Raising Private Money with Jay Conner

In today’s dynamic and unpredictable real estate market, savvy investors are turning away from traditional funding methods. High interest rates, tighter lending criteria, and fierce competition mean that relying solely on banks or conventional loans can leave promising deals out of reach. For those ready to think differently, creative financing offers a pathway not just to survive, but to thrive. This was the key theme explored in a recent episode of the Raising Private Money podcast, where Jay Conner sat down with veteran investor Mark Monroe, a man who’s structured more than $500 million in deals over a storied 30-year career.

An Unconventional Beginning

Mark Monroe’s story is one for the ages, beginning with a no-money-down mobile home deal he did at nineteen. As he recounts, he took lessons from a simple “We buy houses” sign campaign in his tiny Vermont hometown—a campaign that featured more hard knocks than immediate wins. But out of that rough start—complete with makeshift signs, municipal warnings, and creative negotiation—came a realization: the greatest opportunities in real estate aren’t in the properties themselves, but in how you structure the deals around them. His early experience with seller financing was a launching pad into a career built on turning challenges into opportunities.

The Power of Seller Financing

Why does seller financing stand out as such a potent tool? For Monroe, the answer is flexibility. Traditional banks are bound by rigid guidelines—if a borrower doesn’t fit the box, the deal is dead. Creative financing, and especially seller financing, allows investors and sellers to negotiate terms tailored to their unique circumstances. This becomes vital when dealing with self-employed buyers with complex finances, sellers with specific needs, or properties overlooked by standard lenders. It’s not just about avoiding red tape, but about crafting true win-win solutions.

And it doesn’t stop at getting into deals. Monroe highlights the often-overlooked world of secondary markets, where savvy investors can sell off mortgage notes to private individuals—think doctors or other professionals seeking solid, passive returns for retirement funds. This layering of strategies exemplifies the broader opportunities offered when you step outside the box.

The Art of Listening and Building Rapport

For many investors, the hurdle isn’t understanding creative concepts—it’s believing sellers would ever agree to them. Monroe dispels this myth by emphasizing the importance of rapport. “Think of it like a first date,” he advises. It’s all about trust. The willingness of a seller to finance a deal hinges not on scripts or tactics, but on a genuine connection and a sincere desire to solve the seller’s unique problem. Sometimes, that means inventing a way to cover a seller’s camper payments, as Monroe did in one particularly creative transaction. The lesson: listen deeply, understand motivations, and build solutions around people, not just properties.

Shifting Mindsets on Capital

One of the big stumbling blocks new investors face is the belief that you must have capital or excellent credit to play in the real estate big leagues. Monroe crushes that limiting belief, sharing how knowledge, creativity, and relationship-building matter far more. Many successful investors start with little more than a willingness to fail forward, learn, and hustle. Your “credit” is your character and your ability to keep your word—especially when raising and managing Private Money.

Jay Conner echoes this, stressing that Private Money is not about pitching deals, but about presenting opportunities for partners to earn attractive returns. It’s relationship-driven, people-centric, and built on mutual trust.

The Foundation: Mindset and Resilience

Underlying all great investor stories is a powerful mindset. Mark Monroe’s journey, which includes beating cancer, is a testament to resilience and a refusal to let setbacks define your destiny. The real secret isn’t in any one creative financing trick, but in the willingness to adapt, to push past failures, and to keep surrounding yourself with positive, growth-oriented people.

Final Thoughts

In a world where many are on the sidelines, paralyzed by fear of what they don’t have, the true winners focus on what they can create with the knowledge and connections they build. Whether you’re a newcomer or a seasoned investor, the message from the Raising Private Money podcast is clear: creative financing isn’t just a strategy—it’s the future of real estate investing.

If you want to break through your own barriers, start by learning to see opportunity where others see obstacles. Listen to the needs, master the art of structuring deals, and above all, adopt the resilient mindset modeled by Mark Monroe. With these tools, wealth in real estate moves from being a distant dream to an everyday reality.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. What key lessons did Mark Monroe learn from his very first real estate deal, and how did those lessons influence his later investing strategies?
2. Why does Mark Monroe believe seller financing is such a powerful tool for real estate investors, especially in today’s lending environment?
3. What misconceptions do many real estate investors have about convincing property sellers to carry financing, and how can investors overcome these misunderstandings?
4. How does building genuine relationships and trust with sellers contribute to successfully structuring creative financing deals?
5. In what ways can creative deal structures, such as subject-to and lease options, allow investors to close deals that others might walk away from?
6. What mindset shift does Mark suggest is necessary when raising Private Money, and how does presenting it as an opportunity change the dynamic with potential lenders?
7. How important is it to take care of Private Money lenders, even if a deal goes sideways, and what impact can this have on an investor’s reputation?
8. Why do so many investors falsely believe they need significant capital or perfect credit to get started in real estate, and how did Mark’s personal story challenge that belief?
9. What role do resilience and maintaining a positive mindset play in building a successful real estate business, according to Mark Monroe’s experiences as a cancer survivor?
10. Reflecting on the conversation, what practical steps can a new investor take to start thinking more creatively about structuring deals instead of just focusing on how to fund them?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. Mark Monroe’s First Deal Was in High School with Creative Financing
   Mark Monroe started his real estate journey at just 19 years old with no money, armed only with a Carlton Sheets course and homemade signs. He bought his first property—a mobile home—using creative financing and sold it with owner financing, all before truly understanding what he was doing.
2. Solving Seller’s Problem Unlocks Unique Deal Structures
   A memorable example shared was when a seller wanted $30,000 down to buy a camper. Instead of offering the full amount, the deal was structured so the seller took out a loan, and the buyer (Mark) made the camper payments directly, allowing a win-win scenario and a very low cash outlay.
3. Building Relationships Is the Secret Ingredient to Raising Private Money
   The episode emphasized that attracting Private Money isn’t about begging for funds, but about providing opportunities and building real relationships. Many investors make the mistake of thinking they’re asking for a favor, but in fact, they are giving lenders a chance to grow their wealth—sometimes leading to more offers for funds than deals available.

Timestamps:

00:00 Creative real estate strategies with Mark

05:39 First real estate deal experience

08:18 Real estate financing strategies

10:21 Building trust with sellers

15:57 Dad's wisdom and negotiation advice

17:01 Raising private investment funds

22:21 Taking care of investors first

23:39 Prioritizing client relationships

29:16 Planting Positive Seeds in Life

30:44 Connect with Mark Monroe 

https://www.Mark-Monroe.com   

32:21 Sharing the podcast for investors

33:54 Free guide for real estate investing 

Connect With Jay Conner: 

Private Money Academy Conference: 

https://www.ThePrivateMoneyConference.com 

Free Report:

https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport

Join the Private Money Academy: 

https://www.JayConner.com/trial/

Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money

Have you ever dreamed of building a multi-million dollar rental property empire—but thought your location, career, or lack of capital held you back? You’re not alone. For many, the idea of investing in real estate while holding a full-time job, especially in a high-cost city, seems impossible. Yet Brian Waters, a full-time fire captain in Los Angeles, shattered these limiting beliefs by assembling a $4.5 million rental portfolio spanning 25 properties—all in just four years.

In this episode of "Raising Private Money," Jay Conner sat down with Brian to learn how he did it and how you can too.

Necessity is the Mother of Invention

Brian’s journey began out of necessity, not luxury. After a career shake-up and transitioning into firefighting at age 33, he realized he might not be able to depend solely on his job long-term. Inspired by modeling successful people (including Jay Conner himself), Brian jumped into real estate investing—but quickly encountered the sky-high prices of California. That obstacle turned into an opportunity. Instead of waiting for ideal circumstances, Brian dove into out-of-state markets, treating distance as an advantage, not a barrier.

Overcoming the Fear of Investing Out of State

The thought of buying property hundreds or thousands of miles away intimidates most new investors. Brian admitted his fear that you somehow had to fall in love with the property, or that you needed to be there in person to truly know what you were buying. What changed his mind? Focusing on the numbers, not his emotions. He learned to rely on systems, contracts, inspections, and, most importantly, his team—especially property managers and tenants. Technology and relationships enabled him to scale without ever setting foot in most of his markets.

