A woman is seeing a guy who only grudgingly goes down south. Sex for them always begins with her giving him a BJ, but because they have a Dom/sub dynamic, he feels he doesn't owe her anything. Here's a fun word scramble game that astute Savage Lovecast listeners can play! Unscramble these letters to form the acronym that will give the caller clear direction on what to do: TMAFD

A man is curious, confused, and bewildered about what lesbians mean when they say they have sex. 

On the Magnum, Dan's been talking about bisexual men quite a bit on the show. Are they the luckiest bastards ever, or do they have a rough row to hoe? For this very special "What Are You Doing?" segment, Dan brings on Sam Lent who self-identifies as "A shameless woman who seeks bi men to fuck." How does she search for them? How do bi and straight men differ? And why are the men of Denver so very into pegging? Sam thinks bi men are a national treasure, and we think Sam is pretty awesome. 

A woman's pal has an OnlyFans account. Sometimes this friend stays overnight at the caller's house. The caller saw that her buddy had filmed a session from her house and put it up as content without consulting the caller first. Is it prudish to feel like her home is off-limits?

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This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage.

This episode is brought to you by Dame Products, Sex toys designed by Women, For Women. For 20% off your first order, go to Dame.com and use offer code SAVAGE20

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project.From polyamory, to BDSM, gay rights to sexual health and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

Age gap relationships! Sometimes they are a-ok. Sometimes they are not. A woman is having an argument with her boyfriend about whether his previous relationship was dicey because of the 9-year age difference. She dated a younger person too, but the circumstances were different. Dan Savage (who knows from age gap relationships) weighs in.

A man in a throuple with two ladies can't sleep because their bed gets too toasty at night. Somebody call 911! 

On the Magnum, we welcome back sex & culture writer Magdalene Taylor to talk about gooning, and the gooners who goon all day long. (Gooning is obsessive porn use.) She and Dan talk about conspiracy theories around keeping young men on their phones and disgruntled. And, she and Dan discuss a call from a woman who wants to make sure her NEXT boyfriend wants to have as much sex as she does. 

A gay man was in a casual relationship for 9 months. His hook-up wouldn't ever host because he said he had a "roommate." Guess what! That roommate was actually his husband. Now that the caller is over the burn of being lied to, he's considering letting the sessions continue because the sex is so good. Should he? 

[email protected] 206-302-2064

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Foria is an all natural health & sexual wellness company with product lines using the power of plant actives & CBD to effectively enhance intimacy, sexual pleasure, daily wellbeing, and relief from discomfort. Get 20% off your first order by visiting ForiaWellness.com/Savage

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Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From adult babies, to thruples, trans rights to pansexuality and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

A woman's 74 year-old father has started dating a 19 year-old woman, and no one in her family besides her is batting an eye. She is horrified and refuses to meet the lass or speak to her father until the relationship ends. Is she being too harsh? 

A British poly man has an American girlfriend who comes to visit now and again. She asked him to take her to a sex party, but there's a hitch. She screams to kingdom come during sex. The caller is worried that his more reserved British sex party compatriots will find her conduct unseemly. 

On the Magnum, Dan simply couldn't resist bringing on Sunshyne for a "What Are You Doing?" Sunshyne is a shaggy haired, muppet-faced adonis! He models for multi-national corporations AND has a fin-dom hustle on the side. He and Dan talk about his work, how he got there, and whether women or men give better head. 

A gay man and his boyfriend do not agree about sex. His boyfriend wants monogamy and routine, unadventurous sex. The caller yearns for more sex, and more variety. His boyfriend reluctantly agreed to let him see other people, but only if he uses a condom and tells him every time. But when he does tell, his boyfriend freaks out. So the caller has been sneaking around, seeing sex workers, without using condoms. How can they reconcile? 

Spoiler! They probably can't. 

[email protected]      206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Dame Products, Sex toys designed by Women, For Women. For 20% off your first order, go to Dame.com and use offer code SAVAGE20

This episode is brought to you by Feeld, a dating app where the open-minded can meet the like-minded. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play.

This episode is brought to you by Blueland. Going eco has never been easier. Revolutionary, refillable cleaning essentials eliminating single-use plastic. Right now, get 15% off your first order by going to Blueland.com/Savage

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From sex parties, to pegging, gay rights to monogamy and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

Pages and pages of escort ads. That's what she found on her boyfriend's phone when she was looking for concert tickets. He insisted he wasn't actually contacting anybody, but was using them for his spank bank. Should she believe him? Is this a problem? 

