When Valentines become NIGHTMARES ■ Why is Kyrsten Sinema being SUED by her bodyguard's WIFE? ■ Adam & Eve – how it REALLY went down ■ Is UTAH the creepiest state? ■ Meet the new BONNIE & CLYDE

Old School Santa improved kids with lumps of coal ■ Why HALLMARK actors are simp castratos ■ Why do middle-aged Americans look like children? ■ Larry's SICK plan for stadium kiss-cams ■ If Andrew Dice Clay & Sam Kinison did a Hallmark movie ■ GAY Chatgpt tells why Hallmark Romeos are weird ■The REAL MEANING of Christmas

XMAS GRIFTS – spot 'em/smash'em ■ Now everyone is Santa – why? ■ Parents SPANK educators and Apple Inc with "Schools Beyond Screens" ■ In search of ANONYMITY ■ Co-operation is sex for soyboys and girls ■ Why smartphones are more destructive than alcohol, tobacco & heroin – combined!

Why NYC is DOOMED! ■ Why Mamdani's WIG matters! ■ Who are the puppet-masters of NoKings? ■ Larry's clash with NoKings zombies ■ Why Mamdani & Obama are TWINS ■ Why LEFTISTS are always miserable ■ New Commie phrase for hunger ■ Why Mamdani may presage America's downfall

Meet CA's SYKO Gov candidate ■ Truth behind the "I'm Offended" grift ■ Who "stands on dead man's legs?" ■ Why actors (and influencers) are as OBSOLETE as pay phones ■ The pedo founder of the trans movement ■ The character who inspired the Take No Shit Dojo ■ U.S. military gets back in SHAPE!

Why DEAD RATS make GREAT weapons ■ How Beverly Hills destroyed a shitty neighbor ■ Why fences are FANTASTIC neighbors ■ Larry rewrites Robert Frost ■ Agencies that can help you wreck a neighbor!

Larry's HULK HOGAN tale ■ TSA sez shoes are OK -- WTF? ■ Why is BARBIE diabetic?! ■ Taboo words I'm reviving ■ Why assholes LIKE to be OFFENDED ■ Why RIP is stupid and PASSING THROUGH is cool

Dream or Spirit Channeling? YOU decide! ■ Larry's dream predicts the biggest story of the year ■ Build your own video DREAM RECORDER ■ REM cycles mean jack shit ■ How to know a TRUE friend ■ Larry meets Johnny Rivers and Roger Daltry

FUCKWIT gubmnt agency gives a car to every 15 workers ■ Childproofing destroys America ■ Gubmnt now regulates how you crap! ■ "MFs" wreck your life ■ Why stop/start motors, trigger locks, and lo-flo toilets suck ■ "CHAIR HEIGHT toilets / why you should SMASH them!

What do GENE SIMMONS & TRUMP have in common? ■ What phrase made Don Draper orgasm? ■ Cadillac's $300k hype-mobile ■ The WORST commercial of ALL TIME ■ What is "The Mayberry Effect?" ■ Are YOU sick of the word "BESPOKE?"