Shadow Playground

Do we dare take up space in public, creating beautiful moments of social connection even at the risk of annoying people or being rejected by doing so ? Jacques W. Martiquet does exactly this, doing the social reps to bring joy to the planet while navigating the complexity of disruption, party science, consent, and the latent potential in every group. 

-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

Jacques W. Martiquet is on a mission to end the rise of loneliness and depression. Known as the International Party Scientist, he has been interviewed by VICE, CTV, Global News and Elle. After completing his degree in Pharmacology, he traveled to 13 countries igniting hundreds of sober parties in public spaces. He's on Earth to equip innovative leaders with science-based human connection tools for their company events, so that their wellness & culture budget translates into lasting results.

More about Jacques: 

https://www.linkedin.com/in/thepartyscientist/

https://thepartyscientist.com/

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Take social risks to enable other people to feel safe to take them as well.
• Do social reps to detach from other peoples’ reactions & judgement (ex. laugh like a maniac, wave at people, etc.) 
• To develop a stronger capacity to take risks, start journaling and practice introspection; the barriers are personal.
• With a group, start with mindfulness, gratitude, and stretching to bring people into the moment. Then, raise the threshold of acceptable expression. 
• If you are in public and facilitating without a container, create a new context to support the interactions. 
• Look at the thought patterns and people in your social circle that aren't supporting you and replace them. 
• To prepare yourself for joy facilitation, put your feet up against the wall, take deep breaths, put music on, and do visualizations that connect you to moments of joy. Then dance, and bring yourself energy by connecting to the people in your session. 

IDEAS: 

• We can all be facilitators of shared experiences in our gathering spaces.
• Social risk taking has more rewards than potential harm. 
• When you take a risk as a facilitator and are rejected, remind yourself that you are developing your capacity to serve groups. When you fail, it means you are becoming better. 
• Many facilitators don't want to make people uncomfortable. What if we viewed safety through the lens of expanding our boundaries? 
• So much of our ability to have fun is a reflection of our physiology.
• In conflict, embrace a fail forward mentality. 
• It is a red flag if there is no conflict in a relationship - the no is what allows you to trust someone’s yes. 
• In every group, the pro-social energy is latent. When we synchronize the group, we unlock energy that wasn't possible if everyone was doing their own thing.

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Nadia Chaney is a master arts facilitator, a talented artist, and a beautiful friend. In this conversation, she offers pathways to break free from a search for constant productivity and to gently orient ourselves in the direction of play and uselessness. 

-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

Nadia is a multi-disciplinary artist, community arts facilitator and facilitation trainer. She is known for her ability to clarify and simplify complex concepts, to work joyfully with participant resistance and challenging dynamics, to engage powerful diversity and inclusion practices, and for her creative and bold arts-based group process design. She is the founder of The Time Zone Research Lab (community arts-based research into the nature of Time) and Toolsi (on demand facilitation training).

More about Nadia Chaney:

www.nadiachaney.com

https://www.linkedin.com/in/nadia-chaney-59637021/

https://www.instagram.com/eternalflux_/

 Link to Toolsi: https://facilitate.toolsi.ca/

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES: 

• Oracular Poetry - a process to answer unanswerable questions.
• Play with acausal stories, maps & drawings with children. 
• To tune into the group, expand to the underlying mind in the room. Where does it want to go ? 
• Use psychodrama to explore other forms and ways of knowing that are transpersonal.
• Use the metaphor of moving from the small room to the big room to get a wider perspective through regulation of the nervous system.
• Visualization practices where you travel to a safe space as well as anchoring gestures can help us regulate our nervous systems by slightly adjusting the dial. 
• Shaking is a baby step towards dance and the disinhibition of dance.
• Build up embodied experience with the tools before you need them. 
• Go for a walk without a destination. 

IDEAS: 

Play

• If they can fail at it, it's not play, even if it's a game. You can lose but you can't fail. 
• In play, we open our senses to the swirl of possibility and where the playful can take fire. 
• Place requires preparation (what made the container possible) and has repercussions after having been disinhibited.
• An ensemble mentality requires having your senses open so wide that you move, see and breathe together.
• Play has no usefulness in that way. It is useful but it doesn't have a use function. There is an emancipatory side to it: can I take time to do what I want, without getting better ? Can I simply be in pleasure ? 

A culture of extraction 

• In a capitalist structure, so many things are considered useless until they are sucked up. Yet, those things that are useless and abject are also beautiful and valuable. This also goes for relationships. We can strive to this inner state of non-succumbing to effectiveness and usefulness. 
• Study can also be play when you take away the burden of being efficient. 
• What is on the other side of the current of productivity is where innovation lives. 