The Power of Having the Right System

For busy professionals, a streamlined, repeatable system is non-negotiable. Brian’s approach was simple but effective:

• Get clear on your "buy box." He defined precisely what types of properties and locations he would consider, down to zip code, price, and bed/bath count.
• Source deals (simply). He leveraged MLS listings using tools like Redfin and Zillow, proving that you don’t need complicated deal-finding strategies or expensive marketing.
• Analyze and act. By becoming an expert in his specific area and running conservative numbers, Brian minimized risk.
• Build a superstar team. He considers the tenant his top "teammate," followed closely by a reliable property manager and agent.

Funding: The Biggest Initial Roadblock

Almost every investor hits the funding barrier—Brian included. After realizing his savings would only buy a few properties, he faced the daunting prospect of running out of capital. The answer? Raising Private Money. By documenting his journey on social media, sharing his story honestly (not boastfully), and creating trust within his network, Brian attracted $1.5 million in private loans—many from people who approached him, not the other way around. He didn’t chase capital; he demonstrated value and solved other people’s problems, turning them into partners.

Action Over Perfection

Perhaps Brian’s biggest differentiator is his attitude: ready, fire, aim. He didn’t let analysis paralysis stall him. He took action, learned from setbacks, and kept moving. Some properties worked out well; others didn’t. He calls it an "ever-evolving thing," emphasizing that you’ll never have total clarity—but taking imperfect action is better than waiting for perfection.

Key Takeaways for Your First 30 Days

1.  Prioritize Landlord-Friendly Markets: Look for states with laws favoring property owners, affordable prices, and economic stability.
2.  Build Your Team from Day One: Don’t try to do it all yourself. Agents, property managers, and reliable tenants are invaluable.
3.  Share Your Journey: Let your network see what you’re doing. This opens doors for both deals and funding.
4.  Take That First Step: Don’t let fear or the pursuit of perfect timing stop you. Every seasoned investor started with a first, imperfect deal.

Brian’s story is proof that you can invest out of state, keep your day job, and overcome what you thought were insurmountable obstacles. The first step is always the hardest—but with the right system, a strong team, and a willingness to take action, you can have your first rental property under contract in 30 days.

Ready to ignite your investment journey? Revisit this episode and connect with investors like Brian. You have no excuse not to start today.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. What were the initial fears or challenges discussed about investing in out-of-state rental properties, and how were they overcome?
2. How did having a demanding full-time job as a fire captain influence Brian Waters’ approach to building his rental portfolio?
3. What systems and processes did Brian implement to effectively manage properties in markets he didn’t live in?
4. How important is building a reliable team, such as property managers and realtors, when investing out of state?
5. What criteria did Brian use to choose which markets to invest in, and why were those factors important to his success?
6. How did Brian approach the challenge of raising capital, and what strategies proved most effective in attracting Private Money?
7. What role did transparency and documenting his journey play in building trust with potential private lenders?
8. According to Brian, why is taking imperfect action often more important than waiting for the "perfect" moment or opportunity?
9. What mistakes do busy professionals commonly make when starting in real estate investing, and how can these be avoided?
10. How does focusing on win-win relationships with lenders and tenants benefit both the investor and those they work with?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. Full-Time Fire Captain, Part-Time Real Estate Mogul
   Brian Waters managed to build a $4.5 million rental portfolio with 25 properties—all while working a demanding job as a full-time fire captain in Los Angeles and without ever quitting his day job.
2. Invested Without Ever Visiting Most Properties
   Brian has only been to approximately four of his 25 properties in person and hasn’t even visited 80% of the states he invests in, relying entirely on technology, strong teams, and analyzing deals by the numbers rather than emotion.
3. Raised $1.5 Million in Private Money—Without Ever Asking Directly
   Brian successfully raised over $1.5 million in private funds to fuel his investments—not by pitching or chasing investors, but by authentically sharing his journey on social media, which organically attracted interested partners from his network.

Timestamps:

00:00 Building a rental portfolio remotely

05:47 Overcoming emotional real estate investing

08:48 Finding a mentor in real estate

11:46 Finding a Reliable Property Manager

15:15 Following other investors' footsteps

18:20 Dealing with real estate hurdles

22:21 Raising Capital Without Desperation

24:05 Overcoming obstacles in real estate

26:59 Impact of private lending on retirees

28:46 Connect with Brian Waters  

https://www.instagram.com/mr.brian.waters 

https://www.facebook.com/mr.brian.waters 

30:39 Encouraging to share the episode 

Connect With Jay Conner: 

Private Money Academy Conference: 

https://www.ThePrivateMoneyConference.com 

Free Report:

https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport

Join the Private Money Academy: 

https://www.JayConner.com/trial/

Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money Now?

It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at https://www.JayConner.com/Book 

What is Private Money? Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner

http://www.JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast 

Jay Conner is a proven leader in real estate investing. Without using his own money or credit, Jay maximizes creative methods to buy and sell properties with profits averaging $86,000 per deal. 

#RealEstate #RealEstateInvesting #RealEstateInvestingForBeginners

***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

https://www.youtube.com/@DealMachine                                                 

“How to Raise Private Money WITHOUT Asking For It feat. Jay Conner | Thought Leader Spotlight”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=soyepl3KZ1A&t=34s     

If you’re a real estate investor, you’ve undoubtedly heard that access to capital is one of the greatest challenges—and most crucial factors—in growing your business. While many investors rely on banks or hard money lenders, the world of private money offers a game-changing alternative. In a recent episode of the Raising Private Money podcast,  together with Matt Kamp, Jay Conner, the Private Money Authority, who’s raised over $8.5 million from 47 private lenders, shared his strategies for raising private money without ever “asking” for it.

Whether you’re just getting started or looking to expand your real estate portfolio, here’s a breakdown of the key insights from Jay Conner’s conversation with Matt Kamp that can help you leverage private money for maximum impact.

Understanding Private Money: What Sets It Apart?

First, it’s essential to clarify what private money means—and, just as importantly, what it does not mean. In Jay Conner’s definition, private money lending is not hard money. Hard money lenders typically pool funds from private individuals and lend out of that fund, but when Jay Conner talks about private money, he’s referring to direct relationships with individual lenders—people just like you, who may want to loan money for a secured, solid return.

Private lenders often use one of two sources:

• Their investment capital (personal savings or investment accounts)
• Their retirement funds, often via a self-directed IRA

Unlike joint ventures or partnerships, private lenders do not take equity in your deals. Instead, they have the same legal protections as a traditional mortgage lender—their loans are secured against your real estate, not unsecured.

The Warm Market: Where to Find Private Lenders

So, where do you find these lenders? Jay Conner breaks this down into three categories:

1. Warm Market: People you already know—friends, family, colleagues, fellow churchgoers, social media connections.
2. Expanded Warm Market: Connections of your network and people you get to know through networking (the more you “wallow in money,” Jay Conner says, the more it sticks to you!).
3. Existing Private Lenders: Individuals already lending on other investors’ deals—which you can identify through public documents like mortgage filings or by networking at real estate events.

Your cellphone and social circles are goldmines: Every retiree, professional, or financially savvy contact could be a potential lender.

The “Teacher Hat” Approach: Educate, Don’t Beg

Jay Conner’s twist is that he’s never asked anyone to fund a deal directly; instead, he educates his network about what private lending is and what his program offers. Here’s how:

• Make a List: Start with your top 50 contacts, focusing on retirees or those unhappy with stock market volatility.
• Lead with “Did You Know?” Questions: For example, “Did you know there’s a way to earn unlimited tax-free income with your IRA?” This opens conversations about self-directed IRAs and private lending.
• Present a Program, Not a Plea: Don’t ask for money. Teach your contact what private lending looks like, the returns, protections, and process. Position yourself as an educator.
• Follow a Two-Step Process: Teach first, then (in a different conversation) call with a specific deal, stating, “I can now put your money to work on XYZ property. Here are the instructions.” This confident script ensures you never sound desperate.

