Single (not spiraling)

Does your life actually suck or are you just on social media too much? Because I think for a lot of women it's the second one and we don't even realize it's happening. In this episode I get into what comparing yourself to everyone online is actually costing you, why it keeps getting mistaken for self improvement, and how to figure out which parts of your life are actually yours versus things you absorbed from a screen.

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This week's episode is Single (not spiraling), I'm answering a question a listener wrote in with — she'd seen a lot of manosphere content come across her feed, found it useful at first, and then realized she was just scared of men and didn't know how to navigate dating anymore. We get into why that fear is valid and not something to fix or push past, what's shifting in the world right now, and how to actually build discernment when you're dating.

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If you've been feeling flat, uninspired, and like everything — even the things you used to love — has started to feel like a chore, this episode is for you. Lauren recorded this one burnt out, seven clients deep into her week, because sometimes the most honest thing you can do is talk about the thing you're actually in. This episode is a real conversation about what burnout is, what it feels like in your body, and why it hits differently when you spend your days holding space for other people. Lauren pulls from the introduction of Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle by Emily and Amelia Nagoski — including their definition of burnout, the concept that the system itself is rigged against women, and why people in helping roles tend to burn out faster and harder than most. Whether you're burnt out on dating, on work, on life, or all three at once — this one will make you feel a lot less alone in it.

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This week Lauren is just talking. No theme, no structure — she's sharing what's been on her mind lately: being tired of centering men in the conversation, and why increasing your pleasure as a single woman actually matters.

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You have started decentering men but something feels off. Weird. Like you are going against everything you were taught and even your own body is like — what are we doing. In this episode Lauren Samantha gets into exactly why decentering men feels so unnatural — and it has nothing to do with you being broken. We are talking patriarchy, misogyny, shame, capitalism, and what it actually looks like to start building a life that does not center men. If you are a single woman in your 30s and doing this work and wondering why it feels so hard — this one is for you.

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You understood everything we talked about in part one. And then you opened the apps and lost yourself in whether he texted back. That is exactly what this episode is about.We are getting into what decentering romance actually looks like when you are actively dating. The patterns you keep repeating even when you know better. The difference between wanting love from wholeness and wanting love to feel whole. And the question nobody told you to ask — not does he like me, but do you actually like him.Part two of a two part series. Go back and listen to part one first if you haven't.

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If you've been doing the work of decentering men but feel like something isn't clicking, this is the episode you need. Because the first step to decentering men is decentering romance — and most of us have never even questioned the story we were sold about what our lives are supposed to look like.In this episode we're getting into where the conditioning actually started, how fairy tales, rom-coms, and even our mothers shaped us into women who were taught to wait to be found instead of building a life. We're talking about the male gaze we internalized without knowing it, what we've been outsourcing to the idea of a relationship, and what it actually looks like to stop waiting and start living.This is not about giving up on love. This is about reclaiming your life.Single (Not Spiraling) is the podcast for women who are decentering men — one honest conversation at a time.

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What if your burnout isn't a personal failure — it's a system doing exactly what it was designed to do? In this episode, Lauren unpacks how patriarchy and capitalism condition women to over-function, under-rest, and tie their worth to productivity. She explores what a matriarchal value system would actually look like — not female domination, but a world where care, community, and emotional intelligence are treated as foundations, not afterthoughts.

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In your 30s, something shifts. You’ve done the therapy. You’ve built the self-worth. You’ve stopped settling for emotionally unavailable men. And now you find yourself in a strange in-between — loving your independence but still craving real partnership. In this episode, I’m talking about the tension of wanting love without losing yourself. The nervous system ease of being single. The fear of slipping back into old patterns. The grief that can come when something good disrupts the identity you built around doing life alone. And the cultural shift that’s made dating feel smaller, not because love isn’t real, but because your standards are higher. If you’ve ever felt stuck between protecting your peace and opening your heart, this conversation is for you.

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In this episode of Single, Not Spiraling, we’re talking about self-trust, standards, and what it actually means to stop settling for mediocre love. Decentering men isn’t about rejecting partnership — it’s about building enough internal safety that you’re no longer making decisions from anxiety, desperation, or fear of being alone. Self-trust is confidence, intuition, and believing your own thoughts, needs, and wants without immediately outsourcing them. It’s the steady feeling that even if a decision changes your life, you’ll be okay. We unpack how self-trust sharpens discernment in dating, how anxiety gets confused with intuition, and why raising your standards has less to do with attracting a man and more to do with not abandoning yourself. If you’re learning how to trust yourself, hold your standards, and choose partnership from alignment instead of panic, this episode will meet you exactly where you are.

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