The Average 90's Gal Podcast

Happy Solstice! In this episode I share why I treat the solstice—not January 1st—as my true new year. Whether you’re in the Northern Hemisphere (Winter Solstice) or Southern Hemisphere (Summer Solstice), you’ll learn how to use this turning point of the sun to release old patterns, set soul-led intentions, and reconnect with your inner self.  ​

Through my own end-of-year journaling ritual, I walk you through:

How I read a year’s worth of journals, tear out what matters, and recycle the rest as an act of mental and emotional decluttering.  ​

Why I prefer intentions and commitments over goals and resolutions—and how you can choose one bold intention and one grounding commitment for the next six months.  ​

What it looks like to consciously let go of laziness, fear, roadblocks, and the stories about what others might think, so there’s room for a new version of you to emerge.  ​​

If you’re craving:

A gentle, reflective alternative to harsh New Year’s resolutions

A nature-led way to mark time using the Solstice and Equinox as checkpoints

Journaling prompts to clarify who you want to become in the next six months

…this episode will feel like a quiet, candlelit conversation with a friend reminding you that you’re allowed to start over, slow down, and come home to yourself.  ​

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Q: What is the Winter Solstice and why do you treat it as the real new year?
A: The Winter Solstice (in the Northern Hemisphere) is the shortest day and longest night of the year, symbolizing a turning point when light slowly begins to return. I use it as my real new year because it naturally supports going inward, releasing the past, and setting intentions for the next six months instead of forcing year-long resolutions.  ​

Q: How can I use the Solstice for intention setting if I live in the Southern Hemisphere?
A: If you’re in the Southern Hemisphere, the Solstice is your Summer Solstice and represents outward energy, growth, and the longest day of the year. You can still set intentions by focusing on how you want to shine externally—creatively, socially, or professionally—over the next six months.  ​

Q: What is the difference between goals, intentions, and grounding commitments in this episode?
A: Goals often feel rigid and outcome-based, while intentions focus on who you want to be and how you want to live. Grounding commitments are daily or weekly actions—like moving your body, writing, or eating closer to nature—that support those intentions in a practical, sustainable way.  ​

Q: What are some examples of things to let go of on the Solstice?
A: I share that I am letting go of laziness, fear, self-created roadblocks, and worrying about what others might think or what I imagine they will think. You might release old stories, relationships, habits, clutter, body shame, or beliefs that no longer match who you’re becoming.  ​

Q: What is “pretend the power is out” day?
A: It’s a weekly digital detox ritual I imagine for myself, where I avoid screens and plugged-in devices, light candles, read, write, go outside, and reconnect with myself and nature without constant digital noise. It’s meant to be a calm, restorative day to reset your nervous system and creativity.  ​

Welcome to Part 2 of my conversation with Brad and Jess! In this episode we touch on so many topics, such as friendship, technology, different generations, and everything in between!

Key Topics Discussed:

Building Community Through Neighborhood Bars

Generational Technology Divide

Modern Parenting in the Digital Age

Work-Life Balance for Bar Owners 

The Future of Bars Post-COVID

Be sure to visit American Cheez and Mama Tried in Brooklyn!

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In this Real Stories episode, I chat with Brad and Jess about growing up Gen X, leaving (and skipping) college, and how bartending in New York City evolved into owning two beloved Brooklyn neighborhood bars: Mama Tried in Sunset Park and American Cheez in Park Slope.

They share honest stories about family, divorce, travel, college-town life, and why the bar world still offers freedom, community, and creativity you rarely find in a traditional career. I hope this conversation provides more proof that there is never one direction in life, and you can choose the path that is right for you.

I hope you will also listen to Part 2!

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In this latest Transform from Within episode, I explore the roots and impact of envy and jealousy on personal growth, emphasizing the need to “clear out the gunk” inside to make space for transformation. ​

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Key Topics Covered​

Recognizing triggers: How envy and jealousy show up in daily life, relationships, and social media usage.  ​

The healthy side of envy: Using envy as motivation and inspiration for positive change (as opposed to negative comparison loops).  ​

The role of past experiences: How childhood events or family stories subtly shape trust issues and self-worth.  ​

Social media’s impact: Strategies for avoiding comparison traps—such as stepping away from social platforms if they consistently spark negativity.  ​

Actionable Takeaways

Journal prompts for self-inquiry: Identify when and why envy or jealousy appears. Dig for the root cause—what need or wound is being exposed?  ​

Strategies for healing: Trace patterns back to origin, reflect, and give yourself what’s needed to move forward with self-acceptance and clarity.  ​

Tough love and self-awareness: Embrace honesty about difficult emotions as a pathway to strength, self-trust, and emotional “lightness”.  ​​

Prompts

“What emotion is this situation or person triggering inside me?”

