Slop Quest

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Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! This week they talk about the unspoken show biz rule of writing in parts for boyfriends and girlfriends and how it destroys a script. Andy gets locked out on his porch twice in a row and might have to take shit in a bucket.  Ryan gets locked out of his bedroom in a psychic attack.  There’s so,e standing up for “squatter’s rights “ if you get what I mean and then O’Neill fantasizes about hiring someone off Craigslist to rip Andy off the toilet mid dump. They talk about Stainless steel toilet stock for Nancy Pelosi. Then O’Neill imagines a world where he works for the government by doing pranks on people. Then we get 5 star review that’s truly unbelievable. Then Andy watches the Chris Rock, O’Neill and Ari video and has some minor quibbles about it.

Full episodes and much more available on Patreon.com/SlopQuest

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! O’Neill & Andy remember the old Church of Latter Day Saints commercials. This leads them to speculate on the pros and cons polygamy and this leads to a few disagreements as well as a business idea for a “ball sauna” to help the husbands plow. Then Andy pitches an idea where people are knocked out for all their flights and shoved into tubes. The boys reminisce about how Andy behaved on Kratom. Then they talk about popping RFK jr’s  heart rate monitors on dogs to trick the government. Andy talks about a white lady in the audience crying while being empowered by a joke about doodies balls. They talk about using O’Neill’s 5’9 bit as a way of speaking truth to power. Then they talk about comedian angry freak outs. The boys also put their brilliant minds to use on how to handle the North Korea, South Korea problem and Ryan tries to convince Ari to ski there. The boys talk about how to be born into a wealthy family by cleaning streets in Heaven.

Full episodes and much much more available at Patreon.com/SlopQuest

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! Ryan laments the fact that garbage men don’t ride on the back of the truck. Then he takes issue with Andy’s Otterbox phone case that’s falling apart. Then they come up with a trick to get Andy on disability. Ryan’s wife tries to touch his antique globe and Andy roasts O’Neill’s novelty bobcat nutsack whiskey bottle. Then he has to prove to O’Neill that “cat pee” is an actual wine note. Andy pitches Ryan on being a Wartime Journalist. Andrew’s finger smells good but O’Neill won’t sniff it. And Andy finds a music video that’s too cringe even for O’Neill. They both have an extremely visceral reaction to it.

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Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! This week O’Neill tries to build Andy’s confidence at the top of the show. Then the boys talk about the FBI raising money by selling DVDs with cut scenes from the Epstein jail. Then Andy gets a bunch of facts wrong but finds out right away this time. O’Neill tries to wake up Andy with farts which derails the podcast. We have an update from ATC Aaron and Andy mistakes Wesley Willis for William Wallace. Then the boys talk about the toilet situation in Liberia. Then they talk about growing crops in beach doodie. Then talk about the EDM scene in Goa. Then Ryan watches the Hunter Biden interview and has some issues with his preparedness to run for president.  Then the boys talk about how ex presidents can completely white wash their crimes by pounding booze with people at bars. O’Neill gets mad that Andy hasn’t watched his “skits” on his website. Then Andy walks Ryan through the CIA Simple Sabotage Handbook and O’Neill loses his mind and realizes he could have been the world’s best CIA agent.

Full Episodes and more at patreon.com/Slopquest !!

Comedian Ryan O’Neill and Illustrator Andrew DeWitt bring you the dumbest takes on news, movies and ridiculous business ideas every week on Slop Quest! O’Neill finds out about the “Burbank Butt Sniffer” and is shocked when it turns out that it’s not Andrew. Then they pitch Nordstrom on a new ad campaign, “Nordstrom Sniff Out The Savings”! And to be honest, it really has legs. Then O’Neill can’t believe the backstory of the sniffer and it almost derails the entire show. Then they try to write a biography about the incident with one of the craziest book titles ever. The Andrew laments the fact that it’s sweltering while two unused air conditioners sit in the same room they’re recording in. This episode is really good and really stupid. Come get your slop!

