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Ali was from London but now lives in Maryland

We talk about how she got into the business of dog training, which has a little something to do with her German Shepherd cross Indie.

We talk about the widespread misunderstanding that all dogs should love all dogs and I may or may not tell an anecdote of me hugging a stranger to try and show them that they wouldn’t appreciate being crowded either. Spoiler alert: it didn’t work.

Ali also explains something that I think is amazing:

She tells new clients to first take a break from everything (like training) for a week or so, so they can reconnect with all the reasons why they love their dog in the first place.

Another tough nut to crack for most of us is that of questioning authority. Ali had fewer difficulties there as asking “Why?” comes naturally to her. My hope is that by listening to Ali talk, more people will feel free to do the same. 

Ali’s training philosophy is that she wants to provide people with the skills that allow them to be able to tackle possible future setbacks, since it serves us well to take into account that your anxious dog will probably keep showing some anxiety from time to time, despite all the training effort you put in.

Speaking of training and being a trainer, working 80 hours a week is no exception in the dog world and at first it wasn’t for Ali either.

We talk about all things dog professional:

The emotional burden of being a dog trainer, the taking on the setback and emotions of your clients, not earning enough to make a living, and giving away a part of you every time so that there’s less and less of you to go around.

So, how did she manage to find that elusive work-life balance?

Upon moving to the USA she completely restructured her business and she explains what that looks like.

Her advice to aspiring dog trainers: Don’t try to be everything to all people.

And finally, there’s Ali’s summary of her thoughts on expectation, frustration and celebration. It’s so on point, that I would be remiss if I didn’t write it down here:

Manage expectation, minimize frustration, maximize celebration

Links:

Ali’s website: https://rebarkable.com/

Find Ali on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/re.barkable/

Ali’s podcast “Ask Ali” on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/nl/podcast/ask-ali-a-professional-dog-trainer-answers-your-dog/id1586671078

and on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/49evBFpTbFUdOakjRA6FTV?si=21ad9666aa1d4e27

Email her: woof @ rebarkable.com

EPIDOSE WEBSITE:

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/

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Do you ever have a hard time relaxing after something stressful happens?

You want to be in control of your emotions so your bad mood doesn't rub off on your dog or others around you.

If you're angry at something, you want to calm down so you don't accidentally start a fight by lashing out at another person or so that you don't end up being unnecessarily harsh with your dog.

My guess is that one of your strategies is to focus on regaining calmness as quickly as possible, by doing some version of a relaxation exercise.

That's skipping an important step though, one that might allow you to forsake the relaxation exercises altogether.

It's one of the things that have had the biggest impact on my quality of life and I am sharing it with you in this episode.

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/mindset-episode-019-the-best-way-to-relax-is-not-what-you-think/

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/

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Jumy is a positive reinforcement horse trainer from  the U.A.E.  who opened her own livery yard, malath paddock paradise, 3 years ago, but she’s been in the industry for 13 years already.

I ask lots of no doubt cringe worthy questions, as I know nothing about horses, and we touch upon a ton of things.

Of course I want to know how Jumy ended up in the force free training world.

Unlike many dog guardians it wasn’t because she had exhausted punitive methods or because her horse had behavioral problems. 

Rather it was trick training that sparked the idea of using positive reinforcement training to train all kinds of behavior. If you can use it to teach a horse tricks, why couldn’t you use it to teach other behaviors after all?

Being a trailblazer had both upsides and downsides.

The biggest positive was that she never fell into any kind of trap of wanting to be able to do it all and know it all at once. She simply had to follow a try-as-you-go path of discovery.

When her clients find her though, it usually is because they are experiencing problems with their horses.  So we discuss Jumy’s approach to dealing with horse guardians who may be using tools on their horses that she doesn’t necessarily agree with. 

Her assumption is that the guardian loves their horse. She never wants to shame them or make the feel guilty about their choice of tool. Rather she lets them draw their own conclusions.

 So what about the differences?  With the horse being a prey animal and the dog being a predator, Jumy explains how that affects the required rate of reinforcement.

 Then there is natural horsemanship. Jumy explains her views on that and how horses who are trained with that method can mentally shut down.

Naturally, I ask about her dogs who live at the stables and are allowed to free roam. Funnily enough, they chill most of the time, unless they are breaking up horse fights or they decide to come along on a hack with the horses, that is.

