In this episode of Rewired Sober, I sit down with Michelle Folan, certified health and nutrition coach and host of the globally ranked podcast Asking for a Friend. Known for her no-BS, sassy approach to midlife wellness, Michelle helps women over 50 lose fat, build strength, and reclaim their vitality using evidence-based fitness, nutrition, and lifestyle strategies.

Michelle shares her personal journey with alcohol, from corporate entertaining and pandemic drinking to her realization that moderation wasn’t serving her anymore. Together, we dive into the intersection of sobriety, menopause, and midlife health—and the empowering freedom that comes when women take the reins on their wellbeing.

In this conversation, we explore:

• Michelle’s honest story of how her relationship with alcohol shifted during the pandemic.
• Why midlife is often the breaking point where women realize alcohol is not their friend.
• The science behind how alcohol impacts hormones, sleep, mood, and weight gain in perimenopause and menopause.
• The myth of moderation and why it doesn’t work for everyone.
• The often-ignored role of sleep, hydration, protein, and strength training in women’s midlife health.
• How conversations around alcohol and menopause are finally becoming less taboo—and why that matters.

Michelle’s work is all about helping women stop settling and start showing up for themselves. This episode is packed with real talk, science, and encouragement for anyone navigating sobriety and the massive physical changes of midlife.

Connect with Michelle:

Instagram: @askingforafriend_pod

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

Why do we procrastinate so much in recovery?

In this episode, I unpack the six key reasons why procrastination shows up during sobriety and how we can gently work through it:

1) Low Dopamine Tolerance

Our brains are used to quick dopamine hits from alcohol. Without that, even basic tasks feel boring and unrewarding. I share ways to build motivation through small wins and habit stacking.

2) Nervous System Dysregulation

Sobriety means feeling everything again. Overwhelm can trigger a freeze response, making even simple tasks feel impossible. I talk about how to regulate your body and borrow safety from others.

3) Learned Helplessness

After repeated failures, we start believing we can’t succeed. I dive into how this mindset forms and how to break the cycle with messy action and micro wins.

4) Fear of Failure

Trying and failing feels unbearable, so we avoid trying at all. I share how to reframe failure as data and growth, not proof that we’re broken.

5) Fear of Success

Success means change, and change can feel threatening. I explore how fear of growth can lead to self-sabotage and how to embrace expansion safely.

6) Inner Critic Paralysis

That voice in your head telling you you’re not good enough? It’s trying to protect you—but it’s keeping you stuck. I offer ways to quiet the critic and take imperfect action.

Access the AB Process Course

You can find Kate on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/rewiredsober/

Work with Kate: https://linktr.ee/KateVitela

Email Podcast: [email protected] 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this episode, I sit down with Andrea Kaplan, founder of Rewriting Sober, midlife mom of two, writer, and walking proof that it’s never “too late” to rewrite your story. At 48, Andrea hit one year sober, not from a dramatic rock bottom—but from the quiet, heavy hell of anxiety, shame, and soul-numbing routine.

We unpack the real transformation: moving from people-pleasing and control to clarity and confidence. Andrea shares how she survived early sobriety while parenting teens, traveling to Italy, going to Vegas (yeah, Vegas), and hosting milestone family events—all without pouring a drink.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why you don’t need a rock bottom to choose sobriety
• How people pleasing and control masked her internal chaos
• Letting go of the fantasy of “drinking like a normal person”
• The mental torture of moderation attempts
• Rewiring her relationship with fear, self-trust, and perfectionism
• What Italy, Vegas, and gelato taught her about sober joy
• The subtle but life-altering moment when she finally felt hope again

Andrea proves you can look like you’ve got it all together and still feel lost—and that healing is possible without hitting the floor. This one’s for the high-functioning women who are done trying to function their way through despair.

Connect with Andrea: https://www.instagram.com/rewritingsober/

Links: 

Access the AB Process Course

You can find Kate on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/rewiredsober/

Explore Kate’s blog: https://thesobercurator.com/category/sober-lifestyle/youve-been-selected/

Work with Kate: https://linktr.ee/KateVitela

Email Podcast: [email protected] 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

Ever wonder why you want alcohol so badly—only to feel like absolute garbage afterward? You’re not broken. Your brain is just doing its job. In this episode, I want to share more about the neuroscience of addiction, diving deep into the opponent process theory, neurotransmitter chaos, and the real reason that 5 p.m. craving feels like a freight train.

