Table Rush Talk Show

When I read the notes of this episode it all seems very serious.  Let me just tell you that I was laughing my ass off the whole way through edit.  I don’t know what it was but I’m funny in this one!  Or so I think anyway.  Bottom line, all of the searching and searching on the social media for speakers brings out the cynical dry side of me.  It all starts with the micro-dosing…

Episode notes: 

How mind numbing is the speaker research for the summit!  I have been in the gopher hole.  

The psychedelic people.  Michael Pollan.  Why do the millionaires and billionaires care about the psychedelics?  Do they just want to get high?  I’m in a recovering addict from back in the day so I prejudge.  I question their motives.  However I do clearly see who the micro-dosing and the research and all that is effect for peoples psychology.

Now since I am in recovery and I practiced with “mega dosing” in my teen years…  I already cashed in my ticket on that.  Risk reward wise as well…  My life is so good and rich any illusory better-ness it may provide me…   Not worth the risk.

I do look forward to interviewing a person or two who are specialists in that and to set aside my prejudices…  

I am slowly but surely gaining ground on the speakers.  

…the nightly journaling for whatever reason, if i’m tired, sometimes falls by the wayside.  I’ll just go through it in my mind when I go to bed.  Yeah right, I just fall asleep.

“Looking up people to speak is mind numbing”.  “More douchebagery”.  There is so much silly content out there.

And all the success people.  Gosh…  Good for the success people and all the people who follow them.  …I think who I can be here to help are the recovering success people.  Both the success speakers themselves as well as those looking for what the success people provide.

THere’s all these prizes out there, all this stuff out there.  All this stuff to entice people to follow like subscribe.  win this win that.  Is that what it’s come down too…  It’s probably what I’m going to be doing in two years.

Now and then you come across a nugget…  Let’s not put the card before the horse.  

…the people spending hours in the gym.  There’s lots of work out people; God bless too… “The physically fit crew.”   It’s like 1/3 of instagram and facebook.  It’s like 1/3 success people,  1/3 physically fit people.  But a lot of people spending a lot of times in gyms and stuff.  They must be suffering durning the covid.  Man there’s lots of outside out there.  God bless, I did my gym time in my day.  

The endless procession of chicks showing their bodies.  In the posses, in the standing, in the butts out, in the legs crossed, in the pouty lips…  and the millions and millions of followers.

It can be disheartening.  GODS BEAUTIFUL CREATION is depressing me LOL.  I find the research mind numbing.  Some people love it!  

Turning the Matthew Cox interview into four parts was a good thing.  It gave me a nice break.  I got to work up a months worth of interviews.  I do love the interviewing.  Which gives me hope because that part of the summit is coming.

…in the meantime I get to see al lot of “Gods beautiful creation”.

Coach asks what do you need from me…  Tell me handsome, tell me I smart, tell me I’m doing the right things…  Tell me anything!!!

What a magical day!  The Greg Beckett interview re-inspires me.

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After I real off a few surf spot names as I’m walking along the beach, I cover three main topics: A Prayer, I’ve been asked to review a book, and the Kriya yoga crew take their meditation very seriously…

Episode notes:

I’m walking along the Pacific ocean…  The surf spots are Pipes, Turtles, Tippers, just north of the Cardiff Reef.  Can you hear the ocean in the back ground?  The Motive app gives me a refresh and sorting through the new button placement sucks :).  

Three main things I want to touch on.

1. A prayer, god help me see everyone I meet today with present eyes.
2. I’ve been asked to review a book so that’s super fun.
3. The Kriya yoga crew take their meditation very seriously.

First the prayer.  I was gonna cook Waylons favorite meal and it turns out it fell on Easter.  So he gets me on the phone with the mother, Dawn :).  Somehow I just didn’t try to prove any points, get leverage, anything, as the prayers going through my head I say to her “I’ve got plenty of food, come on over, let’s have dinner”.   And just like that all was good.  I got to see her a fresh faced friend coming over for dinner :).

