR facsimile pussy eating and finger sucking.  This dude Northern ASMR is a real piece of work, pardon my language.  It's legitimately uncomfortable to watch and/or listen to.  When I listened to WAP a few weeks ago, that was mostly stylized disgust, but this is the real deal, the genuine article.  I'm bummed out about it, either he grows up and cringes about it so hard that he deletes his channel, or he develops into adulthood without any semblance of self awareness.  The latter option will make life more livable, so hopefully he isn't capable of self reflection or humiliation.

We brighten things up after that by triggering Candy with an "erotic hypnosis" video.  Apparently there's loads of these things, some more popular than others, and they're a real gas.  This one in particular is a dopey-voiced woods nymph who wishes to milk your seed out of you to feed her plants.  That's not an exaggeration.  After thoroughly upsetting everyone, I move us onto vaguely familiar territory: a morbidly obese southern lady who provides and prepares comfort/junk food recipes whilst breathing heavily and speaking poorly.  No, it's not Amy Smith, it's not a rhinoceros or a Buick either, it's Simply Sara Kitchen, and her recipe for Captain Crunch French Toast sends us off on a breakfast cereal tangent, revealing one of JY's million dollar inventions: Cereal Milk.  We theorize on which cereal-soaked milk would taste the best while fatly licking our chops to Sara's cooking video.  We're also mean to her, don't you worry your pretty head about that.

Finally to wrap things up, we head over to our latest golden goose: Chef Mike Neylan from Tucson, Arizona and his revolutionary YouTube tutorial on how to make a three cheese blend.  Also we talk about the Ye Olde Renaissance Faire and how we're going to get secretly blitzed while dressing like sexy peasants from days of yore.

And there's a secret thing but I cut it out, too bad for you.  Donate four dollars to www dot Pop Unculture dot com to hear the secret.

This week on Pop Uncultured, we got part 1 of another thick chunk of ADHD-fueled content consumption.  JY, Draque, and Candy join me in a quest to learn about claiming grandmas and oldmanbabies, which leads us naturally into South African idiot rappists Die Antwoord.  We marvel at the agelessness and androgyny of the pale little vampire girl who, evidently, got knocked up by a lanky, dimwitted senior citizen covered in practice tattoos.  I'll admit it, their music is catchy after a fashion, but their empty prattling and debased fashion sense is a little tiresome.  The best part is when Aphex Twin does blackface.

Since we didn't watch gay porn this week, we did a lot of foodtalk to balance things out, but towards the end of the episode we start on a path even gayer than I had hoped possible.  Hallelujah ASMR!  We start off a rabbit  hole that will continue into next week, and will make you wish we'd just stuck with gay porn.

This week on Pop Uncultured, more porn!  Not gay porn this time, but somehow I feel more sullied.  JY and I hit the wide world of xHamster in a one-on-one classic ep, and what we find is - as per usual - sickening.  In our search for the biggest silly tits on the planet, we stumble across a "pornographer's" channel: Big_TIT_Addict.  FYI the biggest augmented breasts in the world belong to this dumb pig named Beshine, and this dude Big Tit Addict smacks off to gifs/pictures of her and films it POV.  Yeah, I know right?  Literally sitting in a chair and jerking off, that's what his videos are.  Honestly, there's no more need for commentary beyond that, but hey, goofballs, if you didn't want a painstaking breakdown of the smallest and most unimportant minutiae, you'd probably be listening to a different show.  The real main event is a revelation in the second half of the episode, I don't want to "spill" the surprise but suffice it to say that xHamster is more than just a filthy, dirty website to look at dames and their pelvises.

All of this is, of course, just the backdrop for a greater tale: JY's renegade past as a trailer park skank catcher, my cum-soaked masturbation proclivities in the astral plane, and even the story of our first meeting over 15 years ago.  We work out theories on caveman porno hieroglyphics, cum stalagtites, cum-ception, calculator porn, trolling a subreddit full of angry incels (we don't, these people are sad enough).  Oh yeah, one of Big Tit Addict's friends (yeah there's a friends list on xHamster), films himself pissing on things (including his own crotch) and that's a laugh too.  Join us on this filthy journey of self-discovery/loathing and always remember, you just have to listen to it, at least you didn't have to watch it.  There's a hot trans at the end that might turn you gay, for your sake and the sake of the planet, we shall never release that photo.

