Restore The Glory Podcast

Jake & Bob are joined by Fr. Timothy Gallagher for a discussion on how discernment and healing go hand in hand. Fr. Tim is the author of the incredible book "The Discernment of Spirits" that teaches us how to utilize St. Ignatius' rules of discernment. He shares the process of discernment while Jake & Bob combine his knowledge with their expertise on healing. The process of healing and discerning God's will for us work beautifully together.

• Discerning what is from the voice of the Holy Spirit and what is from the voice of the evil one.
• The rules of St. Ignatius are an invitation to hope.
• "The more healing that can happen on both the physical and psychological levels, the harder the enemy's task becomes." -Fr. Tim
• The first step in discernment is to notice any movements, thoughts or stirrings of the heart. Identify whether it is from the good spirit or the bad spirit and then take the appropriate action. If it is from the good spirit, take it in and be guided by it. If it is from the enemy, reject it.
• The discernment process happens repeatedly throughout the healing process. It is continual and helps you know how to move forward.
• Our parents/guardians are the first representatives of God to us. We may often hear God's voice as our parent's voices which can either be positive or negative. If we believe lies about ourselves from our parents, we need to work through those so that we don't hear those lies coming from God's voice in our hearts. We need to invite Jesus' to speak His truth in our hearts.
• In times of desolation, never make a change.
• Renouncement prayer is a way to practically renounce lies and accept the opposing truths.

• Fr. Tim's book "The Discernment of Spirits"
• Fr. Tim's Discerning Hearts Podcast
• Free Discerning Hearts App
• Fr. Tim's website

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Jake and Bob continue their series on working through hopelessness to find hope. When we feel hopeless, we often avoid God because we feel ashamed, guilty or unloved. In these times we only see God as a judge, pointing out our failings. But God is also our Savior who loves us even in the places we feel unloveable. We can try to find hope through things or people but this will let us down. God is the only one who can provide us with the hope we desire. Our hosts walk us through how to find hope again through an Encounter with the God who loves us.

• Hopelessness closes our hearts to the Encounter with God.
• When the sickness of our lives becomes evident to us, we often only see God as Judge and not as Savior.
• Jesus loves us in the places we feel unloveable.
• Healing is a real encounter that brings us into wholeness, truth and communion.
• If you lose sight of the Savior, Christianity is meaningless.
• When we put hope in things or people that aren't God, they become idols, and idols will always disappoint us.

Spe Salve by Pope Benedict XVI (Encyclical)

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The season of Advent is a time of hope and waiting: preparing for the birth of Christ and welcoming Him into our hearts in a new way. But a season focused on hope can often reveal the places in our hearts that are hopeless. Jake and Bob kick off a new series on how to move from hopelessness to hope. They discuss how a lack of hope can often stem from a lack of trust, patience and intimacy with the Lord. Listen as they share some helpful shifts in mindset to grow in the virtue of hope this Advent season.

"The person who loves intimacy with Jesus will get farther in the healing journey than the person who just wants to be healed." -Jake Khym

• How the holidays and the Advent focus on hope can often reveal where we feel hopeless

• We need to desire relationship with Jesus even more than the healing He can give us. He wants to give us good gifts but desires our hearts more than all.

• A lack of hope can often come from a lack of intimacy and trust.

• Trust is the currency in the economy of relationship.

• "Gratitude is an antidote to hopelessness." -Bob Schuchts

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The seasons of Advent and Christmas can bring up difficult family dynamics in our hearts, as well as a deep desire for a more whole and holy family. In today's episode, Jake and Dr. Bob welcome Sr. Miriam James Heidland onto the podcast to talk about her new Advent devotional, "Behold" which touches on these dynamics through relationship with the Holy Family. The Holy Family provides a healing lens for us to discover new depths and completeness in our understanding of motherhood, fatherhood, childhood and our own family life. Links to the Behold weekly videos can be found in the resources section below.

Key Quote:

The hidden life at Nazareth allows everyone to enter into fellowship with Jesus by the most ordinary events of daily life - CCC 533

Key Points:

• Why Sister loves speaking about healing
• Family dynamics around Advent and the Christmas season
• Sister's new Advent book and how it draws us into relationship with the Holy Family and our own family relationships
• Reflections on Mary's motherhood
• Ideas on how to tangibly connect with the Holy Family
• The analogy of radio waves and how we can tune into the Lord's kindness and tenderness
• Jake, Bob and Sister share about sculpting the Holy Family and the safety that it creates
• The importance of receiving our identity in different stages of life (ie. husband, wife, parent) before giving from it
• The difference between someone who is simply giving to give, and someone who is giving in order to receive
• How can we embody the Holy Family for one another?

Practical Application/ Reflection Questions:

1. Which member of the Holy Family are you most drawn to?
2. Allow yourself to be loved by the Holy Family this Advent, especially inviting Mary to mother you and St. Joseph to father you.
3. Pray about how you can embody the Holy Family for others in your family this coming Christmas season.