I got asked to review a book.  And I just think that is so freaking awesome!  OMG, someone thought of me to do that.  And I’m honored.  (And it is a little ego gratifying).

The Kriya yoga crew is very disciplined.  Sadh Guru may practice the Kriya yoga.  I’m all relaxed about how I meditate…  And I came across this Kriya practitioner who was like, if you don’t meditate right you will not have the transcendent experience.  

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I’m very reflective in the moment.  (Briefly I wonder, youtube v podcast? Youtube v podcast?)  I’ve clearly broken through to the next parts of the summit project which is a relief and feels amazing.  And thank goodness because I got tired of rehashing the same old problem and hearing myself talk about it.  Also looking forward in anticipation of the next round of challenges.  

Episode notes:

…I’m honestly a little bummed I didn’t start on the YouTube.  My initial inclination was to start with YouTube cause I’m relatively fearless when it comes to looking at the camera.  I pivoted to podcasting however.  Due to thought of audience location.  Now I’m wondering if that was smart or not… call it a moment of regret.  No, stay with the podcast, stick with it!  The day will come when my content will get to hit the YouTube, so look at the camera.  

The real purpose of this episode is…  What you listen to now was recorded 3 weeks ago.  Three weeks later I slap on intro n outro then I publish it to the podcast platform.  Why that’s important is I get to listen to the episode 3 or 4 weeks later and see what my mindset was.  I get to see the progression.  Was I having a hard time.  Am I still having the same problem.  

The wound vs the scar.  Am I just rehashing the wound?  

I’m finally through that rough part of the summit and get to see it!  I’m not still having the same problem and I am gaining ground :).  Thank god.

Listening to old episodes for editing to publish them, is one of my favorite things right now, and almost always makes me smile.

It can feel like slow progress, and it is, but it feels good right now.

It is all good. I’m going at the speed I need to go and there’s no hurry.

What if I didn’t care if it took an extra month?

There is going to be new challenges ahead as I’ve broken through the current lump.

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I’m having very much fun all of a sudden searching for influencers, speakers, subject matter experts on the social media…  As I’m learning how to navigate it and I am starting to see the trends.  But it can also feel sad on a moment here or their as I see how “far behind” I am…  But hey I’m learning my creative process!

Episode notes:

If I am going to repurpose these recordings and put blurbs on the social media…  If I’m consuming the content it distracts me, I start coveting likes and things like that.  Back to the point, I need to be staring at the camera more.  Must increase the engagement factor.

As I’ve been researching my speakers in earnest…  There is a lot more interaction is happening on instagram v facebook.  Not a lot of people are doing a lot of Facebook video.  There is a lot of opportunity to be doing video on the FB and the IG…  Something I want to grow to.  Opportunities for engagement there that I think I will be good at.

I see that I am so starting very much from scratch in the social media regard…  I.e. who “they” are and how to navigate the platforms to find them.  I searched my first hashtags, with some success today.  Some people are good at platform specific content…  I found one who was off the FaceBook altogether.  How are people using the facebook?  From a marketing perspective it seems the groups are where FB is extremely strong.

I’m being honest and vulnerable in saying that it can weigh me down, when others are so far ahead on the social media…  The big takeaway for me is to learn to love, be happy for, be supportive of other people and their success on the social media.  It is something I get to do and work on.  Can I learn to talk the gratification as lightly as the woe is me I’ve got so far to go.  

Learning my creative process is fun right now :).  I need a different thing pulling me forward than competition right now.  It doesn’t work for me anymore.

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I hadn’t been pressuring my brother to listen to my podcast…  Nick went ahead and listed to the “Why cowboys where bandanas” episode.  And he liked it!  I’ve also heard recently that I have a radio voice…  and someone else had said they liked it.  So three nuggets of fun :).  But now I have a positive feedback hangover lol.  