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What does it take to be true, to be anchored in our hearts and to let our light shine out, even as the going gets tough ? Juanita Giraldo Bueno does all these things with strength and vulnerability as part of her life centering practices, both as an individual and in intentional community. 

-GUEST BIOGRAPHY-

It is with her radiant joy and contagious enthusiasm that Juanita accompanies beings to connect with their own powerful inner confidence, to realize their true nature and manifest their dearest aspirations. With her unconditional love for life, passages and transformation, she guides those that seek through the process of liberation.

Her work is supported by deep workshops and rituals based on the traditional and timeless teachings she received from Tibetan Buddhism, Yogic traditions and Indigenous and Shamanic lineages. Her unique, effective and authentic approach offers everyone a unique chance to transcend the futile towards a life of expansion and sublime ecstasy.

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES 

• Create an event using principles of theater, ceremony and storytelling. 
• Connect to a part of yourself or an emotion and express it through your body. Allow the energy to just pass through and stay in movement. 
• Surround yourself with people and allies to hold the space for your changing, growing and expanding love. 
• Explore tools to be in dialogue together: non-violent communication, social permaculture, conscious communication, forum Zegg.

IDEAS

Aligning with the voice of the heart 

• When we are born, we are all glowing and that glow and vital energy continues to always be there.
• There are many ways to find the voice of the heart. It's about shedding layers until we find what is true for us. This process is fun, and can also involve going through a lot of darkness.
• This voice refers to whatever is actually there. For instance, if you have to make a choice but you are unsure, you can simply own that you are unsure.  
• In your transformation process, allow yourself to remain curious as the alignment becomes more and more subtle. Furthermore, it's not an end point - you can simply embrace the journey, keeping a commitment to keep moving towards the emergent truth. 
• Focusing on walking our path and being in our alignment creates a natural joy that ripples out. The more love you have for yourself and your community, the easier it is to spread the love. 
• All places are divine, and we connect with magic when we are all in our own divine place. Ordinary moments just glow. 
• We also need to be able to allow for the death of beliefs & constructs. By shedding, we die and are reborn each day. Each day there is more space and we are more luminous. 

Conflict  

• Conflict is a mirror for ourselves, and it always allows us to grow. 
• We need to learn to take responsibility (what can you own), name how we are feeling, forgive, see ourselves, and listen with our hearts. If you have owned everything and something else isn't owning their side, you can respectfully just move away. Connect to your 'no' - it is power. 
• Try to see the person as they are versus how you think they should be. 
• Balance your love with boundaries, and remember that to give love we need to love ourselves.  
• We can keep walking with love, truth, discovery and curiosity, accepting the rough conflict mirrors that help us polish and grow. This is the divine and sacred play.

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Navigating a world that shuts down our authentic selves means that navigating spaces of play and creativity can be terrifying. In this enlightening conversation, Parneet breaks down why shame is so toxic, and pathways to bring our shadows to the light.

Parneet is a human being inspired by the resilience and healing abilities of the human heart, mind and body. Her life is oriented towards the liberation and wholeness of all beings including herself. Parneet works as a counsellor and somatic experiencing practitioner in private practice, as well as a mindfulness and authentic relating facilitator. 

PRACTICE 

• Dancing to house music - a channel for love, freedom, connection & community. 
• Question why a creative practice keeps being postponed - what is getting in the way of spontaneously erupting into play ? 
• Use a sock puppet to externalize shame, or allow the shame itself to be the artistic director of a project. 
• To work with shadow, bring it to the light and see what it has to say. We just need to be big enough, brave enough, and compassionate enough.
• We need to biologically prepare for conflict - sleep, eating, the day of the week, etc. 

IDEAS 

Shadow

• Shadow is the unconscious hidden, repressed and denied parts of ourselves that the ego has rejected. Those shadow parts are secretly behind the wheel. 
• People are terrified of being themselves for a reason. It often connects to childhood moments when someone’s authentic version was judged or shamed. 
• When shadow is just reacting to being repressed, we are actually just seeing the reaction of shadow, not the shadow itself. 
• So much healing can happen when we observe, notice, welcome, love and embrace shadow. It dissolves naturally as it doesn’t want to be there. 
• We are always in relationship with shadow. Often, its impulse is to protect. 

Shame 

• It is so vulnerable to be seen when there is the possibility of being evaluated for something that is heart centered. 
• Sometimes being seen can take you out of your creative vibe. 
• Shame has a biological function as an inhibitor in service of social belonging and good social connections. It becomes generalized however; instead of being connected to something we are doing, it becomes attached to an essence. This is why identity related traumas are so confusing - the shame is about 'me'. This needs to end. 
• To let shame go, we need to trust we will remain connected to our essence. For some of us, our entire lives have been shaped by shame. 