Resources:

• Behold: A Guided Advent Journal for Prayer and Meditation, Sr. Miriam James Heidland (book)
• Trailer for Behold Advent series (video)
• Behold: Introduction (video)

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Episode 69: Forgiveness (Part 2)

restoretheglorypodcast.com/episodes/69

Show Notes:

In this incredibly practical and reflective episode, Jake and Bob walk listeners through a thirteen step process of forgiveness, offering guiding insights along the way. You may wish to find a quiet, prayerful place to listen to this episode in order to apply the exercises. We are praying for you!

Key Quote:

For with the judgment you make you will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get. - Matthew 7:2

Key Points:

• Surrender as part of the Christian approach to forgiveness
• Thirteen steps to forgiveness:
• Step 1: Ask the Holy Spirit to show you who you need to forgive.
• Step 2: Picture the person in front of you and pay attention to how you feel.
• Step 3: Make an account of the debt they owe you.
• Step 4: Imagine yourself telling them what they did to hurt you and how it has affected you. If you can, notice that this is not the person they were designed to be. Separate their dignity from the evil they have done.
• Step 5: Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you what you believe about yourself based on that incident.
• Step 6: Renounce the identity lies.
• Step 7: Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal the judgements towards the person who hurt you.
• Step 8: Renounce those judgements.
• Step 9: Ask Jesus to forgive the person. Invite the person to stand at the cross with you.
• Step 10: Forgive the person.
• Step 11: Pray a prayer of blessing over that person, ask God to bless them in the opposite way they hurt you.
• Step 12: Ask Jesus to seal his forgiveness and heal the wounds.
• Step 13: Thank God for his healing.

Resources:

• Forgiveness Meditation with Sister Miriam James Heidland
• Episode 12: Anatomy of a Wound (Part 1)
• Episode 66: Judgment, Mercy and Healing (Part 1)

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Forgiveness is not an easy topic. It's intimately connected to our hurts and areas that need healing. But forgiveness is also misunderstood. Building off the previous series on right judgment, mercy and healing, Jake and Dr. Bob begin a two-part series on forgiveness, diving into the etymology of the word, addressing our misinterpretations, and challenging us to look at how Jesus models forgiveness. They look at how forgiveness is the perfect marriage between right judgment and mercy, and go deep into the Catechism to unpack the spiritual and human reality of this virtue. Be prepared to pause, rewind and listen to this episode again and again.

Key Quote:

It is there, in fact, "in the depths of the heart," that everything is bound and loosed. It is not in our power not to feel or to forget an offense; but the heart that offers itself to the Holy Spirit turns injury into compassion and purifies the memory in transforming the hurt into intercession. - CCC 2843

Key Points:

• How right judgment and mercy combined equal true forgiveness
• Why dividing right judgment and mercy creates an awful reality
• The etymology of the word 'forgive'
• Why we hold on to unforgiveness
• Misinterpretations of what forgiveness is
• Reconciliation and restitution
• The pain and shame on both sides of hurt that can become identity lies
• Two powerful paragraphs from Catechism of the Catholic Church on forgiveness
• Forgiveness will not always be followed by restoration of the relationship
• The places we're not willing to forgive may be places where we've created idols in our lives
• Forgiveness and the connection with trust and surrender to God
• How forgiveness didn't diminish Jesus's dignity
• Applying what's been discussed to the sex abuse crisis in the Church

Resources:

• Catechism of the Catholic Church, para 2840
• Catechism of the Catholic Church, para 2843
• Episode 66: Right Judgment
• Episode 67: Mercy

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When we understand and exercise right judgement then we can offer and receive mercy, which leads to healing. Jake and Bob break down the role of mercy with helpful analogies and discussion to draw a more complete picture of healing. They also take a look at what happens when we get judgement wrong.

Key Quote:

Without the presence of the merciful Father, we are delivered up to our faults, without any possible remedy. There would be no forgiveness of error or sin. No place for weakness, frailty, or failure, all of which are nonetheless a part of our lives. - Fr. Jacques Philippe, Priestly Fatherhood

Key Points:

• Bob illustrates with examples how mercy cannot exist without right judgement
• The opposite of wrong judgement leads to false or cheap mercy
• Mercy is the what leads to healing
• A sound anthropology is needed for real healing
• Mercy is a combination of truth and love
• Hesed = an Old Testament word for God's mercy and love toward his people, an undeserved kindness and generosity
• Misericordia = a heart for our misery
• Jake and Bob share personal experiences of experiencing hesed and misericordia
• The importance of remembering our encounters with God's mercy
• Notice what captivates you, and notice what challenges you

Resources:

• Episode 66: Judgement, Mercy & Healing (Part 1) - Right Judgement
• Episode 14: Anatomy of a Wound (Part 3)
• Priestly Fatherhood, Fr. Jacques Philippe (book)

Connect with Restore the Glory:

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In response to the previous series on same-sex attraction, Jake and Bob begin a new series on Judgement, Mercy and Healing from a Catholic lens. The first topic on the table is Right Judgement as they address the tension between 'we have to judge' and 'we can't judge'.

