What is it like to love someone through active addiction? In this raw and deeply personal episode, I sit down with my husband, Philip—a combat veteran and mental health advocate—to talk about our journey through addiction, codependency, and survival. 

What we cover:

• Our honest, unfiltered truth about love, recovery, and the hidden battles that we both faced throughout the years
• Phillip openly shares how he felt during my rock-bottom moments
• Philip shares his own struggles, the myths he believed about addiction, and the hard-earned lessons he learned
• Where we are today and how through our experiences we can show up to help others who are navigating a similar path

Connect With Kate

https://www.instagram.com/katevitela/

https://www.katevitela.com 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

Dr. Robb Kelly is a quick-witted, no-nonsense addiction expert who doesn’t sugarcoat the truth. He takes recovery seriously because people are dying, and there’s no time for excuses. In this episode, we go deep into his journey, his methods, and why he believes full recovery is possible.

What We Cover:

• Dr. Kelly’s personal struggle – Losing custody of his children to addiction and fighting his way back.
• Building a recovery empire – How he turned his pain into a powerful business that changes lives.
• The science of rewiring the brain – Addiction isn’t a life sentence if you do the work.
• Childhood trauma: The real gateway drug – Why past wounds fuel addiction and how to heal them.
• Breaking the “I’m not enough” myth – The limiting belief that keeps people stuck, and how Dr. Kelly shatters it in his unconventional way.
• Uncover, Discover, Discard – His powerful words for letting go of the past and building a new future.
• The importance of willingness – No one can want recovery for you. You have to step up.

This episode is raw, real, and in-your-face. If you’re looking for sugarcoating, this isn’t it. But if you want the hard truth about what it takes to recover and stay recovered? Press play.

Resources:

📖 Dr. Robb Kelly’s book:  Daddy, Daddy, Please Stop Drinking

https://a.co/d/d1nyj32  

🔗 Connect with Dr. Robb Kelly 

www.robbkelly.com

https://linktr.ee/drrobbkelly?utm_source=linktree_profile_share<sid=a3a9a3a4-ee1d-463c-850d-a9c3ad956280

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

Every year, I take a trip to New York City for my soberversary, and this year marks 7 years. NYC has always been a magical place, but in sobriety, it’s taken on an even deeper meaning—it’s shown me that I can accomplish bucket list dreams sober instead of just being a drunken dreamer who never follows through.

What I Share in This Episode:

• The power of experiencing NYC sober – How this city has become proof that I can do anything without alcohol.
• Break Free Fashion Show – How being part of this mental health and recovery movement made NYC even more special.
• Why you can truly do ANYTHING sober – Alcohol made me dream big but never take action. Sobriety made the impossible, possible.
• Things I’m proud of myself for – Reflecting on 7 years of growth, risks, and wins.
• Getting tattoos & being myself unapologetically – Why I no longer fear embracing who I really am.
• Meeting my fashion icon, Pat Fields – A full-circle moment that reminded me to embrace life and go with the flow

This solo episode is personal, raw, and a reminder that sobriety doesn’t limit you—it unlocks everything you thought was out of reach.

Resources & Ways to Connect:

🖤 Support Break Free (New York Fashion Week)  & their mission: 

https://www.breakfreenyfw.com/ 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this solo episode, Kate gets real about her complicated relationship with gratitude. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t always her favorite concept. She dives into why the typical “gratitude fixes everything” mantras used to make her roll her eyes and how she found a way to embrace gratitude without spiritually bypassing the real pain that life throws at us.

Kate unpacks how gratitude, when done authentically, is less about ignoring pain and more about reframing it as an act of rebellion against a world that constantly tells us we’re not enough, don’t have enough, or need more.

Key topics in this episode:

• Why Gratitude Annoyed Her: A candid look at Kate’s resistance to cheesy gratitude sayings and toxic positivity.
• Reframing Gratitude as Rebellion: How gratitude can be a bold, intentional stand against a culture of scarcity and dissatisfaction.
• Happiness Feedback Loops and Neuroplasticity: The science behind how practicing gratitude rewires the brain, creating new patterns of happiness and contentment.
• Embodying the Infinite Game: Kate shares why she got a tattoo that says “Embody the Infinite Game” and how it reminds her to play for growth, connection, and meaning rather than winning or achieving in life.

This episode is full of humor, honesty, and practical insights, as Kate explores how gratitude isn’t about pretending everything’s fine—it’s about embracing the messy, painful, and beautiful reality of life with open arms.

Why Listen?

