Secret Habit: Porn Recovery for Christian Men

Looking for lasting freedom from porn? START with one of our 3 options here:

1. Book a Call with our Team to work 1:1 with Coach Shawn: ⁠⁠⁠https://secrethabit.ca/call/⁠⁠⁠

2. Enroll in a DIY Mini Course: ⁠⁠⁠https://secrethabit.thinkific.com/⁠⁠⁠

3. Grab Our Free 90 Day Porn Withdrawal Guide: ⁠⁠⁠https://drive.google.com/file/d/1SIG3jTjSAtEtsqxqHDI8fNG7m9L8mAv5/view?usp=sharing⁠

Rules and roles from our childhood are major contributors that impact all areas of life... Good and bad, they affect us all. In this episode, Shawn and Helena will unpack some of the lessons they learned from the movie Encanto and how family rules and roles impact the way you live today. These findings may very well be one of the greatest "aha moments" for you to begin understanding why you are the way you are, and even more importantly, what you can do about becoming the healthiest version of yourself.

Because childhood trauma can be so deep and even shameful, we wanted to bring a different angle to this topic and hopefully open up the door to some helpful reflection on your end. 

May you begin to see how your childhood has impacted the areas of your life you hold most dear - your faith in God, your marriage, your parenting, your work, etc.

We believe God has some wonderful truths about your rules and roles to live by, and we want you to leave feeling understood, encouraged, and empowered to take the next steps towards healing the deeper parts of your heart.

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Thanks to our friend Drew Boa from Husband Material for his awesome write-up on Encanto and what each character can teach us about ourselves.

Questions we ask in the episode:

I wonder which of these roles might resonate with you?

What role(s) did you play in your family?

What burden or belief do you want to let go of?

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Resources Mentioned:

Restoring The Foundations

Rusty Rustenbach Iner Healing Prayer Book

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To learn more about Shawn and Helena Bonneteau and the work they do, follow them on Instagram:

@secrethabitlifecoaching

Or check out the Secret Habit website for free resources, testimonies, coaching, and programs:

Secrethabit.ca

Looking for lasting freedom from porn? START with one of our 3 options here:

1. Book a Call with our Team to work 1:1 with Coach Shawn: ⁠⁠⁠https://secrethabit.ca/call/⁠⁠⁠

2. Enroll in a DIY Mini Course: ⁠⁠⁠https://secrethabit.thinkific.com/⁠⁠⁠

3. Grab Our Free 90 Day Porn Withdrawal Guide: ⁠⁠⁠https://drive.google.com/file/d/1SIG3jTjSAtEtsqxqHDI8fNG7m9L8mAv5/view?usp=sharing⁠

We are unpacking the often confusing differences between the 2 common types of intimacy. Of course, we will talk about sex too, but be aware, intimacy means so much more than sex. Get ready for a convo between Shawn and Helena as they share from their own stories, findings, victories, and client experiences.

This episode is all about breaking down the stereotypes... High libido and low libido, emotional nature vs. sexual nature, high sex drive and low sex drive, etc... We want to create an open space to courageously share what we have found, so you can realize that what you may be going through is NORMAL!

We want to dig into the beautiful idea of what it means to get our true longings met so you can experience fulfillment as an emotional and sexual being made in the image of God...  This is what we see as the ultimate version of sexual health!

Tune in and learn some great tips that will certainly enhance your marriage, intimacy and sex life!

We spend a considerable amount of time unpacking the "sexual template" which we will unpack further in future episodes. To grab the mini-course and begin working on your very own sexual template, check out the course page here:

https://secrethabit.ca/overcoming-erectile-dysfunction-mini-course/

We mention a few people in this episode:

Gabor Mate: you can learn more about him here

Drew Boa and Husband Material: You can learn more about him here

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To learn more about Shawn and Helena Bonneteau and the work they do, follow them on Instagram:

@secrethabitlifecoaching

Or check out the Secret Habit website for free resources, testimonies, coaching, and programs:

Secrethabit.ca

Looking for lasting freedom from porn? START with one of our 3 options here:

1. Book a Call with our Team to work 1:1 with Coach Shawn: ⁠⁠⁠https://secrethabit.ca/call/⁠⁠⁠

2. Enroll in a DIY Mini Course: ⁠⁠⁠https://secrethabit.thinkific.com/⁠⁠⁠

3. Grab Our Free 90 Day Porn Withdrawal Guide: ⁠⁠⁠https://drive.google.com/file/d/1SIG3jTjSAtEtsqxqHDI8fNG7m9L8mAv5/view?usp=sharing⁠

In this very real and open conversation, Shawn and Helena unpack the nature of sexual brokenness and sexual shame - what it is, how it plays out, and what we can do to better understand what it's telling us. They offer insights from working with men and women all over the world dealing with this topic. On the same note, they contrast how sexual brokenness/shame actually reveals the way to deeper healing and how it can be the catalyst to developing sexual integrity.

