Jason has never prepared a meal in his life and it shows! Meanwhile, Jason's wife is getting targeted ads for saucy products and he'd like to know why. Also, Steve's Letterboxd is basically just Mr. Skin 2.0, so don't ask him to share it with you. And finally, Jason will turn on anything that produces sound to avoid having to hear anyone (including himself) chew food. They're a couple of cool dudes, huh?

Steve treats automated car doors like the enabling blight on society that they obviously are and notices that kids must not have the respect and reverence for vehicles ferrying them to and fro and so they slam car doors like a cobra is on the inside. Jason's son does nothing half-assed, meaning that even light play on a tablet involves his whole ass being up in the air. Finally, the guys describe their favorite mid-life tantrums.

Steve makes very specific Ferngully references when talking about the paradise grotto he encountered in Hawaii. Meanwhile, Jason turned over the vacation planning to his family and now he's going to the beach over Wrestlemania weekend. Did you know that when you have a Fear Of Missing Out On Nothing (FOMOON), you're living life wrong? And finally, seriously, tell your friends that your home is now operating on sitcom rules and sit back while your life gets infinitely better.

Jason's dad tried to help fend off a tick attack by burning it from a... private place and Steve thinks he actually made it worse. Steve's bud freaked out about nothing until it turned into something and Steve once confused humans with lizards and cost a young man a healthy chunk of flesh. Burrow in and stay a while!

Jason's "friends" got the shaving cream in the face at a sleepover gag wrong and his eyesight has never been the same since. Steve and his buds watched enough Friday the 13th films to convince themselves a three-legged dog was a bad omen. And finally, did your sleepover include at least one wiener kid? If not, is it possible that YOU were the wiener kid?

Steve wants more detail out of the album covers his daughter is drawing all over the outside of their house but Jason thinks she should consider her medium of choice first. Jason carried childhood trauma from striking out at the plate all the time into adulthood and it's way worse then. Finally, if time travel were invented, Jason would use it to go back in time and make himself better at sports by... harassing his younger self? The plan needs work.

Steve went to the Home Depot needing to take care of some business, but found himself needing to take care of some BUSINESS. It was there that he determined Job (of the Bible) dealt with some terrible things, sure, but nothing like what that poor public toilet had to witness. Also, it seems like the only time Jason can time travel is when his family is waiting for him to get out of the bathroom. No report was filed or was necessary.

Podcast Update: Jason found out he's not a party POOPER, he's a party DOER! And whoops, sorry to say, but he's also a clean freak and will probably ruin any party you let him host... or maybe save it? Finally, Steve wishes ghosts left more evidence but he also loves the thrill of the chase.

Steve ate bugs for money as a youth, but you couldn't pay him ENOUGH to eat these weird-tasting, ruined insects that are crawling around today! And Jason missed out on eating bugs completely and thus, the outrage that would apparently accompany the weird flavor they now possess. He does, however, convince Steve that Rick Moranis could be the key to figuring this whole thing out and they workshop the next Honey I Shrunk movie together.

People ruin Jason's good time when they dare to come to his house after being invited to come to his house. Also, saying "bros before hos" in 2024 feels like the kind of thing you say to get cancelled. Finally, we all know that dudes aren't your muchachos until you've bro-ed out together.