Benefits of Private Money: Control and Flexibility

Why go to all this trouble? The advantages are numerous:

• No credit or lengthy bank approvals: Underwriting is based on the deal’s merits.
• Flexible payback: Structure no monthly payments and accrue interest.
• 100% financing—including renovations: Bring home a check at closing instead of putting cash in.
• **Use funds for any real estate asset, including single-family, multifamily, office, and land.

Automating Your Real Estate Business

Jay Conner also delved into building and automating a lean business. Get your core team in place first (real estate attorney, realtor, home inspector, and, if needed, an appraiser), and consider hiring acquisitionists and virtual assistants trained by professionals.

The Takeaway

Raising private money is about confidence, education, and positioning. By becoming a resource and teaching your network—not selling to them—you create win-win opportunities, never have to beg for deals, and can fund unlimited growth.

Want a deeper dive? Download Jay Conner’s free “7 Reasons Why Private Money Will Skyrocket Your Real Estate Business” guide at www.JayConner.com/Moneyguide. Your first private lender could be one conversation away.

 10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. How did Jay Conner's background in manufactured housing influence his approach to real estate investing and private money?
2. What were the key factors that pushed Jay Conner to seek out private money, and how did he view the financial crisis as an opportunity?
3. Jay Conner mentions never asking anyone for money directly. What strategies does he use instead, and why do you think they’re effective?
4. How does the concept of “putting on your teacher hat” transform the private money conversation, according to Jay Conner?
5. What role do self-directed IRAs play in raising private money, and why are they significant for both investors and lenders?
6. Compare and contrast private lenders and hard money lenders as explained by Jay Conner. What makes their approaches and relationships different?
7. Matt Kamp and Jay Conner discuss automation in real estate investing. What team members and systems does Jay Conner recommend to automate and scale a business?
8. In the process of engaging private lenders, Jay Conner emphasizes separating the teaching from the pitch. Why is this distinction important?
9. What documents and protections are essential for both investors and private lenders during a typical transaction, as described in the episode?
10. Based on Jay Conner's experience, what are the most common mistakes new real estate investors make when trying to raise private money or automate their business, and how can they be avoided?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. No Asking, Just Teaching: Jay Conner has never asked anyone directly for money to fund his deals. Instead, he educates his network about private lending and lets opportunities present themselves, using what he calls his "teacher hat" approach.
2. Zero Missed Opportunities: Since discovering private money in 2009 after his traditional funding dried up, Jay Conner has never missed out on a real estate deal due to a lack of funds.
3. Automated Success: Jay Conner nets over seven figures annually while spending only about five hours per week on his real estate business, thanks to automating and delegating nearly every aspect of his operations.

Timestamps:

00:00 Introducing Jay Conner, Real Estate Expert

05:28 Finding and landing your first deal

07:00 Explaining private lending basics

12:38 Discussing unlimited tax-free earnings

14:31 New investor phone call script

17:51 Insurance and private lending benefits

21:20 Real estate team essentials

24:14 Automating with virtual assistants

27:34 Free private money guide download

Connect With Jay Conner: 

Private Money Academy Conference: 

https://www.ThePrivateMoneyConference.com 

Free Report:

https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport

Join the Private Money Academy: 

https://www.JayConner.com/trial/

Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money Now?

It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at https://www.JayConner.com/Book 

What is Private Money? Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner

http://www.JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast 

Jay Conner is a proven leader in real estate investing. Without using his own money or credit, Jay maximizes creative methods to buy and sell prop

***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

https://www.youtube.com/@redknightproperties                                                

“Using Private Money Lending In Real Estate With Jay Conner: Discovering Multifamily Episode 219”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZTkJJ-_osE&t=2s     

In the world of real estate investing, access to capital is often the deciding factor between missed opportunities and closing profitable deals. Traditional institutional lenders—banks and credit unions—have long been the go-to sources for financing. However, a growing number of investors are discovering the unique advantages of private money, a strategy that shifts the power dynamic, puts the borrower in the driver’s seat, and opens doors to greater financial success.

What Is Private Money?

Unlike institutional lenders, private money comes from individuals—friends, family, business associates, or even strangers you meet through networking events—who have capital they’re looking to invest for solid, predictable returns. As described by Jay Conner, private lending isn’t about seeking out banks; it’s about finding people who want their money to work as hard as they do. This capital can be sourced from investment funds or retirement accounts, such as self-directed IRAs, making it accessible to a wider pool of interested lenders.

Why Choose Private Money Over Banks?

The benefits of using private money are compelling and multifaceted:

1. You Make the Rules

When working with private lenders, the borrower sets the interest rate, the term of the note, and other critical terms. This is a stark contrast to banks, where all the rules—including interest rates and loan terms—are dictated by the lender. Greater flexibility means deals can be structured in a way that best serves the investor’s needs and decouples real estate growth from the constraints of rigid institutional processes.

2. No Lending Limits

Banks often impose “caps” on how much they’ll lend to a single investor—sometimes severely limiting growth. Jay Conner recounts only having a $1 million line of credit from his bank, which quickly hamstrung his ability to scale. With private lenders, there’s no institutional ceiling. Jay grew his network to 44 private lenders and now manages $8.5 million in private money, rapidly recycling it across multiple deals.

3. No Money Out of Pocket at Closing

A major advantage of private money is the ability to finance 100%—or even more—of project costs, including renovations. Banks typically require down payments (“skin in the game”), but private lenders can fund the full purchase price plus rehab costs, often providing the borrower a check at closing to cover renovations and other needs. This allows for improved cash flow and removes the hurdle of large upfront capital requirements.

4. Speed and Simplicity

Private lending can move much faster than banks, which often get bogged down in paperwork, appraisals, and long approval processes. This agility lets investors act on deals quickly and beat out competitors.

5. No Personal Guarantees

Perhaps one of the most overlooked benefits is the lack of personal guarantees with private money; the property itself is the security, which means your personal assets are protected. This is a crucial risk-reducer for investors building a portfolio.

Who Uses Private Money?

Private money is remarkably versatile—it’s not just for those rejected by banks. In fact, seasoned investors with stellar credit use private money to keep themselves in control, move quickly, and maximize leverage, whether they’re securing single-family homes or syndicating multimillion-dollar apartment complexes.

How To Find Private Lenders

Building a private lender network is less about pitching deals and more about education and relationships. Start with your “warm” network—people you already know through business, community groups, social connections, or local organizations like Rotary. Expand your network by attending community events, joining local clubs, and participating in self-directed IRA networking opportunities.

As Jay Conner emphasizes, the key is to educate, not sell: teach contacts about private lending, show them how they can earn attractive, secure returns, and let their interest naturally lead to funding. By putting on your “teacher hat,” you’ll build trust and create win-win relationships.

Conclusion

Private money has the power to skyrocket your real estate investing business while granting you unparalleled flexibility and security. By taking control of your financing and cultivating a robust private lender network, you can seize more opportunities, solve your cash flow challenges, and accelerate your journey to wealth. Ready to get started? Download Jay Conner’s free guide, “7 Reasons Why Private Money Will Skyrocket Your Real Estate Investing Business,” at www.JayConner.com/MoneyGuide. 

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. What are the main reasons cited for using private money over traditional bank financing in real estate investing?
2. How does the flexibility of private money, such as setting your own interest rates and loan terms, compare to the restrictions imposed by banks?
3. Can you discuss the pros and cons of never needing to bring your own money to the closing table when using private money?
4. In what real estate asset classes can private money be utilized effectively, and how might deal structuring differ between single-family and commercial properties?
5. How does the process of raising private money through syndication for commercial projects differ from funding single-family properties individually?
6. What are the common sources or networks for finding new private lenders, and how important is personal relationship-building in this context?
7. How does educating potential lenders about private money differ from “pitching” them, and why does Jay Conner believe teaching is more effective?
8. What are the typical interest rates offered to private lenders, and how do these rates compare with those of institutional or bank financing today?
9. Discuss the role of self-directed IRAs in private lending, including the advantages for both lenders and borrowers.
10. What are the key risks and rewards for both real estate investors and private lenders in private money deals, including considerations of personal guarantees?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. Control Over Lending Terms: Jay Conner reveals that when using private money for real estate deals, the borrower sets the interest rate and loan terms—unlike borrowing from a bank, where the institution sets the rules.
2. No Limit to Private Money: There's essentially no ceiling to the amount of private money you can raise for your real estate projects; Jay Conner currently works with 44 private lenders and moves about $8.5 million from project to project.
3. Education First, Sales Second: Instead of pitching deals, Jay Conner wears his "teacher hat" to educate potential private lenders about the benefits and security of private lending—a strategy that naturally attracts funds without any hard selling.