Finally, Jumy explains her criteria for canceling a session with a horse when she isn’t in the right mindset herself, and what the alternatives are, such as adapting the type of the session to her energy levels.

Links:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/028-jumy-on-no-longer-wanting-to-be-the-only-r-plus-horse-trainer-in-the-u-a-e/

Jumy on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jumys.horses/

Jumy’s livery yard: https://www.malathpaddockparadise.com/

Tango, the miniature horse: https://www.instagram.com/tangotheminiature/

Tango stacking rings: https://www.instagram.com/p/BY0VktphmWH/

The dogs who inhabit Mallath Paddock Paradise:

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/

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This podcast episode is a reply to an email I received from someone on my email-list.

They wrote:
I was constantly trying to manage between work, my dogs, my almost adult kids, my house, a big yard with a lot of plants, my husband, my extended family, and some time for myself!

Sound familiar?

You're juggling all the things, but no matter the effort, it seems like something or someone is always suffering, because you never manage to get it quite right.
 Guilt is inevitable. Spend time on one thing and the other thing suffers.

1) Is that even true though? That someone is always suffering?
2)  And are you even spending your energy where you want to spend it? Are you living in line with your priorities?

These are the two main topics I  discuss in this podcast episode.

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/

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Grab your dog and plan a dog walk or two.  Better yet, sit down, grab pen and paper and take notes. This episode is long and chock-full of wisdom. 

Here are just some of the things Haley of @paws.andreflect talk about:

• Why  we choose to train the behaviors we train
• Choice points: recognizing what you’re feeling and choosing to do something about it in a healthy and productive way rather than letting your feelings ruin your day.

(What Haley describes are actually techniques you will learn in coaching with me as well).

• Choosing the metrics you use to measure success: the recovery time after a reaction rather than if your dog reacts
• Knowing who to trust as a trainer with all the contradictory advice out there
• When is good good enough?
• The law of diminishing marginal returns
• What giving your dog freedom means

But also:

• Positive punishment and how to have respectful conversations with people who have different views and opinions
• Taking the leap to become a full-time self-employed writer about all things dog
• Imposter syndrome and the nagging question of “Am I  good enough?”
• Embarking on van life and the thought process behind it

Find Haley, her husband Sean, their van Hermes and their blue heeler Scout here:

https://pawsandreflect.blog/

https://www.instagram.com/paws.andreflect/

https://podcasts.apple.com/nl/podcast/paws-and-reflect/id1645967746

https://open.spotify.com/show/1Eu3BJt11SLdDeALOd6RVq?si=07654b34d5fd4832

Episode website:
https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/027-haley-scout-and-sean-on-finding-out-where-you-and-your-dog-fit-in-the-dogworld/

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/

Send us a text

Would you categorize stress as a negative emotion? Are you willing to feel it? 

What do you do when something stressful happens on a walk? 
The answer to that question might already give you the answer to the first two questions.

Do you compound your stress with anger at the dog guardian of the out-of-control dog accosting yours? Or do you blame yourself for having gotten yourself and/or your dog in that situation?

How could you handle things differently? One of the answers is to look at stress as a neutral thing. To not immediately place stress on the "bad" side of the "emotions divide".

Will that cause you to think of stress lightly? And make you inadvertently end up in more stressful situations? 
I don't believe so and in this episode, I explain why.

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/bonus-episode-017-stress-how-to-feel-it-and-think-about-it-differently/

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/

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UK veterinarian Grace and I talk about her Romanian Rescue dog Piper and how being the guardian of a challenging dog has impacted her work as a veterinarian.
What were the advantages she had, being a vet already, in dealing with her dog?

We also talk about all the terms and certifications being thrown around that relate to animal behavior and training. Are there vet behaviorists in the UK? Who can call themselves that?

Did you know you can do a master's level studies in animal behavior in the UK?

But also, did you know many veterinarians have not been taught about dog body language in vet school?

How does she start the conversation about behavior with dog guardians who may be oblivious to the plight of their dog?

And what about ruling out pain? Turns out that you as the guardian are the person in the best position to notice if chronic pain is an issue.

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/

Send us a text

Are you going after the wrong goal?

