Ross O'Carroll-Kelly

By The Irish Times

The weekly Ross o'Carroll-Kelly column in audio, read by Paul Howard.

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· Comedy

4.8

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FAQs about Ross O'Carroll-Kelly:

How many episodes does Ross O'Carroll-Kelly have?

The podcast currently has 596 episodes available.

Ross O'Carroll-Kelly episodes:

June 05, 2026 We filled a skip with all the things Sorcha decided she can live without, until she changed her mind
So the latest “thing” in our house is the Swedish death clean. For those of you who aren’t married to Sorcha Lalor, this is a decluttering method that’s meant to spare your loved ones the trouble of sorting through your shit after you’ve dropped the mic.
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7min
May 29, 2026 ‘Nobody can say I haven’t put my body on the line for this Leinster team’
The old man says he thinks he might not live long enough to see Leinster win the European Cup again. I tell him I’m only 46 years old and I’m storting to feel the same way.
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7min
May 22, 2026 ‘Ross, it’s a very simple choice. It’s me or it’s Leinster. You decide’
Sorcha says she’s – oh my God – so excited about Saturday and I tell her I am too. She goes, “These are the moments, aren’t they?” Which is random because she’s hasn’t shown the slightest flicker of interest in rugby since she thought Rob Kearney gave her a smile and a wave at Taste of Dublin the year before the pandemic and I didn’t have the hort to tell her that he was smiling and waving at me.
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6min
May 15, 2026 ‘Ross, I think you’re finally getting your comeuppance from the universe’
So what do you think? Yeah, no, Nicola – as in, like, Honor’s girlfriend – is showing me a watch that she bought from, like, Tiffany of all places? It must be, like, a grand’s worth.
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7min
May 08, 2026 ‘Dude, you’re not in Ballsbridge now,’ I tell the old man. ‘This is Las f**king Braygas!’
The old man asks me if I’ve been boning up on my Spanish ahead of the trip to Bilbao. I’m like, “Is that where Bilbao is? In Spain?” I honestly think I learned more from rugby than I ever did at school.
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7min
May 01, 2026 I have zero interest in her in that way – is it weird that I want to spend time with this girl?
So I’m in the gym and I’m bench-pressing, I don’t know, something ridiculous, when all of a sudden there’s someone standing over me and – yeah, no – they’re, like, talking to me? I take out the old AirPods and sit up and it ends up being Nicola, as in, like, Honor’s new – in fairness – girlfriend.
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7min
April 24, 2026 ‘There’s nothing wrong with Bray, Ross,’ the old man says. Literally. Word for word
The old man is sitting in the corner of what was once Shanahan’s on the Green, sucking on a Cohiba the size of a Daihatsu exhaust.
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7min
April 17, 2026 ‘Sorcha, I don’t need ChatGPT to tell me how to talk to my daughter and the girl she’s seeing’
Sorcha asks me how I’m feeling and I tell her I’m in scintillating form – especially after the win over Sale yesterday. I’m half-thinking of doing my joke about having a semi to look forward to – but then I think better of it.
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7min
April 10, 2026 ‘Potatoes au gratin? My old dear used to say they’re for people with money but no class’
“Come in,” she goes.

This is Bernie I’m quoting – word for word, by the way – as in, like, Bernie the mother of Claire from, like, Bray of all places?
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8min
April 03, 2026 We’re driving through Donnybrook and Sorcha shouts ‘Stop!’
“Stop!” Sorcha goes. Yeah, no, we’re driving through Donnybrook at the time. I generally slow down anyway as we’re passing the spot where Kielys once stood, just to make the sign of the cross on myself. Except Sorcha is looking past me at the other side of the road?
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6min

FAQs about Ross O'Carroll-Kelly:

How many episodes does Ross O'Carroll-Kelly have?

The podcast currently has 596 episodes available.