Timestamps:

00:00 Why choose private money

04:58 Using private lenders for deals

08:44 Difference between single-family and commercial deals

13:01 Explaining private lending strategy

13:35 Finding Private Lenders with IRAs

18:51 Free Private Money Guide Download

20:42 Download your free money guide 

Connect With Jay Conner: 

Private Money Academy Conference: 

https://www.ThePrivateMoneyConference.com 

Free Report:

https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport

Join the Private Money Academy: 

https://www.JayConner.com/trial/

Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money Now?

It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at https://www.JayConner.com/Book 

What is Private Money? Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner

http://www.JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast 

Jay Conner is a proven leader in real estate investing. Without using his own money or credit, Jay maximizes creative methods to buy and sell properties with profits averaging $86,000 per deal. 

#RealEstate #RealEstateInvesting #RealEstateInvestingForBeginners

***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

https://www.youtube.com/@beyondthebuildpod                                               

“Real Estate Take Episode 34: Jay Conner and Raising Private Money”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=24HUY09_YWs&t=59s     

If you’ve ever considered diving into real estate investing but have felt overwhelmed by the complexities of funding your deals, you’re not alone. For many, the traditional path involves groveling before banks, wrangling with credit checks, and coughing up hefty down payments. But what if you could bypass all of that? In the latest episode of the Raising Private Money podcast with Jay Conner, the Private Money, you’ll discover how a shift in mindset—and strategy—can propel your investing business to new heights.

From Banker’s Mercy to Financial Freedom

Jay Conner’s story begins in eastern North Carolina, far from the bustling metros most associate with high-ticket real estate. After spending his formative years in his family’s mobile home business, Jay transitioned to single-family home investing in 2003. Like many, he started by relying on the banks, navigating mountains of paperwork and agreeing to terms that left him stressed and feeling “owned by the bank.”

Everything changed in 2009. The financial crisis hit, and his credit line evaporated overnight. Suddenly, Jay had deals under contract but no way to finance them. Rather than throw in the towel, Jay asked himself the powerful question: “Who do you know that can help fix your problem?” This turning point sparked his introduction to the world of private money.

The Secret Sauce: Never Ask for Money

You read that right. According to Jay, the secret to unlocking private capital is never asking for money—and never pitching a deal. Instead, it’s all about teaching and serving. Here’s how he breaks it down:

• Separate the conversation: Educate potential lenders about the opportunity with private lending, before ever pairing them with a deal. This avoids desperation and builds genuine trust.
• Offer, don’t beg: When it’s time to fund a deal, Jay makes what he calls the “good news phone call.” He simply informs the lender that he has a deal matching their criteria and tells them when and where to wire the money—no pleading required.

This methodical, service-driven approach means Jay never comes across as desperate. Instead of hunting for money in a frenzy to lock up deals, he has investors lining up, eagerly waiting to put their funds to work.

The Power of Nurturing Relationships

Jay’s model isn’t based on cold calls to strangers or high-pressure sales at REI clubs. It’s rooted in “the riches are in the niches”—working within his existing sphere of influence, especially in the tight-knit communities of his two-county market in North Carolina. Faith groups, neighbors, and longtime community members have proven to be his best partners. Not only do they see his track record up close, but their word-of-mouth referrals have helped Jay quickly grow his network of private lenders.

At its core, Jay’s system is replicable. He’s raised hundreds of thousands—even millions—of dollars from ordinary people: retired teachers, ex-military, young families, and even minors with inherited funds.

Making Private Lending Simple—and Legal

A major hurdle for many investors is the idea that private lending is complicated or legally risky. Jay demystifies it: private loans for single-family houses are “asset-backed debt,” not syndications, and thus not under SEC scrutiny for one-off deals. Private lenders can use both cash and retirement funds, like self-directed IRAs, which offer powerful tax advantages. Jay encourages investors to partner with reputable self-directed IRA custodians, making the process smooth for lenders.

Why Private Money Wins—For Everyone

Jay’s approach is all about “win-win.” Lenders get above-average returns backed by real estate, complete with security liens and insurance—protection they wouldn’t see in the stock market. Investors avoid the headaches of bank applications, origination fees, and personal guarantees, making every deal faster and more profitable.

Take Action: Learn the System

The episode closes with Jay offering invaluable resources: his best-selling book on private lending strategies, free tickets to his live conference, and access to his long-running “Raising Private Money” podcast.

Whether you’re a new investor or ready to scale, the lesson is clear: You don’t find money when you’re desperate—you build a network of educated, empowered partners before you need it. As Jay’s journey proves, the right process and attitude can turn a local, small-town business into a highly profitable, freedom-creating machine.

Ready to transform your investing business? Start building authentic relationships and teaching others the value of private lending—your “secret sauce” to lasting success.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. Jay Conner emphasizes that he never asks for money or pitches deals to his private lenders. What are the advantages and potential downsides of this approach to raising private capital?
2. How did Jay Conner's experience with losing his bank line of credit during the 2008 financial crisis influence his approach to real estate investing and funding deals?
3. The concept of "separating the conversation" when speaking to potential private lenders is presented as the secret sauce. How does this differ from traditional fundraising methods, and why might it be more effective?
4. Several times, Jay Conner discusses the importance of building trust and educating potential lenders about self-directed IRAs and private lending. What strategies does he use to foster trust, and how could new investors replicate this?
5. What are the specific benefits for lenders to use their self-directed IRA funds to invest in real estate deals rather than keeping their money in more traditional investments?
6. Desperation has a smell to it, Jay Conner says. How do desperation and urgency from an investor affect the success rate of raising private capital?
7. Jay Conner suggests that being a big fish in a small pond—focusing on a specific, smaller geographic market—can be more profitable than trying to compete in larger cities. Do you agree or disagree, and why?
8. The distinction between asset-backed debt and syndication is discussed. Why might an individual investor choose one method over the other, and what are the regulatory implications?
9. Jay Conner's system is described as repeatable and dependable, leveraging automation and systems to reduce his workload. How important are systems for scaling a real estate business, and what elements would be essential to include?
10. Based on Jay Conner's experience, what is the most effective way to attract and secure commitments from private lenders? What can new investors learn from his story about his first $500,000 in private capital?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. Jay Conner Raised Nearly $1 Million at Lunch
   Jay Conner’s first private lender luncheon resulted in $969,000 pledged from just one event, where he invited 20 people—including his realtor, CPA, and attorney—for a simple lunch and a PowerPoint presentation about private money.
2. He’s Never Pitched a Deal or Asked for Money
   Jay credits his “secret sauce” to never directly asking anyone for money or pitching a deal. Instead, he focuses on educating people about the opportunity and letting them come to him, which has led to 47 private lenders funding his real estate investments.
3. Minor Children as Private Lenders
   Some of Jay’s private lenders have been under 18 years old. These minor children became lenders after inheriting money from their grandparents, with their parents seeking a better return on those funds by investing in Jay’s real estate projects.