“Why is this emotion being triggered?”

“What do I feel I’m lacking?”  

Welcome to the "Transform From Within" series, to help you bring about lasting transformation that begins within!

In this first episode, I will share practical methods for identifying and releasing blame, shame, and limiting beliefs to help you move closer to your authentic goals and dreams. ​

Key Takeaways:

Transformation starts within: True life change happens only when we address what is holding us back inside ourselves—not just outside circumstances or people. ​

Self-blame and external blame are intertwined: Often, holding onto anger or blame connects us to negative experiences and people, preventing healing and growth. Visualizing and writing out the people, places, and events blamed for pain can help break these patterns. ​

Shame is a powerful roadblock: Shame can stem from past actions, childhood messages, or internalized beliefs about worthiness, success, and identity. Naming shame and forgiving yourself are essential steps to moving forward. ​

Limiting beliefs hold us back: Beliefs rooted in childhood, past experiences, or messages from others may prevent you from pursuing what you want. Addressing and reframing these beliefs is key. ​

Tools for release:

Visualization: Imagine cutting the energetic cord of blame or shame, or watch yourself release it into a river.

Somatic and mindfulness practices: Breathing exercises, shaking, and movement help clear negative energy from the body.

Journaling: Write out things or people you blame or beliefs holding you back, then reflect and release them.

Affirmations: Replace shaming or limiting beliefs with statements of self-acceptance and potential.

Professional support: Seek therapy for deeper wounds or persistent patterns; the episode recommends talk therapy if struggles are overwhelming. ​

The importance of clearing the path: Before pursuing new goals or dreams, making room by processing and releasing old hurt and negativity is crucial for success and for living authentically. ​

Final Thoughts

You are encouraged to begin, even imperfectly, the inward journey of confronting blame and shame, since clearing inner roadblocks is foundational for any outer transformation. The series will continue with practical steps and inspiration for becoming the person you already are inside and living a more authentic and aligned life!

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In this Real Stories episode, I chat with Grace, who shares:

- Her path to becoming a teacher in NYC

- Starting a foundation

- Losing her brother to suicide

- How she stays authentic to herself and to her calling

This is a wonderful episode for anyone who needs some motivation to go after what they want and to never be afraid to show the world who they are!

Connect with Grace: 

The Dan O'Connor Foundation

On IG: @danoconnorfoundation

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Suicide & Suicide Loss Support and Resources:

If you or someone you know is struggling, please dial 988 or text TALK to 741-741

Losing a Loved One to Suicide

Suicide Loss Resources

Teens and Suicide

When Someone is at Risk

More Resources

In this Real Stories episode I chat with Doreen Marshall, Ph.D., CEO of the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA). She takes us through her education and career path before we dive into eating disorder and disordered eating signs, symptoms, how to talk about them, as well as her take of the affects of social media and GLP-1s, and so much more.

This episode is packed with important information that everyone should hear!

In-episode information: 

NEDA

NEDA Screening Tool

Finding Treatment

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It may be a cliché, but life really is too short. Too short to not tell the people in your life that they mean something to you, to not take the risks, and to wait.

This very short episode was recorded on a whim, prompted by something I had been thinking about after attending a memorial service.

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In part two of Real Stories with Kennan and Karen, we chat about their career paths and shifts, their journey through and following Kennan's traumatic brain injury, the why behind starting their business, and so much more!

I hope you enjoy this part as much as I did!

Listen to Part One

Connect with Kennan and Karen: 

Empathway Designs

LinkedIn

Podcast 

In part one of this Real Stories episode, I chat with Kennan and Karen, who share their personal stories as well as the story that brought them together.

I hope you enjoy their energy, insight, and connection to one another, while finding your own inspiration to travel and follow your heart :) 

Connect with Kennan and Karen: 

Empathway Designs

LinkedIn

Podcast