Settled

Today, we're diving deep into the transformative idea of shifting our perspective in marriage from a right-and-wrong paradigm to one focused on relationship and union. This episode is all about how this change can lead to healthier, more fulfilling connections with our partners. We share personal stories and insights on how the constant battle of who's right can create distance and competition in a relationship, ultimately leading to feelings of isolation. Instead, we emphasize the importance of valuing connection over competition, encouraging listeners to see their partners as friends rather than rivals. Join us as we explore how embracing this paradigm shift can enrich our marriages and bring us closer to the true essence of partnership.

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• We discussed the crucial paradigm shift in marriage from a right-wrong mentality to one focused on relationship and union.
• The importance of prioritizing connection over competition in a marriage cannot be overstated; it truly transforms how partners relate to each other.
• When we focus on who's right or wrong, we inevitably create distance and isolation in our relationships, which ultimately leads to disconnection.
• A key takeaway is that our identity in marriage should not be tied to performance metrics but rather to the richness of our mutual friendship and connection.
• Shifting our perspective on marriage requires a commitment to see our partners as friends, fostering a bond that thrives on mutual respect and understanding.
• The essence of a healthy marriage is found in valuing life and connection over performance, as this leads to a more fulfilling and vibrant relationship.

Mentioned in this episode:

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Journey

This FREE 5-day journey helps you silence the noise, reconnect with your soul, and rediscover the presence of God already dwelling within you. Reclaim your inner world, confront false voices, and discover the Kingdom of God within.

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28 | Grapevine, TX

Feeling weary from carrying the weight of caring for others? The Settled Conference is two intentional days to slow down, hear God's voice, experience healing, and return to the settled identity that's always been yours. Reserve your seat now using the link below.

Forgiveness and grief are essential components of a thriving marriage, and this episode dives into why they often go hand in hand. We unpack how both concepts serve as a process of metabolizing our pain, much like our bodies process food. Jason and I share our insights from 26 years of marriage, emphasizing that whether we grieve first or forgive first, the important thing is to recognize they are two sides of the same coin. We also explore the idea that emotional constipation can occur when we fail to process our feelings, leading to resentment and distance in our relationships. By understanding and practicing forgiveness and grief, we can clear the air, allowing our marriages to flourish and grow in healthy ways.

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• Forgiveness and grief are interconnected processes that require time and emotional regulation.
• In marriage, it's essential to process disappointments through grief and forgiveness to avoid resentment.
• We create emotional attachments to distorted versions of our spouses, making forgiveness crucial for clarity.
• Engaging in honest lamenting and grieving can help clear emotional 'constipation' and lead to healthier relationships.

Mentioned in this episode:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28 | Grapevine, TX

Feeling weary from carrying the weight of caring for others? The Settled Conference is two intentional days to slow down, hear God's voice, experience healing, and return to the settled identity that's always been yours. Reserve your seat now using the link below.

Supporting Us Through This Journey

As many of you know, Jason was recently diagnosed with stage four stomach cancer. If you'd like to support him and this podcast financially, you can donate using this link. All gifts are tax-deductible. Learn more at settledco.com/jason.

Donate

Today, we’re diving deep into the concept of “unity with distinction” in marriage and how it reflects the nature of God. It’s not just about being one; it's about being beautifully distinct while still coming together as a cohesive unit. We explore how the Trinity serves as a powerful model for understanding this dynamic: each person of the Godhead is unique yet unified, which provides a profound framework for our relationships. We discuss the importance of recognizing and articulating our individual needs and preferences in marriage, as failing to do so can lead to enmeshment and loss of identity. Join us as we navigate the colorful metaphor of blending two distinct colors to create something new—because in a healthy marriage, it’s all about bringing our true selves to the table while celebrating the unity that comes from our distinctiveness.

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• In marriage, achieving unity with distinction is crucial; it reflects the Trinity's nature.
• We must recognize and communicate our individual needs and preferences for a healthy marriage.
• Unity in marriage does not mean losing our individuality; it enhances our partnership and growth.
• Creating a safe space in a relationship allows both partners to express their true selves without fear.