If you’ve ever felt like gratitude is just another thing you “should” do, this episode will change your perspective. Kate’s take is raw, relatable, and grounded in both personal experience and brain science.

Join Kate as she flips the script on gratitude and shows how it can be a rebellious, transformative tool for healing and growth. Tune in for laughs, insights, and a refreshing dose of realness.

Connect with Kate 

Work with Kate: https://linktr.ee/KateVitela

https://www.instagram.com/katevitela/

https://www.katevitela.com 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this episode, I speak with Kate Vitela, a board-certified nurse coach and certified addiction RN with over two decades of nursing experience. Kate has been sober since 2018. She has empowered women in recovery with humour, science, and spiritual growth. Her podcast, "You Been Selected," inspires transformation through real talk and actionable tools for sobriety and personal development. 

Throughout our conversation, we explored the misconceptions surrounding addiction, particularly the stigma that often accompanies it. Kate emphasized the importance of understanding addiction as a complex issue rooted in pain and trauma rather than a moral failing. She highlighted the need for compassion and support for those struggling with addiction and how her coaching practice aims to provide a safe space for individuals to explore their relationship with alcohol.

Connect with Marsha:

Marsha Vanwynsberghe — NLP Storytelling Trainer, OUTSPOKEN NLP Coaching Certification, Author, Speaker, and Podcaster

Download FREE “You Are Supported” Hypnosis and Subliminal Bundle HERE 

Join the next cohort of OUTSPOKEN NLP Coaching Certification (kick-off in March 2025) HERE

Learn more about changing the Stories We Tell Ourselves Digital Program HERE. Use Code PODCAST to receive 20% off. Code FASTACTION20

Tap the “Follow” button never to miss a show, and if you love the show, please feel free to tag me on social media, share it with a friend, or leave me a rating and review. This helps the show grow!

Website: www.marshavanw.com

Connect on IG. Click HERE

Subscribe on YouTube. Click HERE

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this episode, Kate continues her heartfelt conversation with Nurse Coach Sarah Morgando as they take a deeper dive into the story of Sarah’s sister, Jenny. They explore the complex relationship between gastric bypass surgery and addiction—a journey that ultimately led to Jenny’s untimely death.

Together, Kate and Sarah discuss the profound impact this experience had on Sarah’s mission to create a space where women feel seen, heard, and safe. This inspired her to form a women’s group centered on sisterhood, self-awareness, and emotional safety—a place where vulnerability can flourish and healing begins.

Key topics covered in this episode:

• Jenny’s Story: The connection between gastric bypass, addiction, and its often-overlooked risks.
• The Power of Sisterhood: Why creating spaces of safety and mutual understanding for women is essential.
• The Unsung Hero in Group Spaces: Exploring the power of the witness—how listening and holding space can be as healing as sharing.
• Feeling Seen and Heard: How group connections allow women to process pain, shed shame, and find hope—sometimes saving lives in the process.

This episode is a reminder of the profound impact of community and the ripple effect of creating spaces where women can authentically connect. Whether you’re in recovery or seeking deeper connection, this conversation will inspire you to reflect on the importance of being both seen and a witness to others.

Connect with Sarah Morgando

https://www.thejourneytc.com/

https://www.instagram.com/sarahmorgando/

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this episode of "You Been Selected," Kate honors the incredible work of Nurse Coach Sarah Morgando and her group Sisterhood Rising, formed in loving memory of Sarah’s sister, who lost her battle with addiction. This powerful group is rooted in the concept of healing the sister wound—the deep societal patterns of judgment, comparison, and competition that often divide women.

Kate explores how Sisterhood Rising creates a space where women in recovery can come together to dismantle these wounds and foster authentic connection. This concept is especially vital in female sober circles, where fears of judgment about parenting, body image, or womanhood often prevent vulnerability and connection.

Topics Covered in This Episode:

• The story behind Sisterhood Rising and its mission to honor Sarah’s sister.
• What the “sister wound” is and how it shows up in recovery and daily life.
• How judgment and comparison can isolate women, even in sober communities.
• Why healing these wounds is essential for building trust, connection, and emotional resilience.
• Practical ways women can support each other instead of competing or comparing.

Kate reflects on the courage it takes to break cycles of judgment and comparison and how groups like Sisterhood Rising create transformative spaces where women can truly rise together.

Tune in for an honest conversation about breaking barriers, building community, and fostering sisterhood in sobriety.

Follow and subscribe for more episodes on recovery, connection, and living a purpose-driven life.