This week on Pop Uncultured, the boys are back.  The Ad Nauseam Podcast crew takes over and rides out into the fray once more to watch WAY too much gay porn.  JY, Mike, and DJ Dan join me in the noble Pop Uncultured quest of rotting our minds and souls.  At this point in the show's life, we've used an incredibly varied, highly lethal arsenal of YouTube/Reddit/eFukt/TikTok videos to melt our brains off, but I think this is the first time we've (I've) actively searched out gay porn.  I'm glad we (I) did, because it worked out pretty well.  From gay Afghani incest threesomes to Burmese piss dogs, we cover the entire LGBTQ+ spectrum in the first hour.

After we cum, we move onto learning pickup lines from a long dead comedy YouTube channel called jokingdotcom.  A detestable, fetal alcohol syndrome cuckhold teaches us how to trick women into having sex with you (or at least how to cause her to make fluttery pretend orgasm noises), and then we learn how to cook a steak with a possibly-too-young volleyball player's vagina.  Have you had enough yet?  Because we haven't even warmed up.

At some point we postulate that everyone with the surname "Jackson" is a black sports player, and are proven about 80% correct.  This launches us off into a celebration of black culture the likes of which you've never seen.  We listen to rap music, discuss cookouts, describe weaves, and even break down the lyrics of the strong, independent women known as Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion and their hit song WAP.  We definitely don't say anything racist, because that would be wrong.

Subscribe and rate 5 stars on iTunes for more gay, racist comedy.

This week on Pop Uncultured, an incomplete description!  I'm tired right now, listen to it.

This week on Pop Uncultured, we dive into E Boys and E Girls, non sexually (for the most part).  Fresh off of the pain and trauma of seeing Nikocado Avocado's gaping butthole, we look for solace in soft, little sexy men.  JY, Draque, and Candy join me on a journey of self-discovery where we learn many important things about ourselves.  For instance, we're not pedophiles.  I think that's the most important one, possibly the only one.  Whatever I haven't moved past looking at Nikocado's ragged ass so I'm not doing any more of this description.  Pokimane and Belle Delphine.  Technically we mention them both but I'm just adding them for popular search terms.  Also we talk more about Unicole Unicron, because she's my space wife.

Just remembered, we spend a lot of time talking about plane tickets after an hour and twenty minutes, not that I'm short on extra material I'm just lazy this week.  I call it P.U.P. After Hours.  What's the deal with airplane food?  Am I right, ladies and gentlemen?

Oh and the recap is over at 12:30, if you ain't havin none of that.

This week on Pop Uncultured: triumph!  I could go into detail here, but we discuss the ever-loving sh*t out of it during the first half of the episode.  Suffice it to say, longtime favorite of the show and the Glorious Leader of Unicult acknowledged us.  Us!  Dimwitted vagabonds spewing vocal filth into our microphones.  More than acknowledgment, she physically manifested two of our dreams into existence: shirts of the finest craftsmanship fit only for scholars and kings.  One of these golden garments reads, "Belief Makes Real," and by Jove I have to tell you, I believe.  I believe in crystals, I believe in moon queens, I believe in Unicult, and I believe in cool things, like magic.  Uniblessings!  I actually mean that.

Here's her store, buy all of it: https://www.etsy.com/listing/687197323/americas-sweetheart-t-shirt?ref=shop_home_active_49

But it wouldn't be an episode of P.U.P. without a deepdive headfirst into fetid garbage. JY, Draque, and Candy join me as we roll in the barnyard filth of one of the internet's most famous hogs, Nikocado Avocado. Deep in the lowest depths of humanity cracked a fissure that went deeper still, yawning wide to reveal the gaping maw of the eternal abyss (Nikocado's butthole).  Somewhere within this unplumbed void we found the ancient and terrible secrets of the thrice-cursed search terms: "Nikocado Avocado nudes".  Not a day goes by that I don't regret that moment.  Man's infernal lust for knowledge has always been his undoing, as it was mine.  Don't let it be yours... Don't.  Click. The.  Link.
Anyway here's the link:  https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ1_G1UZD8qe4VY-mN2Z7aJM70s3UatNpoE4cBVQAWv_G6Q699SMUXHei0980u34ZWaGW0&usqp=CAU 

I told you not to.