Mentioned in this episode:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28 | Grapevine, TX

Feeling weary from carrying the weight of caring for others? The Settled Conference is two intentional days to slow down, hear God's voice, experience healing, and return to the settled identity that's always been yours. Reserve your seat now using the link below.

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Journey

This FREE 5-day journey helps you silence the noise, reconnect with your soul, and rediscover the presence of God already dwelling within you. Reclaim your inner world, confront false voices, and discover the Kingdom of God within.

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

We're diving into the complexities of marriage and how it reflects our relationship with Christ. As we share our own journey of 26 years together, we explore the idea that marriage isn't about losing ourselves in our partner but discovering our true selves through the relationship. We discuss how our experiences, both joyful and challenging, can lead us to a deeper understanding of ourselves and our spouse, allowing us to grow together rather than lose our individual identities. Whether you're married or single, the principles we discuss are relevant to any relationship, emphasizing the importance of knowing God in the midst of our connections with others. Join us as we navigate the rewarding and sometimes rocky path of finding ourselves within the sacred union of marriage.

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• In our marriage series, we emphasize the importance of finding your true self in Christ while navigating relationships with others.
• We believe that marriage should reflect the relationship between Christ and the church, fostering individuality rather than enmeshment.
• I've learned that in marriage, we can mirror each other, helping our partners discover their true selves while also confronting our flaws.
• It's crucial to understand that finding yourself in marriage doesn't mean losing your identity, but rather enriching it through your partner's influence.

Mentioned in this episode:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28 | Grapevine, TX

Feeling weary from carrying the weight of caring for others? The Settled Conference is two intentional days to slow down, hear God's voice, experience healing, and return to the settled identity that's always been yours. Reserve your seat now using the link below.

Supporting Us Through This Journey

As many of you know, Jason was recently diagnosed with stage four stomach cancer. If you'd like to support him and this podcast financially, you can donate using this link. All gifts are tax-deductible. Learn more at settledco.com/jason.

Donate

Today, we're diving deep into the often misunderstood topic of judgment, as we wrap up our series on scriptures that tend to get a bad rap. We’re riffing off John 12:31-32, where Jesus reveals the transformative power of his sacrifice—an act that draws all of humanity to him, not just a select few. It’s crucial to recognize that when we add words like "peoples" for clarity, we might unintentionally diminish the profound truth of Jesus’ statement; all means all, and that’s a big deal! We’ll explore how this understanding impacts our lives, especially when we grapple with feelings of guilt and inadequacy. Ultimately, it’s about embracing the fullness of Christ’s work, which invites us to relax and rest in our reconciled identities, free from the burden of striving.

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• In this episode, we discussed how adding words to scripture, like 'peoples', can actually diminish the original meaning of Jesus's powerful message.
• We explored the idea that Jesus's judgment encompasses all, challenging the notion that we need to do anything to earn our place in his reconciliation.
• The symbolism of the bronze serpent in the Old Testament highlights how Jesus takes on all judgment and sin, inviting us to look upon him for healing.
• Understanding that belief in Christ is a gift allows us to experience the fullness of his work without feeling we need to add anything to it.

Mentioned in this episode:

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Journey

This FREE 5-day journey helps you silence the noise, reconnect with your soul, and rediscover the presence of God already dwelling within you. Reclaim your inner world, confront false voices, and discover the Kingdom of God within.

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28 | Grapevine, TX

Feeling weary from carrying the weight of caring for others? The Settled Conference is two intentional days to slow down, hear God's voice, experience healing, and return to the settled identity that's always been yours. Reserve your seat now using the link below.

We’re diving into some scriptures that can really freak us out, specifically one that we like to call the “scary Jesus scripture.” It comes from Matthew 7, where Jesus starkly declares, “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven.” As we explore this passage, we’ll unpack the fears and misconceptions that often arise around it, especially the notion that knowing Jesus is simply about ticking boxes of good deeds. We’ll discuss how this scripture invites us to reflect on our relationship with Him—not in terms of what we do, but in terms of being genuinely known by Him. So, grab a comfy seat and let’s settle into this conversation that challenges us to rethink what it means to truly connect with Jesus.

