Quality Coffee Podcast

Having a podcast is a little bit like having a public online journal available to anyone to read through. Of course we knew that getting started but what we didn't realize was we'd have a way to witnessing scale our growth as humans week by week. Sometimes we edit episodes and are already different people than the two elder millennials who recorded it.

Like anything, starting a new project requires new skills and our included developing the right tone and the right temperature for us to feel like these unscripted conversations were authentic and raw, as intended. Episodes were deleted, some were heavily edited... and then after a while they weren't anymore almost at all. We found our groove and realized a few things about Quality Coffee Podcast.

For Tonia and Vanessa, recording the episodes is therapy.

For our audience, it's a chance to weigh in about taboo topics and join the conversation. Once we publish an episode out into the world of midlife women seeking midlife clarity these episodes are no longer about or for us. They're for us all.

So grab your coffee and let's chat!

Us Elder Millennials are lucky to have the awareness we do to see bullshit for what it is but even we get trapped in the wild when we are preyed on for our insecurities. Girl, we are not broken. Perimenopause is not a disease, it is a transition. Our bodies are not failing us, they are doing everything in their power to protect and nurture us.

It's time to put work and effort into our mindsets.

It's time to get vulnerable and raw with our core girlfriends.

It's time to reconnect to our own intuition.

It's time to value our bodies exactly as they are. Right. Now.

You are amazing and worthy of every single cell in your body. The only noise you should be validating is 90's R&B, hip hop, the occasional boy band and maybe some Third Eye Blind.

And Quality Coffee Podcast, of course! Follow along, grab your quality coffee and join Tonia and Vanessa in the conversation!

It is true that making friends becomes a more difficult task as you get older. Is it as simple as commenting on someone else's shoes? The ice-breakers are great but then the small talk that happens after is what we all are dreading. Grab your quality coffee and join us for an honest talk about what social settings look and feel like in our current stage of mid-life. Tonia and Vanessa dive into what makes making friends uncomfortable and how they're coming up with ideas of ways to make a bigger impact with short-form conversations that don't feel so soul sucking. Is it possible?

Find out on today's episode of Quality Coffee Podcast.

Get your coffee and ket's chat.

We sure do love a good interview episode where we take turns asking some burning questions we've been wanting to know about each other. It's a great way to get to know your favourite elder millennial podcast hosts and we cover all the bases on today's show. Serious, silly and everything in between. If you're a 40-something woman entering your midlife we will break your heart and crack you up all in the same day. Ready? Buckle up and grab your coffee. It's time to join the conversation.

This episode is for the 40-something women who are entering their midlife era and are awake to the bullshit noise that is the shaming, dismissive media burying the wise women we worked for the first half of our lives to become.
We are not over the hill.
Our mid-sections do not need fixing.
We are not wearing the wrong clothes for our age. 

Our bodies are not supposed to look TWENTY!
WE ARE WILD AND FREE.
This era is about seeing through the cracks and looking past the societal pressures women have tried to smash through… well listen ladies, Elder Millennials are not going to lay down while we continue to spew hate and shame towards the women that, for the last two decades, were cat-called, desired (often to a fault), 

The only thing we are no longer capable of us bearing children.
It’s our time now to return to ourselves. We are going inward and walking down quiet, dusty and dark hallways we haven’t seen since our childhoods but this time we know the way and we’re back for good. We’re dusting, we’re decorating and we’re going to take over the world building empires right in plain sight.
We’re doing for our daughters. Our nieces. Our inner children. We are doing it for one another.
This isn’t a crisis. This is clarity. And if you forget, we’ll be right here to remind you.
It’s time you joined the conversation.

Grab your coffee and let’s chat. 

What could we possibly have to say about love languages?

Tonia and Vanessa have put a lot of work into understanding their own love languages and talk a lot in this episode about meeting others' love language needs also.

Which love language speaks to you?

Do you know the love languages of your spouse?

Do you know the love languages of your kids?

Do you know the love languages of your friends?

