The AMPire Diaries

The AMPire Diaries Episode 94: The Vampire Diaries - “Black Hole Sun”

BEANS FOR THREE!!! (Oh yeah, I’ll have what she’s having.) Things are heating up in 1994 land, AMPies. Because this week, your favorite Vampire Diaries rewatch-slash-first-time watch (and mostly spoiler-free) combination podcast is discussing The Vampire Diaries’ “Black Hole Sun” (Season 6, Episode 4). Which means we’re talking:

- Are Jill and Morgan still mad at Steve?

- Michael Imperioli Salvatore.

- Twin rules about lying and telling the truth.

- Throuple vibes are off the charts.

- Yung Forbes.

- Dead Wife Behavior.

- GETCHA HEAD IN THE GAME.

- #DamonsWorstDay

- LaToya reminds us all to STAY. WOKE.

- The battle for Jill’s soul.

- …and another Morgan apology.

“FLASHBACKS TO YEAR 1994 IN DAMON’S LIFE” (“Black Hole Sun”)

Whether you’re a Vampire Diaries obsessive or newcomer, join along with hosts LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs—Vampire Diaries obsessive), Morgan Lutich (@LorganMutich—Vampire Diaries obsessive), and Jill Defiel (@jiilbobaggins—Vampire Diaries newcomer) on their new podcast journey. Most importantly, get AMPED (and horny) along with them on this journey. Ya gotta get AMPED.

Become a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ampdiariespod/

Email us! [email protected]

Tweet at us! @AMPDiariesPod

Instagram... at us! @AMPireDiariesPod

Go to our website! http://theampirediariespod.com/

The Official CW Promo for “Black Hole Sun”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nf5ahUwzX2Q

The Mystic Falls Event of the Week for “Black Hole Sun”: Damon doing a really bad thing in 1994

The AMPire Diaries is now available to stream on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Amazon Podcasts, as well as wherever you get your podcasts.

Don’t forget to rate (5 STARS, please) and review the podcast. And most importantly, don’t forget to get AMPED.

The AMPire Diaries Episode 93: The Originals - “Every Mother’s Son” (feat. Michael Chasin)

Let’s talk about BOYS, BA-BY! This week, your favorite Vampire Diaries rewatch-slash-first-time watch (and mostly spoiler-free) combination podcast is discussing The Originals’ “Every Mother’s Son” (Season 2, Episode 3). Which means we’re talking:

- Birds and Little Bitches.

- Elijah’s White Fanging continues.

- LET US SEE GIA STEAL THE SNAKE, YOU FUCKS. #RELEASETHESNAKECUT

- Who is and is not a part of the whole “Always and Forever” thing.

- Emily St. James’ great article on Succession and familial abuse: https://www.vox.com/culture/22777228/succession-episode-5-season-3-recap-review-retired-janitors-of-idaho-logan-abuse

- Uh… will we have crushes on Esther now?

- Yusuf Gatewood’s reimagined Finn (who rocks).

- The Fabelmans spoilers.

- An unusually musical Michael Chasin appearance.

“ALICE EVANS (“THE VAMPIRE DIARIES”) GUEST STARS IN FLASHBACKS TO THE MIKAELSON’S CHILDHOOD AND SONJA SOHN (“THE WIRE”) GUEST STARS AS NEW WITCH LENORE” (“Every Mother’s Son”)

Whether you’re a Vampire Diaries obsessive or newcomer, join along with hosts LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs—Vampire Diaries obsessive), Morgan Lutich (@LorganMutich—Vampire Diaries obsessive), and Jill Defiel (@jiilbobaggins—Vampire Diaries newcomer) on their new podcast journey. Most importantly, get AMPED (and horny) along with them on this journey. Ya gotta get AMPED.

Become a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ampdiariespod/

Email us! [email protected]

Tweet at us! @AMPDiariesPod

Instagram... at us! @AMPireDiariesPod

Go to our website! http://theampirediariespod.com/

The Official CW Promo for “Every Mother’s Son”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0JDvoWmk2U

The Mystic Falls Event of the Week for “Every Mother’s Son”: Esther achieves a long-held goal

The AMPire Diaries is now available to stream on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Amazon Podcasts, as well as wherever you get your podcasts.

Don’t forget to rate (5 STARS, please) and review the podcast. And most importantly, don’t forget to get AMPED.