A man recently come out as bi, and has a boyfriend in an open relationship. He sees all the gay orgies that are available to him, but wants to get in on some straight sex party action. Where can he find them? How do they work? Hello? 

On the Magnum, we welcome back fellow advice-slinger Meredith Goldstein of the "Love Letters" advice column and podcast. They talk about how to keep your cool when in the throws of new relationship energy, a mistreated unicorn, and whether choosing a girlfriend based on her anatomy makes you a superficial jerk or not. 

A woman has found a fascinating new partner. He had a spontaneous full-body orgasm at the cafe on their first date. Then, when she bedded him down, she saw that his genitals feature a deeply concave area that gives him a lot of pleasure. She's having a blast! But what's up with him? 

[email protected].   206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage.

This episode is brought to you by Feeld, a dating app where the open-minded can meet the like-minded. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play.

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From unicorns, to monogamy, womens rights to sexual health and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

A married gay man is newly poly with his husband and boyfriend. Simple question: Who should he celebrate Valentine's Day with? 

A non-binary AFAB person frequents a sex club where women pay much less than men or couples. And there's a dress code...men must be naked, and women must wear lingerie. The caller wears the damn lingerie to snag the discount and to get access to men. But they don't want to be addressed as female in dirty talk or recognized as female in any way. Discuss.

On the Magnum, Dan brings back his old college sweetheart, Mike Pesca of The Gist, Not Even Mad, and his new comedy show Funny You Should Mention. Pesca has been covering politics (and sports) for a long time and these two have chemistry! They talked about having sex with Trumpers vs. maintaining familial relations with Maga folk, hot footballmen, and eliminating the penny. And butt sex. 

A woman ended things with a guy she had been seeing for a couple of months, because he felt swoony and she felt "meh." But as time passed, she thinks about him more and more. One year later, she's considering reaching out to him again. Will this just break his heart again? 

[email protected]   206-302-2064

This episode is brought to you by Feeld, a dating app where the open-minded can meet the like-minded. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play.

This episode is brought to you by Dame Products, Sex toys designed by Women, For Women. For 20% off your first order, go to Dame.com and use offer code SAVAGE20

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 27% off site-wide with a mattress order + 2 FREE Dream Pillows! Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From polyamory, to bondage, trans rights to sex education and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

A straight man was accidentally paired with a trans man on a hookup app. When the trans man found out his match was a straight dude, he tapped out. But that got the caller thinking...should he hunt for pre-op trans men in the hopes of connecting with people still had their female parts? Any problems here? 

On the Micro and Magnum it's a sneak peek of this week's Sex & Politics with political analyst Tim Miller. He and Dan took a call from a straight man who has recently discovered the kind of pleasure his own arse can give him, and his enthusiasm cannot be contained. 

On the Magnum, Dan chats with writer Manuel Betancourt, about hooking up with strangers. His book "Hello Stranger: Musings on Modern Intimacies" goes into gay romance, and the allure of chance encounters. He and Dan talk about how "threelationships" can sneak up on you, how the gays (once again) pave the way for honest communication in open relationships, and the WAR between monogamous and polyamorous folk. 

And, a woman is seeing a trans man on the weekends once per month. She heard through the grapevine that he was planning to get bottom surgery. The caller isn't interested in a penis of any kind. Should she say something?  

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 20% off site-wide with a mattress order + 2 FREE Dream Pillows! Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

Foria is an all natural health & sexual wellness company with product lines using the power of plant actives & CBD to effectively enhance intimacy, sexual pleasure, daily wellbeing, and relief from discomfort. Get 20% off your first order by visiting ForiaWellness.com/Savage

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From open relationships to BDSM, trans rights to polyamory and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

A straight man worries that his one-on-one OnlyFans interactions are a form of infidelity. 

A divorced man is out dating and learning about tantra. A couple of women he's seen were both mothers, and although he found them attractive and his dick got hard, he couldn't come with either of them. They both blamed themselves for having changed postpartum bodies. Who is the culprit- the ladies or his dick? 

On the Magnum, Dan chats with cultural historian Kelly Coyne about off-kilter domestic arrangements- married couples who live apart, stay at home dads, and married couples who sleep apart. (Spoiler: it's the snoring!) As usual, straight folks have a lot to learn from gay arrangements. 

And, a woman used to pin her orgasms on cuckold fantasies. But ever since she got into poly relationships, and the thought of her partner sleeping with other women was no longer taboo, her fantasies fail to get her there. How can she rewire her erotic inner life and start to come again?

This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage.

This episode is brought to you by Feeld, a dating app where the open-minded can meet the like-minded. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play.