Having vulnerable conversations with the people in your life sure helps form better quality relationships filled with secure attachment (see Ep.5 of QCP: Attachment Styles) and trust. Your relationships will be much more fulfilling and a nurtured friend, spouse or child always reciprocates in kind.

Explore these love languages with us:

- Quality Time

- Physical Touch

- Acts of Service

- Words of Affirmation

- Receiving Gifts

Some of these we resonate with and others either don't impact us much or can even have negative responses. Deep dive with us into this conversation. Grab your coffee and let's chat!

Tonia and Vanessa discuss ways we can support up-and-coming generations, setting them up in ways where healing is basic decency. Instilling a standard level of being treated and accepting the treatment of other people means teaching our kids to say, "that’s not ok that you said that to me" or "that's strange that you said that out loud".

Dehumanizing conversations, as the great Brené Brown discusses, includes cruelty such as name calling, discriminating, or treating others immorally and is not to be tolerated. Full stop.

Tonia and Vanessa are passionate about teaching the next generation, so this unscripted and vulnerable conversation is about leading by example. We look forward in a way that is hopeful so we can change how we speak to other people and also is one more way we can break generational trauma cycles in our family systems.

This is the start of many subsequent conversations to come.

It's time for all elder millennials to join the conversation. Grab your coffee and let's chat.

Tonia and Vanessa deep dive into what regret means as 40-something women and how to view life through the lens of aging as a privilege and opportunity.

They believe authenticity plays a huge role in making sure the decisions you make align with your core values. If you're always making decisions from a place of clarity you might find a deeply rooted sense of peace about how your life unfolds.

Find out what regrets they've had, how they worked through them and how this particular topic influences the making of Episode 36!

How do you feel about regrets? Do you have any?

Ps. Follow Quality Coffee Podcast for new episodes every

Listen in and join the conversation. Grab your coffee and let's chat.

This conversation is an extension of so many we've had in previous episodes where we deep dive into how women process information and emotions. We recognize in our forties so many of the things we're scorned for or made fun of about.. is a function with great purpose. Women talk to work out their thoughts (get it? Thought process....) and often it takes a few runs through to finally find the other thing to the chain. Aha!

We know from Episode 26 that we can't expect one person to meet all of our needs.

We know from Episode 34 that strangling our relationships wasn't the way to go and that they ebb and flow through seasons and compassion.

So how do we process? And with who?

Help us and join the conversation! Grab you coffee, let's chat.

Listen as Tonia and Vanessa talk through the lessons they’ve learned as midlife unravels the intricacies of relationships. Throughout this transformative time in our lives we begin to understand how to have healthy adult relationships with the friends and family in our lives. We stop strangling out of fear and anxiety because we are no longer living in survival mode. We can see things more clearly as we work to live more in our peace than in our chaos. Midlife reveals how each of our relationships offers value and we are sinking more into that value and allowing everything else to be what it is. Take it or leave it.
And do you know what has happened?
We’ve made space for love to exist where once it might have felt forced. Relationships are feeling abundant. Our needs are being met, and our relationships are thriving. 

This episode also dives into a midlife book we’re listening to on audible that helps to make sense of stepping into our forties and beyond with a new idea. We gain so much clarity in this time because for the first time life is truly about coming back to ourselves. You need you. Perimenopause is meant to bring us back to ourselves, recognize there isn’t anything to fix but instead embrace with love and compassion. There is nothing to fix, we are not broken.
Au contraire, marketing works against the midlife woman telling us about our decline and all of the ways we can fix what’s wrong with us. It’s our important job to share our truth to help shift the narrative from viewing midlife women negatively to the beautifully slow transformation back to our own peace. When you’re sold a sad, scary story about becoming “old” and invaluable you aren’t prepared for what’s actually happening. Perimenopause is for you. Your second half of your life is all yours. When you know that in your soul you pour into yourself in ways you never have before and everything else blossoms around you because of it.
This is an important conversation starter! So grab your coffee and let’s chat.