“The Tools For a Good Life Summit” is the name that sticks!  So you want to skip your midlife crisis?  Or make it through the one you’re in?  I finally was having fun researching people…   The summit was not felling fun for a bit.   I’ve been researching on the esoteric side to start.  If you look at who people you are following you kind find all sorts of good prospects.   You can find good people on the youtube channels list.  And interaction with their audience.  Oh, and I love astrology.  

It’s so interesting how influencers/people just drop off and disappear.   Do they go to treatment, get divorced?  

She’s probably not going to be speaking to my core audience…

And I was happy for this new kid who joined the 2CCX…  So my competitive side was tempered for a bit.  And that felt good.

…just write the names down.  Quit thinking so much, just write them down.

I was pinging from “this is so much fun” and the “pit of despair.”

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Krystal Kelly trains horses internationally.  And when your favorite place is the middle east that means you're dodging bullets, entering car rallies across the Mongolian tundra, and just basically living life to the fullest.  Krystal Kelly has done more by the time she’s 31 than your whole family has done in a lifetime.  And the most beautiful thing…  It’s all done with love.  You will learn something of humanity.  (Let me just say that the stories get wilder and wilder and more and more poignant throughout the whole conversation.)

You can catch all of Krystals adventures here:  

• https://equestrianadventuresses.com/
• Equestrian Adventuresses (YouTube) https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTwquRYNy\_gOoxZJDkglZqw
• International Equestrian (YouTube) https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC7D77cYlZtdvlfgd52Wib3A
• https://krystal-kelly.com/
• Books n such: https://equestrianadventuresses.com/horse-travel-books-and-films

Episode notes:

I catch her in Germany, during the Covid, where there is a lockdown, and where she is trapped with her horses.  And what do you do with your horses when you're trapped in a foreign country?  You knock on doors till you find someone who will let you use their yard!

And that’s how they got across Ireland.  Riding everyday and knocking on people’s doors, those with a field that is, and see if you can spend the night!

From her current window she can see “The Wall”…  The Berlin wall.  Where she is trapped during the covid.  She is isolated in isolation in an old communist village, with her two horses.

Questions:

How do you eat when you’re trekking across Ireland on a horses?

Where do you stay?

How does it work?  When you’re carrying everything you have in saddle bags?

You’ve got to hear how this works!

…She left America about 10 years ago.

They finish their trek across Ireland in November 2020.  Park their horses in stables with an ocean view.  Then in feb pandemic hits…  as the horses are in transport, they make it to Germany and the boarders closed!  The horses (and her) are trapped in Germany.

How does she pay for this?  She is a professional horse trainer and coach and she travels the world developing riding clubs, giving lessons, clinics, and things like that.

In Ireland as she was riding around she would give lessons along the way.

And she has https://equestrianadventuresses.com/ which is for women love horses, travel and adventure.  They filmed their Ireland adventure and it is now on Amazon Prime.

Her and I meet in the 2CCX and she is a key cog to the naming of “Bitch Slap …the accelerated path to peace” podcast…  

It turns out she’s traveled all over the world…  Her personal goal is to visit every country in the world.  So far it’s “only “60” out of 193.  She lived in Egypt for 2 years, India for 2 years.  Living there starting from 22yrs old.  

Iraq for a week.  Yemen for a week.  Yemen when the boarders weren’t open for tourists.  She loves the Arabic countries.   There are questions that she has that she wants answers to.

She’s seen the things that you haven’t seen on the news…  She’s lived in, been locked down in, and trapped in middle eastern countries where it is not a good place to be a white women.  

in 2011…  In Egypt, they are protesting and rioting, and the police are on stand down.  Looting.      Kids with guns directing traffic.  At this point she’s been to so many countries as a solo blond girl…  But the local’s will protect you.  There are kind people everywhere.  