Intersectionality & play 

• The discernment - am I safe or am I in danger - is a constant assessment as a queer racialized person. 
• Intersectionality affects everything when it comes to playfulness.
• People who are silly & playful have the privilege of feeling safe to do so. We can have compassion for the microaggressions that have gotten in the way of other people not being able to show up playfully. 
• Safety is a prerequisite to play & creativity. 

Conflict 

• Conflict requires a strong container, otherwise the nervous system will seek to protect you. 
• I've seen conflict resolve beautifully, with deeper and more loving & trusting relationships when there is intentionality, consent and a container. 

Group Facilitation 

Move away from predict and control to sense and respond when working with groups. 

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How can we create spaces where we balance compassion with uplifting boundaries and a touch of chaos ? An honest exploration with Monica Paraghamian.

Monica Paraghamian (she/her/elle) is an educator, artist and entrepreneur. When she isn’t singing gospel or working on the second edition of her children’s book on mindfulness, she’s designing and facilitating learning experiences for youth and adults. Monica believes that every person is chalk-full of talents, and that much of life is about the unfolding and exploration of these. 

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICE 

• Sing an operatic version of la vie en rose. 
• Enact characters through musical improvisation. 
• Put on an accent and do a prank call.
• Junk playgrounds. Children go in, and figure it out ! 
• Spoil yourself for the day. 
• Explore abandoned buildings.
• Simply hold the space when someone shares a long winded story. The goal isn’t to fix problems - people figure it out & everything will be ok. 
• Experiment with different plot structures for experience design. Ex. the conclusion at the beginning. 

IDEAS

Play 

• Play is having fun and not worrying about outcomes while not harming anyone. 

Creative sharing

• Putting someone on the spot is not conducive to some sharing.  
• The key to expressing yourself is your relation to the craft. Ex. instead of thinking about insecurities, if I share other people will also want to share ! 
• Consider the blockages - why aren't I able to share on the spot ? 

Boundaries 

• Pema Chodron - idiot compassion. Allowing boundaries to co-exist with our compassion.
• By having boundaries, you are showing someone that they can also have boundaries. 
• By having strong boundaries you elevate the relationship with yourself & the other person. 

Experience Design 

• The container & space needs to feel safe. You have to properly nurture it. 
• You're hosting people before the event.
• Provide structure but also allow space to open the gates to chaos.  

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Excited to share this first episode with the sparkly emotional explorer Cleo da Fonseca with you. We do a deep dive into emotions as a form of play and liberation. 

Cleo da Fonseca is a theater artist, educator and puppeteer who lives in Tiohtià:ke, also known as Montreal. She co-runs a theater company for young audiences called “Théâtre de la flamme” with Carolina Chmielewski; the focus of their productions are the “protagonism” of youth in each story. Cleo also works as a nature school educator with kids and teens where she finds deep connection with the natural world.

-EPISODE SUMMARY-

PRACTICES 

• Sing & act out the scenes from a musical or a song. Create a show out of it !  
• Forum theater, developed by Augosto Boal. People from the audience are invited to come on stage and take a role in the conflict. You then explore the best strategy for the people involved. Theatre gives the possibility of experiencing life in many different ways, both by being a witness & by being an active participant. 
• In conflict, experiment with breaking the rhythm - ex. switch from an intellectual focus, or integrate physicality to gain extra information that will influence how you arrive at a conclusion, through a better understanding of the emotion. 
• Enjoy the process of designing a game and its rules. Sometimes this process can be longer than the actual game !
• If someone doesn't want to connect with a high energy state, consider what your underlying need is and how you can meet that need. 

IDEAS

Emotions

• We often feel multiple things simultaneously. 
• There is great value experiencing the complexity of the emotions. 
• Emotions can be better understood through connecting them to metaphor & other concepts, regardless if they 'make sense'.
• Move beyond the so-called universal emotions. 
• Emotions are the motions of life. Emotions help the unknown be known. 
• The body transforms the feeling, and the feeling transforms the body. 
• Create a web of understanding instead of a categorized box. Just experience as it actually is. 
• Use emotion as a way to communicate and connect to other beings & invite other beings to experience that fullness. 
• When you are scared to experience your emotions: breathe, feel the air coming in. Be kind to yourself. 
• Keeping respect at the forefront. 
• Collective experiencing of a moment is very empowering. 
• There is a cultural component to being free to express intense emotions.  
• Learn how to simmer down, and actually meet people where they're at. 

When we tune into someone else, they will want to tune into us. There is a tendency towards balance and harmony. 

Relationships 

• Respecting someone's desire to not engage is a form of connection.
• Relationships remain even if you aren't in contact with them anymore, and the relationship continues to transform. 
• Developing an inner confidence that things transform, and that you don't need to control them. 
• Play to move through conflict while acknowledging that what is under the surface is deep. 

Experience design

• Inspiring locations create inspiring experiences. 

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.