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In today's episode, we look at the concept of Invisible Consequences, why they make habit change so difficult and 2 practical things you can do to overcome this problem.

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One of the most fundamental and powerful tools to quit porn addiction (or any addiction, really) is to create a plan for how to deal with urges. Because let's face it: when you quit, it won't just be smooth sailing. You WILL experience the urge to relapse. You WILL get triggered. And if you don't have a plan in place that you made in advance of that happening, your chances of success are low.  

In this episode, we're looking at exactly what you need to do to formulate your own "if-then plan" and make sure you can deal with whatever urges hit you.  

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Chapters:

00:00 Intro

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You're in a relationship and you have an unhealthy habit of using pornography? It's perhaps already caused some issues for your with your partner, maybe also in the bedroom... and you're ready to quit porn. 

What do you need to know about how to best quit porn while you're in a relationship with your girlfriend or wife? What's different for partnered guys, compared to single guys?  This question was asked by some guys in the community, so here's my comprehensive guide.  

Note: all of this is coming from the perspective of a man (the porn addict/quitter) who is in a hetero, monogamous relationship with a woman. Many of these same ideas will apply to other relationship configurations as well, but the hetero one is the only one where I can talk from my own experience.   

Topics in this episode:

00:00 Intro

As mentioned in the episode, I don't cover every strategy and tactic here, only the differences between single and coupled guys trying to quit. If you aren't familiar with the QuitByHealing method yet, these videos are a good starting point:  

- 2 things you must know to quit porn: https://youtu.be/sVCbBgS1Pe8

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In this episode, you'll discover the 3 distinct stages you go through as your quit your porn addiction and rebuild better habits and a better life. Why 3 stages? Because what works in one doesn't necessarily work in the others. So without a framework like this, you could end up feeling stuck even though you seemingly do everything right. We'll also discuss the importance of being aware of your intention and how you can catch your "addict self" before you fall into a full relapse.

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Today, we're looking at a problem that includes pornography addiction, but also goes FAR beyond it. Let's talk about how everyone's addicted to "dopamine dispensers" and what this is doing to our mood, mental health & motivation. We even get into some dating advice, in this episode. 

Do you know someone who's like Joey from this episode! Make sure to share this with them, you could save them a whole lot of pain and trouble.

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What is the PERFECT way to overcome porn addiction and heal your brain to reverse all the negative effects the addiction has on your life? If you ask this question in a NoFap community, you'll probably hear about "hard mode" and "monk mode". In this episode, I explain why these protocols don't go far enough and this is where Spartan Mode comes in. We'll run through the steps in this protocol. Don't mistake this for a random list of "do this" and "don't do that" - the protocol is carefully designed to put you into the optimal state for healing. To learn more details about all the steps in Spartan Mode, check out this video on my YouTube channel (https://youtu.be/XIJs36sHZo0).

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What we cover in this episode is twofold: we look at the "perfect", optimal protocol for quitting porn. But we also look at the reasons why "perfect" is sometimes not the right choice.

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Today, we're taking a closer look at the HEALING part of QuitByHealing. You'll discover what a huge difference it makes to include this in your process (yes, you can quit porn WITHOUT healing - but I don't recommend it) and I lay out the basic tools you need to start this healing process for yourself. If you are on the journey of kicking your porn habit and you want to gain a deeper understanding of this key aspect of addiction recovery, this episode is for you!

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What is the most important skill you can learn to improve your life? In this episode, you'll discover why it is the exact skill you need to learn to overcome porn addiction: self regulation.