The AMPire Diaries Episode 92: The Vampire Diaries - “Welcome to Paradise”

ELENA IS FINALLY ELENA AGAIN, AND HER FRIENDS! ARE! SICK OF IT! (Except for Tyler, the only good boy.) So this week, your favorite Vampire Diaries rewatch-slash-first-time watch (and mostly spoiler-free) combination podcast is discussing The Vampire Diaries’ “Welcome to Paradise” (Season 6, Episode 3). Which means we’re talking:

- HE’S HERE.

- Wow, our friends are idiots.

- Jay, Matt’s BEST FRIEND.

- Revisiting Season 1 via Jill’s recent rewatch.

- When was Morgan’s last big spoiler?

- BEANS. Yes, more bean discussion.

- Seriously, our friends were NOT listening to Markos. But to be fair, neither were we.

- Two Rats and a Baby.

- Keg Stand 2.0.

- LaToya pokes holes in this episode and season of television that she likes.

- The Lilly Kane of The Vampire Diaries.

- A rapid-fire inventory of series flops.

“TROUBLE AT THE SWIMMING HOLE” (“Welcome to Paradise”)

Whether you’re a Vampire Diaries obsessive or newcomer, join along with hosts LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs—Vampire Diaries obsessive), Morgan Lutich (@LorganMutich—Vampire Diaries obsessive), and Jill Defiel (@jiilbobaggins—Vampire Diaries newcomer) on their new podcast journey. Most importantly, get AMPED (and horny) along with them on this journey. Ya gotta get AMPED.

Become a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ampdiariespod/

Email us! [email protected]

Tweet at us! @AMPDiariesPod

Instagram... at us! @AMPireDiariesPod

Go to our website! http://theampirediariespod.com/

The Official CW Promo for “Welcome to Paradise”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKmnrQby-RQ

The Mystic Falls Event of the Week for “Welcome to Paradise”: Party at the swimming hole

The AMPire Diaries is now available to stream on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Amazon Podcasts, as well as wherever you get your podcasts.

Don’t forget to rate (5 STARS, please) and review the podcast. And most importantly, don’t forget to get AMPED.

The AMPire Diaries Episode 91: The Originals - “Alive and Kicking”

Welcome back to The Mikey Mike and Finn Show! (*APPLAUSE*) We’re back in the NOLA groove, baby. And this week, your favorite Vampire Diaries rewatch-slash-first-time watch (and mostly spoiler-free) combination podcast is discussing The Originals’ “Alive and Kicking” (Season 2, Episode 2). Which means we’re talking:

- This being a little bitch-heavy episode.

- Who do you kill first: Mikey Mike or Esther?

- She’s just a kid… and life is a nightmare.

- Elijah White Fang'ing young Marcel, as Klaus hadn’t heard of co-parenting yet.

- The last TVD character you’d EVER want anywhere near your daughter.

- Where the hell is Gerald?

- Remember: All Fiji Water is poisoned.

- Doing ollies and high-fiving a million angels.

- Do as we say, not as we do.

- A preview of LATOYA HATES… Twilight.

Remember, you can find Morgan and the paparazzi here: https://www.gotceleb.com/lisa-rinna-with-harry-hamlin-on-a-late-2022-lunch-date-in-bel-air-2023-01-02.html

“GUEST STAR NATHANIEL BUZOLIC APPEARS IN FLASHBACKS TO THE 1700’S” (“Alive and Kicking”)

Whether you’re a Vampire Diaries obsessive or newcomer, join along with hosts LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs—Vampire Diaries obsessive), Morgan Lutich (@LorganMutich—Vampire Diaries obsessive), and Jill Defiel (@jiilbobaggins—Vampire Diaries newcomer) on their new podcast journey. Most importantly, get AMPED (and horny) along with them on this journey. Ya gotta get AMPED.

Become a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ampdiariespod/

Email us! [email protected]

Tweet at us! @AMPDiariesPod

Instagram... at us! @AMPireDiariesPod

Go to our website! http://theampirediariespod.com/

The Official CW Promo for “Alive and Kicking”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVX4gtS92vg

The Mystic Falls Event of the Week for “Alive and Kicking”: Young gets White Fang'd by Elijah(and Gia’s happy death day)

The AMPire Diaries is now available to stream on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Amazon Podcasts, as well as wherever you get your podcasts.