Timestamps:

00:00 Jay Conner's real estate journey

04:07 Shifting from mobile homes to houses

09:16 Calling Jeff for financial advice

10:58 Learning About Private Money

15:21 Hypothetical role play for investing

19:16 Conservative investing approach discussion

22:19 Switching to private lenders

25:57 Asking for investment referrals

28:01 Doubling investor funds quickly

31:49 Using private money in real estate

35:54 Using retirement funds for real estate

37:52 Understanding Self-Directed IRAs

42:52 Contact information and final thoughts

***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

https://www.youtube.com/@RawandRelentlesswBoDePaoli-d2f                                              

“How Jay Conner Raises Millions Without Banks or Hard Money”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DvcXxvSQW8&t=11s    

When it comes to real estate investing, adapting to changing markets and leveraging innovative strategies can separate the average investor from a true powerhouse. In the recent Raising Private Money podcast, renowned private lending expert Jay Conner shared a revealing behind-the-scenes look at how he navigates today’s tough real estate landscape, uncovers valuable off-market deals, and consistently secures funding without relying on banks or hard money lenders.

The End of MLS Deals – And the Shift to Off-Market

After 22 years of investing in single-family homes in Eastern North Carolina, Jay Conner has seen the market evolve. He explained he hasn’t bought a single-family house listed on the MLS with a realtor in over five years, a change accelerated by the disruptions of COVID. Instead, he now focuses entirely on for-sale-by-owner properties that are off the market, which he describes as “potentially motivated sellers” that other investors simply aren’t reaching.

Why this focus? The competition for on-market properties has become fierce, with TV shows and increased awareness drawing more people into the flipping game. To stay ahead, Jay targets sellers who aren’t working with agents and may be facing distress or unique life circumstances.

Where Do Today’s Deals Come From?

To consistently find off-market deals, Jay Conner emphasizes three main strategies:

1. Direct Mail to Families Facing Foreclosure
   Since 2004, Jay has tracked families facing foreclosure and sends a series of eight direct mail letters spaced three days apart, offering solutions rather than taking advantage of their situation. Most of these properties, he notes, end up selling on terms “subject to the existing note,” a technique allowing acquisition without immediate large investments.
2. Inherited Properties
   Jay also targets property heirs through direct mail, running a campaign that stretches 90 days apart over two years. The messaging is tactful, never directly mentioning inheritance, and simply offers to buy the home should they be interested.
3. AI-Driven "Driving for Dollars"
   Technology is rapidly shifting the marketing game. Jay recently began using an AI-powered service that scours Google Maps and Earth for signs of property distress—everything from roof issues to unkept yards—assigning each property a score. Direct mail is then targeted specifically to properties most likely to need a quick sale.

Leveraging Private Money – No Banks, No Hard Money

One of the biggest hurdles in real estate is access to capital. Jay’s story illustrates how traditional funding sources can dry up overnight—he shared how his local bank cut off his line of credit without warning in 2009, despite years of successful business. This crisis forced him into new territory: private lending.

Instead of chasing, begging, or negotiating with banks and hard money lenders (who charge 12%-14% plus origination fees), Jay built a network of individual private lenders—people in his own community, at his church, or in his cell phone contacts—offering them predictable, attractive returns at 8%, with no points and no fees.

How does he attract these lenders? He positions himself as a “teacher,” educating would-be investors about the opportunity and how they can use vehicles like self-directed IRAs to fund his deals safely and often tax-deferred or even tax-free. Importantly, he separates the conversation about the opportunity from the specific deals, avoiding any whiff of desperation and letting the quality of the program speak for itself.

Embracing Automation and AI

Efficiency matters. Jay Conner has built his business so that he works less than 10 hours per week, thanks in part to powerful automations through CRMs like Go High Level, Zapier integrations, and even conversational AI that responds to and qualifies new seller leads within minutes. He’s currently testing AI services that can call, text, and follow up automatically—allowing him to scale outreach far beyond what a single team member could accomplish.

Lessons for Investors

Jay’s journey is a vivid example of why adaptability and an education-first approach matter. By targeting non-traditional sellers, building a local private lender network, and embracing tech innovation, he’s built a scalable, resilient business—not just surviving, but thriving as markets shift.

Whether you’re a new investor or a seasoned pro, the takeaway is clear: mastering the art of finding off-market deals and raising private money can change the trajectory of your career. And in an age of rapid automation and AI, keeping your marketing and funding strategies at the cutting edge is more important than ever.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. Jay Conner highlights that he hasn’t bought a property through the MLS in over five years, focusing instead on off-market, for-sale-by-owner deals. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this approach in today’s real estate market?
2. During the 2008–2009 financial crisis, Jay Conner switched from traditional bank financing to private money. How did this shift impact his business, and what lessons can be learned for investors facing financing challenges?
3. What are the key differences between private money and hard money lending, and why does Jay Conner prefer private lenders to institutional or hard money lenders?
4. The episode describes a teaching mentality when approaching potential private lenders. How does this strategy differ from traditional fundraising or sales pitches, and why does it work for Jay Conner?
5. Desperation is said to “have a smell,” and it’s recommended to separate conversations about lending programs from deal-specific asks. How can this mindset shift improve success rates in raising private capital?
6. With an average annual return of 8% for private lenders and no points or origination fees, what makes this deal attractive to everyday investors compared to more sophisticated or institutional opportunities?
7. The use of self-directed IRAs allows private lenders to invest using their retirement funds, potentially tax-deferred or tax-free. What are the risks and rewards of this strategy for both lenders and borrowers?
8. Jay Conner details multiple lead generation strategies, including direct mail to homeowners in foreclosure or inherited property situations, as well as leveraging AI and Google pay-per-lead services. Which method do you think is most effective in today's environment, and why?
9. The increasing role of AI in real estate marketing and lead qualification was discussed extensively, including the use of AI phone calls and messaging. How do you see AI transforming real estate investing and deal origination over the next five years?
10. Jay Conner suggests that technological advancements, like AI, will reshape roles in real estate investing rather than eliminate them. Do you agree with this outlook, or do you foresee significant disruptions to jobs and traditional roles in the industry? Why or why not?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. Zero MLS Purchases in Five Years
   Jay Conner revealed that he hasn’t bought a single-family home listed through a realtor or the MLS in over five years, instead sourcing all his deals off-market or directly from for-sale-by-owner opportunities.
2. AI Is Changing Real Estate Deal Hunting
   The episode highlighted a cutting-edge "AI Driving for Dollars" system that uses artificial intelligence, Google Maps, and Google Earth to identify distressed properties by analyzing images for 16 points of distress—completely revolutionizing how investors find off-market deals.
3. Creative Private Lending Education
   Jay Conner shared his unique "teacher hat" approach: rather than asking people for money, he educates them on private lending and self-directed IRAs. Notably, when he started, none of his 47 private lenders had ever heard of private money or self-directed IRAs, showcasing the power of education in building investment partnerships.

Timestamps:

00:00 Flipping houses in smaller markets

05:13 Facing a financial crisis

09:42 Separating opportunity from funding requests

10:42 Explaining self-directed IRAs

13:45 Pitching investment opportunities

19:14 Managing multiple renovation projects

21:12 Introducing private lending concepts

25:42 Using private money for real estate

28:11 Finding Off-Market Property Deals

30:38

***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

https://www.youtube.com/@pathofpro                                             

“Private Money Explained: How Ordinary People Fund Million-Dollar Deals | Ep 55 Path of Progress”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oSOxyfqOXp4&t=39s   

In the latest episode of the Raising Private Money podcast, the conversation focused on the critical role of private money in real estate investing, highlighting not only the technical aspects of raising capital but also the mindset and strategies that lead to success. Several points were raised, including the journey from traditional bank financing to building a thriving business rooted in private lending, and the importance of confidence, education, and serving others in this process.

Breaking Free From Traditional Financing

A key theme that emerged was the challenge and limitations of relying on traditional bank loans to fund real estate deals. Early in the discussion, it was revealed that institutional lending can be unreliable, as lines of credit can be shut down without warning, regardless of credit history or business track record. This pivotal moment forced a shift toward discovering and mastering private money, which became the foundation for a more flexible, resilient business model.