In this episode I cover:

• The brain’s “AB Process” and how it wires us to crave booze and crash after
• Why the wine witch hour isn’t about willpower—it’s about biology
• GABA, glutamate, dopamine & cortisol: what’s really going on in your brain
• How tolerance and withdrawal escalate over time (and why)
• Why early sobriety feels like a hormonal rollercoaster—and how long it really lasts
• Why understanding brain science is the ultimate tool to ditch shame and build lasting sobriety

I share the moment when everything clicked (in a Safeway parking lot, of all places), and how learning the science behind addiction finally made me feel empowered—not broken.

Links: 

Access the AB Process Course

You can find Kate on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/rewiredsober/

Explore Kate’s blog: https://thesobercurator.com/category/sober-lifestyle/youve-been-selected/

Work with Kate: https://linktr.ee/KateVitela

Email Podcast: [email protected] 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

Ever wonder why telling your story in recovery feels so powerful? It’s not just emotional—it's biological. In this solo episode, I talk about how storytelling activates empathy, builds emotional safety, and rewires your brain for change.

From mirror neurons to narrative psychology, learn why your messy truth is the medicine—and how sharing it might be the most powerful recovery tool you have.

Today I cover:

• Why “stories go where science can’t” (but neuroscience is catching up!)
• The magic and messiness of early AA storytelling circles
• How mirror neurons and narrative psychology help us change
• The link between relational safety, vulnerability, and brain rewiring
• Why your recovery story evolves—and why that matters
• How storytelling softens self-judgment and builds compassion
• The science behind why hearing one powerful story can change everything
• Why women especially thrive through shared emotional narratives

Resources Mentioned:

• Burnout by Emily & Amelia Nagoski
• We Are the Luckiest by Laura McKowen
• Research by Dan McAdams

Links: 

You can find Kate on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/katevitela/

Explore Kate’s blog: https://thesobercurator.com/category/sober-lifestyle/youve-been-selected/

Work with Kate: https://linktr.ee/KateVitela

Email Podcast: [email protected] 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this episode of Rewired Sober, I sit down with Leah Fulton Eng, a nurse, and the heart behind the Sober Mom Collective. Leah shares the truth about what it really looks like to get sober while parenting—and why community may be the most important part of recovery.

Together, we unpack how the illusion of “mommy wine culture” keeps so many women stuck, and how the simple act of showing up—being seen—can be the first step toward lasting change.

In this episode we talk about:

• Leah’s story of addiction, denial, and finally surrendering to recovery
• Why she didn’t think traditional 12-step recovery was for her
• The surprising power of a phone call from another sober mom
• What it's like to recover in the middle of motherhood
• The deep shame around secrecy, lying, and trying to do it all alone
• How visibility in community changed everything for her
• Why it took 4 months to tell her husband the truth—and how he responded
• The inspiration behind creating the Sober Mom Collective

Leah is the founder and CEO of the Sober Mom Collective, a certified holistic coach specializing in recovery, a postpartum doula, and a registered nurse. She is in recovery from alcohol use, cannabis use, depression, and anxiety, and is passionate about creating safe, inclusive spaces for moms navigating both sobriety and parenting.

Links + Resources:

• Learn more about The Sober Mom Collective
• Connect with Leah on Instagram: @sobermomcollective

Connect with Kate: https://www.instagram.com/rewiredsober/

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this episode, I take you on a raw and unfiltered ride through New York City—from gritty Canal Street lofts to unexpected moments of insecurity on the Upper East Side. I recorded this on the fly during a spring trip, reflecting on identity, recovery, and the unexpected ways old wounds still show up—seven years sober. What begins as a rant about bad hotel decor becomes a powerful story of self-awareness, self-talk, and rediscovering joy (and a little magic) on the sidewalks of Manhattan.

Key Takeaways:

• Even years into sobriety, old insecurities can resurface—and that’s normal.
• Comparison is sneaky and shows up when you least expect it.
• Sobriety isn’t just about not drinking—it’s about learning who you are and what still needs healing.
• You don’t have to have it all together to have a good time or be proud of your progress.
• A gritty hotel and a fashion icon can remind you how far you’ve come.

Connect with Kate on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rewiredsober/

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In today's episode I am speaking with a former coaching client and dementia specialist Tammy Pozerycki. With 551 days of sobriety under her belt, Tammy opens up about her long history of addiction—from food and smoking to alcohol—and the emotional roots that kept her stuck for years. She shares how body image issues, disordered eating, and generational trauma shaped her coping mechanisms.