Connect with Sarah Morgando

https://www.thejourneytc.com/

https://www.instagram.com/sarahmorgando/

Follow and subscribe for more honest conversations about life, recovery, and growth!

Links

You can find Kate on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/katevitela/

Explore Kate’s blog: https://thesobercurator.com/category/sober-lifestyle/youve-been-selected/

Work with Kate: https://linktr.ee/KateVitela

Email Podcast: [email protected] 

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this entertaining episode, Kate sits down with Alysse Bryson, founder of the online magazine The Sober Curator, to talk about how it all began. Alysse shares the story behind creating this much-needed space—a BuzzFeed-style hub for sober people—and how Kate got involved writing a fashion column, despite having no clue what she was doing at first.

From humble beginnings to walking the runway at NYFW, Kate and Alysse recount their adventures in NYC, their shared passion for sober creativity, and their plans to bring even more entertaining content to The Sober Curator.

Tune in for:

• The origin story of The Sober Curator.
• Kate’s unexpected journey from fashion blogging to NYFW.
• Funny stories from their escapades in NYC.
• Why the sober world needs fun, relatable media like The Sober Curator.

Get ready for laughs, inspiration, and a sneak peek at what’s next in the world of sober creativity.

Follow and subscribe for more stories, laughs, and recovery inspiration!

Connect with Alysse Bryson or The Sober Curator: 

https://www.instagram.com/alysseinthecity/

https://thesobercurator.com/

“The Shift” Group Coaching with Jessica Landon & Kate Vitela 

https://kate-vitela.mykajabi.com/222

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this enlightening episode, Kate welcomes the renowned Veronica Valli—esteemed author, podcast host, and addiction expert with decades of sobriety. Veronica shares her seasoned perspective on the ever-evolving sober landscape on social media, diving into the rise of sober influencers, the cult of online personalities, and the importance of critical thinking in recovery.

Key highlights from the episode include:

• The Sober Social Media Boom: Veronica explores the positive and negative impacts of social media on the recovery community, including how it fosters connection but can also spread misinformation.
• Sober Influencers and the “Guru” Effect: Why it’s crucial for people in recovery to recognize the difference between genuine inspiration and self-appointed experts.
• Doing Your Research: Veronica stresses the importance of evaluating credentials, understanding the source of advice, and avoiding blind allegiance to influencers.
• Personal Accountability in Recovery: How to take ownership of your journey while using social media and other platforms as tools—not substitutes—for deeper work.
• The Evolving Recovery Space: Veronica’s insights on how recovery is shifting in the digital age and what the community can do to uphold integrity and authenticity.

Veronica’s wisdom and candid approach make this a must-listen for anyone navigating recovery in the social media era. She offers practical advice for cutting through the noise and staying grounded in your personal path to sobriety.

Connect with Veronica Valli:

 https://www.instagram.com/veronicajvalli/

“The Shift” Group Coaching with Jessica Landon & Kate Vitela 

https://kate-vitela.mykajabi.com/222

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course

In this episode of "You Been Selected," Kate breaks down the often misunderstood experience of Post-Acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS) and how it can impact your sobriety journey. Many people think the hardest part of recovery is the initial detox—but PAWS, which can last much longer than expected, presents its own set of challenges.

Kate explains how PAWS symptoms like mood swings, self-doubt, and emotional instability can leave you feeling frustrated and discouraged, especially if you’re navigating recovery without a supportive community. She also shares why understanding this phase of recovery is crucial for building resilience and staying on track.

Topics Covered in This Episode:

• What is PAWS, and why does it linger for months (or even years) after getting sober?
• The emotional rollercoaster: Why mood swings, irritability, and self-doubt are so common.
• How PAWS can sneak up on you and impact your motivation.
• The importance of seeking sober support through community, meetings, or coaching.
• Practical tools to stay grounded and hopeful during the PAWS phase.

Kate offers relatable insights and actionable advice to help you navigate this challenging part of recovery. With the right tools and support, PAWS doesn’t have to derail your progress—it can become an opportunity for growth and deeper healing.

Tune in to learn how to stay the course and build a strong foundation for lasting sobriety.

Follow and subscribe for more episodes on recovery, emotional resilience, and living the infinite game of life.

Connect w/Kate:

https://www.instagram.com/katevitela/

https://www.katevitela.com 

“The Shift” Group Coaching with Jessica Landon & Kate Vitela 

https://kate-vitela.mykajabi.com/222

Mentioned in this episode:

Gut Check: A Private Self-Inquiry Course