The Power of Networking and Education

The discussion explored how essential networking and continual education are in real estate. One concept discussed was the move from operating in isolation for the first six years to realizing the power of mastermind groups, conferences, and community. Exposure to new ideas—such as creative financing, lease purchases, and raising capital from private lenders—came from stepping out of the comfort zone and actively engaging with other professionals.

This transformation didn’t just result in new financial strategies, but also a substantial mental shift: confidence replaced fear, and teaching replaced selling. The conversation highlighted that by educating people in one's network about the opportunities in private lending—without desperation or pitching specific deals—trust and rapport are built, setting the stage for long-term, mutually beneficial relationships.

Separating Education from The Ask

Several points were raised, including the necessity of separating the educational conversation from specific investment requests. The process is about providing value first—explaining the security of asset-backed lending, the structure of promissory notes and deeds of trust, and how private lenders are protected by conservative loan-to-value ratios. When investors understand the opportunity and feel informed, the actual process of funding a deal becomes straightforward and pressure-free.

Desperation, it was noted, has a “smell” to it. Rather than approaching potential lenders with a deal that needs urgent funding, real estate investors are urged to build a queue of interested, pre-educated lenders who are ready to invest when an appropriate deal arises. This approach not only builds confidence but ensures speed and certainty in deal-making.

Protecting Lenders, Building Relationships

A key theme that emerged was the many layers of protection for private lenders: deeds of trust or mortgages, conservative borrowing (never more than 75% of after-repaired value), naming lenders on insurance and title policies, and keeping all investments secured and documented. These safeguards mirror the way banks protect themselves, but in a more personal, direct transaction.

Relationships are central. In-person meetings, such as private lender luncheons, and regular communication build lasting trust. The lender’s chief concern is knowing the real estate investor is reliable, knowledgeable, and ethical. As relationships deepen, investors often find themselves with more capital available than there are deals to fund—a reversal of the usual investor’s dilemma.

The Mindset Shift: From Asking to Serving

The conversation underscored a shift from asking for money to serving potential lenders. By positioning private money as a valuable opportunity for others and approaching each conversation as an educator and problem-solver, rejection and fear fade away. This service-based mindset attracts capital and makes the process of raising funds natural and scalable.

Conclusion

In summary, raising private money is less about hustle and pitches and more about confidence, education, and service. Through consistent networking, building authentic relationships, and providing clear value to others, real estate investors can access the capital they need—on their terms—while profoundly impacting the financial lives of those around them. The discussion explored how these lessons apply not only to real estate but broadly to leadership and business, where giving value first always leads to long-term success.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. The conversation focused on the importance of confidence when raising private money for real estate deals. What strategies were suggested for building this confidence, and how can new investors apply them?
2. One concept discussed was the difference between hard money and private money lending. How are these funding sources distinguished, and what are the advantages and disadvantages of each in real estate investing?
3. A key theme that emerged was the transition from relying on traditional banks to leveraging private money. What prompted this change, and how did it impact deal flow and business growth?
4. The discussion explored creative exit strategies for flipping properties, especially during market downturns. How does selling on lease purchase or rent-to-own work, and what benefits does it offer to investors and buyers?
5. Several points were raised, including the use of asset-backed debt to protect private lenders. What measures are put in place to ensure lender security, and why is this critical in building trust?
6. The role of networking, mentorship, and mastermind groups was highlighted as essential for investor success. How did building a community around real estate investing contribute to personal and professional development in the episode?
7. The process of educating potential private lenders was emphasized. What are the best practices for introducing private lending opportunities to individuals unfamiliar with them, and why is separating the educational and deal-specific conversations important?
8. The conversation touched on the concept of "lazy money." What does this term mean in the context of private lending, and how can investors identify and approach individuals with untapped investment capital?
9. A discussion on mistakes made by beginners highlighted the issue of pitching deals too aggressively. Why is it more effective to focus on education rather than selling, and how does this approach foster better relationships with potential lenders?
10. Looking at the overall mindset and personal growth discussed, how does taking ownership and maintaining a servant’s heart impact long-term success in real estate investing, according to the episode?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. Biggest Single Deal: The discussion revealed that a $900,000 single-family house was funded through private money from one retired school teacher, highlighting how everyday individuals can become significant private lenders in real estate deals.
2. Private Lender Luncheon Success: Hosting just one "private lender luncheon" resulted in raising over $900,000 for real estate deals, showing the power of group education and networking in quickly attracting investment capital 25:58.
3. Minimum Investment Flexibility: A minimum of $50,000 is accepted from new private lenders, which may not buy a house outright but can be used for renovations, demonstrating creative ways to involve lenders at various financial levels in real estate investing 35:07.

Timestamps:

03:22 Transition from mobile homes to flipping

08:45 Learning about private money

12:37 Navigating financial crises in real estate

15:55 Private money real estate strategies

18:46 Using lazy money for investment

23:11 Protecting private lenders in real estate

24:08 Understanding private lending basics

30:07 Setting up a self-directed IRA

31:39 Securing Funding from Alex

34:28 Setting minimum investment amount

37:34 Overcoming fear in real estate investing

40:43 Approach to Private Lender Meetings

45:01 Managing private lender queue

47:17 Talking to

***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

https://www.youtube.com/@eXpRealty                                            

“Real Estate Success: From Bank Rejection to $2M in 90 Days | Jay Conner’s Private Money Blueprint”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o0yMZaYE3fk&t=2s  

If you’ve ever faced the sudden loss of traditional funding as a real estate investor, you know the feeling: panic, frustration, and a moment of reflection about how to keep your business alive. This was the pivotal moment Jay Conner faced back in January 2009 when his long-standing line of credit was suddenly withdrawn—no warning, no backup plan. Yet rather than accept defeat, he pivoted to a new way of thinking: attracting private money. 

In the recent episode of the Raising Private Money podcast, Jay Conner joined Leo Pareja and shared the strategies and mindset shifts that not only saved his business but helped it thrive beyond what traditional financing could ever offer.

Shifting the Mindset: From Begging to Teaching

Jay’s first lesson is all about mindset. Too often, real estate investors approach raising capital with a sense of desperation, especially when a deal is at stake. As Jay puts it, “Desperation’s got a smell to it. The worst time in the world to be looking for private money is when you need it for a deal.” To avoid this, he repositions the investor from a beggar to a teacher—someone who introduces a new opportunity to people unaware of the private lending world.

Rather than chasing, persuading, or begging for money, Jay advocates for leading with a servant’s heart, exposing your network to the concept of private money, and teaching them what you offer well before you have a deal on the table. The secret sauce is to build relationships first and teach the program, not pitch individual deals. This approach means the money is ready and waiting, removing stress and shifting the power dynamic in your favor.

Structuring the Conversation

So, what does a real-life conversation look like? Jay suggests starting with your own network—people you go to church with, friends, family, and anyone with whom you already have trust. As he recounted, he approached a friend at church not directly to ask for money, but instead to ask for help referring others who might be dissatisfied with their investment returns. This “I need your help” approach piques curiosity and often leads to the person wanting to get involved themselves.

When they show interest, avoid the mistake of giving away all the details at once. Instead, share just enough to get them intrigued ("greed glands swelling," as Jay jokingly calls it), then sit down to teach them about the program: interest rates, security, and how their investment is protected. Only after they understand and are excited do you bring them a deal, using Jay's "good news phone call" script—a confident, matter-of-fact notice that their money can now be put to work.

Building a Pipeline: One-on-One and Group Presentations

Jay emphasizes that your initial private lenders often come from one-on-one conversations, but scaling up requires a broader approach. He suggests hosting "private lender luncheons," inviting people in your network to a group presentation where you teach the opportunity and answer questions, all without pitching specific deals. With this method, you can attract substantial sums—Jay raised nearly a million dollars from just one luncheon.

Additionally, using educational audio recordings, brief and tantalizing, can spur potential lenders to reach out to you, saving you from the traditional chase. Sharing insights about tax-free returns with self-directed IRAs is another way to open conversations and provide real value.

