Somebody Save Me: The Official, but MOSTLY Unofficial, Smallville Podcast

The infamous 9th season has OFFICIALLY ended

The Two Nerdy Idiots continue the tradition of the end-of-season award show, with most of the same categories and some new ones. We give thanks and huge shout outs this week to our fans who continue to participate and make the show so fun. Also, Taylor decided to become a dictator this time around, but no worries because he can't pronounce "telepathy"!

As always, enjoy the show and LEAVE THOSE FIVE STARS!

Farewell General Zod, you were quite the idiot!

Clark now has the Book of Rao, but only to find out it will teleport every Kryptonian to their "paradise" world to start fresh. Since that includes Clark, he decides to lead his people to their new lives and has to say goodbye to his loved ones. Chloe gets pissed, Oliver doesn't care, and Lois gets told she needs to pick Africa over love. BUT, before Clark can do anything, Zod and his Kandorians begin committing gang violence across the globe because that's how you take over the world (apparently).

Britt Irvin, Michael Shanks and Alaina Huffman all return as DC Comics original characters Courtney Whitmore ("Stargirl"), Carter Hall ("Hawkman") and Dinah Lance ("Black Canary"), respectively.

Phil Morris and Lee Thompson Young make their final appearances as DC Comics original characters John Jones (“Martian Manhunter”) and Victor Stone (“Cyborg”), respectively.

As always, enjoy the show and LEAVE THOSE FIVE STARS!

Perry Pt. II: I'm Banging Clark's Mom

The farm gets a surprise visit from Martha Kent while Clark and Lois are figuring out their "break-up" and unemployment situation. On top of that, Martha brings Perry White and Lois couldn't be more excited to work with a legend on their hot new story: The Red Queen. Maxwell Lord returns and kidnaps Tess in order to track down the Book of Rao, which Chloe is also trying to find but is doing a terrible job.

Annette O'Toole (Virgin River, Superman III) makes her return as DC Comics original character Martha Kent.

Michael McKean (Better Call Saul, This is Spinal Tap) returns as DC Comics original character Perry White.

Gil Bellows (Chucky, The Shawshank Redemption) returns as DC Comics original character Maxwell Lord.

As always, enjoy the show and LEAVE THOSE FIVE STARS!

Smallville Presents: Lockdown, Pt. II

Chloe and Tess, a.k.a. the twins, get locked inside of Watchtower together (mmm, kinky). Stuart is back as a completely different character who now works for Checkmate. Zod continues to betray his own people by abandoning them. Clark tries to help a pregnant Faora, but Checkmate gets in the way. Oliver gets a sick new chest tattoo, courtesy of Zod.

Pam Grier (Jackie Brown, The L Word) makes her final appearance as DC Comics original character Amanda Waller.

As always, enjoy the show and LEAVE THOSE FIVE STARS!

Clark Kent v The Blur: Who does Lois love more?

Lois and Clark get their jobs pitted against one another by the Daily Planet's new editor-in-chief. Ex-D.A. Ray the NutSacks is out of prison and ready for his revenge on Lois and The Blur. Chloe, a.k.a. Watchtower, is practically useless nowadays. Lois basically admits that The Blur is more important than her boyfriend. Checkmate makes a return with their new black king and he is, in fact, NOT black.

Gil Bellows (Chucky, The Shawshank Redemption) makes his first appearance as DC Comics original character Maxwell Lord.

As always, enjoy the show and LEAVE THOSE FIVE STARS!

Metallo, Pt. II: Clark & Zod Forever <3

Thanks to Tess, John Corben is back and with a new upgrade: The Nice Guy Enhancer. Chloe tracks down Tess' lab for Clark, but little do they know that it's filled with red Kryptonite. Once Clark, or our favorite "Kal", is infected he falls in love with Zod because of his superpowers and takes him to the fortress to meet daddy. Meanwhile, Lois tries to get John out of the state and Chloe and Tess realize they are best friends/twins.

Brian Austin Green (Beverly Hills 90210) returns for his last special guest appearance as DC Comics original character John Corben, a.k.a. Metallo.

THIS IS THE WORST GAME OF CHESS ANYONE'S EVER SEEN!

Checkmate is back, with Amanda Waller, and guess who they want? CHLOE, a.k.a. Watchtower! Clark is apparently super selfish for not checking in with Chloe on his every move. Somehow Tess just now finds out that Oliver is Green Arrow. Detective John Jones is being sketchy. Checkmate kidnaps Chloe, so Clark has to break some legs. Oh, and no Lois? Chess sucks!

Phil Morris (Doom Patrol, Seinfeld) returns as DC Comics original character Martian Manhunter.

Pam Grier (Jackie Brown, Foxy Brown) returns as DC Comics original character Amanda Waller.

As always, enjoy the show and LEAVE THOSE FIVE STARS!

Couples Retreat: The Smallville Edition

The Nurse and her sister join us as special guest hosts for this romantic couples getaway!

Clark finds some time to plan a romantic weekend with Lois at the ever-so-famous McDougle Inn. Little do they know the most horrible couple, Chloe and Oliver, is also doing their own romantic getaway at the very same place. On top of that, the inn is haunted by the soul of Silver Banshee and is casually murdering men only (sexist, much?). Meanwhile, an even worse couple is having sexy time at Clark's barn. Their names? Tess and Zod, who we have now deemed as "Zess".

Odessa Rae appears in the episode as DC Comics original character Silver Banshee.

As always, enjoy the show and LEAVE THOSE FIVE STARS!

Dr. Beanie and His Bloody Limbs

The Kandorian's secret human experiments come back to bite them after a previous victim kidnaps the three who were in charge, and one happens to be the sister of Faora. Clark tries to help, but is too high to solve the crime all on his own. Who else can help, you ask? LOIS AND ZOD, OF COURSE (eww)! Meanwhile, Oliver figures out Chloe has been stealing money from him in order to create a mass array of kryptonite weaponry. Also, Zod has a sweet surprise at the end (it sucks).

Smallville Presents: Crimson, Pt. II and Zod's 9/11

It's Valentine's Day and Lois refuses to do anything romantic with Clark, but he isn't helping either. After a blast of fairy dust, a.k.a. PCP, laced with Gemstone Kryptonite, Clark now has the ability to "persuade" the people he talks to. Lois becomes a traditional housewife. Chloe somehow gets worse and is a psychotic C.K. bodyguard. Even Clark persuades himself to try and kill Tess after Zod tells him she killed the clone of Jor-El (#9.7)... or did she?