Key Quote:

Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us - Matt 6:12

Key Points:

• Jake and Bob revisit some feedback from the series on same-sex attraction
• The umbrella of truth that underpins the entire podcast
• Catholic anthropology is the basis of good therapy
• Subjectivity as defined by JPII
• How the parable of the prodigal son illustrates Bob and Jake's approach to the podcast
• Defining right judgement and false judgement
• The tension between "we have to judge" based on objective truth and "we can't judge" because justice belongs to the Lord
• The important distinction between sharing truth and the way in which it's shared
• The backlash against judgement has manifested in the woke community
• Cancel culture
• What Scripture says about judgement

Resources:

• Anatomy of a Wound series

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Jake and Bob take time to debrief the series on Same Sex Attraction and address feedback from listeners.

Key Quote:

For our struggle is not with flesh and blood but with the principalities, with the powers, with the world rulers of this present darkness, with the evil spirits in the heavens. - Ephesians 6:12

Key Points:

• Jake and Bob address some listener feedback about the series
• The distinction between a pastoral approach and a philosophical or theological approach to the conversation
• Can heterosexual and homosexual sins be weighted the same?
• The denial of truth that's pervasive in our current culture
• Why it's problematic to apply the term 'conversion therapy' too broadly
• Bad therapy vs good therapy
• The difference between being 'value neutral', imposing an ideology or respecting a client's freedom in therapy
• Defining healing and the healing process
• Jake and Bob close with their hopes for this past season and a reveal of what's coming next

Practical Application/ Reflection Questions:

1. Did you experience a reaction of grief during any episodes in this series? Note when and why and spend some time in prayerful reflection.
2. Consider the distinctions presented between a pastoral approach vs a philosophical or theological approach to this topic. How do you find yourself more inclined to respond to others? Where might you need to adjust your approach to bringing more truth or more love to the conversation?
3. What's your response to Jake and Bob's distinction between 'good therapy' and 'bad therapy'?
4. Which guest did you appreciate hearing from the most and why?

Resources:

• Begin our series on Same-Sex Attraction here
• Living the Truth in Love: Pastoral Approaches to Same Sex Attraction, Janet Smith & Fr. Paul Check (book)

Connect with Restore the Glory:

• Instagram: @restoretheglorypodcast
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In this extended episode, Jake and Bob sit down with Christopher Dowling for a deeply nuanced conversation examining the the Catechism of the Catholic Church, 'camps' that exist around the Church's teaching on homosexuality, and how we can love one another while fundamentally disagreeing on how to approach same-sex relationships. Christopher came out as gay in 2018 and is currently engaged to be married to another man. He and Bob know one another from their time in shared ministry, and for the first time revisit how the events of 2018 affected them individually. This is a powerful conversation that we hope is one small step towards healing and relationship as we respectfully dialogue about grief and hope, doubt and faith, sadness and love.

Key Quote:

We stand in different camps, but where we can be united is in reverencing each other, and wanting to understand each other's heart. - Jake Khym

Key Points:

• Christopher shares his background in the Church, including several major ministries that he's worked for or spent time with
• Jake and Christopher define what sort of 'camps' they see emerging in the conversation around Church teaching and homosexuality
• Christopher shares his experience of 'coming out' and choosing to pursue relationships with men
• Jake pauses the conversation to assess how people may interpret the questions that he and Bob are posing to Christopher
• Christopher and Bob speak for the first time about how they both felt when Christopher came out in 2018
• The men take time to address the personal and unique grief and hurt that is at the heart of much conversation around homosexuality and the Church, and how we can do better to listen to one another
• Christopher answers the common question, 'How can I love you without compromising my beliefs?'
• Christopher speaks to the difference between accepting vs affirming
• The men unpack how the pastoral tone changes around this topic when we're in relationship with each other and truly 'sitting across the table' instead of in a faceless forum
• A discussion ensues about paragraph 2357 in the Catechism of the Catholic Church that references the unexplained 'psychological genesis' of same-sex attraction and the 'great variety of forms' it has taken throughout history
• The episode concludes, as Christopher puts it, with lingering feelings of doubt, grief and sadness, but simultaneously faith, hope and love

Practical Application:

1. Do you find it difficult to listen to and receive someone who has an opinion or lifestyle that's different from yours? Practice having a conversation with someone you love without interrupting them to share your own opinion right away.
2. Pay attention to how you feel throughout the episode. What emotions come up for you? Do you feel defensive or grieved by anything that is said? Do you feel encouraged? Consider your involuntary feelings and allow yourself to feel these things without jumping to immediate conclusions.

Resources:

• Catechism of the Catholic Church para 2357

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