The first thing she does is asks the taxi driver “what are the local scams that I need to know about?”  And they like to tell her and befriend her.

What’s the heaviest situation where the auntie comes to your rescue?  Yemen definitely was one of those intense places because it was at war…  quite a few scary things happened there.  In India every single day was a battle for me in India.  

Things that I tried that kept me safe in the Middle East did not work in India.  …Men tried to attack me.  I’m not in a touristy place in India, working on a big project.  The word spread like wild fire that there was a white women there…  50 Indian men were searching for me and they were intent on finding me.  I could see it in there eyes and I knew exactly what they were there for.  All the local men who were working with her gathered arms and protected her.  

Those aunties serving you tea in the cafes…  She will chase the men away for you.  She had to learn to allow her self to be helped by others.  Set my ego aside “they know better than me”.  

How about a scary safety wise issue?  …so in Cambodia…  There’s the skooty bike scam.  

And then the real danger is Yemen.  I speak Egyptian Arabic…  and when I decide to go to Yemen mom comes along.  I needed a “fixer” to get across the boarder…  You cannot be found out that you are American.  There is 50 - 60 military checkpoints as we drive across 400 miles.  “You cannot be found out.”  “I am trusting my life with this man that I have just known for like 12 seconds.”  LIke the Indiana Jones Fixer.  

In Yemen we couldn’t really leave the vehicle…  and the one of the men they are interacting with knows where the “terrorists are”.  Al Qaeda and Isis.  It was definitely very scary.  We had gone through a checkpoint…  the fixer had arranged that we should change vehicles every couple of hours so the terrorists wouldn’t find us.   Trucks and guns, and AK 47’s and the big guns.  “…all of the sudden we hear machine gun fire”.  And we are in this “bowl” this canyon.  And it is loud.  “Just act normal, we are a family having lunch.”  She tells the fixer “I want the truth, what happened at that checkpoint…”   “It was attached by terrorists, and several people were killed…”  His family is there every single day.  They live there.  “This is their normal”.  

Why were you there?  “I wanted to have questions answered…” because I do live the middle east.  When 9/11 happened my dad was deployed, and my brother was deployed, and my whole family has been deployed…   “Unfortunately, we have this negative view of Muslims and Islam and all this stuff…” For my self I wanted to know about the religion and about the culture.  “Why are Americans there dropping bombs?  I need to know.”  I don’t know why I’m so fascinated by the Arabic culture.  Every time I’m there I find the answers I’m looking for…

I as able to send the fixers daughter to college.  If I hadn’t gone she wouldn’t have been able to go to college.  “I can’t help everyone but maybe I helped her, I helped this family…  at least”.  Sometimes you can’t really help.  “…But sometimes just listening.”  I feel like somehow “It was healing for them to share.”  

My questions and level of understanding has evolved.  Example she fasted for Ramadan.  I want to know about the people who are living there.

I went to Vietnam and the museum is called the “American War Museum”.  It’s so crazy…  I’m 20 some years old (when I was there) and Never did it occur to me there side of the story…  “Why did I not learn this when I was growing up”.  I want to hear the peoples life story, “What was it life for you…  while I was at WallMart… bitching about a FaceBook post”.  It’s a very humbling experience.

It’s bringing you this connectedness yes?  “Yes”.  She’s got no agenda to promote, it is just providing her peace for herself.  There are members of my own family I won’t share this too.  The would judge.  “It’s a heavy burden to carry, to see some of the things and to not be able to help.”  I cannot help everyone I mean I’ve been homeless for the last two years.  

So it shifted to I’ve got to start helping myself.

Do you consider yourself a spiritual person?  Yes.  I like to learn about all the religions in an intelligent way.  She wants to learn these things real time.