Full Episode on Patreon.com/SlopQuest

Ryan tries to figure out what’s got the internet so pissed off about a blue jeans ad. Then the boys float the idea of a Sidney Sweeney presidency with random civics tests for American citizens with big rewards. The boys also talk about the Tea App massive leak. The boys then talk about how scary it is to talk to actual psychopaths. Then they talk about the disturbing phenomenon of ex-mafia YouTube. O’Neill sits beside a dude having a potentially viral meltdown on a plane. Then O’Neill tries out some new cool rhyme schemes and floats the idea of Dr. O’Neill Sings. Then the boys hand out African Warlord names and try to build a business as Brand Consultants for African Warlords through a new PR Company.

Full episodes and more available at Patreon.com/SlopQuest

Ryan’s brain is mush and Andy recounts a harrowing soup kitchen story where church ladies go nuts to some sweet ragtime jams. Then the boys try to rewrite the character of Oscar The Grouch in a more realistic manner. Ryan gets worried that his bad signing is a sign of a bad life and Andy tries to reassure him. Ryan and Ari play with a war hero’s medals and then use an old car to play Driving Miss Daisy then Andy tries to dissect what these ding dongs are getting out of this vacation role play. Andy recounts the joys of “Civil War Day” at his elementary school and the ridiculous outfits kids wore. O’Neill tries to understand the South’s obsession with the Confederacy. Then the boys dive into some Epstein talk and they talk about his aliens tricked humans into thinking gold was valuable.

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The boys get a five star review for their podcast but it’s just about Andy getting lead poisoning from his Stanley Thermos. This leads them to talk about the powers unleashed by getting slightly dumber every year. Ryan talks about penises as a sales tactic to get people to “pay the gay away” by joining Patreon. Then they talk about plastic army men being found in semen. Andy hits the Dollar Store for Yardley’s soap and gets roasted for it. Then they develop a soap for wieners only. Andy thinks the nation is stress eating dollar store candy. Then the boys talk about the Diddy trial and taking a rickshaw to the airport. Then there’s a little Bailey Jay/Buck Angle talk and O’Neill gets confused. Then they talk about the old Popular Science videos about which machines rip your dick off. Then O’Neill tries to pay Andy for voice over work with cookies. Then they reminisce about Paula Dean as O’Neill tries to remember what happened to her. Then they talk about delusional treasure hunters. Then Burt invents a “camping toilet” and hires Andy to draw his invention but Burt focuses too much on unimportant details.

Full Episodes available on Patreon.com/SlopQuest!

Ryan reveals how women are hanging out with nuns instead of wearing thongs at the beach. Andy finds out that E-Girls are pretending to be femboys in order to get more followers on Only Fans and when the secret gets out everyone rages. Then Ryan comes up with a new scam where he dresses as a nun to bang chicks. Then they come up with a pitch for Sister Act 3 based on this premise. Andy finds out that out that Russel Crowe is trying to kickstart a music career and the comments are amazing. This makes O’Neill lament the downward trajectory of Bruce Willis’ movie career. Then they pitch an idea for Ryan called “Cool Navy Seal”.  There’s some Bezos wedding talk then they create a Delta Premium Gooner’s Lounge. Andy goes to Medieval Times, enjoys the food but has a bone to pick with the show. The O’Neill creates some Wild West names for fans.

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Andy is finally right about some news as he breaks the Liver King arrest to O’Neill. A fan of Andrew’s art asks him to design a landslide. Ryan says disturbing things on a major podcast while hammered and fans reach out to Andy. Ryan gets a terrible lap dance. Andy talks about the creative powers of dreams and Ryan can actually sing Billy Joel. Hertz comes up with a new scam to fuck over customers. Then there’s some Tucker Carlson talk as well as National Eggs and Analingus Day. Then there’s another red pill deep dive that enrages O’Neill.