Because we so often hear the world and especially the church talking only about quitting porn, quitting masturbation, and focusing on avoiding the areas of our sexuality, this conversation about pursuing sexual integrity is rather refreshing. A life of greater purpose is something Shawn and Helena believe is foundational to true healing that lasts the tests of time.

May this be a help for you and your faith walk, as men and women who want to have a healthy marriage, thriving sex life, and experience purity in a way that is actually freeing and wholesome.

Listen in for 3 practical steps that offer you a great place to begin your journey from sexual brokenness to sexual integrity.

Books/People mentioned in this episode include:

Re-Thinking Sexuality by Dr. Julie Slattery

Unwanted by Jay Stringer

The Great Sex Rescue by Sheila Gregoire

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Shawn has created 2 DIY mini-courses focused on helping you find lasting freedom from porn, as well as erectile dysfunction:

https://secrethabit.ca/quitting-porn-mini-course/

https://secrethabit.ca/overcoming-erectile-dysfunction-mini-course/

Helena has her new Betrayal Trauma Healing program up and we want you to know about it!

https://secrethabit.ca/betrayaltraumaonlinecourse/

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To learn more about Shawn and Helena Bonneteau and the work they do, follow them on Instagram:

@secrethabitlifecoaching

Or check out the Secret Habit website for free resources, testimonies, coaching, and programs:

Secrethabit.ca

Shawn Bonneteau is the co-founder of Secret Habit Life Coaching and the co-host of the Secret Habit podcast. He is a Certified Coach with Husband Material and a Certified Mentor through Bravehearts and is on a mission to help Christian men experience sexual integrity. He is a firm believer that God's design for sexuality is better than we imagine and is on a mission to help men become sexually healthy and all they were created to be

In this episode, you will learn about Shawn's story - one of addiction to porn, sex, and masturbation, ultimately the pursuit of acceptance, or so he thought. He found all he was longing for in a place he never expected... and this fulfillment has been the foundation of the life he has today with his Helena. A life of sexual integrity, a marriage that is thriving, a family that is healthy, and a faith in Jesus Christ that is constantly growing deeper.

Shawn has a deep passion to help men not only quit pornography but to outgrow porn! This is done by helping them become men of character, faith, and integrity which leads to a life of holistic health... Ultimately it leads to a life where there is freedom from things like sexual addiction, shame, and dysfunction and it opens the door to a life of freedom for God's purpose and healthy relationships.

3 Focal Points From This Episode:

#1 - What it means to actually surrender to God

#2 - What it looks like to have a helpful community and a guide in recovery from porn

#3 - What transformation of a trauma story through God looks like

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If you’ve been listening to this and you feel stuck or unclear, I want to invite you into a conversation.

This isn’t about pressure or selling you something.It’s a space to slow things down, look at what’s actually going on, and help you get clear on the problem so you can start seeing the right path forward.

If that would be helpful for you, you can book a free call with me here:👉 ⁠secrethabit.ca/call⁠

If you’re not ready for that step yet, you can start with my free Porn Withdrawal Survival Guide:👉 ⁠https://secrethabit.ca/porn-addiction-withdrawal-symptoms/⁠

And if you want to learn more about me and the work I do, you can head here:👉 ⁠shawnbonneteau.com⁠

Helena Bonneteau is the co-founder of Secret Habit Life Coaching and the co-host of the Secret Habit podcast. She is a Certified Coach through Husband Material and a Certified Mentor with Bravehearts and is on a mission to help Christian women give their pain a voice. She is a firm believer that Gods design for sexuality is better than we imagine and wants to help men and women experience all it has to offer. 

In this episode, you will learn about Helena's story - one of addiction to pornography, navigating toxic relationships, an eating disorder, sexual abuse, betrayal trauma, and ultimately the pursuit of love, or so she thought. She found love in a place she never expected... and this love has been the foundation of the life she has today with Shawn. A life of sexual integrity, a marriage that is thriving, a family that is healthy, and a faith in Jesus Christ that is constantly growing deeper.

Helena has a deep passion to help Christian women give their pain a voice. She does this by helping them holistically heal from betrayal trauma and the sexual brokenness they have experienced in their lives. She is also an advocate for women's health in the areas of fertility, body image, and the body as a beautiful creation by God.