Timestamps

1. 10:25 The Tweet Heard Round the World https://twitter.com/unicoleunicron/status/1407157263622565896
2. 11:07 “Belief Makes Real” t shirt https://www.etsy.com/listing/1039957013/belief-makes-real-heavyweight-tee?ref=shop_home_active_1&crt=1
3. 11:07 “I Believe in Cool Stuff, Like Magic” t shirt https://www.etsy.com/listing/1025992972/i-believe-t-shirt?ref=shop_home_active_2&crt=1
4. 23:43 “What is it like to be a Starseed?” https://www.tiktok.com/@unicoleunicron/video/6854338870931180805?lang=en
5. 46:03 Cringetopia subreddit, the “woke vaccine symptoms” TikTok https://www.reddit.com/r/Cringetopia/comments/khmzo1/i_dont_even_know/
6. 59:26 Nazis vs. All One by Unicole Unicron (the video I'm referencing) https://youtu.be/czqWrbOLjt0
7. 01:04:06 Nikocado Avocado Progressively Getting Fat https://youtu.be/uELBEFJvbXg
8. 01:16:09 Niko's 150+ lb WEIGHT GAIN https://youtu.be/mrcaQHr8G5o
9. 01:20:37 Matt Stonie's 10,000 Calorie Blue Taki Challenge https://youtu.be/57k4IFCAu8I
10. 01:46:49 Niko's nudes
11. 01:48:38 Crystals 101, Unicole Unicron rescues us from the darkness https://youtu.be/ACaSaogMThM

This week on Pop Uncultured, a sequel!  We pick up right where we left off with JY, Draque, and Candy last week - something about ADHD Voltron - and dive right back into Jeffrey Dahmer's special nephew, SAILOR MOON 4 LIFE, and the epic battle between Sailor Mars and Randy Orton for the honor of Queen Beryl, queen of the Negaverse and the Dark Kingdom.  Even though I completely lost the second half of this recording, we still got two great episodes out of it.  Suck on that, OBS

While we maintain our rapid fire ADHD pace, we dial it in a little more this time.  We actually watch several videos, even.  That is, of course, after we spend 20 minutes on Rule 34 (including Tuxedo Mask, Sailor Moon, Spongebob Squarepants, Patrick, and even the World Trade Center).  Hark as we react to all of these cartoons/national tragedies sucking on each other, it's a real treat.  We talk about first porns, rental porns, and the classic cinematic trope: woods porn.  I know, at this point you might be asking yourself, "How can it get any better than that?"  Welp, we learn about all the whacky stuff going on with vaginas.  There's like seven labias, a meatus, an office, Bartholemew has a gland in there somewhere, and yet more still.  Any of you broads out there confused about your junk?  Tune in this week, we'll straighten you out.

Last but still definitely least, we have Brian K Scott.  He's comedy...

Timestamps

1. 00:00 to 10:15 Last week highlight reel/recap
2. 12:45 SAILOR MARS VS RANDY ORTION by SAILOR MOON 4LIFE https://youtu.be/UsUpDLTKa8Y
3. 26:30 QUEEN BERYL QUEEN OF THE NEGAERSE by SAILOR MOON 4LIFE https://youtu.be/RsR92pXgWVU
4. 29:18 Negaverse wiki https://sailormoondub.fandom.com/wiki/Negaverse
5. 32:59 Tuxedo Mask and Sailor Moon Rule 34 (NSFW go nuts) https://rule34.xxx/index.php?page=post&s=list&tags=tuxedo_mask
6. 35:52 An example of “Belle Delphine-face” (Ahegao) https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/431/488/a4f.jpg
7. 37:37 Spongebob Squarepants and Patrick Rule 34 (NSFW) https://rule34.xxx/index.php?page=post&s=list&tags=patrick_star
8. 39:46 Twin Towers Rule 34 (you get the picture) https://rule34.paheal.net/post/list/World_Trade_Center/1
9. 42:32 69/11 the best one https://rule34.paheal.net/post/view/1205131#search=World_Trade_Center
10. 47:53 Lengthy (and girthy) porn diatribe
11. 01:17:23 Shrecc Jam improv (The Squirrel Comedy Theater) by Brian K. Scott https://youtu.be/brzBhJPEtHs