StepDad Success

The theme of our discussion today is discipline—a topic that is always on the agenda for stepdads. We’ll discuss how some discipline can be damaging and how you can take other approaches to impart important lessons without violence, aggression or anger.

Finally, we’ll talk about how it is possible to incorporate an element of fun while disciplining your kids.

POINT #1: Everyone Handles Discipline Differently

* Some people find discipline easy and seem to know exactly what works for their children, but others struggle to find an effective approach.

* Hitting and yelling can cause damage to children. It is possible to discipline without anger, aggression or violence.

* Often, how you discipline your kids depends on how you were disciplined by your parents.

POINT #2: You Can Introduce an Element of Fun into Discipline

* Discipline teaches lessons and provides consequences for things thThe six moves that make a stepkid choose you: www.stepdadsuccess.com

It's time go back to basics and recap the things you need to be doing each day to be the best stepdad you can be—and pass your legacy onto your kids. We’ll discuss the daily actions you need to take across The Four Bs (Body, Being, Balance and Business) to fulfill the Stepdad Success mission of Leaders Raising Leaders.

Finally, we’ll talk about the benefits of these daily actions and how they will change your life.

POINT #1: Reviewing What You Learned Can Keep You on Track

* Your legacy is to pass the best to your kids, but you can’t do that if you aren’t at your best.

* Podcasts 1-7 discuss the foundational elements of Stepdad Success and living The Warriors Way.

* Reviewing podcasts 1-7 from time to time can help you stay on track.

POINT #2: Daily Actions Make the Difference

* Daily actions across each of the Core 4 areas (Body, Being, Balance and Business) can help you to achieveThe six moves that make a stepkid choose you: www.stepdadsuccess.com

Exton Male, a stepdad of one and father of three from the United Kingdom, will discuss how the sudden death of his first wife impacted his two oldest children—and how he and his children came through the tragedy together. He’ll discuss his role as a stepdad and how his third biological child with his current wife has cemented family relationships.

Finally, Exton will talk about how he let go of guilt so he could heal and create a strong blended family.

POINT #1: Your Kids Need Your Leadership During Tough Times

* After losing his first wife to a blood infection called sepsis, Exton knew it would be hard to keep his life—and his children’s lives—on track.

* Exton immediately realized that he needed to do the right thing for his two kids and sought advice from counselors on how to help his children grieve.

* By dedicating himself to helping his children get through this tragedy, he found that his kids were the onesThe six moves that make a stepkid choose you: www.stepdadsuccess.com

Today, we’ll talk about the importance of challenging why you are doing things and assessing your level of commitment. We’ll discuss how looking at the feelings, facts, focus and “fruit” around each challenge that you face can help you to overcome it.

Finally, we’ll talk about the benefits of saying “yes” and how to get support from others in your life as you overcome your challenges.

POINT #1: When Dealing with Challenges, Ask “Why?”

* When challenges come your way, it’s important to ask yourself why you are doing things and assess your level of commitment.

* The size of your challenge doesn’t matter; rather, it’s the consideration and thought you put into the “why.”

* You should also ask yourself questions to determine the facts, feelings, focus and “fruit” (results or benefits) of each challenge.

POINT #2: You Can Have It All

* Although it may be tempting to give a simple answerThe six moves that make a stepkid choose you: www.stepdadsuccess.com

Today, we’ll talk about what really drives and motivates you. We’ll discuss how looking at the four Fs (Feelings, Facts, Focus and “Fruit”) around each of your goals can help to increase your motivation and drive.

Finally, we’ll talk about how looking at the four Fs can help you to achieve your goals regularly, quickly and powerfully.

POINT #1: Assess the Facts

* When you have a target, it’s important to get clear on the facts of your current situation.

* For example, if you want to take a surf trip, you may need to improve your surfing skills and physical fitness to fully enjoy yourself.

POINT #2: Let Your Feelings Out

* Your feelings are the desires you have around reaching your target.

* Expressing your feelings will help to motivate you and drive you to action.

