Marriage Lab

Ruminating vs Processing


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Can you tell the difference between when your emotions are hijacking you & when they're helping you? 

Noticing and expressing our emotions is a good thing. In fact, it’s vital for a healthy marriage. But there’s a thin line between naming our emotions and over-identifying with them. That’s where we slip into rumination—looping on the hurt, replaying the offense, and assigning meaning that keeps us stuck.

In this episode, we explore the difference between processing your emotions and looping on them. We’ll look at how the brain responds when you over-identify with a painful feeling, why that keeps you in the spin cycle of stress, and how to shift toward processing in a way that actually heals and moves you forward.

You’ll learn:

  • Why emotions are valuable signals, but sketchy narrators when you over-identify with them
  • How looping recycles pain, while processing frees you—even if your spouse doesn’t respond the way you hoped
  • The simple truth of “Looping hurts me. Processing heals me.”

This episode is all about reclaiming the gift of emotion—without letting it hijack your peace.

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Marriage LabBy Aaron & Jenna Zint

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