To learn more about Helena's work, and her newest program on Betrayal Trauma Recovery, check out

https://secrethabit.ca/betrayaltraumaonlinecourse

If you’ve been listening to this and you feel stuck or unclear, I want to invite you into a conversation.

This isn’t about pressure or selling you something.
It’s a space to slow things down, look at what’s actually going on, and help you get clear on the problem so you can start seeing the right path forward.

If that would be helpful for you, you can book a free call with me here:
👉 secrethabit.ca/call

If you’re not ready for that step yet, you can start with my free Porn Withdrawal Survival Guide:
👉 https://secrethabit.ca/porn-addiction-withdrawal-symptoms/

And if you want to learn more about me and the work I do, you can head here:
👉 shawnbonneteau.com

We are Shawn & Helena Bonneteau and we are so pumped to share a snapshot of our story with you. We both come from very sexually broken pasts full of sexual abuse, pornography addiction, masturbation addiction, pre-marital sex, betrayal trauma, body objectification, and erectile dysfunction. Because we have gone through the school of hard knocks and experienced so much pain in our young lives, we truly know what it's like to be stuck in the darkness of sexual brokenness and shame. 

In this episode, you will hear about this, however, you will also hear about the incredible healing in our lives, and this is really why we are here... to bring you hope, truth, and an example to relate to and glean from.

Shawn and Helena are both Certified Professional Mentors and Certified Coaches in the area of sexual addiction and recovery and have been able to coach and mentor people all over the world who want to quit porn, heal betrayal trauma and live in sexual purity.

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If you’ve been listening to this and you feel stuck or unclear, I want to invite you into a conversation.

This isn’t about pressure or selling you something.It’s a space to slow things down, look at what’s actually going on, and help you get clear on the problem so you can start seeing the right path forward.

If that would be helpful for you, you can book a free call with me here:👉 ⁠secrethabit.ca/call⁠

If you’re not ready for that step yet, you can start with my free Porn Withdrawal Survival Guide:👉 ⁠https://secrethabit.ca/porn-addiction-withdrawal-symptoms/⁠

And if you want to learn more about me and the work I do, you can head here:👉 ⁠shawnbonneteau.com⁠

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Shoutout to Pure Desire mentioned in the show who have an awesome podcast!

Looking for lasting freedom from porn? START with one of our 3 options here:

1. Book a Call with our Team to work 1:1 with Coach Shawn: ⁠⁠⁠https://secrethabit.ca/call/⁠⁠⁠

2. Enroll in a DIY Mini Course: ⁠⁠⁠https://secrethabit.thinkific.com/⁠⁠⁠

3. Grab Our Free 90 Day Porn Withdrawal Guide: ⁠⁠⁠https://drive.google.com/file/d/1SIG3jTjSAtEtsqxqHDI8fNG7m9L8mAv5/view?usp=sharing⁠

May this introduction inspire you and get you fired up for what's in store. We are Shawn & Helena Bonneteau and we are so excited to bring you real, raw, and relatable stories, teachings, and insights all focused on understanding and experiencing Godly sexuality.

Join us on this journey as we share the motivation that drives the Secret Habit podcast... and a hint, it's all about you! Because we have gone through so much pain and suffering in our own personal and marital journeys to get to where we're at today, we want to offer you what we wish we had when we were really struggling with the harmful effects of porn. May this episode leave you feeling understood, encouraged, and hopeful that you are never alone. We believe God's design for sexuality offers the greatest satisfaction and we want you to let our failures be your success in finding this for yourself.

You can look forward to weekly episodes digging into topics that are really hard to talk about... we want you to leave each time feeling like sexual satisfaction in Christ is FOR YOU no matter where you're at right now.

We know what it's like to go through the wringer of porn addiction, masturbation, sexual addiction/dysfunction, betrayal trauma, and the shame it all brings... Because of this, we want to help you avoid the pits we fell into so you can experience sexuality as it was intended... TO BE BEAUTIFUL AND SATISFYING.

Stay tuned for future episodes that dive into how to quit porn, healing betrayal trauma, overcoming erectile dysfunction, Christian sex in marriage, and all other things that tie into becoming sexually healthy. We ultimately want you to experience sexual healing that leads to sexual integrity and wholeness in God.

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To learn more about Secret Habit Life Coaching and the work they do, follow them on Instagram:

@secrethabitlifecoaching

Or check out the Secret Habit website for free resources, testimonies, coaching, and programs:

Secrethabit.ca

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*There's a small edit error that was no longer reversible by the time we caught it. We are extending ourselves grace as we learn the ropes of podcasting/editing :)