Adapting Strategy to the Market

The exit strategy for your deals—whether BRRRR, flipping, or lease-purchase—depends on current market conditions. Flexibility and market awareness give you more options to produce returns for your private lenders, maintaining their trust and excitement in continuing to invest with you.Final Takeaway

The best time to raise private money is before you need it. By serving and educating your network, you create a pipeline of ready funds and lifelong relationships, allowing you to move quickly and confidently on opportunities. Jay Conner's journey is proof that when traditional financing dries up, a shift in mindset and a focus on relationships can unlock a world of private money—and take your business to the next level.

For more in-depth strategies, check out Jay Conner’s book, podcast, or even attend his live events—details are available through his site and podcast channels.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. How did losing access to traditional bank financing act as a catalyst for discovering private money strategies in the stories shared?
2. What are the key differences between raising private money and securing funding from traditional institutions, as explained in the episode?
3. Why is it important to separate teaching about the opportunity from pitching individual deals to potential private lenders?
4. How does approaching private lender relationships with a “servant’s heart” impact the results, according to the speaker’s experience?
5. What are the main steps involved in the process of raising private money as described in the episode?
6. How does mindset influence success when seeking and managing private lender relationships?
7. The episode detailed a “good news phone call” script—what makes this approach effective in securing private funding?
8. What role does networking within your existing community and contacts play in sourcing private lenders, based on the examples given?
9. How should real estate investors adapt their exit strategies—like flipping versus holding—based on current market conditions?
10. What strategies for sourcing off-market deals were outlined, and how can investors apply these in today’s environment?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. The "Good News Phone Call" Script
   One of the most successful techniques described for raising private money is the use of a "good news phone call." Instead of asking if someone wants to fund a deal, the call is simply to inform them their money is ready to be put to work—a strategy that builds excitement and anticipation for the opportunity.
2. Private Lender Luncheons Yield Big Results
   A single private lender luncheon—featuring lunch at a local oceanfront club and a PowerPoint teaching session—brought in $969,000 in pledges, showcasing the power of group education over individual pitching.
3. Curiosity Builds Commitment
   Handing out a simple 16-minute audio recording, which purposefully never shares interest rates or deal details but just piques curiosity, converted an acquaintance into a $650,000 private lender—demonstrating that intrigue can be one of the best tools in raising funds.

 Timestamps:

00:00 Starting with traditional financing

04:10 Line of credit closed unexpectedly

07:50 First real estate seminar experience

13:14 Mindset and teaching private lenders

17:17 Telling Wayne about investment opportunities

18:06 Discussing interest rates with Wayne

22:29 Leo is eager to fund the deal

26:10 Introducing Private Money Concept

30:02 Shifting from lease to flip houses

32:52 Lender wants profit participation

36:25 Using Google and private money in real estate

38:36 Offering a free real estate book 

 Connect With Jay Conner: 

Private Money Academy Conference: 

https://www.ThePrivateMoneyConference.com 

Free Report:

https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport

Join the Private Money Academy: 

https://www.JayConner.com/trial/

Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money Now?

It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at https://www.JayConner.com/Book 

What is Private Money? Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner

http://www.JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast 

Jay Conner is a proven leader in real estate investing. Without using his own money or credit, Jay maximizes creative methods to buy and sell properties with profits averaging $86,000 per deal.

#RealEstate #RealEstateI

***Guest Appearance

Credits to:

https://www.youtube.com/@drsusiecarder                                           

“From Bank Puppet to Private Money Powerhouse: Jay Conner on Raising Millions Without Asking”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=clTxDN_uI4I&t=127s 

Have you ever dreamed of building a seven-figure real estate empire—without ever begging a bank? For many entrepreneurs, financial constraints and fear of rejection keep them from scaling their wealth strategies, especially when it comes to real estate. In a recent episode of the Raising Private Money podcast, Dr. Susie Carder sat down with Jay Conner—the "Private Money Authority"—to break down exactly how you can crack the code on creative finance and raise the capital you need, even if you’re just starting.

Flip the Script on Funding

Jay’s journey didn’t start glamorously. Back in 2003, he did things the hard way: big down payments, painful fees, and personal guarantees. Like many, he depended entirely on the bank—until the 2008 crash changed everything. 

Instead of quitting, Jay asked himself one key question: “Who do you know that can help fix your problem?” That single question laid the groundwork for his pivot into the world of private money—a move that ultimately helped him raise over $2.1 million in just a few months.

The Private Money Mindset

So what exactly is private money? There’s a lot of confusion around the term—many associate it with hard money loans, but as Jay clarifies, private money comes from individuals, not institutions. “A private money lender is a human being, just like you and me, who loans money to real estate investors either from their investment capital or retirement funds,” Jay explained. In contrast, hard money lenders are brokers who pool private dollars into a fund and then loan it back out at much higher rates and fees.

The real breakthrough? Stop asking for loans and start offering opportunities. The first step, Jay says, is to “own the real estate between your ears”—adopt the right mindset. You become a teacher, not a beggar. Lead with value, educate your network, and never make a desperate plea for funds. “Desperation has a smell to it,” Jay warned.

The Teaching Approach to Attracting Money

Jay’s approach is refreshingly simple: teach, don’t pitch.

1. Build Your Program: Have a clear process and attractive returns for your lenders.
2. Teach First: Focus on educating people about how they can earn high yields safely by lending in real estate—without ever tying the lesson to a specific deal in the beginning.
3. Separate Education from Deals: Don’t lead a conversation with a funding request; first, get them excited and informed.
4. Make the Good News Call: Once someone’s ready and has funds available, only then present a deal that fits the program they already understand and want.

One of Jay’s first private money conversations happened at Bible study. Rather than asking for cash, he asked a well-connected friend to refer anyone frustrated with low bank returns. Within minutes, that friend wanted to invest himself—and doubled his commitment by the next day, simply because he understood the opportunity.

Automate and Scale

The true power in Jay’s system isn’t just in raising money—it’s in setting up a business that doesn’t own your life. By focusing on the activities he loves (teaching, decision-making, and marketing experimentation) and outsourcing the rest, Jay runs a multimillion-dollar business in under 10 hours a week. The right CRM, virtual assistants, and team members make it possible.

Your Legacy and Impact

Jay’s play isn’t just about money; it’s about lasting impact. As he reflects, “Enough is never enough when it’s not about you.” Whether supporting charities or teaching others, he embodies a servant heart—helping others achieve both financial returns and life freedom.

Ready to Raise Private Money?

If Jay can do it, so can you. Start with mindset, step into your teacher hat, structure your offers, and focus on relationships over transactions. Want more? Grab Jay’s book “Where to Get the Money Now” at jayconner.com/book and check out his podcast, Raising Private Money.

Stop waiting for a bank’s approval—your empire is waiting for you to teach, steward, and succeed.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. What mindset shift did the guest recommend as the foundational first step for raising private money, and why is this shift so critical to success?
2. How did the 2008 financial crisis serve as a turning point in the guest’s real estate investing career, and what lessons can entrepreneurs learn from that experience?
3. In what ways does “private money” differ from “hard money,” and what are the advantages and disadvantages of each approach?
4. Why does the guest insist on never asking directly for money when raising private capital, and what techniques does he use instead to attract investors?
5. According to the episode, what are some key components to include in your private money program when educating potential lenders?
6. How does separating the education conversation from the funding request help avoid the appearance of desperation and lead to stronger results?
7. What are the critical numbers and formulas used to determine a good real estate deal when using private money, and how do those calculations change depending on price range?
8. Can you explain—using your own words—the concept of buying a property “subject to” the existing note, and in what situations is this strategy most beneficial?
9. What was the guest’s process for automating his business so that he could work less than 10 hours a week, and what lessons can attendees apply to their own ventures?
10. In the episode’s closing, the guest spoke about his legacy and motivation for continued work. How does having a larger purpose beyond personal wealth impact business decisions and fulfillment?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. "No Begging Banks" Philosophy: The main guest built a seven-figure real estate empire after 2008 without ever relying on traditional bank financing again. He famously told his bank, “Bless your heart,” and engineered a system to raise millions in private money—without asking for it directly! 
2. The Bible Study Lender: One of the guest’s first private money lenders was recruited at a Wednesday night Bible study. By simply asking this well-connected friend for referrals—rather than asking for money—he sparked enough interest to land a half-million-dollar commitment after sharing his investment program over coffee. 
3. Automated Empire, Minimal Hours: Despite handling a business that cycles millions, the episode’s real estate investor reveals that he now works less than 10 hours (truthfully, often less than 5 hours) a week in his business, thanks to automation, virtual assistants, and a rock-solid team structure. 