Is your goal to be able to trust your dog?

Is your goal to not want to be afraid of something bad happening to your dog or because of your dog?

Is your goal to be able to have relaxed non-training dog walks?

Or is it to be able to be calm under all circumstances?

You might be chasing after the wrong thing.

You wouldn't tell someone who's been in a car accident that the goal is for them to get to believing that driving is perfectly safe again. You would rather help them get in the car again despite being afraid. You would help them to accept that being afraid is part of the process.

Start with acceptance of where you are at.

Denying reality is only setting you up for more stress.

Continuously wanting your dog walks to be relaxed when they're not, is fighting reality.

It's saying: it shouldn't be like this. That is cause enough for frustration.

-----------
Link to get onto my email list and to get hold of my free PDF with 6 mindset shifts:
https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/tyblp001/

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/

Send us a text

After she had gotten several shoutouts on the podcast already, it was about time I interview the one and only Marissa Martino of Paws and Reward herself. Or rather, I got lucky enough to have her on the show.

If I were you, I would listen to this show twice. There are so many gems in there.

Listen to it once, just to absorb what Marissa is saying, and then listen again and ask yourself how what she says applies to you and your situation. It will be time well spent.

Marissa describes how unlike many others on this podcast her road to dog training did not start with a challenging dog. Her dog training journey started before she ever had a dog.

She now focuses heavily on the human end of the leash, and mindset in particular (can you guess why I wanted to talk to her?). The spark that lit that particular fire was provided by a therapist who managed to point out how strategies Marissa already used with her dog training clients could also apply in her own life.

Once Pandora’s box of parallels had been opened Marissa couldn’t unsee these parallels between the connections with our dog and the connections we have with others and ourselves anymore. The rest as they say is history.

We talk about the power of turning questions around. If I believe my client/dog is not listening to me, how is it true that I am not listening to them?

About how knowledge is both power and very confronting and often uncomfortable. We talk about how that discomfort often leads us to play the blame game and the power of embracing discomfort.

As I keep hearing conflicting opinions on whether LIMA (Least Intrusive Minimally Aversive) as a training philosophy is “good” or “bad”, because the humane hierarchy it is based on mentions positive punishment, I ask Marissa about that too.

Fittingly enough, Marissa is also the first person on the show to describe which feeling the words expectation, frustration and celebration trigger for her.

Of course, showing up throughout the story is Sully, who was a senior dog when he recently passed away.

Links:

Marissa’s website: https://pawsandreward.com/

Marissa on Instagram: @pawsandreward

Marissa’s book, Human-Canine Behavior Connection: https://pawsandreward.com/book/

Humane Society of Boulder Valley: https://www.boulderhumane.org/

LIMA and the humane hierarchy: https://m.iaabc.org/about/lima/hierarchy/

The Paws and Reward Podcast episode with Chris Pachel Marissa mentions detailing the humane hierarchy: Episode 47: The Humane Hierarchy with Dr. Chris Pachel

Pet harmony offers mentorships for dog trainers: https://petharmonytraining.com/

Sarah Stremming’s

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/

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If you agonize over decisions, research purchases to death before buying, and weigh the pros and cons seemingly endlessly, then this is the episode for you.

There’s a reason your brain does this. It’s trying to be kind to you. And its kindness often hurts more than it helps.

All is not lost though. We’re not at the mercy of our brains. We actually have a say in things, which is what I explain in the episode.

There may or may not be an anecdote in there about me having to decide on the colors of Rusty’s backpack.

His backpack was made by an awesome woman-owned boutique business in the USA, called Groundbird Gear. They provide your dog with a custom harness to which you can add separable roll-top saddle bags.

I highly recommend them. You can find their website here:

https://www.groundbirdgear.com/

Episode Website (with cute picture of Rusty wearing the above-mentioned backpack :
https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/bonus-episode-015-spinning-in-indecision-why-you-do-it-and-how-to-get-out-of-it/

If the podcast resonates with you and you want to dig a little deeper, coaching is the tool to help you cope better with stressful situations, makes you more confident and daring, and all around feel better.

We're starting a new small group coaching session in July. Read all about it and find more info here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/small-group-coaching/

Get on a free consult to see if it's for you here:

https://kajsavanoverbeek.com/schedule-your-free-consult/