Don’t forget to rate (5 STARS, please) and review the podcast. And most importantly, don’t forget to get AMPED.

The AMPire Diaries Episode 90: The Vampire Diaries - “Yellow Ledbetter”

Just call us Bojack Horseman, because: WE MADE IT TO THE NINETIES, BITCHES! (That we did so on Episode 90 of the podcast—not counting the brief glimpse in Episode 88—is truly a crazy random happenstance.) This week, your favorite Vampire Diaries rewatch-slash-first-time watch (and mostly spoiler-free) combination podcast is discussing The Vampire Diaries’ “Yellow Ledbetter” (Season 6, Episode 2). Which means we’re finally talking:

- THE GOOD LOBOTOMY. It’s here, folks.

- Eating your damn beans.

- Bonnie and Damon making ‘90s Purgatory look GOOD.

- Loving flashbacks… when they’re actually a clip show.

- Defining the word “Gemini.” (Shout out to Gemini’s Twin from Saturday Night Live.)

- “Who’s Damon Salvatore?”

- Matt Davis, unfortunately, rocking the house.

- Morgan and the paparazzi, as seen here: https://www.gotceleb.com/lisa-rinna-with-harry-hamlin-on-a-late-2022-lunch-date-in-bel-air-2023-01-02.html

- The RIGHT time to play “Cut” by Plumb.

- This being an all-time episode of the podcast.

Also, for the future: Just remember LaToya defending Ivy here. Write that in your vampire diaries.

“A LONG WAY HOME” (“Yellow Ledbetter”)

Whether you’re a Vampire Diaries obsessive or newcomer, join along with hosts LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs—Vampire Diaries obsessive), Morgan Lutich (@LorganMutich—Vampire Diaries obsessive), and Jill Defiel (@jiilbobaggins—Vampire Diaries newcomer) on their new podcast journey. Most importantly, get AMPED (and horny) along with them on this journey. Ya gotta get AMPED.

Become a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ampdiariespod/

Email us! [email protected]

Tweet at us! @AMPDiariesPod

Instagram... at us! @AMPireDiariesPod

Go to our website! http://theampirediariespod.com/

The Official CW Promo for “Yellow Ledbetter”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9uNHp9COvc

The Mystic Falls Event of the Week for “Yellow Ledbetter”: THE. GOOD. LOBOTOMY.

The AMPire Diaries is now available to stream on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Amazon Podcasts, as well as wherever you get your podcasts.

Don’t forget to rate (5 STARS, please) and review the podcast. And most importantly, don’t forget to get AMPED.

The AMPire Diaries Episode 89: The Originals - “Rebirth”

AMPies, The Originals Season 1 may have been messy (and, well, bad), but we are FINALLY covering Season 2! Get into it. Because this week, your favorite Vampire Diaries rewatch-slash-first-time watch (and mostly spoiler-free) combination podcast is discussing The Originals’ “Rebirth” (Season 2, Episode 1). Which means we’re talking:

- Our thoughts on New Finn, New Kol, and New Esther. Get ready, sisters.

- Grey Damon and so many stars and shows of “his” era.

- Our public apology to Thierry, who may have been… talented?

- Going all-in on Artist Klaus.

- Real Estate Dealz.

- NO. THRUSTING.

- Mikey Mike and Davina <3333

- WHERE is GERALD?

- Good Hayley shit.

- A new hot girl has entered the chat.

- George W. Bush.

- Jill’s Season 2 predictions.

Also, at one point, Morgan says, “Hybrids are invisible.” (when she meant to say, “Hybrids are invincible.”) and we all somehow missed it. Sorry to miss out on a choice dunking moment.

ALSO: “Thierry’s” music is actually Clifford Brown’s music (“Easy Living”). Good job, Clifford.

“REBUILDING HOMES AND RECRUITING NEW FAMILY” (“Rebirth”)

Whether you’re a Vampire Diaries obsessive or newcomer, join along with hosts LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs—Vampire Diaries obsessive), Morgan Lutich (@LorganMutich—Vampire Diaries obsessive), and Jill Defiel (@jiilbobaggins—Vampire Diaries newcomer) on their new podcast journey. Most importantly, get AMPED (and horny) along with them on this journey. Ya gotta get AMPED.