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• We discussed some scriptures that can be easily misunderstood, particularly a scary Jesus scripture that challenges our understanding.
• The passage in Matthew 7 emphasizes that not everyone who claims to know Jesus will enter the kingdom, which can be alarming but is an invitation to deeper understanding.
• We need to move past a performative faith and seek a genuine relationship with Jesus, understanding that He desires intimacy over mere actions.
• The notion of knowing Jesus goes beyond cognitive understanding; it's about being known by Him and being vulnerable in that relationship.

Mentioned in this episode:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28 | Grapevine, TX

Feeling weary from carrying the weight of caring for others? The Settled Conference is two intentional days to slow down, hear God's voice, experience healing, and return to the settled identity that's always been yours. Reserve your seat now using the link below.

Supporting Us Through This Journey

As many of you know, Jason was recently diagnosed with stage four stomach cancer. If you'd like to support him and this podcast financially, you can donate using this link. All gifts are tax-deductible. Learn more at settledco.com/jason.

Donate

This week, we're diving into the scriptures that often leave us scratching our heads and feeling a bit frustrated. Join us as we tackle the misunderstandings surrounding these texts, starting with 2 Corinthians 12, where the phrase “when I am weak, then I am strong” flips the script on what weakness truly means. We believe it’s not about God’s strength being contingent on our weakness, but rather an invitation to embrace the paradox of our human experience. Throughout the conversation, we’ll explore how holding both weakness and strength can lead to a more authentic relationship with God and ourselves. So, grab your favorite beverage and settle in as we unravel these truths and share some laughs along the way!

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• This episode dives deep into the misinterpretations of scripture that often frustrate us, especially ones that twist the meaning around weakness and strength.
• We emphasize the importance of understanding the true message behind 2 Corinthians 12, which clarifies that our weakness can actually be a source of strength.
• As we prepare for our upcoming Settled Conference, we invite our listeners to join us for a transformative two-day experience that can change their lives.
• The conversation highlights how vulnerability in our weaknesses can create genuine connections with others, rather than the facade of strength that often isolates us.
• We explore how admitting our struggles can lead to a deeper understanding of God's grace, which is sufficient for every thorn we carry in life.
• Through sharing our weaknesses, we invite God's perfected power to shine through, reminding us that we're never alone in our struggles.

Mentioned in this episode:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28 | Grapevine, TX

Feeling weary from carrying the weight of caring for others? The Settled Conference is two intentional days to slow down, hear God's voice, experience healing, and return to the settled identity that's always been yours. Reserve your seat now using the link below.

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Journey

This FREE 5-day journey helps you silence the noise, reconnect with your soul, and rediscover the presence of God already dwelling within you. Reclaim your inner world, confront false voices, and discover the Kingdom of God within.

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

We're diving deep into the concept of freedom this week, focusing on what it means to live from our reconciled selves in Christ. It's a profound exploration of how our understanding of freedom shapes our lives and choices. We discuss the importance of agreeing with who we are in Christ, not just striving to become something else, and how this reconciled identity empowers us to navigate life's challenges, including serious health struggles. As we confront our own difficulties, like Jason's recent cancer diagnosis, we reflect on the tension between life and death and the invitation to name the things that roam within us. Ultimately, we emphasize that true freedom is found in recognizing and living from our already reconciled selves, allowing us to tend to our inner gardens with confidence and authority.

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• We discussed how true freedom is about living from our reconciled self in Christ, not striving to earn our worth.
• Our journey back to our true selves is about recognizing and naming the beasts that distract us from our identity.
• We emphasized the importance of defining freedom correctly, as a misdefinition can lead us into confusion and bondage.
• In facing challenges like illness, we can still affirm our identity in Christ, saying, 'The cancer doesn't have me.'
• Tending to our inner garden means naming both the positive and negative aspects of our lives, empowering us to live authentically.
• We reminded ourselves that our will is healed in Christ, allowing us to pursue true freedom without fear of performance.

