Primary Attribute Incorporated

Our grand experiment in post-modern montage approaches its end. The party achieves some long-awaited goals and gains some new abilities. A sandwich atlatl is proposed. Most importantly, the Prophecy comes to pass.

Grickx considers becoming a god. Wealthy bakes bread. Aracyne outlines the conditions under which she'd volunteer to be a practice target. Vons faces off against feathers. Shield is accosted. Accosted by FRIENDSHIP.

If you'd like to learn more about atlatls, you can do so here!: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spear-thrower

Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

P.S. Apologies for the sirens and/or road noise that snuck into the mix! We do our best to avoid it, but sometimes it can't be helped. The hazards of city living, I suppose. Time for us all to move to rural Iowa so in addition to quieter environs we can count as Real Americans whose votes matter and chill with presidential primary candidates!

SFX Credit:

It's our 50th episode! Thanks for sticking with us, and we hope you keep on enjoying our show for a long time to come. :D

We approach the end of our Bold Experiment in Montage That Transcends the Medium (BEMTTM). The party tries doing new things, like moving shop, engaging in this thing known as "work," and finding new books in the library. Only some of them turn out to be horribly regrettable!

Grickx gets distracted. Vons employs child labor. Aracyne doesn't keep her eyes on her own paper. Wealthy really needs a hobby.

Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

Our prestige miniseries continues with the party pressing on in their training and putting down roots for further growth. There's study sessions, horrible grandparents, a friend waking up from a borderline coma, and the blowing up of spots! It's like Gilmore Girls by way of General Hospital!

Aracyne finally makes it as an unpaid intern. Vons gets real about his estate. Grickx provides the finest kibble. Wealthy is an excellent study buddy.

Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

We wrap up week two of four of our montage! A speedy 3 episodes in!

Aracyne syncs back up with the time stream, and everyone meets at a bar to catch up. And be mad at each other. Or just awkward. Friendships are complicated, okay?

Aracyne violates the return policy. Grickx invests in R&D. Vons's past shows up on his doorstep. Wealthy hits the books.

Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

(We recommend reading the title in Aracyne's voice for maximum effect.)

In the second episode of the montage (shush, you), the remaining party of Grickx, Wealthy, and Vons searches for Aracyne, who's gone missing on them. Everyone brings their own approach to the task at hand. Some of them even work!

Wealthy uses her hat-based powers to find the trail. Aracyne catches up on her correspondence. Grickx posts to the city BBS. Green lends a helping paw. Vons shows that, deep down in his heart of hearts, he cares.

Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

PS If you're curious about the Captain's Yacht, Wikipedia has you covered! It was in the finest Star Trek film of all time, Star Trek: Insurrection! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Starship_Enterprise#Captain's_yacht

We cut away from the party's montage to cover what Aracyne's been up to. Turns out it's not just partying! Instead there's disguises, stakeouts, copious amounts of poison, and an assassination mission. Which goes completely smoothly and definitely doesn't break Aracyne's worldview. Totally.

Aracyne spills a drink and gets a new cloak. The GM is slow at math. Vons, Grickx, and Wealthy have a relaxing episode off-camera where the GM can't get to them.

Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

Whoosh sound effect by _Bepis: https://freesound.org/people/_bepis/sounds/414422/

We start our highly efficient 4-week montage where the party members train up, make connections, and improve their skills as part of leveling. And cover one whole week. It's a slow-motion montage. Very high-concept, very avant garde. 100% intentional. >.>;;;

Wealthy goes to office hours and meets a fellow researcher. Vons does the grossest thing yet. Aracyne slips away into her own episode (out Friday!). Grickx improves his reading skills. The GM gets to consult the org chart.

Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

Everyone heads home, dirty and exhausted, after their rescue of Cog from the depths of the maintenance tunnels. The proper authorities are retroactively informed, loot is divided, some people pull off the transition back to daily life better than others, and we meet some delightful new characters on a date night.

Vons is vulnerable to a vixen. Aracyne is totally, definitely, absolutely fine. Grickx visits his local library. Wealthy researches a stick. Bob appears.

This episode's vocabulary word is "sporran!" See if you can find where it shows up in the episode! You can learn what the fuck they are here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sporran

Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/

It's our 2021 Solstice Special! Or whatever winter-ish holiday of your choice!

This solstice we would like to formally invite you to attend a party at the home of Grickx and Wealthy. There will be dinner, drinks, the airing of grievances, white oliphant games, and general merrymaking! All you have to do is bring yourself. The party, though? They have to bring their best sweaters with them, too.

Vons gives a truly unique gift. Wealthy's past comes back to haunt her. Aracyne has a cunning plan. Grickx teaches important traditions, and is the best roommate. Almost every NPC gets invited, risking another singularity. The GM biffs a slant rhyme.

Check us out online at https://primaryattribute.com! And happy holidays, everyone! <3

P.S. Canon Note! This episode uses events up through episode 46 as canon, but is itself not canon. And you didn't miss any releases: episodes 44, 45, and 46 are actually coming out in the weeks following this episode. Sorry for any confusion this may cause while you listen, this was just how our recording schedule worked out. Think of any references as fun teasers of things to come! They're basically awesome solstice presents, if you think about it. :D

(Special Announcement! Be sure to keep an eye out this Friday (12/24) for our holiday episode! There are SWEATERS.)

With a pile of invisible monsters swarming towards them, and a new ally by their side, the party makes its escape from the underground facility. Will they make it out of the maintenance levels intact? More importantly, will they finally solve the riddle of the mystery square?

Aracyne fails to develop psychic powers. Grickx fully comprehends things that would shatter other mortal minds. Wealthy's university education fails her. Vons handles a job interview in one of the weirdest ways possible. A joke so terrible it has to be bleeped out is made.

Check us out online! We're at https://primaryattribute.com/