Become a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ampdiariespod/

Email us! [email protected]

Tweet at us! @AMPDiariesPod

Instagram... at us! @AMPireDiariesPod

Go to our website! http://theampirediariespod.com/

The Official CW Promo for “Rebirth”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nOBTr55rNlM

The Mystic Falls Event of the Week for “Rebirth”: Revenge against the Guerrera werewolves

The AMPire Diaries is now available to stream on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Amazon Podcasts, as well as wherever you get your podcasts.

Don’t forget to rate (5 STARS, please) and review the podcast. And most importantly, don’t forget to get AMPED.

The AMPire Diaries Episode 88: The Vampire Diaries - “I’ll Remember”

What’s that sound, AMPies? That’s the sound of your AMPie Queens chanting “SEASON 6! SEASON 6! SEASON 6!” Finally, The AMPire Diaries have made it to the Promised Land–and we’re not talking Markos-based episodes, baby. We’re talking Season 6 of The Vampire Diaries. Yes, this week, your favorite Vampire Diaries rewatch-slash-first-time watch (and mostly spoiler-free) combination podcast is finally back and discussing The Vampire Diaries’ “I’ll Remember” (Season 6, Episode 1). Which means we’re talking:

- Leg-lengthening surgery. (By the way, Ian Somerhalder is 6'4".)

- Isobel Saltzman returns.

- The BEST FRIENDS are back.

- The kind of behavior that warrants a good lobotomy.

- Speaking of: "The Border Lurker" Elena Gilbert

- The Whitmore College mascot.

- The optics of THAT Tyler and Luke scene.

- What kind of cop Matt SHOULD be.

And here is the link to that humorous Vampire Diaries’ Season 6 Comic-Con vid: https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x256zm7

“FRESH STARTS AND SECOND CHANCES” (“I’ll Remember”)

Whether you’re a Vampire Diaries obsessive or newcomer, join along with hosts LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs—Vampire Diaries obsessive), Morgan Lutich (@LorganMutich—Vampire Diaries obsessive), and Jill Defiel (@jiilbobaggins—Vampire Diaries newcomer) on their new podcast journey. Most importantly, get AMPED (and horny) along with them on this journey. Ya gotta get AMPED.

Become a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ampdiariespod/

Email us! [email protected]

Tweet at us! @AMPDiariesPod

Instagram... at us! @AMPireDiariesPod

Go to our website! http://theampirediariespod.com/

The Official CW Promo for “I’ll Remember”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yi7BpfI2_LI

The Mystic Falls Event of the Week for “I’ll Remember”: Whitmore College’s Opening Game Day (for football)

The AMPire Diaries is now available to stream on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Amazon Podcasts, as well as wherever you get your podcasts.

Don’t forget to rate (5 STARS, please) and review the podcast. And most importantly, don’t forget to get AMPED.

BONUS: The AMPire Diaries Presents… Father Kieran Konfessional

Hello, AMPies! With The Vampire Diaries (Season 5) and The Originals (Season 1) coverage completed and your AMPie Queens taking a much-needed break (at least on the feed, not so much behind the scenes), there was obviously only one way The AMPire Diaries could officially close out 2022. With the much-anticipated Father Kieran Konfessional episode!

What started as a way to gain intel from the AMPie Diaries’ Patreon (subscribe today!) Discord about whether they wanted to “SMASH” or “PASS” on The Originals’ Father Kieran ([email protected]) has now become a totally legit way for your AMPie Queens to absolve our AMPies of their sins. And trust us–y’all do a lot of sinning. Baby Jesus would be so proud of us.

***SPOILER WARNING*** A brief look into how the sausage is made: We recorded this Konfessional after we’d already recorded our Vampire Diaries Season 6 premiere episode, as well as after LaToya had started her own individual TVD S6/TO S2 rewatch. So while there may be mentions of new character names and vague allusions to future bits, this remains a Jill-safe episode. So no true worries on that front.