How do you meet the husband…  Is he along for the ride or?  I met him in Azerbaijan…  There was this car rally I had to do.  I did it solo, which has not been done before.  In a hot pink car…  Driving through all the “stans” Tajikistan, Kyrgyzstan, Uzbekistan.  The more east I go the more game face I become.  I’m going through police crossings, boarder checks, in a hot pink car…

I’m sleeping in my car at the port for cargo ships for 5 days…  no place to go to the bathroom lol.  My husband pulls up and beelines for me all smily faces and sunshine, “Hey is there a ferryboat?”.  “He was chasing me for like 20 countries”.  But he didn’t give up…  (Mischa is thinking here.  OMG the story just gets better!!!  It dosen’t stop.)  “He had done something sweet for me while I was in Mongolia.”

Good news “You’ve got to be in Greece for two weeks”.  Then to Belgium…  where it’s a 6 hour drive for Christian (her husband) who surprises her…  It’s a very sweet story :).

Born and Bread California?  Yes, I left (California) when I was 16 to go to Horsey school in Oklahoma.  My first international job in Belgium when I was 21.

I wanted to be a top rider in the Olympics…  I picked stalls to help pay for lessons.  I knew since I was very little that I would work with horses.  I’ve worked with horses since I was 15 yrs old.  

Family, cousins, uncles, everyone was military…  She was the loan wolf.  She may have had a broader richer experience then she would have if she had joined the military?  Yes.  

You can not know me and not Egyptian food and see Egypt.  

Clearly your families military experience groomed you for your travels.  Yes, I grew up in that environment and learn these things.  I’m very observant and aware.  It’s defiantly helped me stay out of danger a few times.  Because I was aware and mindful I got out of there.  I got of there safe.  

“My Halloweens were probably a bit more careful.”  As a kid you don’t really know but you pick up on some things.  As I kid I was learning how to get out of a choke hold.  ‘Daaad, when is this gonna happen?”

You’d be surprised what people tell you if they’re asked.

My brother and I are a little different.  “Perhaps he’s been brainwashed by the military.”

“You don’t have to do what I do, but there’s so many people in America that you could connect with and meet just because you’ve heard of their country or you know how to say hello in their language”.

(Mischa’s thought) …the awareness of how diverse America is and the illusion that it’s not.

Now you’re trapped in Germany in the eastern wall…  She’s only 31 and just getting started.  

They can find me on youtube. and books ect.  She taps into the humanity.  Every time I watch one of her videos I cry.  

Start podcasting!  Get the Shure MV88 mobile mic, you can literally take it anywhere on the fly https://amzn.to/2Mnba3Q

Access my “Insiders Guide to Finding Peace” here: https://belove.media/peace    

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Part two is awesome!  I bring it home!  All the great thought content that came out of a morning of mediation, ACIM, a zoom mtg, and walking on the beach.  So glad I did not heed the call of the shiny objects that were beckoning to me and that I “Hit Record And Let It Rip”.  

Episode notes:

I was in a great thoughtful space from the morning routine.

ACIM what came across… “You who have tried so hard and are still trying to fit the better picture into the wrong frame and so combine what cannot be combined…”.

So call it the ego picture and the god source picture/the infinite picture.  It’s a choice.  And very often I chose ego and I’m gonna chase the shiny object…  Success, the likes, the money, the girl, whatever.  And it can be subtle or big.  Not that any of that’s bad…  It’s my mental perception of whats happening around me.  

The Infiinite, the God Picture.  The Now.  When you get that glimpse of the now and everything is perfect the way it is supposed to be.  

You’ve got the picture of the ego sounded by the frame of the shiny object.  And the ego is the picture.  The egoic mind f**k.  The illusion that is in the shiny frame.

The god picture with the light beautiful frame around it.  I just like the work god, it’s easy it’s clean.  Most of the dogma has been striped away from it.

Trying to have a little of each lol.  Get off the high horse Meesh.  I want the illusion of financial success to fit in the box.  

I’ve given over the need for the special relationship that fills the God sized hole.  Now I get to give over the need for the “special relationship” with money.  “Imagine not caring about money”.  Is it my circumstances?  You can ruminate about that I don’t need to.  