Mentioned in this episode:

Supporting Us Through This Journey

As many of you know, Jason was recently diagnosed with stage four stomach cancer. If you'd like to support him and this podcast financially, you can donate using this link. All gifts are tax-deductible. Learn more at settledco.com/jason.

Donate

Supporting Us Through This Journey

As many of you know, Jason was recently diagnosed with stage four stomach cancer. If you'd like to support him and this podcast financially, you can donate using this link. All gifts are tax-deductible. Learn more at settledco.com/jason.

Donate

Freedom is fully accepting oneself as a child of God and living from that identity. In today’s conversation, we dive deep into the framework of what freedom truly means in our spiritual journeys. We’ve all grappled with definitions and frameworks that have kept us in bondage, so we're here to challenge those misconceptions. By exploring our identities in Christ, we come to realize that acceptance is not about striving to become something but recognizing who we already are. We share personal insights and transformations that have led us to a more restful, centered place, where we can embrace our true selves and live authentically in God’s love. Join us as we unwrap these profound truths and encourage each other to rest in our identity as beloved children of God.

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• Freedom is fully accepting oneself as a child of God and living from that identity, which is a profound truth for many.
• In our journey, we often grapple with poor definitions and frameworks that hinder our understanding of what true freedom means.
• We discussed how embracing our identity as children of God allows us to relinquish the need for performance and striving.
• Transformation happens at the pace of rest, emphasizing the importance of a restful posture in our lives and faith.

Mentioned in this episode:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28 | Grapevine, TX

Feeling weary from carrying the weight of caring for others? The Settled Conference is two intentional days to slow down, hear God's voice, experience healing, and return to the settled identity that's always been yours. Reserve your seat now using the link below.

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Journey

This FREE 5-day journey helps you silence the noise, reconnect with your soul, and rediscover the presence of God already dwelling within you. Reclaim your inner world, confront false voices, and discover the Kingdom of God within.

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

We're diving into the concept of freedom this week, exploring how we frame it within our ministry, and sharing an update on my ongoing battle with cancer. We’ve been through a whirlwind of emotions and medical jargon that felt pretty dire, but we’re grateful to have found a more hopeful team to support us. It’s been a journey of understanding that true freedom is less about being boundaryless and more about knowing how to receive and give love uninhibited. We often hear the phrases “love God, love people,” but we need to ask ourselves: are we taught how to receive love? This episode is all about recognizing the importance of receiving love first so we can genuinely share it with others. Join us as we unpack these ideas and reflect on how our understanding of freedom can lead to deeper connections in our lives.

Resources:

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28, 2026

For Updates on Jason's Journey: settledco.com/jason

Reclaim What's Real 5-Day Jouney

Settled Design Course

Free 30 Minute Biblical Counseling Session

Linktree - https://linktr.ee/settledco

Connect with us:

Website - https://settledco.com

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/settled.co/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61552836102590

YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@settledpodcast

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/company/settledco/

Takeaways:

• In our journey through faith, we emphasize the importance of framing freedom within the context of our ministry and personal experiences.
• Receiving love from God is essential for our ability to love ourselves and others without inhibition, fostering true freedom in our lives.
• A framework for understanding freedom includes recognizing boundaries that allow love to thrive, rather than seeing freedom as simply absence of restrictions.
• Our personal struggles and experiences shape how we perceive and express love, often revealing deeper issues related to self-worth and acceptance.

Mentioned in this episode:

Supporting Us Through This Journey

As many of you know, Jason was recently diagnosed with stage four stomach cancer. If you'd like to support him and this podcast financially, you can donate using this link. All gifts are tax-deductible. Learn more at settledco.com/jason.

Donate

Settled Conference - Aug. 27-28 | Grapevine, TX

Feeling weary from carrying the weight of caring for others? The Settled Conference is two intentional days to slow down, hear God's voice, experience healing, and return to the settled identity that's always been yours. Reserve your seat now using the link below.