What's better than an abusive hermit teaching you how to fight? Contributing to deforestation by kicking down trees!

Thick thighs make the cinema rise! This sweeping epic gets sand in all the right places, and The Rock serves looks.

Dave makes us watch a Scientology commercial for 2 hours, and John Travolta doesn't. even. dance. Is he the pigeon hat bandit?

Before he was Captain America, Chris Evans stars in the strange tale about sniffers, pushers, and screamers. I swear it's not as dirty as it sounds.

Can a young Jack Black save this film, or is Shitty Cinema doomed to stare into Jason Biggs lifeless eyes the whole time?

Michael Keaton goes from being an orphan (Batman) to making his son one in this jolly (?) Christmas classic. The gang also learns about Juice's porn search skills.

1.) Never have children, their consumerism will kill you around the holidays. 2.) Never shower with Phil Hartman in your home.

Bill Goldberg punishes everyone you ever wish you could at Christmas. Except for the rednecks. If zombies have taught us anything, it is rednecks are impervious.

Can Mike the Miz be a ho ho ho? Could there BE a more suggestive job title other than rear admiral? Find out this week!

Hulk Hogan goes from millionaire to love and care in this strange classic. Trigger warning: the Pizza Hut kid is in the film.