This episode is brought to you by Liberator: makers of pillows, shapes and furniture for new exciting sex. They’re offering an additional 10% off site-wide; exclusively for our listeners! Go to Liberator.com, and use promo code ‘SAVAGE.’

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From cuckolding, to bisexuality, jealousy to sexual health and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

A gay man is mourning the loss of his hair. He shaved it all off, but doesn't like the new look. Are there any other options? How can he learn to love the new bald version of himself? 

"Big poly mess in aisle 4!" She started seeing a married man who was new to poly. He has a kid, and mere months in, the caller formed a bond with the child. Then he went and fell in love with yet another woman. His wife is divorcing him, but the caller remains friendly with his wife. Can she continue to see the kid? 

Dan chats with sex educator Claire Perelman about how to maintain your libido for the next 4 years.

On the Magnum, it's a new "What Are you Doing?" with Doc Chocolate. He is a former pastor turned porn star and the host of the BULLS & QUEENS show. Doc Chocolate can make all your cuckold fantasies come true. He is also very clever and funny. 

The caller is aunt to a 23 year-old trans woman. But the niece's dad (the caller's brother) refuses to accept that she is trans, and uses the wrong pronouns and her old name. How can the caller help to bring him around?

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 20% off site-wide with a mattress order + 2 FREE Dream Pillows! Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

This episode is brought to you by Feeld, a dating app where the open-minded can meet the like-minded. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play.

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From cuckolding, to Dom/sub, gay rights to sexual health and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

A very happy Feast of The Ass to you all!

We asked you to send us your carols and boy, did you ever deliver. Hear a smattering of our picks, and we unearthed an olde choral piece that you and your family will surely treasure. 

A man has been dating a woman for two months. It's going well, but her body type is too thin to turn him on. He tries to feed her extra food, but should he flat out ask her to gain a little weight? 

On the Magnum, everyone is talking about Babygirl- the new erotic thriller starring Nicolle Kidman. Dan brings on author and podcaster Rebecca Woolf, who has written about women who have been societally shamed or stigmatized for their sexuality, infidelity, and/or refusal to subscribe to social norms. They dish over the movie and argue about the ending. Spoiler city. 

And, a woman's boyfriend makes orgasm noises that repulse the caller. Is there anything to be done? 

This episode is brought to you by Blueland. Going eco has never been easier. Revolutionary, refillable cleaning essentials eliminating single-use plastic. Right now, get 15% off your first order by going to Blueland.com/Savage

This episode is brought to you by Feeld, a dating app where the open-minded can meet the like-minded. Download Feeld on the App Store or Google Play.

Foria is an all natural health & sexual wellness company with product lines using the power of plant actives & CBD to effectively enhance intimacy, sexual pleasure, daily wellbeing, and relief from discomfort. Get 20% off your first order by visiting ForiaWellness.com/Savage

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, and creator of the It Gets Better Project. From polyamory, to BDSM, gay rights to sexual health and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.

Everyone is feverishly preparing for The Feast of The Ass on January 14! Consequently, many of you have questions, such as "What is the proper Feast of the Ass greeting?" And "Shouldn't the official Feast of the Ass dessert be the Tunnel of Fudge?" As always, Dan has the answers. 

A woman's brother just got engaged...again. This is the third time, and he has been dating his current girlfriend for a scant 6 months. What's more, the fiancé has been pestering the caller to be best friends, texting her all day long. The caller has been through this before. Is she a jerk for feeling a little skeptical about her's brother's relationship?  

On the Magnum, it's the return of the Funny Dom! Our favorite Australian sadist is back to help a woman and her boyfriend concoct the perfect mix of BDSM, femme-domming and to get some dang dishes done besides. 

And, a cautionary tale: when you're flying on Molly, and you coquettishly ask "What could I do to be sexier for you?" Beware! He just might answer honestly. 

This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. They make it easy to build a website or blog. Give it a whirl at Squarespace.com/Savage and if you want to buy it, use the code Savage for a 10% off your first purchase.

This episode is brought to you by Hims, providing affordable access to ED treatment, online. Start your free online visit today at Hims.com/Savage.

This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep. Right now, Helix is offering 25% off site-wide with a mattress order + 2 FREE Dream Pillows! Go to HelixSleep.com/Savage. With Helix, better sleep starts now. 

Dan Savage is a sex-advice columnist, podcaster, author, reviver of Midieval Catholic holidays, and creator of the It Gets Better Project.From polyamory, to BDSM, gay rights to sexual health and with a dose of progressive politics, Dan Savage has been cultural force for sex positivity since the 1800s.