The Athletic's Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and Nick Miller put together the most textbook Premier League weekend schedule: from Friday night under the lights at the Emirates, the most Saturday 12.30pm kick-off possible, Manchester City 5 Burnley 0, the phantom untelevised 2pm Sunday game that you’d actually rather be watching instead, futile calls for refereeing consistency and...Monday night under the lights at Goodison.

One regular weekend of Premier League. That's all we ask. Could one day happen.