Tammy reflects on the internal pain that motivated her to change, the chronic health conditions that reinforced her decision, and the role of coaching in helping her face the truth, shed the victim mindset, and commit to growth. Her honest and relatable story is a reminder that recovery isn’t linear, but it is absolutely possible—even later in life.

Key Takeaways:

• Addiction doesn’t discriminate—being in healthcare doesn’t automatically mean you understand recovery.
• Tammy’s addiction shifted forms throughout her life: from food to smoking to alcohol, always as a way to escape emotional pain.
• Emotional wounds from childhood, including body shaming and generational trauma, can fuel disordered coping habits.
• Long-term sobriety required Tammy to build accountability, especially through women's recovery groups and coaching.
• Her turning point came from emotional exhaustion and a heartbreaking comment from her husband—not a public fallout or external crisis.
• Chronic health issues like pancreatitis and liver damage later reinforced the need to stay sober, but she had already made the internal shift before diagnoses.
• Coaching, especially with someone who has lived experience, helped her unpack denial, build healthier narratives, and stop seeing herself as a victim.
• Reclaiming her life included confronting past stories, healing family wounds, and learning to finally put herself first.
• Sobriety isn’t just about not drinking—it's a commitment to becoming your authentic self, even if that means rediscovering who you are in your 50s.

Connect with Tammy:

https://www.facebook.com/tammy.pozerycki

Work with Kate: https://linktr.ee/KateVitela

Email Podcast: [email protected] 

The Gut Check: A Private Course for Self-Inquiry

Register here to gain immediate access to Gut Check—your space for clarity, relief, and next steps.

https://kate-vitela.mykajabi.com/offers/2et4yoCH

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

Welcome to the first official episode of Rewired Sober — formerly You’ve Been Selected.

In this episode I pull back the curtain on the real reasons for the name change, what I've learned about ego, identity, and Instagram, and how getting lost in vanity metrics nearly derailed the heart of my mission — to help women recover through neuroscience, storytelling, and soul-deep honesty.

If you’re craving a sober space that’s about rewiring your brain — not reposting filtered versions of your rock bottom — you’re in the right place.

Why the Name Change Matters

• The origin story of You’ve Been Selected and why it will always matter
• The shift toward a more grounded, neuroscience-rooted message with Rewired Sober
• Creating a safe space for women in recovery, not a public catwalk
• “Making soup”: building personalized sobriety recipes based on who you are, not what works for someone else
• Honouring neurodiversity, upbringing, trauma, and identity in recovery work

Why Rewiring Is the Work

• Addiction as a well-worn neural groove — and how we form new pathways
• Recovery through verbal processing, compassion, and community
• The role of laughter, creativity, and storytelling in healing the brain
• Why neuroscience and spirituality don’t have to be at odds

Links: 

You can find Kate on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/katevitela/

Explore Kate’s blog: https://thesobercurator.com/category/sober-lifestyle/youve-been-selected/

Work with Kate: https://linktr.ee/KateVitela

Email Podcast: [email protected] 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In today's episode, I sit down with Beate Pilgreen — a professional organizer, sober powerhouse, and all-around life declutterer — to talk about the connection between getting sober and clearing the damn clutter — both emotionally and physically.

Beate shares her journey from growing up in Germany to making a "geographic" move to the U.S., thinking a new zip code could fix her heartbreak (and her drinking). Spoiler: it didn’t. But the story didn’t end there. After years of struggle, a 20-year marriage, and a full life reset, Beate found her way into sobriety — and, unexpectedly, into a whole new career helping other women find freedom through simplicity.

In this episode, we cover:

• How Beate discovered professional organizing after getting sober (and realized it was more emotional work than she expected).
• The link between addiction, clutter, and self-worth — and why sober women often feel stuck in their homes post-recovery.
• Reclaiming your space as a sober woman and redefining comfort and safety.
• Living intentionally, consuming consciously, and learning to say “no thanks” to a bag of random hand-me-downs.
• Beate’s transition from in-home organizing to digital offers and coaching — and her dream of building an army of sober, clutter-free women.

Whether you’re clearing out your closet or cleaning up your past, this episode is a heartfelt, hilarious, and grounding reminder that letting go — of stuff, of stories, of self-doubt — is powerful as hell.

Follow her journey on Instagram @noworganizing

Links: 

You can find Kate on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/katevitela/

Explore Kate’s blog: https://thesobercurator.com/category/sober-lifestyle/youve-been-selected/

Work with Kate: https://linktr.ee/KateVitela

Email Podcast: [email protected] 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course