Timestamps:

00:00 Jay Conner's private money breakthrough

06:29 Regret of not having a mentor

09:59 Line of credit closure news

13:04 Learning about private money lending

15:40 Understanding private money basics

17:28 Understanding private money lending

22:17 Pitching real estate investment referrals

25:28 Setting up a self-directed IRA

29:42 Balancing work and personal life

30:24 Balancing business success and happiness

35:21 Calculating property renovation costs

38:14 Creative financing strategies

41:27 Creative real estate cash flow strategies

45:28 Raising capital without banks

48:50 Like, share, and business assessment

49:55 Episode outro and subscription reminder 

Connect With Jay Conner: 

Private Money Academy Conference: 

https://www.ThePrivateMoneyConference.com 

Free Report:

https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport

Join the Private Money Academy: 

https://www.JayConner.com/trial/

Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money Now?

It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at https://www.JayConner.com/Book 

What is Private Money? Real Estat

In today’s unpredictable economic environment, many investors are searching for ways to make their money work smarter and more safely. If you’ve ever wondered whether there are asset classes beyond the usual stocks, bonds, or even real estate—ones that thrive regardless of the market’s ups and downs—this episode of the Raising Private Money podcast featuring alternative investment specialist Patrick Grimes is for you.

Shattering the Status Quo: Beyond Traditional Investments

Most people’s investment portfolios are riding a rollercoaster, with assets that rise and fall together—think stocks, bonds, real estate, and crypto. According to Patrick Grimes, this herd mentality exposes you to more risk than you might realize. He highlights how even real estate, once considered a “safe bet,” moves in decades-long boom-and-bust cycles. 

So what’s the alternative? Patrick Grimes emphasizes the importance of non-correlated asset classes—investments whose value moves independently of mainstream markets. By combining recession-resilient, non-correlated, and AI-insulated assets, you can reduce your portfolio’s overall risk and weather downturns that devastate less diversified investors.

Unlocking Alternative Assets: Litigation Finance and More

One asset class that’s flown under most investors’ radar is litigation finance. Think of it as lending, but instead of loaning money against property, you’re providing capital to law firms or medical practices, secured by their assets and future settlements. 

These investments are compelling, Patrick Grimes explains, precisely because their returns are not tied to the same forces driving real estate or equities. If the broader market tanks, your portfolio isn’t automatically dragged down with it.

Other out-of-the-box sectors Patrick Grimes mentions include timberland, CPA firm revenues, energy, or even cash flow from owning airplane leases or bourbon barrel casks. Each operates on unique market fundamentals, offering opportunities for uncorrelated growth and income—key ingredients for true financial security.

Smart Investors Follow the “Playbook”

Patrick Grimes points out that the world’s wealthiest families, hedge funds, and private equity firms have mastered what he calls the “allocation strategy.” Instead of going all-in on real estate or tech, they divide their capital among diverse, recession-resistant, non-correlated assets. 

This isn’t about chasing fads. It’s about building resilience. As economic and technological disruption accelerates—think AI sweeping through industries—investors need to ask: Is this asset class at risk of becoming obsolete or easily automated? This kind of critical thinking, Patrick Grimes believes, is what keeps portfolios alive and thriving through the most turbulent times.

How to Get Started (and Avoid Major Mistakes)

Patrick Grimes’ journey wasn’t without setbacks. He lost everything in 2009 and again took hits when interest rates spiked. These experiences taught him to emphasize asset protection and tax efficiency first, before worrying about where to invest. 

His advice? Stop thinking you have to pick the single perfect sector. Instead, explore what’s out there, build up your investing knowledge, and diversify into nontraditional assets—ideally, ones with solid legal structures and tax advantages. If you want help learning what’s available and which opportunities might fit your own financial goals, Patrick Grimes recommends participating in an education series or one-on-one discussions to build your plan.

Conclusion: Take Action Before the Next Downturn

Waiting for the next crash to diversify is the riskiest move of all. By embracing strategic diversification—learning about and allocating to assets beyond Wall Street—you can transform your portfolio into something truly resilient. As Patrick Grimes’ story and his actionable frameworks show, it’s never been more vital to rethink what you’re investing in and why.

10 Discussion Questions from this Episode

1. What is litigation finance, and how does it differ from more traditional investment strategies like real estate or stocks?
2. How does the concept of non-correlation protect investors during market downturns? Can you think of real-world examples where this diversification strategy could have provided security?
3. Patrick Grimes emphasizes the importance of building a diversified portfolio across multiple industries. Why do you think so many investors stick to just stocks and bonds?
4. Why might legal and medical industries offer more stability and recession resistance compared to sectors like real estate or oil and gas?
5. How does Patrick Grimes define “financial security” versus “financial independence” or “financial freedom”? Do you agree with his distinction?
6. What role does AI disruption play in Patrick Grimes’s investment strategy for the next five to ten years? How should investors adjust their portfolios to mitigate this risk?
7. According to Patrick Grimes, which factors should investors consider before choosing a sector for their investments (excluding due diligence on specific opportunities)?
8. Discuss the allocation strategies outlined by Patrick Grimes—with half in traditional investments and half in alternatives. What are the advantages and potential drawbacks of this approach?
9. Patrick Grimes mentions missing out on early real estate opportunities as one of his biggest regrets. Have you experienced similar investment regrets or lessons learned?
10. After hearing Patrick Grimes’s views on passive alternative investments, how might you start researching or evaluating non-traditional assets for your own portfolio?

Fun facts that were revealed in the episode: 

1. Litigation Finance as an Asset Class: Most investors haven’t heard of litigation finance, but it operates much like private credit in real estate—only instead of properties, investors lend against legal or medical assets, providing recession-resilient opportunities that don’t move with traditional markets.
2. Learning from Loss: Patrick Grimes lost everything in the 2009–2010 real estate collapse, which drove him to adopt robust diversification strategies across multiple non-correlated asset classes, so he’d never be “all in on one asset” again.
3. Unique Investment Opportunities: Beyond mainstream assets, Patrick Grimes mentions fascinating alternative options—like investing in timberland, bourbon barrel casks, and even laundromats—each offering unique non-correlated returns for investors looking to diversify in unexpected ways.

Timestamps:

00:00 Private credit in various industries

03:39 Early career and engineering background

6:40 Connect with Patrick Grimes:

https://www.PassiveInvestingMastery.com  

08:38 Investment Strategy and Resilience

12:20 Gold and oil market correlation

15:05 Discussing business ownership and strategies

18:33 Strategic decisions in high-interest markets

20:37 Pivoting to Industrial Real Estate

25:35 AI disruption and industry risks

26:34 Evaluating Industry Risks and AI Impact

30:22 Patrick's journey and book offer 

https://www.PassiveInvestingMastery.com/Book 

33:27 Get your free investing guide 

 Connect With Jay Conner: 

Private Money Academy Conference: 

https://www.ThePrivateMoneyConference.com 

Free Report:

https://www.jayconner.com/MoneyReport

Join the Private Money Academy: 

https://www.JayConner.com/trial/

Have you read Jay’s new book, Where to Get the Money Now?

It is available FREE (all you pay is the shipping and handling) at https://www.JayConner.com/Book 

What is Private Money? Real Estate Investing with Jay Conner

http://www.JayConner.com/MoneyPodcast 

Jay Conner is a proven real estate investment leader. Without using his own money or credit, Jay maximizes creative methods to buy and sell properties with profits averaging $86,000 per deal.

#RealEstate #RealEstateInvesting #RealEstateInvestingForBeginners #Foreclosures #FlippingHouses #PrivateMoney