***HORNY WARNING*** Oh boy, this is a naughty episode. Particularly toward the end. Merry Christmas, ya filthy AMPies.

The AMPire Diaries Episode 87: The Vampire Diaries - “Home” (feat. Michael Chasin)

We’ve (alongside the boy, Michael Chasin—@MichaelChasin) come to the end, our AMPie friends. The end of our TVD Season 5 coverage and our regular episode drops for 2022. We’ve come a long, long way together. Through the hard times and the good. We’ve got to celebrate Season 5, baby. (And dunk on it where it’s appropriate.) We have to praise it (and again, dunk on it) like we should. This week, your favorite Vampire Diaries rewatch-slash-first-time watch (and mostly spoiler-free) combination podcast is discussing The Vampire Diaries’ “Home” (Season 5, Episode 22). Which means we’re talking:

- Perhaps our most chaotic intro yet.

- Reminder: We are pro-Alaric Saltzman, NOT pro-Matt Davis.

- Jill has never been more confused.

- Liv and Luke’s Bogus Journey.

- Who Markos wants to fuck.

- Morgan issues a proverbial “sorry to this man.” (“This man” is Steven R. McQueen.)

- It’s time to stay woke about another Matt: Matt Donovan.

- Luke reveals his third character trait after “gay” and “brother.”

- PEACE O’CLOCK.

- Jill’s predictions for next season.

“AN EXPLOSIVE SEASON FINALE” (“Home”)

Whether you’re a Vampire Diaries obsessive or newcomer, join along with hosts LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs—Vampire Diaries obsessive), Morgan Lutich (@LorganMutich—Vampire Diaries obsessive), and Jill Defiel (@jiilbobaggins—Vampire Diaries newcomer) on their new podcast journey. Most importantly, get AMPED (and horny) along with them on this journey. Ya gotta get AMPED.

Become a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ampdiariespod/

Email us! [email protected]

Tweet at us! @AMPDiariesPod

Instagram... at us! @AMPireDiariesPod

Go to our website! http://theampirediariespod.com/

The Official CW Promo for “Home”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k-V5r5tk8pI

The Mystic Falls Event of the Week for Home”: The Other Side’s collapse (plus, folks dying and returning from the dead)

The AMPire Diaries is now available to stream on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Amazon Podcasts, as well as wherever you get your podcasts.

Don’t forget to rate (5 STARS, please) and review the podcast. And most importantly, don’t forget to get AMPED.

The AMPire Diaries Episode 86: The Originals - “From a Cradle to a Grave”

AMPies (and SISTERS), take heed: THE TINY MENACE IS HERE! Yes, it is season finale time (Originals-style) and time to really get this Nola party started. This week, your favorite Vampire Diaries rewatch-slash-first-time watch (and mostly spoiler-free) combination podcast is discussing The Originals’ “From a Cradle to a Grave” (Season 1, Episode 22). Which means we’re talking:

- ATTENTION: Welcome to The Originals, Hayley Marshall!

- AMPie Queen cry counts and on-pod crying.

- SEE YA, NIECE DENISE. You will not be missed.

- Morgan finally fills in the blanks she had going ahead and watching Season 2 without finishing this season.

- The return of Esther, the appropriation queen (and “The Original Witch”).

- The debut of a man that LaToya loves.

- Important Question: Should you watch The Originals?

Also, for reasons that will become apparent as you listen, please note: We recorded this episode before Kirstie Alley’s death.

“THE ORIGINALS MOTHER AND CHILD IN PERIL” (“From a Cradle to a Grave”)

Whether you’re a Vampire Diaries obsessive or newcomer, join along with hosts LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs—Vampire Diaries obsessive), Morgan Lutich (@LorganMutich—Vampire Diaries obsessive), and Jill Defiel (@jiilbobaggins—Vampire Diaries newcomer) on their new podcast journey. Most importantly, get AMPED (and horny) along with them on this journey. Ya gotta get AMPED.

Become a patron! https://www.patreon.com/ampdiariespod/

Email us! [email protected]

Tweet at us! @AMPDiariesPod

Instagram... at us! @AMPireDiariesPod

Go to our website! http://theampirediariespod.com/

The Official CW Promo for “From a Cradle to a Grave”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cTQQq4GIrKQ

The Mystic Falls Event of the Week for “From a Cradle to a Grave”: The birth and “death” of the tiny menace

The AMPire Diaries is now available to stream on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, and Amazon Podcasts, as well as wherever you get your podcasts.

Don’t forget to rate (5 STARS, please) and review the podcast. And most importantly, don’t forget to get AMPED.