POINT #3: Focus Will Lead to “Fruit”

* Your focus is your target, such as a surf trip.www.stepdadsuccess.com

Today, we’ll talk about the importance of doing little things to show gratitude for the people in your life. We’ll discuss how easy it is to lose sight of the little things when pursuing big goals and how little daily actions can help you pass gratitude to your kids.

Finally, we’ll talk about the benefits of practicing gratitude on a regular basis.

POINT #1: Teach Gratitude to Your Children

* Gratitude is a gift that you can give to your children.

* Leading kids to be grateful involves doing little things consistently.

* Create a gratitude ritual for your household, such as writing notes, recording happy memories or sharing at the dinner table.

POINT #2: Little Things Matter

* Simple gestures are all it takes to show gratitude to your loved ones.

* Daily actions involving gratitude make a huge impression on children.

* Resist the temptation to forget about teachingThe six moves that make a stepkid choose you: www.stepdadsuccess.com

Today, we’ll talk about the importance of saying “yes” to yourself and how it can empower you. We’ll discuss how saying “no” to yourself can cause you to live from a place of scarcity.

Finally, we’ll talk about how asking the right questions can lead you to “yes.”

POINT #1: Saying “Yes” Is About Leadership

* Saying “yes” to yourself isn’t about being selfish or greedy; it’s about empowering yourself and living a life of abundance.

* Saying “yes” to yourself is about teaching your children how to create the life that they want.

* Saying “no” is a lie that we train ourselves and train our kids into.

POINT #2: Saying “No” Shrinks You

* Saying “no” causes us to live from a place of scarcity and not enjoy experiences fully.

* If you are saying “no” across a few areas of your life, you should ask yourself different questions so you can begin saying “yes.”

* For example,The six moves that make a stepkid choose you: www.stepdadsuccess.com

Matt Roth, a stepdad of two from Rochester, New York, will discuss how he adjusted to becoming a stepfather and developed a mutually beneficial relationship with his stepkids. He’ll discuss how his own experiences growing up with a stepdad influenced how he interacts with his stepkids.

Finally, Matt will share his philosophy on molding his kids by providing the guidance, love and support they need.

POINT #1: Your Background Can Influence Your Behavior

* Matt was raised by his mom and his stepfather and had a difficult upbringing; his biological father was not around during his childhood.

* Matt said he often felt like an outcast growing up and got into trouble as a result.

* He said his early life experiences “gave him a template for what NOT to do” with his own children.

* Matt is very careful not to introduce emotions such as fear and guilt into his children’s lives.

POINT #2: Structure aThe six moves that make a stepkid choose you: www.stepdadsuccess.com

Today, we’ll talk about the benefits of including other people in your target-setting. We’ll look at how living The Warriors Way benefits you and your partner, and how measuring the little things can help you keep track of how you are doing across all areas of your life.

Finally, we’ll discuss how targets can help to keep you focused—and why hitting your targets can be fun.

POINT #1: Your Partner Will Notice Your Efforts

* As you begin to adopt The Warriors Way, your partner will notice positive changes in you.

* Living The Warriors Way will cause a positive shift in your relationship with your partner.

* Your partner may begin to live The Warriors Way, too.

POINT #2: Targets Can Be a Team Effort

* As your partner observes you living The Warriors Way, she may begin setting her own targets or helping you to achieve yours.

* Involving your partner in setting targets can be poThe six moves that make a stepkid choose you: www.stepdadsuccess.com

Today, we’ll talk about the importance of focus. We’ll look at why it’s easy to lose focus and why vague goals prevent you from being successful.

Finally, we’ll discuss how creating targets can help you get back on track and define the important characteristics of a target.

POINT #1: Focus is a Key Component of Growth

* Whether you are working on personal or business growth, you need to have focus.

* When you lose focus, it means that you lose clarity on what you are working toward.

* To regain your focus, you need to ask yourself “why” questions (Why are you are doing what you’re doing? Why do you want what you want?).

POINT #2: Targets are Different Than Goals

* Goals often are vague and unclear (for example, “I want to make more money.”).

* Targets are specific, measurable and have a deadline (for example, “I want to make $106,000 by the end of the year.”).

* ByThe six moves that make a stepkid choose you: www.stepdadsuccess.com