How often have I tried to manipulate the universe into giving me what I want by trying to let go…?  “What if this is my last moment of intimacy at this level, with anybody?”  Since that moment I have been free.  

A trigger: Somebody will introduce me to somebody and I’m like “Is this the one?”

…Now if I could just get there with money.  How about not caring?  Imagine new levels of not caring about finances, success, where things are going.  Imagine being free of money.  There are people out there who are truly not obsessed with financial circumstances.  How cool is that?

…Playing tag in a Zoom mtg.  Of course I love to be picked because I love to pontificate!  Caring if you're picked or not picked.  Wanting to drop insights.  How can I be of service.  The need to want to have that moment of recognition…  That’s a beautiful opportunity to go to god. New levels of awareness.  Every moment is an opportunity.  Sometimes quickly sometimes slowly.  

Start podcasting!  Get the Shure MV88 mobile mic, you can literally take it anywhere on the fly https://amzn.to/2Mnba3Q

Access my “Insiders Guide to Finding Peace” here: https://belove.media/peace    

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Email me: [email protected]   

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I have the awareness that when I am in an awesome juicy thought stream out of meditation, thoughtful literature, walking.  So my inspiration is cranking away…  That can be the great time to record.  As soon as I get distracted by the other “stuff” it fritters away.  In that vein today I just hit record!

Episode notes:

This episode falls under the heading of let it rip.  Sometimes you’ve just got to hit record and let it rip.

I’ve tried to have more cohesive thoughts of late…  But I’m just going for it this morning.  A little description of the house.  The sounds.  Sometimes it’s easy to stay on the breath.  The morning routine. 4 or 5 pages of A Course In Miracles which is like “What an order!”.  Group therapy can be powerful. 

The real point.  As soon as I get home RECORD!  Don’t look at the phone, don’t look at all the distractions.  As soon as I jump on a distracted train my cool thoughts go back to the ether. 

At the end of everyday maybe I should have all browsers closed.  All documents closed.  All files closed.  So I can start the day a fresh…

Two thought streams from A Course In Miracles this morning…  “…you who are still trying to fit the better picture into the wrong frame…”  But I’ll save this thought for part two!

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Mischa’s Stuff
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Better enjoy taking your kids to the dentist while you can, cause it’s fleeting.  The divorced dads 6 step process to having a great relationship with your tween - teen!

Episode notes:

Turns out I can put all of my hair in a ponytail and I got my first man bun comment from somebody... the dentist!  Better enjoy taking your kids to the dentist while you can, cause it’s fleeting.  The divorced dads 6 step process to having a great relationship with your tween - teen!

1. Talk to them about what you are thinking.
2. Make the common space our space.
3. Include them in your decision process.
4. Ask yourself - Do I poo poo their idea’s?  How am I not supportive of my kids or their ideas?
5. Say this Prayer - “How can I be more supportive of (my kids names) setting aside my own selfish wants and desires.
6. Treat them with the respect that you demand from them.

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Outtakes from todays “He was not having any of my Imposter Syndrome!” episode. Plus some new shenanigans and today’s temporary summit name!

Episode notes:

I def have momentum with putting speakers on and off of the summit.  Todays name of the summit is “Kick-Ass life tools summit!”.  I’m getting some good names on the invite list.  I have’t start invited em yet…  Oh yeah, f’ing google email just took me down.  I don’t even know how to use gmail and I’m trying to interact with influencers that have 1000’s and 1000’s of followers and creating things and doing all this stuff…  and I can’t even manage google email what the hell am I doing?

I’m trying to be cognizant of time.  If I have shorter podcast episodes perhaps I’ll have more time to work on the summit?  My hair is gigantic!

Take 2…  That gets shut down!

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Access my “Insiders Guide to Finding Peace” here: https://belove.media/peace    

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