Talk Candid To Me

Things go wrong in life. We are in constant conversation looking for feedback in our choices, thoughts, and feelings. When you have lived a life full of pain, any little moment of something going wrong feels like a mistake. This is where the belief pops up in our mind that: "it just not be meant to be."

Life will always have obstacles that you will need to overcome. Healthy minds understand that obstacles are just obstacles and don't define our destiny. When you have a past full of unhealed pain or trauma, the perceptions are going to be skewed and the truth of the situation will be harder to see. In pain, we often look for excuses, and our beliefs come forward to bring relief to our experience. This is why we say: Relief is not the definition of happiness. Relief is relief.

Read more on the blog:

https://traciandkayla.com/when-things-go-wrong-it-isnt-the-universe-telling-you-no/

The tendency in many of is to want change in every area of our life at the same time. Typically the more overwhelmed you are, the more you try to over compensate and accomplish more at once in order to "make up" for lost time.

We all want the results of change immediately, which leads to feeling overwhelmed. Don't look at the things you want, but rather look at the choices you have made. Take a look at the 3 biggest choices you have made in 2019. Now look at the results of those choices. Think about the consequences of those choices stepping into this new year. There can be both positive and negative consequences of our actions. Typically your choices have a theme. Your desires won't but your choices will.

Read more on the blog:

https://traciandkayla.com/where-to-start-when-you-feel-overwhelmed/

Why do we start and stop all of the time?

If you have unhealed trauma or are triggered in your past painful experienced, you actually have two versions of yourself.

1. Current self: Desires results and change (I would like to lose weight, pay off debt, start dating again)
2. Wounded self: Looking to always protect (goes into isolation, self sabotage behavior, and hiding)

There are two separate agendas within yourself that compete against each other. When things get triggered and safety gets poked, your behavior reverts back to the old habits and patterns. It will be helpful for you to realize that there are two different sides of you that are going to cause the start and stop pattern.

Read more on the blog:

https://traciandkayla.com/breaking-the-cycle-of-starting-and-stopping/

Check out: The Inspired Lifestyle

https://traciandkayla.com/the-inspired-lifestyle

Yes you can heal from trauma - if you are willing to. Results are dependent on one thing -- ACTION.

You have to be willing to do the work, but if you do the reward will be healing and triumph. You can't remove memories or experiences, but what heals is your reaction and perspective on them.

Your pain and experiences don't define you. You can adopt a mindset and lifestyle of resilience.

The human experience is to overcome challenges and hard situations. This is how we grow confidence, happiness, and grow.

You can read more on the blog:

https://traciandkayla.com/can-you-heal-from-trauma/

Pain makes you feel behind. Most people don't understand the effort and time behind reaching results and overcoming obstacles in their life. If you have had a painful past or have experienced trauma, sometimes this can make you feel behind and feel as though something has been taken from you.

It is not that you are a "crappy person" and aren't happy for other people, it's merely triggering the belief that you are behind and things get taken from you.

Rewards should never prove your worth or reason for pain experienced in life.

When you have experienced a painful past, there is a NEED for the meaning behind rewards and achievements you experience.

Read more on the blog here:

https://traciandkayla.com/why-is-it-so-hard-to-change-when-you-have-had-a-painful-past/

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A lot of people seek help to reach their goals, but usually want to go around the key element that is influencing the behaviors and patterns that keep them stuck. No one wants a label, but if we look at the information that labels bring us in a neutral way, we can see the steps necessary to lift the blocks in our life.

You can't avoid therapy and jump into coaching to work on success if there are certain behaviors holding you back.

You don't have to take on a diagnosis as your identify, but if you have something that your behavior is impacted by, it is essential for you to explore the information that comes along with the label or diagnosis in a detached way to see the tools that can help you.

You can read more on the blog here:

https://traciandkayla.com/labels-dont-define-you/

Happy people have routines!

We get inspired in the moment. We believe we will be inspired in the moment of action but it rarely happens, consistently.

We will talk ourselves out of the work of change every day.

Preparation routines help us take the initial inspiration and then create a plan. We no longer have to wait for inspiration to move forward. We just do the plan.

Read more on the blog:

https://traciandkayla.com/preparation-routines-create-success/

We love makeovers!

When you are looking to change your life. You can start with the outside first and then the inside follows, or you start with the inside and the outside follows.

Transformations should make you become more you.

Working on the outside helps you feel better but it doesn't make you love yourself so there is a need to do the inside work.

If you are working on the inside work first, it helps to understand more of who you are and then you want to make sure that the outside you is an accurate reflection of the inside you.

Read more on the blog:

https://traciandkayla.com/how-to-start-your-makeover/

We all want to feel special.

We talk about the show Catfish and how it documents the stories of people who fall in love with people for years but have never actually met in person. They have invested so much time in relationships hoping and dreaming on "the words" they hear.

People are great storytellers. They are great at telling you who they are. They are also good at showing you who they are, but you have to be willing to see it.

Love makes us do crazy things and logically we understand but our emotions take over and we get desperate to believe what we hear.

With love it pulls out the most desperate parts of our souls. There is a part of us that wants to believe we are the exception to the rule.

Read more on the blog:

https://traciandkayla.com/catfish-edition-actions-speak-louder-than-words/

Inspiration should inspire!

Your inspiration needs to inspire you in love. You are worthy of the best. But the best isn't usually what we think it is.

There is a trend that the inspirations are not inspiring. The inspirations need to help your beliefs in love. George Clooney isn't going to be the dream you think it is.

Read more on the blog:

https://traciandkayla.com/how-love-inspirations-truly-work-why-vision-boards-usually-dont/